In a park across the road from where we lived, businesses and community organizations would provide a firework display on the 4th of July. It was a big show, with massive fireworks that kissed the sky then opened up like colorful umbrellas before falling down like rain.

—–

The display was timed with music that played on an AM or FM channel (I can’t remember which). Whatever the channel, it was made known to everyone in the town beforehand so that car stereos and portable radios could be tuned in.

On the evening of the 4th, the family would all gather. My mom and dad, my brother and sister, my aunts, uncles, and cousins, all in my front yard, watching the fireworks explode and anticipating the finale, which was always Lee Greenwood’s “God Bless the U.S.A.”

The fireworks were set up so that they reached a crescendo as the song did. And I can vividly remember how my heart pounded when Greenwood’s voice coincided with the explosions. I would put my hand over my heart as he sang, and I always mouthed the words “where at least I know I’m free” along with him.

I was only 10 or 11 years old at the time, but I was so proud to be an American.

My heart still pounds when I hear Greenwood’s song, and I’m still thankful to be free.

MR. SMIRNOV:  Hello everybodies! Who we gots on the phones here?

MR. KIETH:  Toby Keith. Built Ford Tough.

MR. SMIRNOV:  Hokay, buddy!

MRS. BURGE:  Beverly Burge, Ocelot, Iowa. I do scrapbooking.

OAK RIDGE BOYS:  Howdy! We’re the Oak Ridge Boys!

MR. SMIRNOV:  Alrights, Branson in da house!

MR. HANEY:  Lester Haney, Sepulpa, Oklahoma.

MR. SMIRNOV:  Hey everybodies, I don’ts know if you see Lester Haney’s work, but he does some of the most beautiful chainsaw stump sculptures Yakov ever sees.

MR. HANEY:  Thank you.

MR. SMIRNOV:  I know you gots a gallery opening tonights at the I-35 Truck Haven in Wynnewood, so let’s move on. Who else joining us?

MRS. COHEN:    Sylvia Cohen, Boca Raton Florida. Driftwood and sea shell arrangements.

MS. CZARNOSKI:  Rhonda Czarnoski, McKeesport, PA. Victorian dolls.

MR. NEWTON:  Wayne Newton, entertainer, Las Vegas Nevada.

MR. SMIRNOV:  Tanks very much for yous to be here Wayne!

MR. NEWTON:  Danke schoene. Darling, danke schoen. thank you foooor all the joy and pain. Picture showwwwws, second balcony, was the place we’d meet, second seat, go Dutch treat, you were sweet…

MR. SMIRNOV:  Hokay, that’s enough Wayne. Who else?

MR. GREENWOOD: Lee Greenwood, and I’m proud to be in Bransonnnnn, where at least I know I’m free….

MR. SMIRNOV:  And the buffets are half price before 6! Who else?

MR. SCHMITKE:  Cody Schmitke. I’m a conceptual garden gnome-ist in New Braunfels, Texas.

MR. TABUCHI:  I am Shoji! I am much honor to also be in Branson America, Smirnov-san!

BALDKNOBBERS: Howdy y’all! We’re the Baldknobbers Jamboree!  Nyuk!

MR. SMIRNOV:  Hokay, it looks like we gots everybodies on the telephone.

OAK RIDGE BOYS:  Elvira, dohmp dohmp dohmp Elvira…

MR. SMIRNOV:  Oak Ridge boys, can you puts the phone on mute? Hey, in Russia, phone mutes you! Henghenghenhgg Hokay, now is time to stop for the jokings. For all yous on the phone I am Yakov Smirnov, and I am comedy artist escape from Russia. Now the President Bush he is making me the deputy outreach coordinator for the Nationals Endowments for the Art. What a country! This is why I make this phones call with all of you today. You are all very very important buddies from the Arts community and the Crafts community and the Vegas Lounge and Branson community. Is my job to lets you buddies know how much Mr. President Bush think you doing important Arts and shows. Is totally awesome!

MR. HANEY’S CHAINSAW:  vrrruuppp vruupppa winggadinggg vvvvwiiing wiiiiiiiiing

MR. SMIRNOV:  Mr. Haney, you put chainsaw on mutes, hokay? Now like Yakov say, Mr. President he is like many things you do with the lawn ornaments and needlepoints and like thats. But he knows is tough out theres for the Arts people and sometimes yous have to do two buffet shows every day to make the ends meet.  So he say, hey! How abouts that Nationals Art Endowments? It gots plenty money for my buddies. So he say, Yakov get my buddies together and talks about how they can go do the Art things for service to me. Oops, I mean America!

MS. CZARNOSKI:  Speaking as an artist, I would first like to say, what’s my cut?

MR. SMIRNOV:  Is very good question. Is very much sliding scale depending how much service yous do for Mr. Bush. I mean America community. Mister Bush he sees many places where is good for Art. Here is to explain Mr. good buddy vice president Dick Cheney.

MR. CHENEY: Hello everyone and thank you Yakov. I would like to say…

MR. SMIRNOV:  Please not to shoots me, Mr. Vice Presidents!

MR. CHENEY:

MR. SMIRNOV:  hhenng heh… heee…

MR. CHENEY:

MR. SMIRNOV:  uh… Yakov make bad joke. Please Cheney buddy, Yakov sorry.

MR. CHENEY:    As I was saying, the President and I believe the Hillbilly Arts and Entertainment community can play a crucial role in moving our country, and the political debate forward. Whether your home base is Branson or Myrtle Beach or Laughlin, whether your art is wind chimes or plywood ducks, all of you can leverage your talents to address the plight the GOP community. While winning valuable federal prizes! For example, let’s say you’re playing the weekend buffet show at an Indian bingo casino. Why not slip in a positive plug for Halliburton, or a zinger against Nancy Pelosi? I’m sure we Yakov here can find some NEA grant money to cover that as performance art. Another example — do we have any garden gnome-ists on the call?

MR. SCHMITKE:  Yes.

MR. CHENEY:    Great. You all know we are trying to grow support behind the surge in Iraq. Let’s say you wanted to illustrate this with an NEA grant to put a “surge” of 25,000 garden gnomes on the Capitol Hill lawn. Ka-ching, ka-ching ka-ching. That’s just the beginning. I encourage all of you to think about what you can do to support the President through your own individual creative medium, whether it is celebrity impersonation or macrame or welding whimsical mailbox stickmen.

MR. SMIRNOV:  Hokey dokey. Any questions?

MRS. COHEN:   Sylvia Cohen here. I guess I have two questions — one, is this art, and two, is this legal?

MR. CHENEY:   Jesus Christ, those have to be the two stupidest questions I have heard since the 2000 vice presidential debate. Jeez, do I really have to explain this to you? Of course it’s legal, you idiot! Because it’s art. And it’s art because, well, what the hell isn’t? That’s the beauty of the whole NEA system. According to the manual… what exactly does it say, Smirnov?

MR. SMIRNOV:  Let’s see… “art includes the expressive behaviors of ordinary people.”

MR. CHENEY:   Exactly, expressive behaviors. And isn’t that what you morons do? You just happen to express yourself with bead-dazzlers and lounge music. So what? Jeez, do you know how much money the NEA shells out on ‘expressive behaviors’ made from smeared poop? For your information, it subsidizes more manure than the USDA. Hell, if it wasn’t for the PR problems I would’ve asked for an NEA grant for shooting that guy in the face. So stop this silly crap about calling yourselves ’singers’ and ‘entertainers’ and ‘doll collectors.’ You are ARTISTS, kapiche?

MR. SMIRNOV:  Hokay, time for one last question.

MRS. BURGE:   Beverly Burge. I’m a scrapbooker myself, but I was wondering if this program paid for writers.

MR. CHENEY:   I dunno, I suppose. Why?

MRS. BURGE:   Well, my son David writes, and needs some money, so I thought…

MR. CHENEY:   Oh. That guy. Sorry, I don’t think we can push the standards that low.

#1: Us Citizens.

#2: You elected officials.

I really prefer writing long pieces on why Ernest Borgnine, Lee Marvin and Johnny Rotten rule. It’s more fun to talk about how everything in popular culture that everyone else likes actually sucks, and I’m even going to provide some inspirational music selections below. But duty calls. Right now, a bunch of people whose salaries you and I pay and who work for us are telling us to shut up and do as we’re told.

That’s just not gonna happen.

Message to our representatives: Hey Bub, I didn’t swear allegiance to the Constitution and deploy twice to defend it to shrug my shoulders and say, “Well, guess that old First Amendment thing doesn’t apply to me” just because you’re tired of hearing about how completely and thoroughly your plan to turn our health care system into another DMV sucks. Here’s how it’s going to be: Like it or not, you’re going to stand there, zip your pie hole for once, and listen to your constituents.

You may not like us mere citizens daring to question you. You may turn to your entourage, gasping in horror because some mere business owner has the nerve to ask you why you think shooting his taxes up over 60% so some deadbeat who doesn’t want to fork over the money to buy his own policy can get covered for free is a good idea. I know it must be a shock to realize that you aren’t some minor potentate, immune to criticism and answering only to yourself. But that’s too damn bad. This is a democracy, and you work for us.

It’s time to remember that the key word in the phrase “public servant” is “servant.” You’re not our “masters,” not our “rulers,” and not even our “new insect overlords.” You’re our servants. So serve. Start off by bringing me a draft Dos Equis lager, with a lime, pronto. Oh, and vote against socialized medicine.

And another thing, Mac. Like the rest of your employers, I don’t dig being called a “Nazi” by one of your little lefty functionaries. First, it’s inaccurate. Maybe your flunkie’s commie professor at Bennington never taught him enough to know that the Nazis were on his side of the poli-sci spectrum and not mine. The word “Nazi” is short for “National Socialist,” not “National Free-Market Supply-Side Libertarian with a Strong Grounding in Traditional Values.” Perhaps I could be called a “Nfmsslwasgitvi,” but I’m sure as hell not a “Nazi.” Second, me and my ancestors have protected this country from Nazis, commies, thugs and other assorted scumbags for generations, and if someone freaking calls me a Nazi to my face someone’s getting knocked on his fifth point of contact.

And stop impugning my motives, Dude. Supposedly all of us who aren’t thrilled about this health care reform abomination are speaking up only because we’re in the pay of the evil Big Insurance and Big Pharmaceuticals. To that, I ask a question – Where’s my check? I don’t want to be saying that this is idiotic for free like a sucker.

Now, if we speak, will they listen? Oh yeah. In 1986, I spent the summer drinking Rolling Rock and chasing girls in Washington, activities I interrupted occasionally to intern on the Hill for Congressman Duncan Hunter (Duncan ruled – he kept a 12 gauge in his office closet and thought we should give the Contras the Bomb). The point is that I remember the intense interest the representatives had in constituent contacts – they counted every letter, categorized them and paid very, very, very close attention to the mood of the voters.

You better believe that every member who doesn’t represent a district to the left of Berkeley is feeling the heat and shuddering in terror at the prospect of having to find a real job in January 2011 if he or she votes wrong on this one. Not everyone gets to run for re-election in a district where 72.5% of the voters agree with the proposition “U.S. out of North America.“ Write, call, fax, email, and best of all, show up at a town hall meeting or at the local office – it matters.

And when you speak out – and you must speak out, even if your name goes into the big database of wrongthinkers at Central Committee headquarters (Note to der Commissar: There are two “H’s” in “Schlichter”) – here are some basic principles that you should demand that any health care reform plan incorporate:

1. Health care is not a right. You are not entitled to someone else handing it to you for free any more than you are entitled to free Special K, a free condo in Maui or a free Nintendo Wii.

2. Everyone is responsible for obtaining and paying for his own and his family’s health care. But isn’t it true that some folks just don’t have the money? Well, here’s a powerful wealth-building strategy that I’ll let the freeloaders out there in on for nothing: Get a job. Then you can buy your own damn health insurance. I work three jobs and I’m getting a masters degree. I’m not loving the idea of paying your freight too, so roll off the couch, do a push-up, and start eyeballing the Craigslist want ads.

3. I actually sort of respect illegal aliens – anyone who will swim a river, cross a desert and dodge cops to work for minimum wage cooking me Big Macs is the kind of guy I want in America. But that doesn’t mean I want to pick up the tab when one gets a rash. Go home, get in line, then welcome back when your turn comes.

4. The government is so wrapped up in health care that right now you effectively have no choices.  I know this because I pay for my employees’ health care and I have a wide variety of one choice at one price among two companies. Thanks for “helping” me choose by eliminating all choice, California.

5. As a lawyer, let me draw the fire of my peers. The malpractice system is nearly as big a scam as global warming – the only difference is a few people actually believe in global warming. Everyone in the legal field knows that the malpractice system is a racket.

6. The government must have nothing to do with providing health care. Nada. Zero. Zip. There’s no need to extend its unbroken track record of failure right into my doctor’s office. Time to get yourself pumped up and ready – and to give me something to talk about that tangentially relates to pop culture.

*****

Here are six great tunes to get you in the frame of mind to do your job as an American citizen – to make yourself heard:

1. Get a Job by The Silhouettes. Obeying this concise directive would go a huge distance in solving the problem of the uninsured.

2. The Ballad of the Green Berets by Staff Sergeant Barry Sadler. This, the most literal song of all time, is a potent reminder that the right to speak out we are exercising didn’t come free and didn’t come cheap. Don’t waste your rights – dissent is almost as patriotic as fighting your country’s enemies or backing up those that do.

3. Fight the Power by Public Enemy. Embrace the chorus and ignore the rest of the lyrics, along with the silly Malcolm X imagery. Catchy, motivating and who can resist old school Flavor Flav!

4. The Theme to the Magnificent Seven by Elmer Bernstein. The ultimate psyche-up music for Americans fighting against all odds. But as the Seven showed, when we’re united we’re invincible – and we’re not about to let ourselves be vinced by a bunch of collectivist doofuses, lefty hacks and their union thugs.

5. God Bless The U.S.A. by Lee Greenwood. The best thing about this song is the way its raw sentimentality and naked patriotism tends to make liberals so uncomfortable. That’s the spirit animating this campaign to preserve our country as we know it, and a little faith in our country’s principles is nothing to be ashamed of. I just wish it had some snarling guitars.

6. I Fought the Law by the Clash. Okay, here’re the snarling guitars. And yeah, I know the Clash thought they were leftists. I don’t care. Anyway, here’s my tortured reasoning as to why this song is relevant here: The law is our Constitution and the First Amendment, the liberals are fighting it, and we’re going to win. Okay, it’s just a really great song that I use to get me amped up for court.

So, ignore the people telling you to sit down and shut up, get pumped, move out and make your voice heard. And I’d sure appreciate it if someone out there could let me know where I can pick up my check from the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy.

250,000 people lined the route

The Parade features many Military groups and R2R was honored to be a part of such a great event.

The riders left the Parade area and headed down the GW parkway under the usually great escort of the American Legion Riders.

Heading down the Parade route

The ride group is made up of many different types of riders. There are many general public riders who are here to support the wounded warriors and enjoy a great cycling tour. There are the wounded warriors, many of them who are cycling for the first time. the last group is our support staff made up of volunteers, friends, and spouses. For many of the staff, this is there 2nd or 3rd time supporting the R2R program.

R2R with Gary Sinise and Lee Greenwood

Manassas is famous of course for staging 2 major battles in the Civil War, Bull Run 1 and Bull Run 2.

The First Battle of Bull Run, also known as the First Battle of Manassas (the name used by Confederate forces and still often used in the Southern United States), was fought July 21, 1861, near Manassas, Virginia. It was the first major land battle of the American Civil War.

Union Gen. McDowell’s ambitious plan for a surprise flank attack against the Confederate left was not well executed by his inexperienced officers and men, but the Confederates, who had been planning to attack the Union left flank, found themselves at an initial disadvantage.

The Confederates, under Stonewall Jackson,  launched a strong counterattack and as the Union troops began withdrawing under pressure, many panicked and it turned into a rout as they frantically ran in the direction of nearby Washington, D.C. Both sides were sobered by the violence and casualties of the battle, and they realized that the war would potentially be much longer and bloodier than they had originally anticipated.

In the Second Battle of Manassas, Lee, Jackson, and Longstreet drove the Union back to Centerville. It was Longstreet’s counter attack against the Union General Pope that sealed the victory. Tomorrow, the Riders will ride thru the battlefield area.

Tomorrow the group heads to Fredericksburg.

Regards,

Ride 2 Recovery
Making a Difference in the Lives of Wounded Warriors
818.888.7091×1
818.710.1453 Fax
www.Ride2Recovery.com

You can also follow the ride by joining our Facebook Ride 2 Recovery group.

Supporters include American Legion Auxiliary, USO, Star Trac, VFW, Otis Spunkmeyer, Sunkist, Giant Bicycles, League of American Bicyclists, Operation Rebound, American Legion Riders, Step Up 4 Vets, California American Legion, Coca-Cola, Shimano, Veltec Sports, Hincapie Sports, Alternative Vehicles, Hansen’s, Clif Bar, Rudy Project, DeFeet, Park Tool, Speedplay, ProMax, Chamois Butt’r, CytoSport, and Bicycling Magazine. R2R is an America Supports You Homefront Group.