But with the new film “I’m Still Here,” which was shot by his brother-in-law and fellow actor Casey Affleck in the two years following his near-triumph, Phoenix appears to show that fame has an incredibly destructive and debilitating side as well. Or does he?

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That central question – whether “I’m Still Here” is a straight documentary of an acclaimed movie star’s debilitating fall from grace, or if it’s a fake documentary shooting humorously poisoned darts straight at the heart of Hollywood – has been debated in Tinseltown and via gossip outlets for the past two years. The reason is that Affleck carried around a camera to follow Phoenix as he appeared to declare his retirement from acting due to artistic dissatisfaction and the pressures of fame, and instead embarked on a bizarre attempt at a rap career.

Perhaps the most infamous moment of Phoenix’s exploits during that time occurred when he appeared on the David Letterman show to plug his art-house film “Two Lovers,” and proceeded to mumble one or two word answers while hiding behind shades, and unkempt hair and beard worthy of the Unabomber. Footage of that train wreck – which was alternately funny and mortifying – is readily available (and highly recommended) on YouTube, and the incident caused many to wonder if Phoenix had lost his marbles or if it was a brilliant ruse with Letterman in on the joke.

“I’m Still Here” offers plenty of other cringe-worthy moments, many of which far surpass the Letterman incident. Along the way, Phoenix inarticulately spouts off the F-word about 6 million times in various combinations, is seen gleefully snorting coke and even ordering a pair of hookers online with some shockingly misogynistic comments along the way.

He stumbles into and out of encounters with the likes of Ben Stiller, Edward James Olmos and P. Diddy (or is it Diddy? Or back to Puff Daddy? Mr. Combs? – even Phoenix doesn’t seem to know in one of the film’s funniest scenes.) He also has a male friend who for no apparent reason is shown getting out of a tub and then dancing around fully naked, with nothing left to the imagination.

MAJOR SPOILER ALERT: Because “I’m Still Here” is hardly playing in any cities and is unlikely to expand to any sort of wide release, I’ll spill the beans on what I’ve figured out about the movie and whether it’s real or not. The end credits say “written and directed by Casey Affleck and Joaquin Phoenix,” while the people shown are listed as “Cast” and a couple of them are not listed as being themselves. Therefore, it can’t be real.

On the other hand, it is shot SO realistically that the idea of it being staged actually adds some level of brilliance to what otherwise would be an often-pointless or unpleasant exercise. This really looks like a home movie, which means the camera is often bouncy and sometimes even goes out of focus for a moment, and it’s played so deadpan that the biggest laughs come sporadically while watching.

But in thinking back and describing the incidents involved to others after the fact – especially the Ben Stiller scene, in which Stiller is frustrated by the fact that Phoenix thinks Stiller sent him the script to “Greenberg” for consideration in a supporting role rather than as the actual star and they break into an exasperated argument. And the scene where Diddy listens incredulously to the awful rap tracks Phoenix brings in grows in funniness the more I think about it.

Add it up, and it really is baffling to consider who this movie was made for. It’s certainly audacious, and perhaps even an indictment of excessive movie-star behavior and the Hollywood machine that fuels and perpetuates it. And its title seems to be a reference to another odd, but distinctly fictional, film about Bob Dylan from a couple years back: “I’m Not There.”

All told, even as it’s alternately funny and disconcerting, it is a bold piece of work in its own way. He put himself out there, against all possible conventional wisdom. But save it for Netflix, and only if you’re really curious to see just what the heck Phoenix was up to during those years in the wilderness (which he may still be in – he doesn’t seem to have any other projects lined up, and this might just kill any attempts to do one.)

Two Lovers is a splendid exception, both evoking a mood and telling a story. Not a complicated story, not a Jurassic Park story, and not even a Moody Family Drama story, but a story of familiar feelings in what for most us will be an unfamiliar setting populated by unfamiliar people. Two Lovers is mood-heavy account of a young man’s simultaneous romances with two women. Instead of ending up in bathos–the usual destination–the filmmakers show this young man carrying around his past while he tries to find a happy future. This conflict directs the nature and depth of the romances. In the end we see how happy endings are sometimes the saddest of all.

Joaquin Phoenix plays this fellow, and the character seems entirely likely thanks to two things. The smart script from Ric Menello and James Gray (who also directed) does just what a script is supposed to do: use moments of activity to show–not tell–how this young man feels about himself and life. The introverted delivery boy turns out to be an occasionally smooth ladies’ man, a dancer, a joker, a conversationalist. We wouldn’t have suspected that until we see him become these things, and the discovery is an engaging surprise that also contributes to mood. Dissonance is key: like a real person, this character contains contradiction, and it makes us want to know him.

The other thing that makes the character likely is the “acting skill” (whatever that is—I have never been able to quantify it) of Joaquin Phoenix, who makes us believe we’re seeing someone experience happiness and sadness and frustration—especially frustration—in the appropriate measure at the appropriate time. I don’t know how he does that, and I’ve long believed that success at doing that is more a matter of matching an actor to a role than any particular ability an actor has—but no matter. I noticed his stinginess with smiles, his sudden openness with his feelings, and displays of (to me) real passion, and maybe that’s part of how Phoenix succeeds in making us care. He gives us a young man walled off from some of the life every young man deserves, living with mental illness, recovering from heartbreak, looking for a future and trying hard to find how much he can temper his restlessness and still be satisfied with reality.

Of course, it is that personal connection that always reaches deepest. For those of us past a certain age, to see him work through this matter of settling down is to remember going through it ourselves. If you’re too young to have had to make certain choices (and are the sort to read this kind of review this far), Two Lovers will likely be troubling by its familiarity with your life and the decisions you sense are coming. It’s that good, and there aren’t many pictures as evocative and engaging as this one.

I ask this because in “Two Lovers,” which hit nationwide release this week, Joaquin Phoenix plays a Jewish guy whose parents want him to date (and marry) the beautiful Jewish daughter (Vinessa Shaw), of the couple who are buying their business.  But, instead, he prefers the hot blonde gentile woman (played by the half-Jewish Gwyneth Paltrow) who doesn’t want him.  The Jewish woman as the safe, not-as-sexy-or-hot choice is nothing new in Hollywood.  We’ve seen it in sooo many TV shows and flicks, like the 1972 incarnation of “The Heartbreak Kid” in which Elliott Gould Charles Grodin dumps the homely Jewish stereotype-ette for the hot (at that time) Cybill Shepherd.

Read my review of “Two Lovers” and note that this stereotype can also work if you reverse the roles of each sex.  For example, in the far superior and much warmer “Crossing Delancey” (1988), Amy Irving (who was not Jewish, but reportedly converted to marry Steven Spielberg) plays a Jewish woman who was in love with the male version of the Gwyneth Paltrow character, an author who didn’t really love her back.  At the urging of her grandmother, she dates (and falls in love with) the more nebbishe/geeky Peter Riegert.

“Delancey” was 21 years ago and I thought we’d advanced.  But apparently, the same Jewish liberals who are embarrassed about the first of those two adjectives are still running the show.  They just don’t like themselves any more.  Plus, they’re still trying to get away from their mothers, apparently.

There are plenty of beautiful Jewish women (some even blonde) in Hollywood, including my cousin, actress Amelia Kingston (real name: Shannon Schlussel).  Sad that Hollywood still wants you to think they’re the ugly, annoying caricatures in the Protocols of the Elders of Zion.

More sad that the ones doing the caricaturing are neither Muslims nor Nazis, but my own fellow co-religionists.

Note: This post has been updated. Both Vinessa Shaw and Joaquin Phoenix were incorrectly identified as not being Jewish. We regret the error and thank the readers who pointed this out.