You would think a humor publication would find plenty to mock about Barack Obama.

After all, then-Sen. Barack Obama campaigned in 2008 alongside Greek columns and promised his election would be the moment “when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal …” And let’s not forget the plethora of broken campaign promises, battalions of straw men and class warfare that have come to define the last three years.

Instead, The Onion serves up faux news stories like this:

Obama Openly Asks Nation Why on Earth He Would Want to Serve for Another Term

Yes, the media narrative regarding Obama has officially arrived at a newspaper dedicated to political satire. Liberal humorists would rather protect their own than make us laugh and speak truth to power.

PITTSBURGH—Citing three years of exhausting partisan politics, constant gridlock in Congress, and an overall feeling that the entire nation has “completely lost it,” President Barack Obama openly asked a campaign-rally crowd Tuesday why he’d want to serve another term as president of “this godforsaken country.”

“My fellow Americans, I come to you today to ask, why?” Obama said to 1,200 people gathered inside a gymnasium at Taylor Allderdice High School. “Why can’t our congressional leaders work together to create jobs? Why can’t Wall Street ever be held accountable? And most important, why on God’s green earth would I voluntarily subject myself to this nonsense for another four years?”

Didn’t Obama campaign as a non-partisan healer who would rise above congressional gridlock? And didn’t he enjoy a Democratic Congress for his first two years in office that allowed him to pass virtually anything he pleased?

Now, here come the delusional talking points that could have been uttered by Bill Press or any other reality-challenged liberal pundit.

“I have a pen and some paper right here,” Obama said Wednesday morning at a town hall meeting in Ohio. “Let’s list the pros and cons of being president. Con: There are people out there who literally want to shoot you dead. Con: We live in a country seriously considering a Newt Gingrich White House. Con: You can help 40 million Americans receive health care, sign legislation that regulates a financial system run amok, give the order to kill Osama bin Laden, help topple Muammar Qaddafi’s tyrannical regime without losing the life of one American soldier, end the war in Iraq, repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, stave off a second Great Depression, take out more than 30 top al- Qaeda leaders, and somehow everyone still calls you the next Jimmy Carter.”

And what’s the video link currently at the bottom of the story page: Did the media treat Bachmann unfairly because she’s an insane woman?

Expect much, much more of this as the presidential elections come into sharper focus.

Fans of caustic comedian Nick Di Paolo will finally get to see his act on the small screen this month.

“It’s the first time I can really be uncensored and [audiences] can see a nice chunk of me,” the Boston native says of his new Showtime special “Raw Nerve.”

Well, there were a few bits snipped away.

*Language warning*

“I mentioned Cialis in a joke, and Showtime is owned by Viacom that’s part of CBS and [the Cialis company] advertises on CBS. ‘We have to take that out,’” Di Paolo says of their reaction.

Another bit involving racial humor, which he calls “a bit too scary … but nothing outrageous,” also got sliced.

“When the DVD comes out after the broadcast will put it all back in,” he says.

Still, “Nick Di Paolo: Raw Nerve,” debuting at 9 p.m. EST April 30 on Showtime, lets the public see a rare species of Standupitus Comicus. Di Paolo is unapologetically to the right of center and was mocking President Barack Obama long before folks like Jon Stewart realized the president might not heal the world as advertised.

Di Paolo isn’t surprised his first hour-long special ended up on Showtime, not HBO.

“Their comedy hero is Bill Maher. My ideology and comedy sensibility is completely different … they never really gave me a sniff,” he says.

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I was surfing the internet yesterday and came across an article about the current state of political comedy by Paul Waldman. The article “The Joke is on Us” was posted on the far-left website “The American Prospect.” The subtitle of the site is “liberal intelligence” which is, of course, an oxymoron. That aside, the premise of Mr. Waldman’s article is that there is a dearth of humor about Barack Obama. It reminds me of when Nixon was elected and New York Times film critic Pauline Kael being shocked because only one person she knew voted for him.

Mr. Waldman postulates that this lack of Obama material is because Obama is so cool, so intelligent, and so unflappable that he is immune to being made the butt of any jokes! He actually says, “…our current political leadership isn’t all that funny.”  I assume he includes the Vice President in that statement – so apparently he and I hear different Joe Biden sound bites. I strongly doubt he has ever listened to Rush or Glen who daily skewer Obama, Reid and Pelosi.

Mr. Waldman, like Ms. Kael suffers from having a limited circle of exposure.

Before I get further into that, let me just say a big “thank you” to Mr. Waldman for reinforcing a concept that I have written about several times: Conservatives have a better sense of humor and are more willing to be self-deprecating than lefties. You see, my fellow right-wing nut jobs, in Walden World, Bush, Rush, Palin and anyone else who isn’t hastening the “Marxization” of America is a moron who should be belittled for their obvious lack of intellect. Leftist, on the other hand, never do anything foolish. All of their causes are above mocking.  Let me illustrate: (more…)

Though Thomas Jefferson never said, “Dissent is the highest form of patriotism,” the well-applied use of satire is certainly one of the highest forms of dissent.  Jonathan Swift, after all, is more remembered for his grim irony in castigating the British and Irish for their collective humanitarian failures than for any contributions to the culinary arts.

Mad Magazine reigns supreme in creating a satirical crucible through which all subjects, social, cultural, political, artistic and philosophical typically pass.  The difference between valid satire and mere mockery being, of course, the elements of truth contained therein, it is sometimes difficult to rule out former as as being buried so deeply in the latter as to be inconsequential, particularly during political campaigns.  The editors of Mad would likely say that if such a line is drawn, they erase it, but nonetheless credibility rests on facts in satirical endeavors, humor being in the manner of delivery.  (more…)

President Obama has made the rehabilitation of the reputation of our country one of his top priorities. He wants to be the Sally Field of the international politics and know that other nations like us!  They really, really like us. To achieve that end he has apologized for just about every action of the Bush Administration and yet at the UN this past week several of the people the President has been trying to win over still seemed a bit distant. His new BFF Hugo Chavez did give him a nice “smells like hope” compliment, but several other still haven’t gotten the message.

President of all Iranians — both living and dead in the streets — Ahmadinejad still wants to build a few nukes even though Mr. Obama has told him not to. Colonel Qaddhafi, or Gaddahfi or Khaddafi, or Kaddafy or however you spell it, isn’t on board the love train either.

This has not deterred President Obama! Moving swiftly, he said he will name a new Apology Czar, rumored to be either Jimmy Carter or Maxine Waters and set a schedule for more apologies to settle all past wrongs of the United States. (more…)

Ed. note: many thanks to Charles Glasser for alerting me to this incredible business opportunity]

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THE UNITED STATES BUREAU OF JOLLITY AND HUMOR ADMINISTRATION
EVERETT DIRKSEN FEDERAL MERRIMENT CENTER
3000 JAMES EARL CARTER PARKWAY SOUTH
WASHINGTON, DC

FORM US/BJHA-1106(d) : AARA Budget Procurement Code LOL-431[ROFL]

APPLICATION FOR HUMOR CONSULTANT / CONTRACTOR

This space for official use

SYNOPSIS:

The purpose of this announcement is to seek qualified private contractors to provide amusement and humor-related services to career employees within a wide range of federal agencies, including but not limited to the Treasury Department, Department of Education, The US Census Bureau, and USDA Mohair Subsidization Board. Winning applicant(s) shall perform presentation program demonstrating mirth as defined herein and in BJHA document (k)670-110, “FY 2009 Federal Levity Handbook.” In particular, guidelines specify services rendered by applicants shall be funny “ha-ha,” not funny “peculiar.” 

STATEMENT OF PURPOSE: (more…)

As all the politicians, left and right, run around feigning indignation at the bonuses paid to a few AIG executives I am reminded of the scene in the movie “Casablanca” when Captain Renault closes down Rick’s Café American. As his deputies empty the casino in the back room he exclaims with stunned surprise, “I’m shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here!” He says this just as one of Sam’s employees brings him his winnings.

I am not sure what makes me angrier, that absolutely bogus attitude or their overwhelming incompetence, but that’s not what I want to write about today. I’m not going to write about a lot of stuff here. I am not going to write about fact that Chris Dodd wrote the rule that allowed these bonuses and then in perfect Clintonese quasi denied it when he said, “I can’t point a finger at someone who was responsible for putting those dates in. I can tell you this much, when my language left the Senate, it did not include it. When it came back, it did.” Then when confronted with his lie, he owned up to it. I won’t spend time on the fact he took a ton of campaign dough from AIG, headquartered in his state. (more…)

The Onion can’t find anything funny about President Barack Obama or his presidency yet. But it quickly jumped on the Democratic Talking Points bandwagon this week with a sour assault on talk show giant Rush Limbaugh.

The humor publication has been tap dancing wildly to avoid any articles that could so much as pierce the skin of the new president. But they took off the gloves when it came time to mock Limbaugh in the newest edition, now available everywhere.

To say the “Rush Limbaugh Returns” infographic isn’t funny is to be kind. It’s cruel and assumes both the worst about Limbaugh and his legion of fans. Humor needs to be based on a kernel of truth to work, but only a rabid left winger would think the material here is knee slapper stuff.

Here’s a sample of the faux incendiary comments Limbaugh has made, according to the publication:

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