Hollywood used to be the land of make-believe, but those days are fading fast.  Today, Scarlett Johansson offers debate counseling to Barack Obama (her e-mail pal), and A-listers come and go at the White House as if it’s the Beverly Hills Hotel East (if only they had a better pool scene)!  Now comes word it was Hollywood who staged the dramatic adventures of former President Bill Clinton and his trip to North Korea.

It all played out a little too perfect — a surprise last-minute swoop by Clinton into enemy territory to heroically stare down the world’s most blood-thirsty dictator and rescue two damsels in distress.  The press asked the White House how Bill Clinton became involved in the rescue of the two American women, Laura Ling and Euna Lee, trespassing into North Korea and sentenced to “10 years hard labor.”  They said they had no involvement.  Of course, Bill Clinton’s wife Hillary works for President Obama as Secretary of State; certainly, the press surmised, she must have been responsible.  The response from the State Department was that Bill Clinton was on a “private humanitarian mission.” How does one pull off such an extempore feat without government help?  Why, call a movie mogul — of course! (more…)

According to my wife, I have a tendency to state my opinion as fact.  She suggests that I begin my sentences by saying “It’s only my opinion, but…” and go on from there.  It’s my opinion, however, that people already understand that it’s my opinion and that they share it if they’re smart, or don’t, if they’re not.  Furthermore, I don’t see my main function as a communicator to convince liberals, who are notoriously as blind as bats, to see the light, but to provide my fellow conservatives with ammunition to use against left-wingers and, whenever possible, to amuse. 

Gloria Steinem

In any case, in the spirit of compromise, let us pretend that each of the following paragraphs begins “It’s only my opinion, but…” 

When Gloria Steinem, who had been lionized by the ladies of NOW for her rather dumb remark about women needing men like fish needed bicycles, finally got married at the age of 66, I thought people should have sent her greeting cards complimenting her on having belatedly grown gills.  (more…)

In all of history, so far as I’m aware, there had only been two famous tea parties.  At the first one, Samuel Adams and a few of his freedom-loving friends pitched several crates of tea into Boston Harbor.  The second was the one Lewis Carroll wrote about, a madcap affair with the March Hare, the mad Hatter and the narcoleptic Dormouse, ganging up to give Alice a hard time.    

All of that changed on the 15th of April, when a series of tea parties took place all across America.  Even I, who try to avoid crowds, attended a gathering here in the San Fernando Valley. 

If you believe the creeps in the MSM — and why would you? — we were all dues-paying members of political fringe groups, and none of us would think about leaving the house without first donning our little aluminum hats.  If you believe Janet Napolitano — and how could you? — we were not merely man-created disasters like Somali pirates and Islamic butchers, but full-fledged terrorists.  Some among us even confessed to being military veterans.  (more…)

In this episode, “NewsBusted” covers: President Obama, Hugo Chavez, Veterans, Somali Pirates, Tea Parties, ABC News, Deficits, Texas Governor Rick Perry, Colorado Blizzard, Al Gore, Phil Spector, and Madonna.

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So I think we can all admit that what happened Sunday off the African coast was kinda awesome. Of course, it’s not that I needed to be reminded that we have the most badass military alive – it’s that I like being reminded of it.

But last week, as I watched the situation unfold from Studio D (a comfy perch protected by armed security) I couldn’t help but be reminded of one simple fact that led to this event: the unarmed are always vulnerable to the armed.

And that made me realize that this ship is no different than a shopping mall or college campus – it’s a place where people congregate or work – all operating under the assumption that we live in a sane world where if you just live your life, people won’t kill you. (more…)

In a dangerous and dramatic throwback to eras long thought dead, pirates are once again actively threatening lives and property of honest seafaring men along the African coast.

The situation presents a perfect opportunity for:

A. Hollywood to produce an exciting action/adventure film based on real world events.

B. The American president to make a rousing and pointed statement on his firm support of the rule of international law on the open seas and how he’ll defend the safety of his citizens if endangered anywhere on Earth.

I predict you have a better chance of being abducted by said pirates at your local McDonald’s than you have of seeing either of the above actually occur. Why?  Both Hollywood and Obama are held hostage by the same childish, simple-minded worldview that curses all hard left art and politics (a refrain I’ve sung before and will chirp about again): “The strong are always bad. The weak are always good.” (more…)