The Force wasn’t strong enough with Sen. Chris Dodd when he took Carrie Fisher out on a date.

Fisher’s new memoir, “Shockaholic,” recalls an evening out with the Connecticut politician which briefly included a third party – Sen. Ted Kennedy.

Those who recall Dodd and Kennedy’s “Waitress Sandwich” won’t be too surprised to read what happened next.

“Senator Kennedy, seated directly across from me, looked at me with his alert, aristocratic eyes and asked me a most surprising question. ‘So,’ he said, clearly amused, ‘do you think you’ll be having sex with Chris at the end of your date?’”

According to Fisher, “Chris Dodd looked at me with an unusual grin hanging on his very flushed face.”

Fisher, being the trained actress she was, responded coolly: “Funnily enough, I won’t be having sex with Chris tonight. … No that probably won’t happen. … Thanks for asking, though.”

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UPDATE: To his credit, Mr. Roeper printed a gracious correction today. — 4/19/11

Famous film critic Richard Roeper tee’d off on Andrew Breitbart in his Sun-Times column today.  Here’s the passage:

Here’s ultraconservative activist Andrew Breitbart at a Tea Party rally in Wisconsin last Saturday, with a message for pro-union forces that had shown up:

“The Tea Party has been the most peaceful, law-abiding . . . group in the history of American protest. . . . You have no right to lecture us on civility. You have no right to lecture us on language. . . . Go to hell! No, serious. Go to hell! Go to hell! You’ve been so rude, you’re trying to divide America. . . .”

Right. And telling people to go to hell because you disagree with their politics isn’t divisive at all. That’s an instant classic of hypocrisy and a breathtaking lack of self-awareness right there.

Then again, this is the same Andrew Breitbart who went on Twitter in the hours after Ted Kennedy’s death to call Kennedy a “villain,” a “duplicitous bastard” and a “prick,” so he’s well-qualified to tell others they can’t lecture him about civility.

Roeper walked into two Breitbart traps in less than 200 words.  Can you identify what they are?

The first one is that Breitbart didn’t tell the union protesters to “go to hell” because he disagreed with their politics, but because he considered their tactics reprehensible.  Breitbart explained this in the column he posted following the rally. Simply take a look at the full context of the speech.

Here are some examples of the incivility Breitbart may have had in mind:

Note the attempt to drown out the rally with vuvuzelas and the WalkerHitler sign. (more…)

Hollywood elites and members of the upper echelon of political life have long been fascinated by the comings and goings of the Kennedy family.  In what is nothing less than an obsession, America’s “Camelot” has been a chink in the armor of many who take part in human rights’ campaigns and demand that rich people spread their wealth around, all the while remaining completely consumed with a family that demonstrated little respect for the rights of women and modeled the benefits of accumulating wealth and power.

On the other hand, Hollywood elites and members of the upper echelon of political life have long been embarrassed by President Ronald Reagan. Far from giving America another “Camelot,” he was born into a relatively poor family, and while children like those in the Kennedy family were learning which utensil to use for the various courses of their meals, a young Reagan was learning to go out into the snow and literally drag his drunk father into the house to keep him from freezing to death on a winter night.

The contrast between the Kennedy’s and Reagan was as great as that between upper white collar and lower blue collar: between a Fortune 500 executive and a brick layer. And with choices like that, elites threw their allegiance to the family (and experience) they’d most like to duplicate.

This was recently brought to mind with a vengeance when the History Channel refused to air an eight-part miniseries on the Kennedy’s, because it cast them in a bad light, but didn’t hesitate to air a special on Reagan that undercut his economic achievements as president. (To be fair, no History Channel representative said the series cast the Kennedy’s in a bad light, but that they pulled it from their lineup because of “pressure from the Kennedy’s over its depiction of the political family.”)

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A little distasteful? Possibly. As distasteful as Coakley invoking the spirit of Ted Kennedy in a failed attempt to win an election? No. If liberals want to talk Ted Kennedy… Let’s talk Ted Kennedy. Better yet, I just so happen to have managed an exclusive interview with the pale-faced powerhouse. Anderson Cooper, consider yourself scooped.

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Because he is a good and gracious man, George W. Bush worked with Ted Kennedy on No Child Left Behind. He held his hand out across the aisle (something Obama has yet to do), and brought the Senator on board to help craft and put his stamp on that piece of legislation.

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Just a couple years later, in the middle of a tough war in Iraq, Kennedy would play the scorpion to Bush’s frog when his ugly, ungrateful, unpatriotic, selfish, leftist default position would rear its ugly partisan head when he accused Bush of being a fraud who cooked up the war for personal political gain.

Today, let us celebrate the delicious irony that Kennedy the Horrible’s Senate seat is about to be occupied by a rock-ribbed conservative who believes in and campaigned on everything Kennedy the Horrible opposed. Yes, a pro-water-boarder will sit where “The Lying of the Senate” once did.  (more…)

President Obama has shown his commitment to the green movement by giving a speech which contained 100% recycled material. Here’s the deal, if you call a big special meeting and invite all the press, a bunch of Senators and Congressman… if you make Ms. Nancy fly her Gulfstream off to get a new pantsuit and a Botox shot or two and ask 300 million Americans to tune in, you should say something we haven’t heard before.

There was a lot of leftover campaign rhetoric about bringing us together. The old “I’m bipartisan as long as you are willing to agree with what I want,” was in there. We got a shot of McCain smiling haplessly like he did when he suspended his campaign to go to Washington and get the financial crisis straightened out. President Obama hit all the talking points about what is and isn’t in a piece of legislation that really isn’t even written yet. Hey, who doesn’t like a little magic? At the end there was even a little recycled Kennedy too. (more…)

Michael Moore’s “Capitalism: A Love Story” premieres at the Venice Film Festival today. Reuters has most of the details, the usual-usual from the 55-year old mega-millionaire. But buried below the usual-usual is the real story — a point of agreement with we right-wingers:

Amid the gloom, Moore detects the beginnings of a popular movement against unbridled capitalism, and believes President Barack Obama’s rise to power may bolster it.

Well, let’s hope Ted Kennedy’s enjoying his day on the slopes because Mr. Moore and I just found some common ground.

Here are the other bullet points. To save you time, the following words are not used together in describing the film: ”personal” and “responsibility” — “taxes” and “too high” — “Michael Moore” and “gave all his wealth to the federal government.”    (more…)

I caught a live tribute to Ted Kennedy on TV the other day. Family, friends, and colleagues were praising him as a champion for universal social justice. 

I started thinking about how much I’ve been hearing the word “universal” lately.

“Universal” is the “it” word, as in universal health care or “The Universe will guide me,” or “Leave it to the Universe.” 

There was a different word for it back in the day, more imposing but less confusing: God. But God is not a trendy word anymore. God is not popular, just like the Republicans. You are guilty by association with both. Even C.G. Jung was annoyed by it (the not calling God a ‘God’ part, not the Republicans). 

There was also that video tribute by Ken Burns to Ted Kennedy’s legacy.  (more…)

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As Gloucester in Henry VI beguiled like the mournful crocodile, so the political praises and tears for the late Democratic Senator from Taxachusets mouthed by his enemies have diminished and signaled the time for candor. Teddy Kennedy was a cheat, a proven liar, a shameless demagogue and a probable murderer. Those character traits were well known. But did you know he was a security risk dropped from the US Army intelligence school and a genuine traitor who offered Cold War US nuclear arms negotiation secrets to the Soviet Union if it would help the Democrats beat Ronald Reagan and further his own presidential ambitions?

That’s why my blood went to full boil a couple of days before he died when I glanced at the TV in a rural Bates motel — been staying in a lot of those lately — and saw Harvard law professor Alan Dershowitz laud the youngest Camelotian as the greatest Senator and humanitarian of all time from the deck of Geraldo Rivera’s berthed yacht in Martha’s Vineyard. Dershowitz went on to tell the FOX mustachioed-one how he had rushed to Teddy’s aid with expert legal skills “in his hour of need” after Kennedy had left his date, Mary Jo Kopechne, to die in a Chappaquiddick Island tidal pond during the summer of 1969. Dershowitz’ considerable skills aside, the fact that full media attention was diverted from Kennedy by the coming Moon landing and walk to take place two days later probably helped the Kennedy fixers regroup and save his political hide. (more…)

When a toolbag dies… How are you supposed to handle it? Are you supposed to honor them? Post-mortem, does a pedophile become the “greatest musician of all time”? Does a killer become an “American Icon”? Does death in itself wipe the slate clean, exempting the deceased from all judgment?  Or are you supposed to view them just as you did in life (be it good or bad)?

In my humble opinion… None of the above. Death is not only a passing on, but a time for everyone else to truthfully reflect on one’s life. To skim through the unsavory parts (or in Kennedy/MJ’s case, skip entire chapters all together) is to do the world a disservice. How are the rest of us shmucks supposed to learn from past mistakes if we can’t even acknowledge them to begin with?

The fact that the media decided to smooch the Kennedys’ rears through the death of Ted is appalling. Not only was there no mention of the Chappaquiddick river “incident” or his character assassination of Clarence Thomas, but the coverage was carried out in a way that assumed everyone was in agreement with the man’s misguided agenda. (more…)

FADE IN:

Biggo slips quietly into the ornate den. Seagulls can be heard amidst the distant crash of waves. Three security men stand about the room, in attentive, professional bearing.  A silver-haired, bloated old man lies on the couch

Biggo enters the room and sits in a chair beside the couch.  He smiles at the man.

Biggo – “Bunky…so wonderful to see you.”

Bunky – “And so great to see you, sir.”

Biggo - “How are you feeling, my old friend?”

Bunky – “Never better.  Feel on top of the world.”

Biggo – “Your health is my only concern.”  (more…)

This week’s Washington Times column:

With the deaths of Sen. Edward M. Kennedy and Michael Jackson, the summer of ‘09 marked the merciful ends to Camelot and Neverland, iconic American fairy tales whose story lines should have come to merciful ends long ago when their charismatic protagonists took dark and irredeemable turns.

Our country was not built to support blood dynasties or to elevate the rich and famous to a higher ethical or constitutional plain. But through the power of celebrity, Mr. Kennedy and Mr. Jackson worked the media to twist truths. They manipulated their constituencies and fans to obscure their misdeeds. They played the faithful to confer this manufactured innocence on the rest of us. And, in the end, they placed themselves above the law.

My condolences go to the Kennedy and Jackson families, who should not be stained by the sins of their kin. But there is no time like the present to ensure that those masterfully produced, over-the-top, all-star televised funerals don’t serve to canonize talented and charismatic men who failed to own up to their public wrongs and who continued to flaunt the behaviors that got them into trouble.

The result was Mr. Kennedy needn’t do more than show up for work to atone for his calculated selfishness. Without apology or contrition, Mr. Kennedy crafted a public career in which he spent taxpayers’ money – certainly not his own – to make up for his unspeakable behavior. (more…)

OBITUARY                           August 27, 2009                     Ned Rice

The whole world suffered a terrible loss yesterday with the passing from cancer of a great American icon who overcame unspeakable family tragedies and his own alcoholism to become a legendary advocate for justice.  Born to privilege in a large and wealthy Irish Catholic family, he attended elite prep schools, served in the military, and after a family member’s murder devoted the rest of his life to social causes and fighting injustice wherever he found it.  This larger-than-life character’s quick wit and compelling speaking style made him a friend to all who knew him – even those of different political beliefs-and helped advance the many causes he believed in so passionately.

May you rest in peace, Dominick Dunne.   

OTHER DEATHS YESTERDAY:  Ted Kennedy           

The question that’s been preying on my mind is who is best suited to study those strange beings known as liberals.  It strikes me that they’d be fit subjects for psychiatrists, who might be in a position to figure out why they revere the people they do — people such as Hugo Chavez, Fidel Castro, Al Gore and Ted Kennedy — men who haven’t a single notable accomplishment to their name, aside from either winning elections or eliminating them altogether.  Or perhaps it would be more appropriate for biologists to delve into the left-wing organism, and determine how it is possible that creatures without brains could have survived so long in an often hostile environment.

If you don’t believe that liberalism is a serious malady, consider that Paul Krugman of the New York Times, when addressing Sonia Sotomayor’s remark about an Hispanic woman being better qualified than a white man to be a judge, said that she was merely being entertaining.  Even if Mr. Krugman is, as his comment suggests, more easily entertained than a backward three-year-old, I have a feeling that he wasn’t nearly as forgiving when Trent Lott, on the occasion of Strom Thurmond’s 100th birthday in 2002, said it was a shame that the old Dixiecrat hadn’t been elected president in 1948. (more…)

A new television animation show will be debuting tonight on ABC, and it has the potential to be really “Goode.”

“The Goode Family” is the story of a politically correct family of environmental zealots and there are two reasons I will give this show a chance. First of all, it is created by Mike Judge. While I did not take part in the “Beavis and Butthead” craze, I was an avid fan of “King of the Hill.”

I’m still disappointed that Hank Hill and his friends are leaving after 13 seasons. In the history of television, there will never be a character as cool and incomprehensible as Boomhauer. Grandpa Cotton was also a feisty one. (more…)

Most 12-step programs start out by requiring that people understand that they’re powerless over their addiction and that only by turning their lives over to a Power greater than themselves can they be restored to sanity.  Far be it for me to suggest that I am that Power, but clearly someone has to step in and try to rescue these poor liberal souls.  Even the most harebrained among them deserves that much.

First, though, they have to acknowledge that Ted Kennedy, Nancy Pelosi, John Murtha, Dick Durbin, Charles Rangel, Harry Reid and Charles Schumer, are not moderates, but, rather, leftists with a Socialist agenda.  Furthermore, they must recognize that the New York Times, the Washington Post, the L.A. Times, CNN, the three major networks, the news magazines and the New Yorker, are not objective in their reporting of political events, and neither are Chris Matthews, Keith Olbermann and Bill Maher, in their commentary.  If these entities and individuals are not on the payroll of the DNC, they certainly should be.  They certainly put in longer hours than Howard Dean. (more…)

Four hundred years ago, Miguel Cervantes described an archetypal delirious fruitcake who wanted to change the world by turning the clock back to the idealized Utopian times that never really existed. Imagine what Cervantes would write today about the futility of his satirical effort, if he were to learn that four centuries later, a whole movement would arise that emulated his loony character and elected one of their kind as the leader of the free world.

Some conservative commentators are demonstratively wishing President Obama well. My heart admires their good intentions, but as I watched Obama’s inauguration on TV, my mind couldn’t help but ponder the possible consequences thereof. As someone coming from another country (ex-USSR) I don’t participate in racial debates nor do I want to. Being post-racial is fine by me. So let’s accept Obama’s post-racial premise, leave the issue of melanin content aside, and judge the man solely by the content of his agenda. And the more I look at Obama’s agenda the more I realize that wishing him well is like wishing luck to Don Quixote in wrecking the windmill that feeds me and my family. (more…)