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You want to know why that clip is funny? Because “SNL” is actually going after a bona fide sacred cow. I mean, a real sacred cow, not a fake one like the Catholic Church. Further proof of that protected status comes from GLAAD itself:

The piece was a mock commercial for estrogen replacement therapy and featured men with facial hair wearing dresses, meant to represent transgender women. This segment cannot be defended as “just a joke” because there was no “joke” to speak of. The attempted comedy of the skit hinges solely on degrading the lives and experiences of transgender women. Holding people up for ridicule simply on the basis of their identity fuels a hurtful climate and puts people in danger, especially given how infrequently the media shines a fair and accurate light on the lives of transgender people. “The violence, discrimination and harassment that transgender Americans experience each and every day is no laughing matter,” said GLAAD President Jarrett Barrios. “Saturday Night Live is a touchstone of American comedy, but Saturday’s unfunny skit sends a destructive and dehumanizing message.”

Whatever. They have every right to fight back, I guess. Between this and that “electric cars are gay” joke, the entire non-heterosexual community must feel as under assault as Sarah Palin. Two jokes in one year. It’s a regular Hate-a-palooza out here.

What is silly, though, is the petition to demand an apology. As of this writing, 2,255 people have signed on. Not exactly the kind of numbers necessary to put a chill down the spine of NBC but most certainly the kind of numbers that likely prove that the people GLAAD claims to represent are better able to laugh at themselves than their joyless “spokespeople.”

Amanda Simpson

Me too. After all, I’m also a trailblazer – as the world’s first gnome to host a news program, I feel a lot of pressure from the woodland creature community to succeed. If I do, then who knows who might follow in my footsteps: centaurs, minotaurs, fawns, succubi, hags, ogres, tree-people, trolls, marsh-wiggles, People of the Toadstools (don’t call them “toads”), and finally, one day: Robert Reich.

But Amanda, you only have the groups that champion transgender rights – as well as your own political party – to blame for this. After all, it’s the Human Rights Campaign who said quote, “As the first transgender person appointed by the president, Amanda is not only eminently qualified for her new position…but she is also a trailblazer for equality.” And of course, it’s the Democrats – the party of identity politics – who made Obama’s racial makeup ominpresent in 2008. We needed to prove to the world that America could elect a black President, after all. And that hasn’t made Obama’s job any easier. The same thought must keep him up every night: “Was I elected because of color or competence?” Go back to sleep, Mr. P. – you know the answer.

Anyway, I’m happy for Amanda. But to be taken seriously, she and others will have to stop taking gender or ANY – identity, seriously. The role of government is not meant to be a bastion for employment trailblazing, but to protect us from harm, pure and simple. And for Simpson’s sake, the sooner they drop the “she’s the first” rhetoric, the better it will be for her.

And besides, being a transsexual in government is no big deal. Qaddafi broke that ground decades ago.

Tonight’s guests:

Mary Walter!

Joe Devito!

Remi Spencer!

and Ambassador John Bolton!

Plus, a VERY special edition of RedEye Robot Theatre!

Among his odder proposals: rethinking security checks that “focus attention on male bombers who may be dressing as females to avoid scrutiny [and] make transgender persons” – who might also be cross-dressing – “susceptible to increased harassment and suspicion.”

Martin Scheinin

Translation: checking for dudes who conceal bombs via cross-dressing hurts the feelings of men who cross-dress as a lifestyle choice.

Okay.

I can’t figure out if this is the worst story ever, or THE GREATEST STORY EVER.

I mean, in terms of revealing what the UN does best, this report takes the transgendered cake: simultaneously undermining the war on terror while making a mockery of common sense. When the UN isn’t trying to minimize mass murder, this mishmash of maniacs is trying to commit it themselves.

The war on terror is not a lab for social engineering. The war on terror cannot be guided by hurt feelings or the politically correct desires belonging to someone who fried his brain on Oprah. The war on terror is meant to protect innocent individuals from terror – be these innocent folks gay, straight, transgender or half man/half unicorn. If America were to take this UN report seriously, we would put everyone at risk, including the dumbasses at the UN.

But it should be no surprise that the UN would put the feelings of a cross dressing, transgendered person before the safety of millions of airline passengers. I would hope that the gay, lesbian and transgendered community would find this equally as ludicrous – and that such thinking risks the lives of everyone, including their own.

But if they don’t, I don’t care.

I’ll still be wearing my floral caftan in first class.

It has embroidered sunflowers.

And if you disagree with me, then you’re probably a racist.

Tonight we’ve got the delightful Alyson Camerata, the sharp-as-a-tack John Devore, Oderus Urangus (from Gwar, as if you need to know), and the hysterical Allen Covert!