1) It’s a silent movie 2) in black and white 3) with no-name lead actors, 4) no special effects, 5) a title that oozes pretension, 6) … and it’s French! And now the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has to come along and drive the final nail in the coffin, nominating it for 10 Oscars.

Add up all these ingredients and you have the perfect recipe for the dullest, snootiest movie ever, right? That’s the trouble with selling people on “The Artist.”

Normal, non-pretentious people, that is, who don’t think sitting through a black and white movie is a badge of honor, like an artistic Purple Heart (the snob’s version of “taking one for the team”: watching a long, boring movie so you can tell your friends about it).

And that title?  It should have been called “The Comedian.” Or “The Entertainer.” Anything but “The Artist” (that’s “Artiste” in French — mon Dieu!).

How does one convince normal people to see “The Artist?” What if I told you that it scored a 97 percent “fresh” rating on Rotten Tomatoes?  Nah?

Critics say it is the most likely nominee to take home the golden statuette. Bookies picked it as the odds-on favorite.

Still not interested?

That’s too bad. Because snooty title and lack of sound aside, it’s easily the best movie of the year — and the most entertaining.

Yes, a silent, black-and-white, French movie is more entertaining than the biggest special-effects blockbusters of the year. Even though it hearkens back to a style of film more than 80 years out of date, “The Artist” is the freshest, most original movie experience you are likely to have.

Funny thing is, what makes “The Artist” such a breath of fresh air isn’t the lack of sound or color.  It’s the absence of cynicism.

Snarky cynicism has taken hold of our culture like a face-hugger from the “Alien” franchise, planting embryos of despair and nihilism in our bodies to fester and grow until they emerge from our chests (and the chest-bursters’ faces are plastered with smirks reminiscent of Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert).

“The Artist” is a time machine to a simpler era — before cynicism had permeated the mainstream, when the movies didn’t try to tear down the values of their audiences or sucker-punch them with political messages from out of left field.

“The Artist” trades the contemporary entertainer’s jaded smirk for an infectious grin. That’s the simple secret to its success.  Its only agenda is to entertain. How revolutionary!

It does so by revealing to us the human spirit in all its elastic glory — its low points, but mostly its peaks. There is an underlying theme of man contending with changing technology, which couldn’t be more timely in the Age of the iPod/iPhone/iPad/iCloud, and thankfully it doesn’t conclude on a Luddite note.

One wonders whether the critics would have accepted “The Artist’s” old-fashioned virtues without the silent-movie gimmick. The art-house movie trappings gave the critics “permission” to embrace it. Set such a story in modern-day Hollywood, with contemporary spoken dialogue and in color, and they’d snort in derision.

But by pleasing the critics, “The Artist’s” creators risked alienating mainstream audiences — which would be a shame, since it is aimed straight at the sweet-spot of mainstream America.

The film is set in late ’20s Hollywood, the waning days of the silent-movie era, the plot a mash-up of “A Star is Born” and “Singin’ in the Rain.” The main character is George Valentin, a popular silent-movie star, portrayed by the amazingly expressive and captivating Jean Dujardin (justly favored to win this year’s Best Actor Oscar), a beefier, more comedic version of Gene Kelly.

Along comes the aptly named Peppy Miller (Berenice Bejo), a sassy wannabe actress with a big crush on the charming (and charmed) Valentin. So you see, it’s a love story as well as a comedy. Or rather, it’s two love stories: one between Valentin and Peppy Miller, and the other between them both and Hollywood. The supporting cast includes actors more familiar to American audiences such as Penelope Miller, James Cromwell, and John Goodman (who would have made a fabulous silent-era comedian).

Of course, the native languages of the various actors are irrelevant, since the movie has no spoken dialogue (though there is one fascinating sequence that uses actual sound in a very creative way). The jaunty musical soundtrack picks up the slack, and it’s such a delight that it helps you forget there’s no spoken dialogue.

Instead, the actors must express themselves through their faces, actions, and situations. It takes tremendous talent and charm to pull this off, and the cast have more than enough of each to rivet your attention for 100 minutes. I normally despise dancing in movies (second only to silence), but the brief bouts of tap-dancing in “The Artist” are so invigorating and so integral to the story that I actually looked forward to them.

I urge everyone not to wait until it comes out on home video but to watch this movie in a theater with an audience. I guarantee that it is the most unusual movie-going experience you will ever enjoy — better than 3D, dare I say. To watch the actors on the big screen enthrall us without any dialogue – no sound except for that charming movie music – well, I repeat, it has to be experienced for yourself, and in a theater.

As the movie opens, there’s a delicious anticipation in the quiet theater filled with other quiet people. Funny stuff starts happening, and you’re waiting to see, er, hear who will be the first to break the silence and laugh out loud. When a human voice finally shatters that quiet with a chuckle or a guffaw, there is a sense of relief all around.  And as if a dam burst, everyone is soon laughing uproariously together.

Without the frenzy of special effects on the screen, and without loud dialogue and explosions to mask their own obnoxiousness, The Artist almost shames audience members into refraining from talking out loud or studying their smart phones. The hush makes you feel like you’re in a church rather than a strip-mall multiplex. In its own orbit, at least, “The Artist” has single-handedly revived the vanishing joy of communal movie-watching.

I can’t wait to buy it on Blu-ray, but I feel sorry for anyone who watches “The Artist” for the first time at home. Without an audience and with all of the distractions of modern life, you simply won’t get the full benefit of the experience.

I have a theory about “The Artist” The lead actor is a popular French star. I imagine that he wanted to become a star in America. But he was told that his English isn’t good enough and his accent too thick (listen to him in interviews and you can sense that he lacks confidence in his English, though it’s not as bad as he seems to think it is).

How to share his enormous talent with American audiences without speaking English well? Why, make a silent comedy, that’s how! I don’t have any evidence to support this. But it’s my theory. You can share it if you want.

It’s odd that it took a team of French filmmakers to reintroduce America to the pleasures of old-fashioned Hollywood movies. Here’s hoping that Hollywood thanks them on Oscar night.

Maybe, but it’s hard to see why.

There was a time when the Academy Awards were an institution, where the nation devoured the nominations and joined together around their TV sets to watch the show itself.  It was fun – the whole family watched.  But that time is rapidly receding in the rear-view mirror of American culture.

It’s more than the fact that there are, literally, other things to watch while in the past the other two networks bowed to the inevitable and counter-programmed with “Mannix” reruns.  But the ratings are now in freefall.  We don’t care about Oscar because Oscar stopped caring about us.

Let’s look at the Best Picture nominees:  “The Artist,” “The Descendants,” “Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close,” “Hugo,” “Midnight in Paris,” “The Help,” “Moneyball,” “War Horse” and “The Tree of Life.” For many of these, that’s the first time anyone has looked at them – only three of these movies are even nearly within even the loosest definition of a “hit.”

“The Help,” which has its fans but struck many as another movie about plucky white folks rescuing blacks, thereby making its nomination a certainty, made about $170 million. “Moneyball” and “War Horse” made about $75 and $72 million respectively. And the rest of the nominees? They’re coming soon to one of those supermarket bargain DVD bins near you.

Hollywood defaults to the darlings of the urban elite – I’m doubting “The Tree of Life’s” mopey, soul-searching spiritual journey through time and space and Sean Penn’s soul did a lot of business outside of hipster-infested coastal cities where neo-beatnik audiences in skinny jeans snapped their fingers in approval of the groovy insights Terrance Malick flashed on screen in the place traditionally filled with things like ”a plot,” “action” and “a point.”

The presence of Tom Hanks and its high-falutin’ literary heritage are the only things selling “Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close” – but America isn’t buying.  It’s made just $12 million. I guess 9/11-related journeys of self-discovery are a hard sell. And I guess the only people who don’t get that live in Hollywood.

There’s Woody Allen’s “Midnight in Paris.” Well, if it’s Paris there’s no reason why he couldn’t have somehow incorporated Roman Polanski into it too and made it the ultimate Hollywood tribute to elite-approved and excused sexual exploiters.

“The Descendants” had a big downside – smug lefty George Clooney in the role of  “Sensitive George Clooney” – and one huge upside – it was written by the hilarious Jim Rash, best known as the Dean on “Community.” “Hugo” was generally seen as a pleasant diversion. But neither was a huge hit – probably 5-8 million out of 310 million Americans saw each of them. And more importantly, neither has sent out the cultural shockwaves of truly great films – they’re just movies, and not a hugely memorable ones.

Where are the classics, the movies that in future years we will stumble upon on AMC on Sunday afternoons and be unable to look away?  These aren’t “Best Pictures” – they’re “Meh Pictures.”

Now, “The Artist” has enjoyed raves but, at $12 million, made little impact at the box office. It seems like a pleasant enough film, but a black and white, silent movie about old Hollywood isn’t a Best Picture. It’s a novelty, and one that’s only been noticed at all because it flatters Hollywood by being about Hollywood.

Maybe “Harry Potter and the Damn Thing Finally Ends, Part 3″ was not the best picture of the year, but did the Academy really expand the number of Best Picture nominees just so that another session of cinematic onanism from Malick could stagger onto the list?

It’s not supposed to be a dry exercise in film criticism – where’s the showmanship, the pizazz that Hollywood used to deliver? This isn’t a Best Picture nominee roster; it’s a laundry list of mediocre movies no one will remember in six months. Sheesh, there’s not even anything amazingly, awesomely awful enough to get our pulses pounding.  3-6 Mafia, where are you!

So, will Americans gather together in their living rooms on Oscar night, with partisans of “The Descendants” shouting down those favoring “Moneyball?” Yeah, sure. And Jonah Hill deserved to be nominated over the great Albert Brooks.

Hollywood is out of touch and disconnected from its audience on every level. Its theaters are miserable, its content dull or worse, its politics offensive and the ticket price for it all outrageous. The idea of a movie star is dying, and it appears the Oscar is on life support.

What’s better than a veteran comedian ditching the laughs for some low down, dirty behavior on screen. Alas, Brooks came up short this morning when the Oscar nominations were announced. Better luck next year, Albert.

But Brooks decided to turn the snub into comedy fodder. He raced to his Twitter account to fire off these missives:

Brooks’ reaction is so much better than the pained “happy” expressions we see on Oscar night by those who miss out on that golden statuette.

‘SCORPION KING 3′ ON BLU-RAY AND DVD JAN 10

In a dangerous, action-packed battle to regain his glory and reclaim the empire, Mathayus’s journey is steeped in intrigue, sorcery and romance, fueling this new film that spawned from the billion-dollar The Mummy film franchise. The Scorpion King 3: Battle for Redemption tops the series once again, featuring even more of the heart-stopping action, mind-bending stunts and astonishing plot twists that have earned the series millions of fans the world over. The film’s spectacular fight scenes, choreographed by renowned stunt experts Kawee “Seng” Sirikanerut (Ongbok, Lara Croft Tomb Raider: Cradle of Civilization) and Supoj “Jimmy” Khaowwong (Batman Begins), are showcased within enchanting ancient palaces, against a backdrop of breathtaking desert vistas.

The Scorpion King 3: Battle for Redemption stars Golden Globe® winner Ron Perlman (“Sons of Anarchy,” Hellboy II: The Golden Army) as Horus, the powerful King of Egypt and Billy Zane (The Roommate, Titanic) as the villainous Talus.  Directed by Roel Reiné, the film also stars Victor Webster (“Castle,” Surrogates) as Mathayus and UFC star Kimbo Slice (Locked Down), Bostin Christopher (Unbreakable); six-time WWE World Champion Dave Bautista (House of the Rising Sun), and Temeura Morrison (Green Lantern, Stars Wars: Episode 3 — Revenge of the Sith), Selina Lo (Shanghai) and Krystal Vee (Streetfighter: The Legend of Chin-Li).

Clips here, here, here, and here.

UNSEEN SCENES: DELETED SEQUENCE FROM JOHN WAYNE’S ‘MCQ’

John Wayne, along with Paul Newman and Frank Sinatra, turned down the role of “Dirty” Harry Callahan that made Clint Eastwood a superstar, and in the hopes of making up for it, Duke starred in two urban actioners, “McQ” (1974) and “Brannigan” (1975), the latter of which I still remember seeing in a theatre with my dad.

It’s a testament to Wayne’s starpower that both films remain so watchable. The scripts are only okay (though memorable moments abound) and the star is obviously a little long in the tooth to be playing an active duty police officer. But watchable they are.

THE TRAILER FOR THE 84TH ACADEMY AWARDS

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences released the trailer for the 84th Academy Awards in conjunction with Funny Or Die. The trailer features host Billy Crystal and cameo appearances by Robin Williams, Josh Duhamel, Megan Fox, William Fichtner and Vinnie Jones.

“We wanted to try something a little bit different this year instead of a traditional, clip-based piece,” said Academy Chief Marketing Officer Christina Kounelias. “The trailer has a fun twist that conveys how excited everyone is to have Billy back.”

HBO AND WARNERS GETS STUPID WITH NETFLIX: WON’T STREAM, WON’T SELL DVDS

Childish:

[I]n the past Netflix was able to buy HBO DVDs directly from the company, and in bulk, at a discounted rate. But, starting in 2012, that is no longer an option. To stock new HBO shows – such as Boardwalk Empire and Game of Thrones, which are soon being released on disc – Netflix will have to buy them from a third party at a higher rate.

So, basically, the consumer won’t notice. They can add those shows to their Netflix queue and they’ll arrive when they arrive because Netflix will need to buy them at any cost. The only real people who’ll notice are the accountants at Netflix who’ll have to pay a little more. The important news here is the symbolic line in the sand HBO is drawing with Netflix. HBO knows Netflix wants their content and Netflix has been very wary that HBO is becoming an important competitor. It seems it’s now official.

Do you think the HBO shows are that important? Do you stream them on HBO Go, watch them on DVR or not at all? Is Netflix suffering without HBO?

Of course, HBO has every right to do this but it’s counter-productive. Netflix helps to spread their brand and can work like a giant commercial for their original programming. Throw Streaming a few seasons and if people get addicted they will either subscribe to HBO in order to avoid waiting another year or so to see the latest seasons, or they will run out and buy the DVD sets that aren’t streaming.

Hollywood always fights the future, and the end result is always the same. They discover the future opens entirely new markets to them but that during the fight they lost a ton of money they could’ve made by not playing defense.

In related news: Warner Bros. Doubles Delay on Netflix, Redbox DVD Rentals to 56 Days

Oh noes, now we have to wait two months to see bad movies.

MATTHEW VAUGHN IN TALKS WITH POTENTIAL ‘KICK-ASS 2′ WRITER/DIRECTOR

Love the original.

AMANDA SEYFRIED IS RELUCTANT PORN SUPERSTAR ‘LOVELACE,’ NOW SHOOTING

I’m tired of watching women debase themselves onscreen and even more tired of women debasing themselves on screen to portray women debasing themselves onscreen.

Now that “progressive” women act exactly like the debauched fantasies of men they used to call sexist pigs, no one is happier than sexist pigs.

“Take off your clothes, feminist, it’s art.”

“Liberated” suckers.

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LAST NIGHT’S SCREENING

The Closer: We’re in the middle of season five and enjoyed what you might call a reverse sucker punch last night. *spoilers coming*. The entire episodes revolves around our protagonist, Brenda Leigh (Kyra Sedgwick), fighting a Texas police officer over which one will win the right to prosecute a serial killer. Much is made of the Texas death penalty, none of it good, and for about a half-hour you sit there rolling your eyes at the all-too obvious political subtext and outright Texas-bashing.

In the end, Brenda wins the day and this awful killer is saved from those crude Texans by liberal California justice. Then, in a very satisfying and realistic twist, Brenda gets a look at photograph after photograph of the murderer’s innocent young victims. Immediately, she sees the light and ships the scumbag off to Texas for the justice he deserves.

Love this show.

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SCOTTDS’ EPIC LINKTACULAR

KLAVAN: THIS EPIC DORITOS COMMERCIAL DESERVES YOUR VOTE

VAN HALEN TO KICK OFF TOUR, ALBUM IN FEBRUARY … EARLY RAVE

‘SHERLOCK HOLMES’ STAR BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH CAST AS ‘STAR TREK’ SEQUEL VILLAIN

MARTIN FREEMAN IS BILBO BAGGINS IN A NEW PHOTO FROM ‘THE HOBBIT‘

WHAT COULD GO WRONG? ABC PICKS UP PRESIDENTIAL RACE DRAMA PILOT FROM CREATOR ROLAND EMMERICH

CW GREENLIGHTS MYSTERY SERIES ‘CULT’ FROM ‘FARSCAPE’ CREATOR ROCKNE S. O’BANNON

ANOTHER FILM CRITIC BITES THE DUST

FOR YOU SCREENWRITERS: YOUR 2012 WRITING NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS

FIRST LOOK: JEREMY RENNER AS AARON CROSS IN ‘THE BOURNE LEGACY’

13 ‘SIMPSONS’ JOKES THAT ACTUALLY CAME TRUE

‘AMERICAN HORROR STORY’ SEASON 2 DETAILS REVEALED: WHAT HAPPENS NEXT

BELA LUGOSI AND HIS STEAMER TRUNK

WHAT WERE THE 15 BIGGEST FLOPS OF 2011?

10 UNFORGETTABLE TEASER TRAILERS

CREATIVITY AND THE RISK OF RESENTING YOUR AUDIENCE

THE 10 MOST INTENSE COUNTDOWNS IN MOVIES

THE BIG BAD SWAP: THE PROBLEM OF REPLACED MUSIC

THE STORY OF DAVID LYNCH AND HIS UNPRODUCED SCRIPT ‘RONNIE ROCKET‘

THE ALLURE OF HORRIBLE PROTAGONISTS

5 TV SHOWS THAT DIDN’T GET THE CHANCE THEY DESERVED

HOLLYWOOD AND THE YEAR THAT WAS: 1976

10 AWESOME POP CULTURE ANIMAL SIDEKICKS

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CLASSIC PICK FOR SATURDAY,  JANUARY 7

TCM:

8:00 PM  EST: City Lights (1931) –  In this silent film, the Little Tramp tries to help a blind flower seller to see again. Dir: Charles Chaplin Cast:  Charlie Chaplin, Virginia Cherrill, Florence Lee. BW-87 mins, TV-G.

If the closing scene doesn’t get you, you’re a sociopath.

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Please send comments, suggestions and tips to jnolte@breitbart.com or Twitter @NolteNC.

In other words, had Weinstein’s movie been snubbed altogether, I think people would remember it more fondly than they do. If I recall correctly, no one was complaining much that the movie was nominated, but the win immediately changed the perception of the movie.

I loved a lot of movies released in 1998, but only one of them was nominated for Best Picture. It’s a very tough year for me to pick a favorite. The nominees:

“Shakespeare in Love” – Only saw it once, and I liked it. Costume dramas really ain’t my thing, but costume comedies? Well, that’s…wait, I don’t like them much either. But I guess this one’s alright.

“Elizabeth” – See above. Never seen it.

“Life is Beautiful” – Roberto Benigni winning Best Actor for this remains one of the great whiffs in Academy history.

“Saving Private Ryan” - The invasion sequence alone remains worth the price of admission.

“The Thin Red Line” – For my money, this is a pretentious mess. I’ve got a buddy who says it’s his favorite movie. I say he’ s trying to seem smart. But what do I know? I’m the guy who would have nominated…

“There’s Something About Mary” - Stalker? Big time.

“The Big Lebowski” - Am I wrong? Am I wrong? No, you’re not wrong, Walter, you’re just an assh*le.

“Out of Sight” - You don’t have an extra clip I can use, do you?

“Rushmore” - Never in my wildest imagination did I ever dream I would have sons like this.

“Saving Private Ryan” - The Statue of Liberty is kaput. That’s disconcerting.

This is really an absolute squeaker. Why? Partially, it’s because I love all of these movies so much. But mostly, it’s because I’m stupid.

Peter and Bobby Farrelly established themselves with “Dumb & Dumber,” then made the box office bust “Kingpin,” which deservedly found an audience on video. No one expected much from their third movie. Leading man Ben Stiller was not yet a star or a box office draw, but he had honed the nervous stammering act of his in pretty solid comedies like “Flirting With Disaster” and turned in hilarious supporting work in “Happy Gilmore.” In 1998, he had a breakout year, appearing in the underrated “Zero Effect” and the misanthropic “Your Friends & Neighbors.”

Released in the middle of July, less than a week after “Lethal Weapon 4″ and just before “The Mask of Zorro,” the Farrelly’s comedy was a genuine word-of-mouth sleeper hit. It hovered in the lower half of the top five until the end of August, when it finally crept up to number 2 at the box office. First week of September, it claimed the number one spot — a full seven weeks after it debuted at number 4.

Its performance is part of the reason I pick it over the more obvious choices on the Academy’s list and my own list. I worked in a theatre at the time, and I witnessed the slow build. By September, older couples were coming to see the movie — and were loving it. The Farrellys had done something amazing; they had made a vulgar comedy that crossed over to people who would never see a vulgar comedy, much less embrace it.

The key to their success is the unconventional screenplay, and the cast.

Ben Stiller and Cameron Diaz have been more than overexposed by now, but in 1998, they seemed like a breath of fresh air. I don’t think I’ve ever rooted for a dude to get the girl more than I did in “There’s Something About Mary.” No one has ever deserved a girl who was so out of his league in the history of movies.

This is set up from the very beginning and then pounded into our heads, sometimes with subtlety and sometimes with the force of a sledgehammer to the nuts. The Farrellys make Ted (Stiller) go through hell to land dreamgirl Mary (Diaz); it’s a journey during which no good deed goes unpunished for Ted, and our heart sinks with his about a dozen times over the course of the movie. Consider:

- He comes to the aid of her mentally challenged baseball loving brother Warren (W. Earl Brown – fantastic performance) and almost gets his ass kicked for his trouble. He later gives the gargantuan Warren a piggy back ride.

- He shows up to pick up Mary for the prom and is told by her father Charlie (Keith David? Genius casting.) that Mary already went to prom with Woogie — a Mr. Everybody’s All American type from a different high school. Ted slumps, frowns, but what makes it UNBEARABLE is that he not only pretends that he’s not hurt by the jilting, but that he seems to think he deserves to be jilted. Of course, Mary’s dad is “just f*cking with” Ted, and Mary is home the whole time ready to go to prom with Ted.

- Ted offers Warren a baseball but inadvertently touches the big man’s ear; Warren goes psycho, tears the room apart and delivers a belly to belly suplex on Ted atop a coffee table. I love the  tension in the aftermath of this moment. Ted’s freaked out, Mary goes upstairs with Sheila, her hot mom (Markie Post), to fix her dress, and Charlie consoles Warren and barks at Ted. Ted defends himself, Charlie responds: “Are you yelling at me? Are you yelling at me in my own damn house?” Ted insists he’s not. Awesome. But the capper is when Ted asks where the bathroom is and Charlie answers, “Grrrrrrrrrrr!”

- The bathroom scene. One of the two most talked about scenes in the movie. “Franks & Beans!” Once again, a misconstrued situation — this time only a look, a glance, a harmless peek! — leads Ted into an uncomfortable situation. Perhaps the most uncomfortable situation in movie history. Sheila sprays Bactene on his nuts, a cop shows up (“What? The f*ck?” he exclaims), a fireman — pretty soon the bathroom’s packed with people and Warren is in the hallway screaming, “Franks & Beans.” If you don’t exit this scene with pee-stained pants from laughing yourself wet, there’s something wrong with you. More importantly, if you don’t exit this scene hoping Ted gets Mary, there’s something wrong with your soul.

- On Ted’s day off, he helps his boss’s brother move. Not his boss. Not his brother. His boss’s brother, who happens to be a crusty, mean, profane man in a wheelchair. Genius line: when Ted complains that a gigantic armoire is heavy, the guy in the wheelchair seethes, “Heavy?! What I wouldn’t give to know what heavy feels like, you insensitive prick!”

- He also, out of the goodness of his heart, offers a serial killer a ride, takes a fish hook to the mouth, and is made to dress up in a superhero costume. Nothing in the movie would have been as funny without our empathy for Ted. In “Mary,” the Farrelly Brothers dodge a landmine. She likes golf. She likes to drink beer and watch football. She likes to talk about football. In essence, she’s too perfect, and women should have rooted against her. But, using subtlety and a sledgehammer, the Farrellys make her vulnerable… to stalkers. She’s got so many stalkers she had to change her name. The only reason that Ted ever got a chance to go to the prom with her is because her high school boyfriend Woogie “got weird.” Like a stalker.

Ultimately, it’s my pick because from a pure story standpoint, it’s the most difficult of any of nominees (actual and in Cam-Land) to pull off — a comedy about stalkers that’s actually really sweet despite relentless vulgarity. Its unconventional-but-still-mainstream-and-not-weird structure (the romantic leads are apart for a good chunk of the movie — ask Gore Verbinski how hard it is to pull that off) makes it an even more difficult movie to pull off. But ultimately, it’s the constant barrage of jokes both verbal and visual, great characters and strong performances that make it my favorite movie of 1998.

Fellow actor Seth Rogen is sticking up for his “Pineapple Express” co-star, albeit belatedly.

Rogen, most recently seen in “50/50,” contends it’s the producers’ fault when an Oscar host stumbles. And, in the case of Franco’s ill-fated pairing with Anne Hathaway last year, no one could have saved the show from itself, according to comments from Rogen published at MovieLine:

I think when you agree to do something like that, you put a certain amount of faith in the institution, hoping that they’ll take care of you, and I feel like they didn’t [take care of him]. Why hire James Franco and then give him Billy Crystal’s monologue? It was like, “Oh, we’ll hire these young hosts and then we’ll just do the same sh*t we do every f*cking year.” Which to me was really odd. I think they just approached it wrong. They didn’t think it through, and they were way underprepared. I think they hung him out to dry. So I wouldn’t do it unless they hired some better writers [laughs].

Rogen deserves credit for sticking up for a pal, but his logic is ultimately flawed.

Oscar hosts are given a set amount of material they likely can’t change, but they still are responsible for creating a sense of comfort and ease. Billy Crystal isn’t the best Oscar host in recent memory because of his killer punch lines. He’s great because he lets us know he’ll be there to guide us through the long, and often torturous, ceremony. We’re in good hands with Crystal, period.

Franco looked alternately bored and bemused, and that’s hardly the best way to approach the gig.

Most importantly, if Franco didn’t think he could work within the Oscar format he should have politely declined the gig. After all, the actor is pretty busy these days and is hardly wanting for work.

Now, can the movie inspired by his brush with death pull off an Oscar upset?

“50/50,” the serio-comedy starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt in the role inspired by Reiser, didn’t obliterate the box office competition following its Sept. 2011 debut. To date, it’s rake in a modest $34 million, not too shabby for a film revolving around cancer but hardly blockbuster material. And the film’s 93 percent “fresh” rating at RottenTomatoes.com also bodes well for its awards season chances.

But the movie doesn’t have that Oscar feel, and while that’s no critique on the film itself it could matter when it comes time to tally up votes.

Let’s face it. Oscar voters have a very set group of rules when analyzing a film’s chances for awards. Does it feature Meryl Streep, Dame Judi Dench or Clint Eastwood? Is it a biopic of a Very Important Person? Did the film make a splash at Sundance/Cannes? Is there a timely, left-of-center political bent to the proceedings?

Here’s one question no Oscar voter is asking? Does the film co-star Seth Rogen, and does he smoke pot in it?

Will Rogen’s presence, and the atypical approach to the subject of cancer, hurt the movie? It’s a shame if it does, since “50/50″ bullies past the usual mawkish subplots to give us a refreshingly honest look at a young man confronting cancer.

That Reiser not only survived by lived to write “50/50″ makes the film all the more rewarding.

The film’s best Oscar chances may rest with Anjelica Huston’s turn as the lead character’s distraught mother. Huston, who previously won an Oscar for “Prizzi’s Honor,” could use one more meaty scene to help lock up a nomination. But her work here transcends typical parental behavior, making her both a fierce protector of her son and a wounded heart herself.

The move returned Crystal, arguably the best Oscar host of the modern era, back where he belongs. And the imbroglio following former show producer Brett Ratner’s vile anti-gay comments seemed forgotten, if but for a moment.

Turns out the public may not be eager to forget that the dust up ever happened.

A new poll commissioned by The Hollywood Reporter reveals viewers wish Murphy were still hosting the event.

Market research firm Penn Schoen Berland surveyed 510 awards-show viewers aged 13 to 59 and compared the results against similar surveys about Murphy and 2011 hosts James Franco and Anne Hathaway.

In head-to-head competition, Murphy is the choice of 58 percent of viewers, compared with Crystal’s 42 percent … and African-Americans are more than 2½ times less likely to watch Crystal.

One note of consequence from the pollster – Crystal’s appeal “is significantly older, female and conservative.”

Crystal is no Charlton Heston, or even Jon Voight. The comedian doesn’t insult conservatives or their values while hosting the Oscar telecast. He simply puts on a grand show and lets the movies share the spotlight.

That means somber biographies – “J. Edgar,” “The Iron Lady,” and “My Week with Marilyn” – will compete with Steven Spielberg’s “War Horse” and a few other films that practically scream, “Vote for me!”

So where does that leave “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part 2?”

The eighth and final film in the ridiculously popular franchise hits Blu-ray and DVD shelves this week, a timely reminder that it deserves serious consideration in the biggest Academy Award category, Best Picture.

Normally, popcorn fare is excluded from most Oscar chatter. Even “The Dark Knight,” a film which delighted critics and audiences alike, couldn’t nab a Best Picture nod.

But this season is shaping up to be a particularly weak one for Best Picture contenders.

Recent films like “Moneyball” and “J. Edgar” earned mixed to solid reviews at best, while the early buzz on director Alexander Payne’s “The Descendants” is solid, not terrific. “The Iron Lady’s” released date just got bumped to late-late December, not a sign of confidence from the studio. “The Help” might slide into a Best Picture slot simply by being both topical and uplifting, but the film’s 75 percent “Fresh” rating at RottenTomatoes.com hardly screams artistic excellence.

And spare us the talk that Woody Allen’s overrated “Midnight in Paris” deserves Oscar consideration. Has the bar been set so low for Allen that even his mediocre fare fires up award chatter?

“Deathly Hallows – Part 2″ is a terrific film, both a stunning visual achievement and an emotionally satisfying coda to a complicated film franchise. Oscar voters often nominate films that mean something, or that cap an historic film achievement. Just consider the Oscar coronation for “The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King,” the third film in that triumphant fantasy franchise.

The final “Harry Potter” film deserves that kind of emotional voting, but it shouldn’t need it. It’s good enough as is, an epic tale of good versus evil that proved long-running franchises can end on the highest of notes.

Crystal agreed to host the annual Oscars telecast today, making it the ninth time he’ll emcee film’s biggest night.

Hosting the Oscars may be the toughest gig in Hollywood – next to doing PR for Charlie Sheen – but Crystal makes it look easy. He even accepted the assignment in style, Tweeting a funny line about why he said yes:

“Am doing the Oscars so the young woman in the pharmacy will stop asking my name when I pick up my prescriptions,” Crystal said in a tweet, confirmed by an Academy spokeswoman. “Looking forward to the show,” he said.

Good start, indeed. Maybe if he’s on his game we’ll forget all about why he got the job in the first place.