I have a few questions on my mind and, judging by the questions asked by the likes of George Stephanopoulos, David Letterman and the mainstream media, if I don’t ask them, there’s a very good chance that nobody else will. 

First off, I’d like to know why the 535 members of Congress have to congregate in Washington, D.C.  As Dick Morris and Eileen McGann made perfectly clear in “Fleeced,” they don’t do very much in the nation’s capitol that they couldn’t do just as well or just as badly if they stayed home in their bathrobes.  Half the time, the sessions are devoted to naming post offices and other equally earth-shattering events.  (more…)

People have it all wrong about Richard Heene.  He’s not the perpetrator of a poorly-executed hoax, but a victim, a victim of America’s callous disregard for those who suffer from the silent plague that is Media Absence Disorder (MAD).

Sadly, the dead white males who imposed the Constitution on America enumerated only negative rights that limit the power of the government over its citizens.  But if you squint your eyes and look beyond obstacles like the plain text, lurking in there somewhere behind the penumbras and emanations is the positive right of every American to be a TV star.  Those with MAD are not cretins to be shunned but civil rights visionaries at the edge of a new frontier of governmental largess and probably a lot of profitable litigation.

It’s obvious that American society has failed the Heene family.  After he and his brood’s triumphant appearances on Wife Swap, Heene was left media-deficient and was forced to feed his addiction with crude YouTube videos.  In one, he speculated that Hilary Clinton is a shape-shifting space reptile, which would be totally cool if true.  In another, he claimed that he spoke to aliens at a local fast food restaurant, which is actually pretty typical, at least at Southern California fast food joints.

This sad state of affairs was a direct result of the deep, black emptiness in Heene’s life that could never be filled by superficial things like work, religion or family.  Like all MAD-men, he craves, needs, must have the validation that only comes from having his mug flashing across America’s television screens.  He not only wants his MTV, he has to have it.  And we owe it to him. (more…)

Stage Right explains, “There is a problem with the American Theatre.” But American street theatre, if judging from the The Taxpayers Clearing House Prize Patrol, offers no similar cause for concern. No budget? No problem. Conscript Senators Chuck Schumer and Olympia Snowe as unwilling players in your drama. Use AIG’s headquarters and the U.S. Capitol as a set. Rain dollar bills upon the Secretary of the Treasury as if he were a stripper. That’s just what a bunch of twentysomething amateur thesbians did in their hilarious guerrilla theater YouTube short, The Taxpayers Clearing House Prize Patrol.