It is more than just interesting how advertisers are rebelling against free television’s current crop of lurid, creepy content.  For the Hollywood elite, this is a canary in the coal mine, and they should heed that figurative dead bird’s warning.  Their time as the sole arbiters of what will and will not be seen is ending.  And the conservative movement stands to gain.

As the Wall Street Journal recently reported (subscription required):

The world’s biggest retailer, Wal-Mart Stores, and Procter & Gamble, the world’s biggest consumer-products maker, are jointly creating a made-for-TV movie, in an effort to promote “family-friendly” alternatives to what they say is increasingly risqué TV fare.

The two advertising heavyweights have teamed up on the two-hour “Secrets of the Mountain,” to be broadcast in April on NBC. The movie, which focuses on a single mother who brings her family to a mountainside cabin, highlights values—such as generosity, honesty and togetherness—that Wal-Mart and P&G executives say are in short supply on television.

Now, the root cause of the problem is clear.  Television and other Hollywood executives are interested in two kinds of currency.  One currency is dollars.  The other is coolness.  And you don’t get a coolness payoff by producing entertainment involving decent people and solid values.  Sure, a show about a normal family, free of the perversions and bizarre Blue Velvet-esque weirdness Hollywoodoids always seem to attribute to normal Americans, might make money.  But what are your peers going to think?  Are you going to win an Emmy?  Are you going to be labeled a visionary?  Are girls with piercings and daddy issues going to even want to talk to you anymore? (more…)

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If there is one overriding theme coursing through reviews of Smokey and the Bandit, it is superficiality. Read through the mountain of pieces out there, and you’ll continually be assaulted with adjectives like “silly,” “mindless,” “breezy,” “fun,” and “stupid.” Taken together, they blend into a gargantuan wall of polite derision. Even those who genuinely adore the movie scoff at efforts to peek under the film’s thematic hood. Burt Reynolds himself has stated that “Anybody who would take that picture seriously needs a psychiatrist.”

Well, I disagree. A movie’s effect on the culture is often independent of intellectual considerations. The passage of years highlights a film’s vintage regardless of pedigree or awards. Father Time has a sneaky way of giving even erstwhile pop-culture artifacts a rich patina of nostalgia and meaning. And so it happens that light-footed entertainments like Smokey sometimes have lessons to teach, if only we can muster the wisdom to listen.

Let’s return for a moment to the film critic Gary Arnold, who in the summer of 1977 penned a lengthy appreciation of Smokey for The Washington Post. Along with Star Wars, Hal Needham’s film was dominating the domestic box office, especially at the drive-in theaters that were still fairly common in rural America. Given the movie’s success and the CB phenomenon, an article about the picture was a no-brainer. But what’s interesting about Arnold’s essay is how he goes beyond mere cinematic merit and expands his analysis into the realms of culture and politics: (more…)

These days, big-city philistines posing as cultural elites call it “flyover country.” From the comfort of a private jet, it looks like a vast ocean of emptiness. And yet, every election day, media newsrooms find themselves grudgingly painting that part of the map red — blood red.

To them, the American hinterland is part Deliverance, part Raising Arizona. Toothless gas-station attendants. Frumpy diner waitresses. Motor-home brothels hedging the highways. In the Heat of the Night racist police officers on the prowl, yee-haw! Ignorant picnicking churchgoers spewing toxic barbecue fumes into the pristine blue sky. Country-music lovin’ high school students destined to grow up into unwashed, uncouth, uneducated truckers.

Coast-bound libs fancy the South as kinda like Cormac McCarthy’s The Road, but with Wal-Marts. Flyover country. A nightmare realm.

Well, back in the summer of 1977, flyover country was pissed. The nation they loved was being run into the ground by the jet-setters. Skyrocketing inflation. Rampant unemployment. Plummeting GDP. Crushing misery index. Multiple oil crises. Vanishing trade surpluses. A wretched President. Ordinary people were scared and angry, looking for — what’s the word? — oh yeah, “change.” Spare or otherwise. (more…)

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Right, so let’s say you’re Buffy Wicks.  You were the director of the Obama campaign in Missouri, probably doing some “organizing,” you were there during those raucous Texas caucuses, and you were Obama’s California Field Director.  You love you some Barack Obama, and you’re great at what you do, which is rabble rousing, “organizing”.  Now you call it “engaging”.  You were great at this when you went after Walmart for the UFCW Union as political director of the WakeUpWalmart campaign.  Anyway, people noticed, and now that your candidate won, there’s a spot for you in the White House!  In fact, when you visit one of your immediate bosses, whether it’s Christina Tchen or Valerie Jarrett, you probably have to pass the Vice-President and Rahm Emanuel’s office before you reach the stairs to the second floor.  Oops, careful Buffy, because if you walk much past those stairs you could walk right into the Oval Office….you are definitely in the White House!

Anyway, once you get upstairs it’s literally a few short steps to Valerie Jarret’s office.  She’s been crazy busy integrating Van Jones into the new ruling class, so you might pass her office and it’s only one more door to go.  Now you’re at the corner suite of Christina Tschen, Chicago lawyer, long-time Obama crony friend and major fundraiser for his campaign.  She must have raised a lot of dough, because her office is pretty sweet, and it’s right above Barack Obama’s Oval Office.  Cool, huh? (more…)

I just got home from Comic-Con. In a couple hours I have to take a shower and head back downtown for a big party my Hollywood management company invited me to. Every year they team with a bunch of other companies and throw a huge industry mixer. They’re usually really crowded and noisy, but there’s free food and drinks and I usually met interesting people.

This year they also teamed up with Wired magazine and set up a private green room called the “Wired Cafe,” where select people from the press and the industry are invited during the day. They have a bunch of laptops set up for people to blog and tweet and a cafe with an open bar and great food. I decided to go there for lunch instead of my usual haunts. I had a Smoked Turkey Panini and considered a Dim Sum sampler, which the person at my table ordered with his Burger. Maybe tomorrow. (more…)

Green Day, which has been around since the late 1980s but only achieved mainstream commercial success with their 2004 album American Idiot, has a bone to pick with Wal-Mart. Why? Wal-Mart won’t carry their new CD, entitled 21st Century Breakdown, unless they provide a special version that doesn’t contain language considered offensive by the retail giant.

Wal-Mart has a longstanding policy about not selling CDs that would require a parental advisory sticker, but that doesn’t stop the navel-gazing band from kvetching about what they seem to perceive as censorship:

“They want artists to censor their records in order to be carried in there,” he said. “We just said no. We’ve never done it before. You feel like you’re in 1953 or something.”

Newsflash to the boys in the band: that’s what’s called making a business decision. Wal-Mart’s business decision is to ask bands to create “clean” versions of their albums for sale in Wal-Mart stores. Some bands comply while others, like Green Day, do not – in turn making their own business decision (something that Obama has yet to take away from businesses other than some in the auto industry). (more…)

(Thundering tympanies, swirling spotlights)

Announcer

Live! From the fabulous Turtle Bay Ballroom at United Nations Headquarters, it’s the Rat Pack of Evil All-Star International Celebrity Roast of President Barack Obama!

(orchestra fanfare: ‘Make ‘Em Laugh’)

With Pyongyang funnyman Kim Jong-Il! Borscht Belt headliner Vlady Putin! Queen of Mean Liz Windsor! Saudi Sheik of Schtick King Abdullah! Beijing jokeslinger Hu Jintao! Wacky al Qaeda Caveman Ayman al-Zawahiri! Nick ‘the Knife’ Sarkozy! Sassy Wanda Sykes! South-of-the-border slapstick team Hugo Chavez and the Castro Brothers! Taliban Madman Mullah Omar! Jon Stewart! Lovable Libyan lush Muammar al-Ghadaffi! Grovelin’ Guvner Gordy Brown! Bashar “The Chin” al-Assad! The Hamas Fattah Dancers! And starring your Master of Ceremonies — that suntan man with a plan from Iran — that Persian with a nuclear perversion — Sheckyyyyyy Ahmedinejad!

(applause)

Shecky Ahmedinejad

Okay, okay, pipe down. Let’s get this thing over with, this straitjacket is a rental and my magic carpet is double-parked on East 43rd. Mohamed H. Prophet, will you get a load of the evil on the stage tonight? I haven’t seen this many bombs since Janeane Garofalo played the American Legion convention. (more…)

My son is only three weeks old, but he’s already impacting how I feel about censorship and marketing in the 21st century.

Kevin Smith’s latest raunch-fest, “Zack and Miri Make a Porno,” comes out on DVD Tuesday (Feb. 3). It’s a sweet romance wrapped in Smith’s signature humor – the R-rated variety. Nothing wrong with that, assuming older audiences are the ones gobbling up the movie tickets – or DVDs starting this week.

But Wal-Mart didn’t want to stock the DVD with the word “Porno” in the title. The Weinstein Company, which is distributing the DVD, agreed to meet their request.

The Red Bank, N.J. native is bemused by the brou ha ha.

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