He was really concerned that with President Barack Obama’s dismal approval ratings the Republican primaries would become a winner-take-all contest, with the popular Christie making it all the way to the White House.

Louis believes that political satire is the finest form of the comedic arts, and he has seen it die twice over the last two decades. When the Monica Lewinsky sex scandal broke, every hack in America became a political comic just by appending Bill Clinton to their favorite oral sex gag. As we moved into the new millennium, comics who specialized in blonde jokes could call themselves political just by substituting President George W. Bush into the punchline.

With this new administration, political humor became very tricky, and only a few comics will attempt to make fun of the President. Heck, even the guys who did those “What if a Brother ever got into the White House?” routines were forced to write some original material or abandon the political arena altogether. Louis believes that the political edge of his club is part of what has kept him afloat three years into a recession.

But with the buzz surrounding Christie, there was suddenly a resurgence in hack political comedy. Late night hosts, who have been incapable of finding anything funny about a pair of big ears for the past three years, have stumbled on a new way to market fat-based humor.

This week, David Letterman speculated that Cristie was the only candidate you could view from space (gosh, Dave, no; “when he’d sit around the White House, he’d sit AROUND the White House” … or, “New Jersey would lose a zip code”).

For full disclosure, I have been guilty of the occasional fat reference. Usually though, it’s directed at Michael Moore, who happens to be the world’s fattest Communist (and takes more than his “fair share” of the pie, whether it be economic or boysenberry). I lamely excuse these jokes because the underlying theme is hypocrisy — the same reason why others might make fun of gay Republicans or Al Gore’s private jet.

So what will the comics do now they won’t have Christie to make fun of? Letterman took off running with the “Rick Perry’s Racist Ranch” angle; it seems that a painted rock at a hunting camp is enough to make him the token racist of this election cycle. Fortunately, there are a total of fourteen other Republican candidates to choose from, including a couple that will even allow jokes about race and gender (though oddly enough, racism and sexism are only derogatory when the candidate is a Democrat).

Personally, I think America is ready for a fat President. I’m tired of seeing Presidents jogging (shirtless leaders are so Eastern European). After three years of being told by Michelle Obama that we shouldn’t be eating like the First Family, I’d love to have a President who has more important things in mind than his daily carb count. We’re in a depression; who really cares about the President’s health?

Heck, that’s why we have a Vice President — to allow the President a vice.

To say there’s nothing funny about this President is elevating him to the level of a deity, the way leaders are looked at in some third world totalitarian state. I’m quite certain that North Koreans cannot see anything funny about Kim Jong, Il, although the majority of the world thinks he is as entertaining as a circus midget. Ditto for Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

Paul Waldman’s piece is just another apology for the inability of the American Humor Industry to construct a proper satire on this President; a topic as ripe for satire as November apples. It’s such a shame, too.  Epic ineptitude has been a comedic staple since before the Three Stooges, all the way through to the era of Tim Allen. When Moe Larry and Curly are accidently mistaken for plumbers, you just know there’s going to be a flood.

This is unconscionable. From the days of JFK right up to the Bush Administration, I have enjoyed watching comedians mock the occupant of the White House with wild abandon. Open satire has always been the hallmark of a free society. A president that can’t be mocked is no longer a leader of a free nation

As Jeffrey pointed out, there are a lot of comics who have been fairly adept at coming up with Obama humor; they’re just not breaking into the mainstream. Those of us who enjoy talk radio might not even recognize the hands-off policy that the major comedy outlets have instituted for this fragile presidency; because the satirists of talk radio have been entertaining countless millions with their Obama comedy.

Paul Shanklin, nailed his voice years ago on the Rush Limbaugh Show. In some local radio markets, (like the Chris Baker Show in Houston and the Twin Cities & Jerry Agar in Toronto) comedian Tim Wilkins  does phone-ins as the President with an impression so accurate you would think it was real. Since these comics have never been on TV, elitist J-school bloggers probably don’t realize they’re already part of the national zeitgeist.

The obvious reason is that the majority of the talent coordinators for the late night talk shows and the cable networks are liberals. They are simply not going to greenlight a comic who fails to amuse them, and they see nothing funny about the current president. Remember, Fred Armisen was reprimanded with a CNN fact check for attempting what SNL viewers had been enjoying since the Ford era, so others have been lax to repeat his blasphemous act.

In the article, Waldman claims that maybe this president is just too cool. This isn’t the first time the allegation was made, David Letterman used to giggle about how cool the guy was too. (“Man, is he cool!”). Of course, anybody who has seen Obama golf, bowl ,or throw a baseball knows this is just preposterous. He can’t even dance. He is nerdy, and un-athletic with big ears and a girlish walk. Calling him “cool” is as unintentionally racist as the white fraternity notion that all black guys can play basketball

Which is the biggest reason for their scant ability to mock the president, and little tolerance for people who do. There is a residual shame in the white community leftover from the days of Amos and Andy, that has made it extremely difficult for anyone to go after a black president. Modern tradition in comedy holds that White Comics make fun of White People, and Black Comics make fun of White People.

Conservatives are labeled as racist for simply opposing health care, so if the Conservatives find anything funny about the President, you just know it’s going to be dismissed as hate. Meanwhile, shows like Evan Sayet’s Right to Laugh, and my own Stand-Ups for America are capitalizing on the inability of mainstream comedy to touch the President.

Which should stand as a warning to the mainstream comedy industry: If you continue to refrain from supporting the opinions held by over 50% of America, a segment  of the population that is growing larger with every recession vacation, you will eventually marginalize yourself out of business. 

Just ask the New York Times.

For eight very long minutes Jon Stewart spoofs Glenn Beck. Good luck slogging through the last half. As my mind wandered near the end two questions suddenly came to me: Why won’t Michelle Pfeiffer take my calls and other than Keith Olbermann, who’s more spoof-able nowadays than Jon Stewart? Consider how much comedy gold there is to grab hold of:

1. He’s desperately in love with himself.

2. His audience will laugh at anything (as this overlong skit proves).

3. Whenever the show’s energy starts to die, Stewart reliably resorts to Plan B: Much VOLUME followed by Funny Face.

4. He’s a coward who hides his Leftist in-the-tankness behind that tired ”I’m just a clown” schtick. Hell, even Olbermann has the guts to step in the arena and take a hit. As does Glenn Beck, for that matter.

5. When he does do a serious interview and the guest gets the better of him, Stewart goes for the cheap joke to win the audience back.

Jon Stewart is a Palace Guard not a satirist.

In my book, that makes him fair game.

A lot has been written lately about how comedy writers are having a hard time finding humor in President Obama. “He’s just too competent,” they say.

The answer is obvious. They, on the left, are having trouble making fun of the left.

But what about us? We have a bigger problem. How are we supposed to make fun of the left?

When I get together for coffee with my fellow pragmatic, reality based, sort-of-right-wing comedy writers (many of whom still speak in hushed tones here in Manhattan, as they are still in the closet), I find I have nothing to poke fun at as I scan the morning papers. I used to relish tearing apart an op-ed from the Times or a column from Slate in front of my buddies, but lately I am left wanting. There is nothing funny anymore. One cannot parody a parody.

Here, let’s try. Take a look at this Sally Quinn article in The Washington Post, in which she “defends” Michelle Obama, after saying that “She has come under attack for exposing her arms.” (Has she? Did Sally Quinn just make that up? Could you find me someone who has done that?)

She goes on:

“Michelle Obama’s arms, we determined, were transformational. Her arms are representative of a new kind of woman: young, strong, vigorous, intelligent, accomplished, sexual, powerful, embracing and, most of all, loving.

“They are toned and muscular, burnished and beautiful. That has to be threatening to some. For some men, often, a strong woman makes them feel diminished.”

This is not The Onion. This is real. This is a real live person who makes their living writing for a newspaper. How could you lampoon this? Where would you go from here?

Oh, I guess here:

“She also has a husband who is facing more crises than any president we have had in more than half a century. He needs her support, and she is giving him that in an intelligent and thoughtful way. It’s those arms again: By going around to various agencies and talking about what the administration wants to do, she is, in her own way, embracing America.”

Do you hear a sound? Yes, it’s me bashing my head against the table in Starbucks as I read that. How in holy hell am I supposed to objectively joke about people who are in such a fog of sycophancy?

The woman hasn’t left the smallest finger-hold for a satirist to grab hold of–it’s complete in its idiocy. Am I being lazy? Read the whole article. Is there even one sentence you could add to it to make it more ridiculous?

Other than be completely embarrassed for this woman, I don’t know what else I can do. Nothing is funny anymore. I give up.