So, on this rainy evening, I do what I often do: wonder what Nicholas Kristof is concerned about.

Thankfully, I didn’t have to wonder, for long.

The New York Times writer was on Morning Joe – the tv show, not the hand massager – discussing today’s hearings looking at radicalism among American Muslims.

There, he said he had a problem with the hearing, because it makes us look like big meanies.

He said, “I’m sure that at mosques around this country, especially the more radical mosques, this is going to be seen as one more evidence that people are picking on us.”

Now, I gotta give Kristof credit, because he said what’s on the minds of all our nation’s spineless media.

And that is: protecting people is far less important than protecting feelings.

Which, first of all, is rude to Muslims. See, I think the average Muslim can appreciate concerns about terrorism. Tip-toeing around them is offensive, for it implies they aren’t civilized enough to deal with it. I think it’s pretty obvious they would embrace the conversation, rather than be excluded because of their religion.

And as for the “more radical mosques” that Kristof worries about – their feelings don’t rate. They already want us dead. Kristof seems to be saying, the best way to deal with a bully is to mollify him.

But how?

Should we visit these radical mosques with gift baskets?

I wouldn’t know what to put in them. “World’s greatest jihadist” coffee mugs?

Anyway, Newsbusters points out that at least Kristoff admits there are “radical mosques,” something the anti-hearing protesters would never do. I know that’s not much to be happy about, but it’s nice Kristof can see the enemy.

And his concern for their feelings is just plain adorable!

And if you disagree with me, you’re a racist homophobe.

Tonight:

Remi Spencer

Anthony Cumia

Karl Zahn

So over in England (a country), some gay activists want to cancel a gay pride parade because it will cause “community tension,” between gays and Muslims.

The march was a response to anti-gay stickers placed around town, but some worry this event could hurt Muslim feelings.

Here’s part of a letter from a group of concerned types, who claim the march will “oppress other marginalized groups.”

“We want both homophobia and Islamophobia addressed as a collective problem and not feed one against the other, we do not recognise these as distinct categories.”

So, let’s rewind: homophobia and Islamophobia are the same thing.

Okay..I gotta ask: do you think they would also group homophobia and anti-Christian attacks as one and the same? Do they see crude jokes aimed at Mormons as no different than anti-gay jokes?

No way.

So why are they embracing Muslims as marginalized brethren – and not others?

Well, for one, it’s HARDER to protest around people who “really” hate you.

So better to stay out of Islam’s way, and target the gentler dissenters, like white pudgy Christians – the people who remind you of dad, and don’t want you dead.

And so here we have fear, masked as tolerance, forcing gays into contortions even circus performers wouldn’t try.

I mean, how can the gay left defend a religion whose practitioners want gays punished? They’re joining hands with folks who, in other more extreme lands, might cut off theirs.

Anyway, let me remind you that I hate all parades, so I don’t mind if it’s cancelled.

Marching to celebrate something you “are,” as opposed to ” have achieved,” seems odd. And later, I often wake up naked in a bush.

And if you disagree with me, you’re a racist homophobe.

Tonight,

Jill Dobson

Paul Mecurio

Dana Vachon.

 Great show!

Apparently, Hollywood thinks a character called “Captain America” is too gauche for foreigners to handle. And so he’s to go nameless in such places as Russia, Ukraine, and South Korea. Once again, Hollywood shows that it’s ashamed of America, its traditions, and culture.

This film already raised eyebrows for patriots when the director said that his Captain America wouldn’t be that into America.  Last July, director Joe Johnston claimed that the Captain America in his film would not be a “jingoistic American flag-waver.” Johnston’s anti-American sentiment foreshadows the dropping of the character’s name from the title for overseas distribution.

I’d dare say that the new costume they designed for the captain of that unmentionable nation was created in an effort to mute the essential American-ness of its traditional comic book design, too. Not that the uniform looks ridiculous by any means. In fact, it edges toward the practical instead of the generally outlandish nature of most comic book costumes (including the original Cappy’s costume).

But the thing is the original Captain America costume is unmistakably a replication of the U.S. flag. The costume in the new movie goes out of its way to mute that effect. Where the original comic book costuming had many stripes dancing vertically across the abs, the new one obviates the effect of the stripes part of the good old stars and stripes. Further, the new costume has various leather straps and gears fastened about it, hiding the stripe effect even more so. On top of that, the red, white, and blue colors are more muted, darker than the original, more brightly colored scheme of the Cappy uniform. The uniform is also replete with pads emulating a 1940s era football uniform effect. These pads also help mute the American-ness of the design giving the eye much more to look at than the more blatantly flag-like costume of the original Captain America.

All of this is likely done on purpose so that foreign audiences can be less “insulted” that a hero would dare wear elements of the American flag upon his person.

Of course, it’s all marketing, we understand. Just as it was marketing when the 2006 re-boot film of “Superman” dispensed with the “American way” part of the line “truth, justice, and the American way.” Just as the 2007 “G.I. Joe” initially intended to excise the fact that G.I. Joe was an American soldier until protests made them back track.

It isn’t just the movies taking artistic license with comic book characters, either. Even the comic books themselves these days are turning out a far more Politically Correct (PC) product. For instance, last year Archie Comics introduced an openly gay character to Riverdale. Also in 2010, the Captain America comic book got into the anti-American action by having an issue where Tea Partiers were presented as a danger to America. Marvel later apologized for the attack on Tea Partiers. Finally, only a month ago, DC Comics introduced a PC hero in the Batman series that is unmistakable for its effort to avoid any real interpretation of world politics by introducing a new character in France that is serving under the tutelage of the American Batman. That new character was termed the “French savior” and is a Muslim immigrant from Algeria. Despite all the riots and troubles that radical Islam is causing France, DC chose to make a Muslim the “French savior.”

Sadly, our comic book heroes have been undergoing a PC-ing for years making them less heroic and more liberal every year. This new Captain America film is just one more effort in that campaign.

While we at Big Hollywood are quick to point out that celebrities can use their soapbox to do some good, but each time they open their mouth to tell us how to behave, they run the risk of losing the magic of their screen persona.  So to help remind you who spoke up on behalf of “all people” this year, here is a rundown of the 10 most asshat celebrity comments of 2010:

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10.  When Whoopi Goldberg went on O’Reilly to discuss her reason for walking off The View (i.e. plug her new book Is It Just Me?: Or is it nuts out there?”) rather than defend her position about the world having a “Muslim problem,” the two also touched on the issue of whether a Jewish kid or a Muslim kid is more likely to be bullied in the US because of his religion.  O’Reilly had the facts but like most good, Hollywood liberals, Whoopi just said, “I don’t believe it.”

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9. Mel Gibson finds himself on the list for having a long history of racist rants, drunk or not. He gets an extra asshat mention for not checking for a wire when being honest in the face of a Russian.

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8. When Hollywood leftists cannibalize one another as if they were a bunch of Troglodytes forced into an out of control Kubrick film, it sends a spool-of-drool to my mouth like a Pavlovian dog. In April, Sigourney Weaver served up this little dish about her showbiz sister Kathryn Bigelow while in Brazil promoting Pocahontas… I mean Avatar.  “Jim didn’t have breasts, and I think that was the reason,” she told told Folha Online, a Brazilian news site. “He should have taken home that Oscar.”

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7. After apologizing profusely throughout 2010 for grabbing Taylor Swift’s spotlight at the 2009 Grammys, Kanye West did an about face and complained that, after he dissed her onstage, he was disappointed that Taylor Swift “didn’t have my back.” Why would she have his back? He’s the one who humiliated her!

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6. After doing what all celebrity women who can’t maintain a healthy relationship do–buy a child–Sheryl Crow got back up on perch to tell Katie Couric about it for Glamour magazine last June. After Crow complained in the interview that Americans have become too blasé about politics and that nobody has taken to the streets to cause “a riot or a revolution,” Couric correctly pointed to the Tea Party as an example of modern day activism.

“What do you think of the Tea Party movement? Because that is the specific sort of group of people who would say we’re out there, we’re getting involved in the process…” asked Katie Couric.

“I appreciate the fact that those people are out there and that they are fired up,” responded Crow, before adding that Tea Partiers “haven’t educated themselves…they’re just pissed off.”

“My main concern is that [the Tea Party is] really fear-based,” said Crow, a cancer survivor and environmental activist. “What’s coming out of the Tea Party most often, especially if you go onto YouTube, and you see some of the interviews with these people who really don’t even know what the issues are, they’re just swept up in the fear of it and the anger of it.”

“They’re not sure what they’re angry at,” Crow continued. “[T]hey don’t understand what’s happening on Wall Street.”

This from a woman who every year tours the country in custom buses so people can hear music inspired by Eric Clapton, Don Henley, Owen Wilson, and Lance Armstrong.

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5. Gwyneth Paltrow said that losing her baby weight after the birth of her second child, son Moses, in 2006, was “by far the hardest thing I’ve ever done,” the Huffington Post reported on July 11. “It was really hanging on. It was not easy…but I really was seeing results so it motivated me to just work through it,” Paltrow said. She added that her celebrity trainer, Tracy Anderson, helped her lose the weight by having her work out for two hours a day. Two hours a day!  I don’t know any mother with small children that have time or energy to work out for two hours a day.  Oh, but it gets worse.  Paltrow explains: “Every woman can make time–every woman–and you can do it with your baby in the room. There have been countless times where I’ve worked out with my kids crawling around all over the place. You just make it work, and if it’s important to you, it’ll be important to them.

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4. As reported by Hollywoodland, Ben Affleck on NPR said, “The banks shouldn’t — people shouldn’t make such a giant profit off just moving money back and forth. And CEOs’ pay shouldn’t be 200 times the average worker. It used to be nine times.”

NPR didn’t ask whether that sentiment about overpayment counts for movie stars that make $250,000 for simply showing up at a casino grand opening.

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3. When not backing homophobic and misogynistic rappers on their latest “art” and winning awards from the Gay and Lesbian Community, Pink is thinking about beating her unborn child.  “It’s a great idea to spank your children!” And she’s not just talking about a light tap on the butt, either: “I think parents need to beat the crap out of their kids,” the 31-year-old pop star said to Access Hollywood. “Yes, I think the whole spanking and how it’s all gotten P.C. is just for the birds,” says Pink. Apparently Pink herself got paddled on the butt a time or two as a child by her dad. “Oh, he put me through a wall,” says Pink. “It’s the only reason I’m still here. It’s the only reason I’m still alive.” Thanks Dad.

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2. In her self-made YouTube PSA, Kathy Griffin reaches out to young gay teens the way tobacco companies hope today’s youth will bum a “fag,” light up, and pay their future bills. In it, Kathy sympathizes with gay kids stuck in a Bible-belt closet because of evil Republicans practicing trickle-down homophobia. Because Hollywood knows what’s best for everyone, Kathy also reminds us of how wrong Prop. 8 was and how the courts must overturn it. Laws only apply when they favor Hollywood’s agenda; when the law doesn’t and sides with the majority, Hollywood bullies everyone with a differing view. Days later, hosting VH1 Divas Salute the Troops, Griffin decided to bully Bristol Palin about here weight on “Dancing with the Stars,” shedding a light of shame on all young women who struggle with weight issues and don’t have access to personal trainers.

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1. Watching The Joy Behar Show on Headline News is akin to watching dead tuna dry in the sun–and the only thing that squashes this tuna melt more is when her guest is the man who inspired the term “jumping the shark.” I’m not sure what tank Henry Winkler’s been swimming in since he starred in that hit movie Heroes in 1977, but I wish he’d stayed there. Winkler, on the show to promote his children’s book that deals with dyslexia, felt the need to debase an American family that’s done nothing to him other than be different. In the clip, Winkler says this about Sarah Palin and her family: “I do know that she is the most articulate person in her family.” He and Joy then go to criticize Palin for living the good life they have enjoyed for many years.

Who are your Hollywood Asshats of 2010?

First the reality. The country of France is having serious domestic problems between its immigrant Muslim community and those natural-born, European Frenchmen. Immigrants have been rampaging across the country for several years now. Clashes between police and large groups of rioting Muslim youth have wreaked havoc on the Gallic nation. Violence is all too common — it is woefully common for hundreds of cars to be lit afire in these riots and dozens of arrests to be made. It has the country split and frightened.

It has gotten so bad in France that in some parts of its cities, those parts controlled by marauding gangs of Muslim youths, whites never enter for fear of their lives. Not only that but not even police dare enter these areas. This dangerous situation does not seem anywhere near being solved. In fact, it’s just getting worse.

Now for the fantasy: enter The Batman.

DC Comics recently launched a series called “Batman Incorporated.” Essentially, Bruce Wayne (well-known as Batman’s alter ego to comics fans) is cruising the world setting up a “Batman” for major cities across the globe. These Batman figures, though, will not be vigilantes. They will be sanctioned by whatever local police force is in charge of the area in which the new Batman is operating. In the case of Detective Comics number 12 (Part one) and Batman Annual number 28 (Part two), Bruce Wayne has come to Paris, France to find a “French savior.”

The story reveals to us a cult-like group that is assassinating France’s fringe political figures. The cult’s goal is to cause unrest and riots to be led by the murdered political figure’s followers. This group hypnotizes its members to kill and then to commit suicide so that the cult cannot be discovered.

First a “popular” French union activist “with ties to the French Communist Party” is murdered. Next the leader of a “break-away Neo-Nazi Party” is killed. Then Batman discovers that a “minor diplomat” from Saudi Arabia is targeted. Batman tries to stop the assassination but is too late.

Batman turns to a man that he helped police arrest earlier in part one. When first encountered the young man was dressed in a skin-tight, black costume and sported a face mask. Batman arrested him when this man tried to involve himself in some rioting. Batman didn’t know the young masked man was actually trying to stop the riot but later learns of his good intentions. Consequently the Dark Knight decides to put this man to work to help stop the cult that is assassinating French political figures and causing riots.

In the course of this story Batman, aka Bruce Wayne, decides that this man should become the French representative of Batman Incorporated. As Wayne styles the man, he’ll be the “French savior.” He ends up calling himself Nightrunner.

So what’s wrong with all this? Only that it is completely absurd and so badly misleads people from any understanding of why riots are really going on in France that it almost qualifies as a crime itself.

You see, DC Comics has decided that the “French savior,” the French Batman is to be a Muslim immigrant. The character’s name is Bilal Asselah and he is an Algerian Sunni Muslim and an immigrant that is physically fit and adept at gymnastic sport Parkour. Apparently Batman couldn’t find any actual Frenchman to be the “French savior.”

The whole situation is a misreading of what ails France. The truth is, neither communist Union members nor “Neo-Nazi” Parties are causing riots in France. Muslims are. Yet DC Comics is absurdly making a Muslim immigrant the “French savior”? This is PCism at its worst. Not only that but it is pretty condescending to France, too. France is a proud nation. Yet DC Comics has made a foreigner the “French savior.” This will not sit well with many Frenchmen, for sure. Nor should it.

As DC told the tale of this character’s origin, it badly downplays the seriousness of the actual racial tension in France. In essence, all you get from the story is that “they hate us, and we hate them.” There is no attempt at all to explain the real underlying problem. The true cause of the riots and violence between Frenchmen of European stock and that of immigrant Muslim stock is glossed over as if it doesn’t even exist. DC Comics makes the whole problem as simplistic as mere racism as if that is all there is to it ignoring the fact that Islam is the single most important factor in the strife.

Unfortunately, readers of Batman will not be helped to understand what troubles are really besetting France. In this age when Muslim youths are terrorizing the entire country, heck in this age of international Muslim terrorism assaulting the whole world, Batman’s readers will be confused by what is really going on in the world. Through it all DC makes a Muslim in France a hero when French Muslims are at the center of some of the worst violence in the country’s recent memory.

But it isn’t surprising for DC, a comic book company that has a character whose creator based it on “corporate greed.” Nor is it surprising in an industry where tea party members are made the enemy of super heroes. For the character based on “corporate greed” look up DC’s Larfleeze character and see the Marvel comic Captain America issue 602 where The Captain makes Tea Partiers into an enemy to America (Marvel later apologized). For that matter, check out the words of the director of the new 2011 Captain America movie who said that his Captain America won’t be a big “flag waver.” Imagine that. Captain America not being that into America.

These few examples aren’t the only ones, either. Among many other instances, last April the venerable Archie Comics announced they were adding a gay character and back in 2007 movie makers announced that they intended to remove all mentions of the U.S. military from G.I. Joe (they later relented to a degree).

It all adds up to a PCing of the American comic book industry that has been going on for far too long.

In the above video, Stewart takes some shots at NPR for firing Williams, but it all feels like an excuse to revisit his Fox News obsession and desire to smear the station as some kind of Big Scary Monster of Right-Wing Intolerance, as though one cable news channel has anywhere near the combined power of CBS, ABC, PBS, CNN, NBC, MSNBC, oh and, Comedy Central.

The closing skit with the “scary” Muslim man and Black man pretty much calls Williams and Bill O’Reilly a couple of racists for their individual comments that started all of this — what O’Reilly said that caused Joy and Whoopi to cluck-cluck-cluck off the “View” stage and what got Williams fired from NPR.

Here’s the moral of Stewart’s comedy:

“If they’re not going to make a distinction between Muslims and extremists, then why should I take the time to distinguish between decent white people and racists?”

It’s all so preciously sensitive and PC it just makes you want to run out and hug a baby seal.

Could there be a bigger disturbance in the satiric-force than when you have supposed comedians assuming the roles of our nation’s PC-Enforcers?  Unless, of course, the target is Sarah Palin’s Down Syndrome baby, then the sensitivity badge is quickly removed and the rubber hose comes out. 

Kinda makes your skin crawl, though, doesn’t it? The only boundaries Stewart and his ilk are pushing anymore are those in the department of sensitivity and the chilling of free speech. You see, it’s not enough that we all know what Bill O’Reilly meant — no, he had better say it or Stewart will call him a racist. Same with Juan Williams for daring to speak his fears out loud.

That sound you hear is Lenny Bruce spinning in his grave.

As you already know, Islamophobia is defined as a fear of Muslims. So Islamophobia-phobia is a real fear of a perceived fear.

So, who are the culprits behind the disease?

Jackasses in the media.

To quote a perceptive tweet by a dude whose handle is “politics of fear:”

“How can the media say were Islamophobic, when we all died from avian/swine flu?”

That’s it, nutshell-wise.

The fact is, there is no group more quick to judge, more prone to exaggeration or sensationalism than the media. They are the haymakers of hysteria. The litany of scares propagated by the media is so long, that if I were to list them, you would fall asleep, dropping your bong shaped like the head of Robert Bork.

And, as always: anything the press says will decimate us, won’t. Ever.

So screw them when they accuse us of hysteria. They’ve done this before with McCarthyism, jingoism, and tomboyism (a totally legitimate fear of tomboys).

Here’s why they do it: when hacks realize that a story has sped right past them – they must cover their asses. So rather than play catch up, they turn on you. Hence, by missing the mosque story, they make the story about opponents of the mosque.

And so, like ABC, you go undercover to a mosque protest – maybe to scrounge up evidence that Islamofear is sweeping the nation.

When, really, the only thing sweeping the nation these days are sweepers. Without them, our floors would be covered with dust, crumbs, chunky pieces of fractured bone and clumps of scalp.

But maybe that’s just my house.

And if you disagree with me, you’re a racist islamophobic homophobe.

This is what the Tweeter tweeted:

Amish saying stop Muslims?1. What are you doing on the computer? 2. That’s not very Amish 3. Shouldn’t you be making butter?

Later, that tweet was deleted.

Which is a shame, because it didn’t have to go. See, the Mosque folks don’t understand that here in America you can make fun of any religion – yes, even the Amish – and angry followers won’t throw acid in your face or behead you in front of a tripod. And, as primitive as the Amish are, they won’t even stone you to death for adultery. But the tweeting Park51 can be forgiven: maybe they thought the Amish might head out from Lancaster County and fly a buggy straight into their building. Don’t worry, “Parky:” they wouldn’t get the horses through the Lincoln Tunnel.

Anyhoo, that’s my point. We all make Amish jokes, because we can. They are nice people. The worst thing they ever did was deal meth – and in parts of rural PA, that’s almost considered a civic duty (I kid the rural PA-ers).

Meanwhile, after I made my proposal to open a gay Muslim bar next to the mosque – I was warned by friends, coworkers and deli managers that I’d end up dead. Who knew so many people hated the Pet Shop Boys?

But it is certainly rich for the folks behind the mosque to poke fun of a religion for eschewing modern convenience. After all, the Amish are beyond advanced when compared to the most ardent followers of Islam. Remember, the Amish do not demand that the world to return to a period when its prophet lived – a time when more people died during childbirth than from old age.

But hey – at least these Mosque-eteers at Park51 can make fun of the Amish.

Maybe later, they can make fun of themselves.

And if you disagree with me, you’re a racist homophobe who stole my pants.

Tonight:

Bill Hemmer!

Juliet Huddy!

Stephen Kruiser!

But even though I hate outer space, I get its importance. Unlike President Obama, who thinks NASA is a shinier version of Epcot Center.

According to a piece by Byron York, Obama ordered NASA administrator Charles Bolden to focus on three goals – inspire brats to study science and math, expand international relations (which only works when hookers are involved), and help Muslims “feel good about their historic contribution to science, math, and engineering”. These goals, as Hot Air notes – have nothing to do with space.

But they are spacey.

And so our President has put feelings before frontiers. Which is a mistake, because you can’t inspire anyone – kids or Muslims – without actually doing something. And if space exploration is no longer about space exploration, what exactly is it?

Crap.

But you know what it should be about?

Blowing up crap. Fact is, we love movies like Star Wars, Star Trek and Star Jones – not for their emotion, but for their annihilation. In short: we need to weaponize space. Personally, I can’t think of a better way to excite a kid than giving him the chance to obliterate Pandora.

I hate those people.

As for Muslims, outreach failed. New polls show that Muslim nations hate us just as much as before – so Obama’s outstretched hand has left them limp. Fact is, other countries – Muslim or otherwise – respect power, and see appeasement as a weakness. If you want them to like us, build something that will scare the shit out of them.

And, it’s going to happen whether we do it or not. So we might as well be first.

And if you disagree with me, you’re a racist homophobe who hates soccer.

Tonight:

Amy Schumer!

Congressman Thaddeus McCotter!

and the Old Spice Man is back: Isaiah Mustafa!

Go ahead and file this in your “unlikely” drawer:

You may have heard that Robin Hood stole from the rich and gave to the poor, but that was just liberal media propaganda. This Robin is no socialist bandit practicing freelance wealth redistribution, but rather a manly libertarian rebel striking out against high taxes and a big government scheme to trample the ancient liberties of property owners and provincial nobles. Don’t tread on him!

So is “Robin Hood” one big medieval tea party? Kind of…

As you probably know, the Breitbart team frequents these Tea Party rallies, and we’ve yet to come across the “disillusioned war veteran just back from a distant, violent campaign against Muslims” tea-partier that Russell Crowe allegedly portrays in this year’s “Robin Hood.”  Scott neglects to mention this inconvenient theme in his review.

We’ll report back and let you know if Robin Hood more closely resembles a libertarian rebel, as Scott suggests, a forward-thinking, spread-the-wealth around type of revolutionary, or somewhere in between.  We have our suspicions what he will be, but according to Scott, the films does pick on the French.

If it does turn out Robin Hood has a libertarian streak, it would be interesting to ask Team “Robin Hood” when exactly the disillusioned vet theme was added to the script.  Call us cynical, but it’s easy to picture the project’s higher-ups meeting on the script only to agree it’s good, but just a little too Tea Party.  Maybe this PTSD-vet-just-back-from-the-War-on-Terrorism theme was in the script from day one, or maybe it was injected as an eleventh hour save, but either way, it certainly has the makings of a textbook sucker punch.