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<channel>
	<title>Big Hollywood &#187; Larry David</title>
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		<title>&#8216;Newsweek&#8217;s&#8217; Snobbish Stand-Up Slam</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjena/2009/11/20/newsweeks-snobbish-stand-up-slam/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjena/2009/11/20/newsweeks-snobbish-stand-up-slam/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 20 Nov 2009 20:33:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeffrey Jena</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Entertainment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Featured Story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Media Criticism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Barney Frank]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bill Maher]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bob Goldthwaite]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dan Horn]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dane Cook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Emo Phillips]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jay Johnon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jeff Dunham]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry The Cable Guy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Louis C.K.]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Newsweek]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[performing arts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ronn Lucas]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sarah Ball]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sarah palin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sarah Silverman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stand-up comedy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Terry Fator]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=264486</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Stand-up comedy is the least respected of all the performing arts. As if being a stand-up comic weren’t hard enough; the years of being judged by every person who owns a liquor license and a microphone, driving six hours to a non-existent gig, begging moronic agents and managers who are looking for a “new, original [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Stand-up comedy is the least respected of all the performing arts. As if being a stand-up comic weren’t hard enough; the years of being judged by every person who owns a liquor license and a microphone, driving six hours to a non-existent gig, begging moronic agents and managers who are looking for a “new, original and exciting” talent to come out to see your show only to be asked why you aren’t more “Seinfeld-ish.” On top of that it takes years to develop an act and find your voice on stage. There are child actors, child musicians, tiny dancers and even I would guess a few very young working writers, but no child comics. Why? Because stand-up comedy is the only experiential-based art form. Kids can tell “jokes” but they can’t do stand-up. Stand-up comedy, really good stand-up comedy has evolved from joke telling into a personal narrative dialogue with the audience.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-full wp-image-265550 aligncenter" title="large_larrycable" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/11/large_larrycable.jpg" alt="large_larrycable" width="426" height="304" /></p>
<p>Still, every now and then some elitist hack with a degree from the right college and the proper connections gets a job at a failing weekly magazine and decides to take a shot at you and your profession, feeling they are qualified to judge this art form because they know how to laugh and talk. This is rarely if ever done with other art forms. Seriously folks, when is the last time you saw an article about actors who can’t act, dancers who can’t dance, painters who can’t paint or pointless “performance artists.” Yet, about every six months some “critic” declares a number of famous comics “not funny.”   <span id="more-264486"></span></p>
<p>Ms. <a href="http://www.newsweek.com/id/222503">Sarah Ball of the soon defunct Newsweek </a>is the latest to declare some great comics “not funny.” In her article she lists 12 acts and gives snarky put downs of their talents. I found it interesting that Ms. Ball’s list is mostly west coast, politically conservative/moderate comics. Apparently if you are from New York and ultra-liberal Ms. Ball finds you hilarious!</p>
<p>Topping her list is every elitist favorite comedy punching bag Larry the Cable Guy. Larry’s sin seems to be he is a little too lowbrow for Ms. Ball, whom I am sure worships at the altar of urinator Larry David, and christophobe Sarah Silverman. There are a couple of folks working at the top of the intellectual chart. When talking about Dane Cook (I admit, not my favorite) she heaps praise on Louis C.K. (a guy I happen to also enjoy) who also tends towards the scatological for his humor.</p>
<p>Here is another thing that annoys me worst than Barney Frank, several times Ms. Ball demeans comics for being less than original and yet in her writing she uses a number of “stock” lines, clichés and banal comments. She also works for a magazine which recently selected a cover picture of Sarah Palin that was borrowed from a shoot for another magazine and used without contextual reference.</p>
<p>Ms. Ball also apparently hasn’t seen some of the comics she lists in some time. For Emo Phillips she uses an outdated photo, (again Newsweek using a photo out of context!) and critiques the vocal and delivery style he was using in the 90’s. Artists grow and change Ms. Ball; you might want to catch Bob Goldthwaite sometime this century too!  Her total critique of Jeff Dunham is that he is a ventriloquist, a comedy form she declared “went out of vogue in the Eisenhower era.” So did unbiased journalism and accurate reporting, Ms. Ball, but I’ll save that for another blog. Ventriloquism is experiencing a great revival outside elitist circles with Ronn Lucas and Terry Fator being two of the top draws in Las Vegas. While Jay Johnson, Jeff Dunham and Dan Horn wow audiences across the country. It might do Ms. Ball good to get out of Manhattan once in awhile and see what us rubes are doing out here in Flyoverland.</p>
<p>There are a lot of comics who I don’t find funny but I realize that my taste in comedy is skewered by my values, faith, politics and a number of other factors. I would never declare Bill Maher “not funny.” Though I find his drug addled ramblings repulsive at times, I realize that a number of equally intelligent folks find him hysterical. I might say I find his humor “baffling” or call him an “alleged” comedian but to declare him “not funny” isn’t fair to Bill or his fans.</p>
<p>People like different things, that’s why they put numbers on horses at the track. I would expect an open and fair minded progressive person like Ms. Ball to be a little more…what’s that word? Tolerant!</p>
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		<slash:comments>102</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>NBC&#8217;s ObamaVision: Green Week and Lousy Writing</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/sright/2009/11/17/nbcs-obamavision-green-week-and-lousy-writing/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/sright/2009/11/17/nbcs-obamavision-green-week-and-lousy-writing/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 17 Nov 2009 22:13:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Stage Right</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Theatre]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Glee"]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[30 RRock]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[All My Sons]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Arthur Miller]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[big hollywood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[community]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Curb Your Enthusiasm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Death of a Salesman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[EIF]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Entertainment Industry Foundation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[GE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Green Week]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[heroes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[House Un-American Activities Committee]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nbc]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Obama]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Salem Witch Trials]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Service]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sesame Street]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sustainable living]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Cruicible]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[the office]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Valerie Jarrett]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wicked]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=262190</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[NBC gives new meaning to the phrase &#8220;green screen&#8221; next week, spreading a pro-environmental message across five of its prime-time entertainment programs – AP News.
When Arthur Miller wrote “The Crucible” it was rightly seen as a brilliant allegory to the House Un-American Activities Committee.  It was a brilliant piece of drama about the Salem Witch [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: left;"><em>NBC gives new meaning to the phrase &#8220;green screen&#8221; next week, spreading a pro-environmental message across five of its prime-time entertainment programs </em><strong>– AP News</strong><em>.</em></p>
<p>When Arthur Miller wrote “<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Crucible">The Crucible</a>” it was rightly seen as a brilliant allegory to the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_Un-American_Activities_Committee">House Un-American Activities Committee</a>.  It was a brilliant piece of drama about the Salem Witch Trials of the late 17th Century with obvious corollaries to the political climate of post-World War II America.  And no matter where you fall on the political spectrum you must recognize the play as a classic in the canon of American drama.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-full wp-image-263578 aligncenter" title="nbc-green-logo" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/11/nbc-green-logo2.png" alt="nbc-green-logo" width="269" height="269" /></p>
<p>My admiration for much of Miller’s work gives me enough confidence to say that he would view the current efforts to ham-handedly inject political statements into television sitcoms as absolute crap.  It takes a deft hand to send a message without it seeming like you are sending a message… and the writers of &#8220;The Office&#8221; and &#8220;30 Rock,&#8221; as glib as they may be, are no “Arthur Millers”.</p>
<p>I love “The Office.”  I’m one of those apostates who actually like the U.S. version better than <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00jd68z">the original</a> (must be my knee-jerk patriotism at work).  But I saw my very first example of lousy (and I mean REALLY lousy) writing this season when they tried to force the issue of “Volunteer-ism” into the storyline.<span id="more-262190"></span></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><object classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" width="458" height="257" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="src" value="http://www.hulu.com/embed/HcIMLeRxYqsqT7VOioCyIQ" /><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="458" height="257" src="http://www.hulu.com/embed/HcIMLeRxYqsqT7VOioCyIQ" allowfullscreen="true"></embed></object></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">&#8211;<a href="http://www.hulu.com/watch/104035/the-office-volunteer"></a></p>
<p>And remember what genius came up with the idea for this storyline?  According to the memo revealed by<a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/10/15/leaked-memo-reveals-the-white-house-has-control-of-your-television-set/"> Big Hollywood</a> it was inspired by a call to action by the “<a href="http://www.powerlineblog.com/archives/2009/10/024805.php">most powerful writer since Julius Caesar</a>.” And now, to paraphrase the words of a truly great leader…“<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wi9y5-Vo61w">well, here they go again</a>.”</p>
<p>The left-wing flavor of the month is Green Week, on GE owned NBC.  We have already reported that our children have to suffer through “<a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/sright/2009/11/10/green-push-on-sesame-street-programming-your-kids-for-sustainable-living/">Sustainable Living</a>” storylines on &#8220;Sesame Street&#8221; and now NBC is preaching to the parents how being green is easy.  Unfortunately, it’s probably not going to be too entertaining.</p>
<p>Maybe the <a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091111/ap_on_en_tv/us_tv_green_nbc">AP description doesn’t do it justice</a>, but this doesn’t sound very funny to me:</p>
<blockquote><p>This year on &#8220;30 Rock,&#8221; corporate boss Jack Donaghy tells the late-night show&#8217;s staff it has to cut its carbon footprint by 5 percent, and puts Kenneth the Page in charge of getting it done.</p>
<p>In the comedy &#8220;Community,&#8221; the college is renamed &#8220;Environdale.&#8221; College students think they&#8217;re hiring the band Green Day for a gig, and instead gets the Celtic combo Greene Daeye. Dwight in &#8220;The Office&#8221; takes the role of &#8220;Recyclops&#8221; in that comedy. &#8220;Heroes&#8221; features cast members filling a truck with recyclables and talking about the importance of giving back to the earth.</p></blockquote>
<p>If the end-product is anything like the embarrassing “Volunteer-ism” thread from “The Office” we might actually see a four-way <a href="http://www.tvguide.com/jumptheshark/">Shark Jump</a> that <a href="http://www.knieveldays.com/">Evil Knievel</a> would admire.</p>
<p>I know a lot of writers.  And they all have a rebellious streak.  They love marching to the beat of a different drummer.  In fact, one of the main themes of “30 Rock” is the constant battles between the Bohemian writers and the corporate demands from the network.  So, why in hell do they go for this stuff?  It’s probably because they believe it.</p>
<p>That’s why we rarely see a storyline on a crime drama where a gun owner prevents a crime and saves a life.  Or why we rarely see a storyline about a teen in trouble choosing to give her child up for adoption rather than be an un-wed mother or extinguish the nascent life she is carrying (although I have high hopes for <a href="http://www.ivillage.com/glee-and-teen-pregnancy-why-so-blas/1-d-65690">“Glee” and the storyline they are pursuing</a>).</p>
<p>And over on HBO, if you really think about the notorious scene where<a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/11/03/christ-gets-pissed-on-muhammad-gets-a-150-million-biopic/"> Larry David is relieving himself with offensive results</a>.  Objectively speaking, wouldn’t it have been MUCH funnier if his assistant had been black and the urine splashed on a picture of President Obama and the assistant thought it was a divine miracle and began devoting her life to worshiping Barack?  It would have been funnier and it would have been a more contemporary comment on American Culture rather than a tired joke about Latino culture.  But, Larry David would never have thought in those terms because it’s not what he believes.</p>
<p>The biggest crime in all of this is that these stories will suffer due to this obnoxious attempt at preaching.  And the audiences’ enjoyment will suffer as well.  In the same way the audience is jarred out of their enjoyment of the musical “<a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/sright/2009/01/20/life-upon-the-wicked-stage/">Wicked</a>.”   The producers spent millions of dollars in costuming and special effects to transport the audience to the magical Land of Oz.  When the house falls on the Wicked Witch of the East in Act 2, the character of Glinda refers to it as “Regime Change.” It is supposed to be a laugh line.  But given the juxtaposition of Glinda in the story and her role as propagandist for the malevolent Wizard’s government, the majority of ticket holders who supported President Bush and the war in Iraq were sure to feel like they were being mocked from the stage.</p>
<p>If you’re Arthur Miller and you can tell me a story with great characters and great dialogue, I barely care that you’re criticizing the industrial war complex (&#8221;<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_My_Sons">All My Sons</a>&#8220;) or commenting on the post-war “American Dream” as a myth (&#8221;<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of_a_Salesman">Death of a Salesman</a>&#8220;).  Good writing is good writing and great entertainment is great entertainment.  Green Week on NBC, is doomed to be neither, so they should just stick with what they do best and leave the political propaganda to <a href="http://stopjarrett.com/tag/propaganda/">Valerie Jarrett</a>.</p>
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		<slash:comments>31</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Stand Up Notes From Flyover Country: Facebook Comment to Folks in the News</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjena/2009/11/04/stand-up-notes-from-flyover-country-facebook-comment-to-folks-in-the-news/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjena/2009/11/04/stand-up-notes-from-flyover-country-facebook-comment-to-folks-in-the-news/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 05 Nov 2009 02:05:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jeffrey Jena</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrity News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Political Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[David Axelrod]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dede Scozzafava]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[facebook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Fred Thompson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jeremiah Wright]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[John Boehner]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jon Corzine]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kevin Jennings]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Newt Gingrich]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[President Oabma]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sarah palin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Trevor Keezer]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=257662</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Like millions of other Americans I have been caught up in the Facebook/social networking craze. I believe that Facebook is like a near-death experience except your life passes before your eyes one friend request at a time. I have  been trying to “friend” a lot of people in the news, without much success. There&#8217;s been no [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-full wp-image-258142 aligncenter" title="Obama Fallen Soldiers" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/11/dignified-transfer.jpg" alt="Obama Fallen Soldiers" width="512" height="261" /></p>
<p>Like millions of other Americans I have been caught up in the Facebook/social networking craze. I believe that Facebook is like a near-death experience except your life passes before your eyes one friend request at a time. I have  been trying to “friend” a lot of people in the news, without much success. There&#8217;s been no acceptance of my friend requests from President Obama, Dede Scozzafava, Jeremiah Wright and a host of others. So in order to reach them with some timely advice I am posting some comments here. If you are on their Facebook friend list maybe you could pass them along. </p>
<p><strong>@ Dede Scozzafava</strong> &#8211; When you try to stand in the middle of the road you get run over. Thanks for showing where you stand when the heat was on. Go stand in the &#8220;has-been&#8221; line behind Arlen Specter.</p>
<p><strong>@ Barack Obama </strong>- Mr. President, if the trip to Dover wasn’t a photo-op or political why take a photographer along?<span id="more-257662"></span></p>
<p><strong>@ John Boehner</strong> &#8211; Nice play backing the person in the NY 23rd who ended up supporting the Democrat.  It’s about values, not party, Mr. Speaker. BTW, let your office staff know I am still waiting for a reply to my two e-mails and phone calls.</p>
<p><strong>@ Newt </strong>- See message to Boehner. I don’t know what your number is, but it is not 2012.</p>
<p><strong>@ Jon Corzine </strong>- Monster.com or Career Builders. Too bad one of the jobs BHO “saved” wasn’t yours.</p>
<p><strong>@ Kevin Jennings</strong> &#8211; If you really what to help the Prez- one word: Quit!</p>
<p><strong>@Larry David</strong> &#8211; Picking on Christians is easy because they are forgiving. It’s not edgy because it has been done to death. If you want to go out on a limb pick on Muslims, you may like the Salman Rushdie lifestyle.</p>
<p><strong>@ <a href="http://www.justicenewsflash.com/2009/11/03/god-button-caused-home-depot-employees-termination_200911032494.html">Trevor Keezer</a></strong> &#8211; You&#8217;re 23, you want to serve your country, enlist. You want to serve Christ, enter a seminary or volunteer at a soup kitchen. You want to work at Home Depot, do as you’re told.</p>
<p><strong>@ Sarah Palin</strong> &#8211; Well done being ahead of the curve in the NY 23rd. Let’s hope folks remember who started this thing in 2012.</p>
<p><strong>@ David Axelrod</strong> &#8211; Pick a date for- Action in Afghanistan, don’t ask, Gitmo, when you are responsible for the economy and when you stop blaming Bush.</p>
<p><strong>@ Fred Thompson</strong> &#8211; You are not the evil Spock, please shave! </p>
<p>Use the comments to add your own Facebook message to the news-maker of your choice.</p>
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			<wfw:commentRss>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjena/2009/11/04/stand-up-notes-from-flyover-country-facebook-comment-to-folks-in-the-news/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
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		<title>Christ Gets Pissed On, Muhammad Gets a $150 Million Biopic</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/11/03/christ-gets-pissed-on-muhammad-gets-a-150-million-biopic/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/11/03/christ-gets-pissed-on-muhammad-gets-a-150-million-biopic/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Nov 2009 16:28:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Nolte</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Film]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christ]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Islam]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mel gibson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Muhammad]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[passion of the christ]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=256634</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
There&#8217;s absolutely nothing wrong with a respectful, big-budget biopic of the prophet Muhammad &#8211; that&#8217;s not the point &#8211; but it&#8217;s well worth remembering that while he was one of the biggest movie stars in the world, Oscar-winning director Mel Gibson had his &#8221;Passion of the Christ&#8221; turned down by every studio in town. You know, even though 70% of Americans [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-full wp-image-256698 aligncenter" title="curb1_5001" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/11/curb1_5001.jpg" alt="curb1_5001" width="419" height="228" /></p>
<p>There&#8217;s absolutely nothing wrong with a respectful, big-budget biopic <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2009/nov/02/matrix-producer-plans-muhammad-biopic">of the prophet Muhammad</a> &#8211; that&#8217;s not the point &#8211; but it&#8217;s well worth remembering that while he was one of the biggest movie stars in the world, <em>Oscar-winning</em> director Mel Gibson had his &#8221;Passion of the Christ&#8221; turned down by every studio in town. You know, even though<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion_in_the_United_States"> 70% of Americans </a>identify themselves as Christians.</p>
<p>Now, if Gibson had produced &#8220;The Pissing on the Christ&#8230;&#8221;</p>
<blockquote><p>Producer Barrie Osborne cast Keanu Reeves as the messiah in The Matrix and helped defeat the dark lord Sauron in his record-breaking Lord of the Rings trilogy. Now the Oscar-winning American film-maker is set to embark on his most perilous quest to date: making a big-screen biopic of the prophet Muhammad.</p>
<p>Budgeted at around $150m (£91.5m), the film will chart Muhammad&#8217;s life and examine his teachings. Osborne told Reuters that he envisages it as &#8220;an international epic production aimed at bridging cultures. The film will educate people about the true meaning of <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/islam">Islam</a>&#8220;.</p></blockquote>
<p>The article then goes on to inform us that out of respect for Islamic law Muhammad will not be shown on the screen. If only such respect was extended to <em>every</em> major religion. Which isn&#8217;t to say religion, including Christianity, is above satire, but what we have here is another example of the mindset of those who control the most powerful propaganda machine ever created. Think about it: &#8220;The Passion&#8221; remains one of the most profitable films ever and yet an industry frequently ridiculed for reproducing ad nauseum anything resembling a hit will have none of it.  <span id="more-256634"></span></p>
<p>Feel free to comment away but please don&#8217;t make the mistake of accusing Hollywood of hypocrisy. This is an ideological war and there are no rules in war and anyone wringing their hands over &#8220;not playing fair&#8221; are missing the point.  </p>
<p>When you loath Christians and want to do everything in your power to marginalize who they are what they stand for, there&#8217;s nothing at all hypocritical about pissing on Christ and deferring to Muhammad.</p>
<p>In fact, that behavior is perfectly consistent.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;">***</p>
<p>Yes, I know, I know &#8230; even people I respect, those from our side of the aisle, are telling me that when it comes to Larry David&#8217;s urine and the &#8220;Onion&#8221; <a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/bighollywood/2009/11/02/the-onion-tragic-news-glenn-beck-not-dead/">wishing Glenn Beck dead</a> that I need to take a joke and not conform the stereotype of a stodgy, humorless conservative. But&#8230;</p>
<ul>
<li>&#8220;South Park&#8221; has never offended me.</li>
<li>One of my first DVD purchases was &#8220;<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079470/">The Life of Brian</a>.&#8221;</li>
<li>Here&#8217;s my eulogy to The Mighty <a href="http://dirtyharrysplace.com/?p=2213">George Carlin</a>.</li>
</ul>
<p>I can take a joke, even a satiric savaging.</p>
<p>What I don&#8217;t take so well are cheap shots &#8230; even at the expense of my Hip Credentials.</p>
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		<title>Larry David&#8217;s God-Given American Right to Be a Jerk</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/ekaris/2009/10/30/larry-davids-god-given-american-right-to-be-a-jerk/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/ekaris/2009/10/30/larry-davids-god-given-american-right-to-be-a-jerk/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 30 Oct 2009 18:44:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ellen Karis</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrity News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Featured Story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Curb Your Enthusiasm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hbo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jesus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jesus Christ]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nancy pelosi]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=255638</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[What in the world is wrong with people in the entertainment industry who come from humble beginnings, have a few years of real struggle and then with their uniqueness and by the grace of God (which you could interpret as luck), they make it big, as in rich and famous big. The chances of becoming [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>What in the world is wrong with people in the entertainment industry who come from humble beginnings, have a few years of real struggle and then with their uniqueness and by the grace of God (which you could interpret as luck), they make it big, as in <em>rich and famous big</em>. The chances of becoming as famous as Lindsay Lohan are 1 in 1,574,638 as tracked by E-Poll Market Research, but really, wouldn’t you rather be <em>you?</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-full wp-image-255646 aligncenter" title="curb1_500" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/10/curb1_5001.jpg" alt="curb1_500" width="419" height="228" /></p>
<p>Mr. David has been blessed beyond any struggling writer, producer, actor or stand-up comedian’s wildest dreams. His total cash receipts have still not been tallied since the funds continue to pour in from “Seinfeld,” but it’s accurate to say that with what he has earned to date, he could have paid for a lot of Nancy Pelosi’s botox.</p>
<p>Years after helping make television history, David jumped back into the small screen with the blessing of HBO and created “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” which &#8212; in line with him marching to the beat of his own drum &#8212; is done unscripted. The show has a very solid following as it is in its seventh season, which is three television lifetimes these days. Great Larry, Mazal Tov. Isn’t America grand? Bet you would only have had the career of Heidi from the Hills if you lived in Cuba. <span id="more-255638"></span></p>
<p>So what would possess Larry to create a scene where he’s at a Catholic woman’s home and accidentally pees on a portrait of Jesus hanging in her bathroom (of all places)?  I believe the motivator is pure and simple … an arrogant a sense of “I am a genius” entitlement because that’s what he’s been described as for two decades.</p>
<p>I’m a stand-up comedian and actress with a very high tolerance for humor. I’m also aware that comedy is subjective and what might be a falling-off-the-chair moment for one person can be an insomnia cure for another.  However, I believe that Larry knew exactly what he was doing to get a reaction. It has now become vogue to take swipes at Christianity whenever possible.  He could have picked anyone else to miss the toilet on and, by the way,  for such a genius he used the lowest common denominator of humor: the bathroom and urinating &#8212; a fine improvisational moment if there ever was one.</p>
<p>Let’s put our imaginary hats on and think of what the outrage would have been if this had been done to say, Muhammad—yes, exactly, lawsuits a-flying, reparations, apologies, a lifetime supply of Starbucks!! How dare you!!! But using Jesus, the Lord and Savior to at least 65% of the United States population… eh, who cares, I have a show to do and a laugh to get.  </p>
<p>I posted my disgust on Facebook and most people agreed. However, there are always those few who like to use freedom of speech as a replacement for freedom of being a complete jerk. One person I was arguing said, “Why don’t you stop complaining and do something, write or call HBO?”  I hate to admit this lefty had a point, but he did, so I called HBO. It took 15 minutes to get the number and an actual person on the line, who I told in a very nice way (I toned down my New Yorkness) that I was a stand-up comic open to all types of humor, but as a Christian I was insulted and found it very disrespectful. As I was speaking she let out a sigh, a big fat sigh, she then said she would make a note of it, though she did not ask my name, email &#8212; nothing!</p>
<p>So I guess I have to turn to the only recourse I have and cancel HBO.</p>
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		<title>Pissing on Jesus: Hollywood Hates Us Exhibit 11,567</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/10/29/pissing-on-jesus-hollywood-hates-us-exhibit-11567/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/10/29/pissing-on-jesus-hollywood-hates-us-exhibit-11567/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 30 Oct 2009 00:54:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Nolte</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Celebrity News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Culture]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Television]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Christ]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Curb Your Enthusiasm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Islam]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jesus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jesus Christ]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Muslim]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=255366</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
&#8220;Larry David would never do this to Muslims. He doesn&#8217;t have the guts.&#8221;
That&#8217;s missing the point.
Hypocrisy or a fear of how some wacko extremist might react has nothing to do with this. Hollywood constantly singles out Christians for cruel ridicule and the worst kind of stereotyping for one simple reason&#8230;
They hate us.
They hate our guts.
There&#8217;s nothing more complicated [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-full wp-image-255402 aligncenter" title="curb640_slideshow_604x500" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/10/curb640_slideshow_604x5001.jpg" alt="curb640_slideshow_604x500" width="434" height="255" /></p>
<p>&#8220;Larry David would never do this to Muslims. He doesn&#8217;t have the guts.&#8221;</p>
<p>That&#8217;s missing the point.</p>
<p>Hypocrisy or a fear of how some wacko extremist might react has nothing to do with this. Hollywood constantly singles out Christians for cruel ridicule and the worst kind of stereotyping for one simple reason&#8230;</p>
<p>They hate us.</p>
<p>They hate our guts.</p>
<p>There&#8217;s nothing more complicated to this question than that.</p>
<p>I promise you that if every Muslim on the planet was as gentle as a kitten, it would still be Christians singled out by the entertainment industry at every opportunity.<span id="more-255366"></span></p>
<p>Now, you wouldn&#8217;t know it from following modern-day pop culture, but we Christians do have a sense of humor and are just as capable of laughing at ourselves as anyone. But we also know when we&#8217;re being singled out, when we&#8217;re being laughed <em>at</em> and the difference between good-natured and mean-spirited. We acknowledge that there are many good people working in Hollywood who oppose this kind of bigotry and double-standard, just not enough of them to put a stop to it&#8230;</p>
<p>Here&#8217;s how much they hate us, how much they want to hurt us &#8212; and it goes way beyond a willingness to damage their own bottom line&#8230;</p>
<p>Good people hurt innocent people every day. We lose our tempers, say things in anger and generally come to regret it later. That&#8217;s one of the rougher parts of dealing with the human condition. And when good people watch Larry David piss on Christ, his mocking and blatant disrespect makes them angry. Some might even think, &#8221;I should produce a YouTube of me pissing on Hollywood&#8217;s god &#8211; Barack Obama!&#8221; Which wouldn&#8217;t be a difficult or expensive thing to do in this digital age.</p>
<p>But good people don&#8217;t follow through on such things. Eventually, their better nature takes over as they think about how such a cruel and disrespectful act might hurt those they know who admire Obama &#8230; or the president&#8217;s two young daughters. </p>
<p>Nothing, however, stopped Larry David &#8212; not the time, logistics, planning or funds needed to put this cruel episode together. David&#8217;s not a dumb man, and neither are the many people who made the production possible. Every one of them knew exactly what they were doing, what the outcome would be and what Christ means to His followers. </p>
<p>And they relished every moment of it; the planning, execution and most of all, the uproar and disappointment that followed.</p>
<p>Anger puts cruel thoughts in your head. Hate&#8217;s the fuel required to take you across the finish line.</p>
<p>There&#8217;s no shortage of fuel in Hollywood.</p>
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		<title>CAIR Seeks HBO Apology for &#8216;Curb&#8217; Episode Mocking Jesus</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/bighollywood/2009/10/29/cair-seeks-hbo-apology-for-curb-episode-mocking-jesus/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/bighollywood/2009/10/29/cair-seeks-hbo-apology-for-curb-episode-mocking-jesus/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 Oct 2009 22:30:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Big Hollywood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Theatre]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CAIR]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Curb Your Enthusiasm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Islam]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jesus]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=255306</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
WASHINGTON, Oct. 29 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ &#8212; A prominent national Muslim civil rights and advocacy organization today called on HBO to apologize for an episode of &#8220;Curb Your Enthusiasm&#8221; in which the main character splattered urine on a painting of Jesus.
SEE: Larry David Blasted for &#8216;Curb&#8217; Episode Where He Urinates on Jesus Painting http://tinyurl.com/hboepisode
In a letter to [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-full wp-image-255326 aligncenter" title="curb1_500" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/10/curb1_500.jpg" alt="curb1_500" width="430" height="265" /></p>
<p>WASHINGTON, Oct. 29 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ &#8212; A prominent national Muslim civil rights and advocacy organization today called on HBO to apologize for an episode of &#8220;Curb Your Enthusiasm&#8221; in which the main character splattered urine on a painting of Jesus.</p>
<p>SEE: Larry David Blasted for &#8216;Curb&#8217; Episode Where He Urinates on Jesus Painting <a href="http://tinyurl.com/hboepisode">http://tinyurl.com/hboepisode</a></p>
<p>In a letter to HBO Chairman and CEO Bill Nelson, Nihad Awad, national executive director of the Washington-based Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) wrote:</p>
<p>&#8220;It is beyond tasteless to insult the religious sensibilities of billions of people in America and around the world with such a cheap and vulgar publicity stunt. Jesus, peace be upon him, is loved and revered by both Christians and Muslims. Muslims view him as one of God&#8217;s greatest messengers to mankind.<span id="more-255306"></span></p>
<p>&#8220;The Quran, Islam&#8217;s revealed text, states: &#8216;Behold! The angels said: &#8220;O Mary! God gives you glad tidings of a Word from Him. His name will be Jesus Christ, the son of Mary, held in honor in this world and the Hereafter and in (the company of) those nearest to God.&#8221; (The Holy Quran, 3:45)</p>
<p>&#8220;The Prophet Muhammad said: &#8216;Both in this world and in the hereafter, I am the nearest of all people to Jesus, the son of Mary. The prophets are paternal brothers; their mothers are different, but their religion is one.&#8217;</p>
<p>&#8220;We understand the drive for ratings, but no one benefits from such a crude attempt to boost the network&#8217;s bottom line by manufacturing a religious controversy. HBO should apologize.&#8221;</p>
<p>Awad added that American Muslim television viewers contacted CAIR to express their concerns about the HBO episode.</p>
<p>CAIR is America&#8217;s largest Muslim civil liberties and advocacy organization. Its mission is to enhance the understanding of Islam, encourage dialogue, protect civil liberties, empower American Muslims, and build coalitions that promote justice and mutual understanding.</p>
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		<title>Larry David&#8217;s &#8216;Piss Christ&#8217;</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/bighollywood/2009/10/27/larry-davids-piss-christ/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/bighollywood/2009/10/27/larry-davids-piss-christ/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 Oct 2009 21:22:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Big Hollywood</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Television]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Piss Christ" religion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Curb Your Enthusiasm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hbo]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=253922</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[An email received today:
&#8220;First let me state that I&#8217;ve been a fan of &#8220;Curb Your Enthusiasm&#8221; for many years and, even though Larry David is a liberal, I generally enjoy the writing and Larry&#8217;s antics. However, this time what I saw made me feel a little sick, extremely disappointed and a bit angry as well. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>An email received today:</strong></p>
<p>&#8220;First let me state that I&#8217;ve been a fan of &#8220;Curb Your Enthusiasm&#8221; for many years and, even though Larry David is a liberal, I generally enjoy the writing and Larry&#8217;s antics. However, this time what I saw made me feel a little sick, extremely disappointed and a bit angry as well. I will never watch the show again as I have lost all respect and feelings of good will for Mr. David.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-full wp-image-253926     aligncenter" title="curb-your-enthusiam08" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/10/curb-your-enthusiam08.jpg" alt="curb-your-enthusiam08" width="367" height="240" /></p>
<p>&#8220;Did you happen to see the episode to which I refer? Assuming you did not catch the episode, briefly stated: Larry pisses on the face of a painting of Jesus Christ, followed by mocking of Christians who believe the piss drop on the face of Jesus is a tear, thus they’ve witnessed a miracle. I wonder how many other viewers, Christian and non Christian, are similarly shocked and disgusted? Of course, the hypocrisy is that Mr. David would never exhibit such gross contempt for any other religion, especially Islam. <span id="more-253922"></span></p>
<p>&#8220;Can you imagine the shit storm that would follow if David pissed on a painting of the prophet Muhammad? Of course, HBO, the complicit scum that they are, would not have allowed that to air.&#8221;</p>
<p><a href="http://www.avclub.com/articles/the-bare-midriff,34528/"><strong>This article</strong></a><strong> also mentions the incident.</strong></p>
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		<title>&#8216;Whatever Works&#8217; Doesn&#8217;t</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/dgifford/2009/07/16/whatever-works-or-whatever/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/dgifford/2009/07/16/whatever-works-or-whatever/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 16 Jul 2009 15:32:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dan Gifford</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Entertainment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Whatever Works"]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Freud]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jung]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[woody allen]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=183354</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Who says time travel isn&#8217;t possible?
I spent 92 long minutes in Woody Allen&#8217;s cinematic wayback machine yesterday, reliving almost all the 60&#8217;s pseudo-psychoanalytic cultural neuroses, nihilism and negative leftist judgmental-stereotypes he popularized then that still have us on the couch and at each other&#8217;s throats.

Allen wrote the script more than 30 years ago with Zero [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Who says time travel isn&#8217;t possible?</p>
<p>I spent 92 long minutes in Woody Allen&#8217;s cinematic wayback machine yesterday, reliving almost all the 60&#8217;s pseudo-psychoanalytic cultural neuroses, nihilism and negative leftist judgmental-stereotypes he popularized then that still have us on the couch and at each other&#8217;s throats.</p>
<p style="text-align: center"><a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/07/scarlett-johansson-n-woody-allen-04.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-184290 aligncenter" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/07/scarlett-johansson-n-woody-allen-04.jpg" alt="" width="336" height="243" /></a></p>
<p>Allen wrote the script more than 30 years ago with Zero Mostel in mind as the obvious, self-involved, Allen alter-ego lead character living in a psychobabble New York City hell of his own creation. But a not so funny thing happened on Zero&#8217;s way to the Forum years ago, leaving Allen to look for an actor who could convincingly play the part of a brilliant Jewish string theory former professor in his sixties who manages to schtup and then marry a vulnerable, naive teenager. The familiar ring of that scenario is integral to the theme of &#8220;Whatever,&#8221; which is that there is no God, everything that happens is just random cosmic kaka, and so we should all do whatever gets us our jollies.<span id="more-183354"></span></p>
<p>Yahweh may not agree, but He did create a person unbalanced enough &#8212; at least from what I read &#8212; to play the lead: Larry David of <em>Seinfeld</em> and <em>Curb Your Enthusiasm</em> (mine was curbed shortly after the fade from black).</p>
<p>In scenes that must have been twenty or more pages long, David&#8217;s Boris Yellnikoff &#8211;emphasis on &#8220;yell&#8221; &#8212; alternately kvetched and sneered in gawd awful-long soliloquy to the fourth wall about sophomoric penis envy, vaginal snapper fear, Oedipal lust, suppressed homosexuality, atheism, NRA hating, fly-over land cretin bashing, inner-selves yearning to be free and other urban elitist Nietzsche-Kant-Sartre politically liberal arrogance that used to be such great co-ed thigh openers at frat house mixers or the White Horse Tavern while channeling and analyzing Dylan Thomas&#8217; inner Freudianism Jungism.</p>
<p>Do not go gentle into that good theater darkness for this one, my friend, unless you can stand the past life regression to &#8220;Oooh, so what were Freud and Jung really saying?&#8221; by the keg.</p>
<p>Well, Freud said sometimes a cigar is just a cigar while Jung thought that a woman was a woman but a cigar was a smoke. But lemme play it out for ya &#8230;</p>
<p>My name is Sigund Freud outa Vienna, and I bring youuuu &#8230; a VIRUS for the Jung !!!</p>
<p>You make me feel so Jung<br />
You make me feel my head has sprung<br />
And every time I look at you<br />
I feel so very, psychological.</p>
<p>The Moment that you speak<br />
I wanna hold my head and freak &#8230;</p>
<p>&#8220;That&#8217;s sooo clever and deep. And just where is your room in this great big house?&#8221;</p>
<p>Heh, heh&#8230;</p>
<p>Wouldn&#8217;t every aging man like to live the Lolita fantasy of a nubile bed-mate who swallows every cockeyed pessimistic rant about life and love and God without challenge while offering a Viagra? Sure you would. And I&#8217;ll bet Woody likes it too, which is why his Yellnikoff seems an awful lot like the Max Von Sydow misanthrope of &#8220;Hannah and Her Sisters.&#8221; It&#8217;s on his mind. It&#8217;s in his life. Woody may look mellow, but there&#8217;s a raging river of recurring themes that cannot find resolution behind those horn rims &#8212; emphasis on horn.  Maybe that&#8217;s why he&#8217;s gone to a shrink every day for the past 50 years.</p>
<p>How Allen managed to inject his own psycho-neuroses, political and social views on the American culture, I don&#8217;t know. Was his wimpy, over-therapied, pseudo-intellectual image something America wanted to imitate? Or were those who most identified with Allen already that way? Whatever, the unvarnished anger and snobbery of the urban chattering class toward those who lead traditional lives (married, kids, religious, employed at non artsy jobs &#8212; particularly those who lead those traditional lives in &#8220;flyover land&#8221;) is on display in this film for all us artistic elites to wallow in.</p>
<p>Guys who like football are hiding their lust for guys by watching guys in tight pants. Guys who own a gun are compensating for the inadequate size of their penis. Belief in God is a form of arrested mental development. All of which reduces to Allen tellin&#8217; those schmucks who think they&#8217;re happy with their routine lives that they aren&#8217;t.</p>
<p>Some of Allen&#8217;s solutions?</p>
<p>Admit you&#8217;re really gay and live the lifestyle. Throw away that Bible that&#8217;s causing sexual repression and discover the new Jesus of a bisexual menage a trois. Take advantage of teenage girls. Try and commit suicide &#8212; twice &#8212; as Yellnikoff does.</p>
<p>Try? I&#8217;d have been willing to kill that sob for sure, especially after finding a $55 parking ticket on my car after the movie.</p>
<p>Whatever.</p>
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		<title>Review: &#8216;Whatever Works&#8217;</title>
		<link>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/07/03/review-whatever-works/</link>
		<comments>http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/07/03/review-whatever-works/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 04 Jul 2009 01:59:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>John Nolte</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Featured Story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Reviews]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA["Whatever Works"]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ed Begley Jr.]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[evan rachel wood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hannah and Her Sisters]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Larry David]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[patricia clarkson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[woody allen]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/?p=176422</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Woody Allen&#8217;s told his share of dark stories. &#8220;Crimes and Misdemeanors&#8221; (1989) and &#8220;Match Point&#8221; (2005) immediately come to mind. Both are remarkable films that delve into the auteur&#8217;s well-traveled theme of what morality means in a world he sees as godless and pointlessly random.  In each, the protagonist plots and carries out a cold-blooded [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000095/">Woody Allen&#8217;s</a> told his share of dark stories. &#8220;Crimes and Misdemeanors&#8221; (1989) and &#8220;Match Point&#8221; (2005) immediately come to mind. Both are remarkable films that delve into the auteur&#8217;s well-traveled theme of what morality means in a world he sees as godless and pointlessly random.  In each, the protagonist plots and carries out a cold-blooded murder. Neither is caught or punished. In fact, both prosper. Without condoning the behavior, Allen expertly uses the dramatic extreme of murder to illustrate his belief that we live in a world where if you can get past the law and over your own conscience, it&#8217;s all relative. And you need not agree to find this idea fascinating.</p>
<p style="text-align: center"><a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/07/191.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-176466 aligncenter" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/07/191.jpg" alt="" width="365" height="239" /></a><a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/07/19.jpg"></a></p>
<p>With &#8220;<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1178663/">Whatever Works</a>,&#8221; a deeply unpleasant, unfunny &#8220;comedy&#8221; starring <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0202970/">Larry David</a>, Allen takes a disturbing stride towards condoning this form of nihilism. We&#8217;re far beyond &#8220;The Heart Wants What It Wants,&#8221; the memorable theme explored so tenderly in Allen&#8217;s 1986 masterpiece &#8220;<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091167/">Hannah and Her Sisters</a>.&#8221; In that film there were at least very real and human consequences to infidelity and other selfish, romantic pursuits. No more. &#8220;Whatever Works&#8221; might as well be titled &#8220;Whatever Works Works.&#8221;<span id="more-176422"></span></p>
<p>David plays Boris Yellnikoof, a misanthrope&#8217;s misanthrope and relentless Leftist elitist incapable of humanity or kindness. In a series of unfunny monologues, Boris breaks the <span style="text-decoration: line-through">third</span> fourth wall, acknowledges those of us in the audience and spews the same philosophy on the worthlessness of life that recently drove him out a window in a failed suicide attempt. To anyone within earshot, he&#8217;s an insistent ranter sure he&#8217;s the only one who&#8217;s figured it out because the rest of us worthless insects are embalmed with pop culture and religion.</p>
<p>The former academic who was once &#8220;almost nominated for the Nobel Prize&#8221; lives in a decrepit walk up and teaches chess to kids (actually he hurls insults at them) in order to meet the monthly nut. One night, on his way home, he finds a teenage waif at the bottom of his stairs, Melodie St. Ann Celestine (<a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0939697/">Evan Rachel Wood</a>), a runaway from Mississippi. Before you can say &#8220;Why Does Woody Always Bore Us With This Troubling Obsession of His,&#8221; the sixty-year old Boris marries teen-aged Melodie.</p>
<p>But &#8220;Whatever Works&#8221; is only getting started. Melodie&#8217;s estranged mother and father &#8212; uptight, God-fearing Redstaters played by <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000893/">Ed Begley Jr.</a> and <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0165101/">Patricia Clarkson </a>&#8211; are the next to arrive and fall under the spell of a Bohemian Manhattan. Before long, Allen&#8217;s ham-handed stereotypes give up the Jesus talk and silly country values for the promise of happiness found in divorce, ménage a trios and the long-repressed, inner homosexual.</p>
<p style="text-align: center"><a href="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/07/5.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-176478 aligncenter" src="http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/07/5.jpg" alt="" width="399" height="266" /></a></p>
<p>Allen&#8217;s writing is shockingly lazy. The dialogue plays like something from a high school play with every on-the-nose scene stiffly performed as if over-rehearsed. The characters are worse; paper thin. Other than Rachel Wood, who summons more depth than the script deserves, the usually terrific Clarkson and Begley Jr. seem satisfied playing caricatures, which should come as no surprise. Hollywood bigots, never shy about granting terrorists, Nazis, rapists and child molesters some level of depth and dimension, refuse anything of the kind for us Wal-Mart shopping, Jesus-lovers.</p>
<p>With mixed results, the 74-year old Allen has used stand-ins before but David&#8217;s the worst &#8212; yes even worse than Kenneth Branagh. At least Branagh&#8217;s a talented film actor who brings something to the table above the script. Allen himself brings an unspoken pathos to these characters, even the narcissist in &#8220;Stardust Memories&#8221; and rank bastard in &#8220;Deconstructing Harry.&#8221; David only proves he&#8217;s a television actor, a sitcom guy, whose sitcom schtick never parts its own waters long enough to allow us a glimpse of the human being beneath Boris&#8217;s bile.</p>
<p>Not only is &#8220;Whatever Works&#8221; Allen&#8217;s worst film by a long shot, it&#8217;s an unrelentingly ugly thing that allows for a horrible, cruel and selfish man&#8217;s philosophy to win the day. In the past, even in Allen&#8217;s godless world, a consequence of some kind was meted out to these types, or at least a rotting of the soul was implied. But the man who did more than anyone to lampoon his own kind, those <a href="http://www.filmsite.org/anni2.html">he famously described as</a> the &#8220;New York, Jewish, Left-Wing, Liberal, Intellectual, Central Park West, Brandeis University, Socialist summer camps, and the father with the Ben Shahn drawings&#8221; crowd, appears to be devolving into something that lacks the self-awareness that once made him so unique.</p>
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