The year 2000 was my first living full-time in Los Angeles, having arrived from Atlanta on December 30, 1999, Y2K hysteria be damned. I got a job working as a projectionist at a theatre while also working as a reader for a small production company, and I immediately noticed something about a large number of people in Hollywood: they hate movies.

I have varied tastes, having argued the merits of gross-out comedy vs. Oscar bait type of movies. Everyone I met in the movie business claimed “Election” was their favorite movie of 1999, and the only person I met who had actually seen “Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo” was Rob Schneider’s agent. And he was lukewarm about it.

Total worldwide box office take for “Election” = $16M ($14.8M Domestic).

Total worldwide box office take for “Deuce Bigalow” = $92M ($65M Domestic).

Not bashing either movie; I love them both. But you can see a discrepancy.

Anyway, the nominees for Best Picture:

“Gladiator” – Saw this at the pre-ArcLight Cinerama Dome and was blown away. Still have to watch it on TNT at least one of the thirty-eight times a month they play it.

“Erin Brockovich” – One of my favorite genres: Movies that suck on paper but are actually really good. I never expected the movie to be as funny as it is. Albert Finney wuz robbed. (more…)

Barack Obama’s approval rating is presently a rousing 42%. That means the largest portion of the sane American public would love to see the first family pack up their Samsonites® and head back to the Winfrey City, famous for deep-dish pizza, Mayor Rahm, and the type of thuggish politics the head of the house is obviously comfortable with.

However, President Barack Obama’s latest fundraising report cites an “A-list of Hollywood stars, with donations from some of the top celebrities in the entertainment industry.” Apparently, left-coast liberals want to see to it that the best script reader since Martin Sheen has another shot at practicing lines on set while acting the part of President.

It’s not surprising that Hollywood is smitten with the “Yes We Can” man’s refusal to admit he can’t.  Those in the acting profession are impressed by amateurs like Barry Soetoro (stage name Barack Obama), who has proven to have a professional-level ability to make believe he’s something he is not. Heck, for a season, even Paul Giamatti was convinced he was John Adams.

What could be better for Hollywood than a President who swims around in a policy cesspool similar to the one they refuse to empty in Tinsel Town, overflowing with the squalid water of loose morals, abortion rights, angry feminists, racial indignation, class warfare, and overall elitist hypocrisy? (more…)

It’s difficult to imagine actors upstaging both Julia Roberts and Tom Hanks but that’s what happens in the new film “Larry Crowne.” Starring the two Oscar winners, the light-hearted comedy features several lesser-known stars in small roles that overshadow the two leads. Although the story has a few issues, “Larry Crowne” is a likeable and light-hearted film that doesn’t have aspirations to be anything more.

Tom Hanks, who also directed the film and co-wrote the story with Nia Vardolas, stars as Larry Crowne. Crowne is a “valued” employee at a UMart retail store who is fired early on in the story by a managerial committee. It seems the “U” in “UMart” might stand for university because Crowne is terminated because he didn’t go to college. He had enlisted in the Navy immediately after high school but the company doesn’t care about that.

To ensure that he would never again be fired for not going to college, Crowne enrolls in a local community college.

In college, he enrolls in a class entitled “The Art of Informal Remarks,” which is taught by Mercedes Tainot (Julia Roberts). Tainot is a mildly disgruntled professor who celebrates canceling her classes when there aren’t enough students.  She is unhappily married to a writer (Bryan Cranston), who spends much of his time looking at online porn. The scenes of Tainot’s desperate home life drag down the story but fortunately, there aren’t too many of them. In a story that is meant to be lighthearted and fun, the slow destruction of their marriage provides unnecessarily dramatic moments. Cranston, who previously showed off his comedic abilities in “Malcolm in the Middle,” is completely wasted here. (more…)

It recently dawned on me that even though Hollywood couples often avoid marriage even when they have children together, while others are often married for embarrassingly short periods of time, the movies continue to promote the old-fashioned notion that marriage constitutes a happy ending in every romantic comedy they churn out. They do this because they realize that even though shacking-up and one-night stands are typical for many of them, it does not constitute the norm or the ideal for most people in the audience.

That being the case, you have to wonder why in so many other areas, they go out of their way to ignore or even deride the values and beliefs of most Americans. When it comes to such things as same-sex marriage, tax-funded abortions or the alleged villainy of the U.S. Military, Hollywood is consistently out of step with the majority and they’re darn proud of it.

Often the funniest lines delivered by these celebrities occur when they exchange marriage vows. The most appropriate musical accompaniment isn’t Mendelssohn’s “Wedding March,” but a couple of rim shots after the “I do’s.” On occasion, the marriage is over before the gifts have been unwrapped, sometimes even before the cake has been cut.

For instance, Julia Roberts/Lyle Lovett (21 months); Michael Jackson/Lisa Marie Presley (19 months); Charlie Sheen/Donna Peele (14 months); Jennifer Lopez/Chris Judd (7 months); Pamela Anderson/Kid Rock (5 months); Renee Zellwegger/Kenny Chesney (4 months); Nicolas Cage/Lisa Marie Presley (4 months); Drew Barrymore/Jeremy Thomas (6 weeks); Carmen Electra/Dennis Rodman (9 days); Dennis Hopper/Michelle Phillips (8 days); and, a drum roll, please: Britney Spears/Jason Alexander (55 hours).

Some of these ceremonies no doubt took place at Las Vegas chapels, but a couple of them, I suspect, occurred at local In-N-Out Burger stands, where the marriage certificates came with an order of fries. (more…)

[Ed. Note: What are the odds that the same day I praise this film, this happens? -- JN]

Proving once again that Hollywood always gravitates to the wrong causes, Tim Cavanaugh of Reason.com reported on Dec. 14 that the California town made famous by Erin Brockovich — an activism that Hollywood embraced with a major motion picture starring Julia Roberts — has proven not to have lived up to all the anti-corporate fearmongering that brought the town to the country’s attention.

For those of you that are hazy on the story, local activist Erin Brockovich successfully took Pacific Gas and Electric to court forcing it to pay a record $333 million class-action settlement because it was determined that the company allowed a toxic plume of hexavalent chromium 6 to be released from the natural gas pipeline based in Hinkley, California.

The charge from Brockovich and her supporters was that this cloud of hexavalent chromium 6 was surely going to unleash a wave of devastating cancers on the unsuspecting residents of Hinkley. The courts tended to agree. The court of public opinion also agreed. Interestingly, there wasn’t any real scientific proof to give the contention veracity, but everyone was just sure that increased levels of cancer would befall these poor people. The company lost and paid dearly.

It was just the sort of David vs Goliath story that drew Hollywood to the tale. A 2000 film starring Julia Roberts, one of the highest paid actresses of her day, was crafted to make a hero of Miss Brockovich.

Hollywood loves these anti-corporate stories. From actress Meryl Streep testifying before Congress on the dangers of the chemical Alar on apples and produce, to movies like The China Syndrome, a film about catastrophic safety lapses in the nuclear power industry, even to sci-fi shows like Robocop, a film that made a villain of corporations, Hollywood loves to think of itself as fighting “for the little people.” Sadly, in almost every case the denizens of Hollywood whip up sentiment against things without any truth or proof supporting their position. Meryl Streep was wrong about Alar causing wide-spread cancer, The China Syndrome wholly misrepresented the safety record of the nuclear power industry causing an entire generation of Americans to eschew nuclear power when the rest of the world was fully investing in it (without safety troubles, mind you), and Robocop was simply hyperbole gone wild. Oh, but Hollywood was fighting for you, don’t you know? (more…)

I saw Eat Pray Love over the weekend. I can’t remember the last film I walked out of but I certainly wanted to walk out of this one. I stayed because I want to know what is going in the world. I know now and it’s not good.

The cinema was half full, almost all were women.

The film is deeply depressing. I recently saw Precious, I had avoided it because I thought it would be predictable and depressing. It’s not, even with its subject matter.

However nothing in the cinema this decade has depressed me as much as Eat Pray Love’s hymn to vacuous selfishness. There are 16 year olds who have more profound insights. Talking of 16 year olds, the journey of enlightenment taken by Liz Gilbert (Julia Roberts) in the film is very reminiscent of 16 year old’s experiences; girl meets a boy, falls in love with him, gets bored, chants a bit and meets another boy, bliss.

Back to the story, Eat Pray Love is criminally dull. (more…)

Yes, I know. This post is a few weeks late. Unfortunately I don’t have the time to see everything as soon as it comes out and only caught up with “Salt” and “Eat Pray Love” this last week. So please be kind and rewind your brains to early August. Or pretend that what you’re reading here is a way-early DVD review from a real go-getter. My original plan was to wait for the DVD releases, but that was before witnessing the surprise box-office stamina of “The Expendables.” My expectation was that Stallone’s ode to the 80s would top off somewhere below $80 million, and yet after three weeks of release it continues to chug right along earning another $10 million this weekend for a total of $83 million.

That’s pretty impressive for a non-sequel, non-franchise action film, especially one with the added weight of being R-rated. You’ll never catch me trying to publicly predict the how and why of the box office, but a look at “Salt” and “Eat Pray Love” did bring to mind certain elements of “The Expendables” that helped me to respect it as something more than just a thick-necked gun and run (not that that’s a bad thing) and maybe help somewhat to explain its unexpected shelf-life.

There’s a lot to like about Angelina Jolie’s PG-13 “Salt,” and even though the Oscar-winner looks a little frail to be dispatching nameless henchmen, there’s no doubt she’s one of the few movie stars, male or female, still able to artistically and commercially carry a picture all on her own. Better yet, after a ten-year absence from the action genre, director Philip Noyce returns in fine form with his old-school skill of putting together the kind of exciting action sequences that made Harrison Ford’s two Jack Ryan pictures so memorable. In this awful era of The Paul Greengrass, what a treat it is to comprehend what’s happening during a car chase, what a rarity to enjoy gunfights structured in a way that allow you to understand the geography of who’s killing whom. (more…)

“Eat Pray Love” exists to please lovers of the best-selling book of the same name – and anyone who prefers pretty postcards to nuanced storytelling. It’s heavier than your standard chick-lit adaptation and miles away from any “Sex and the City” shopping montage. No Manolo Blahniks were harmed in the making of this motion picture. But “Love” still can’t find the soul of its main character despite all the hand-wringing and dutiful self examination on display.

Julia Roberts stars as Liz, a writer unsatisfied with her husband (Billy Crudup) and her life in toto. She ditches her man and embarks on a year-long journey to find herself. First, she channels her inner gourmand with a trek to Italy. She bonds with a fellow ex-pat, eats enough pasta to change her pants size and starts leaving the skin of her own life on her rented room’s floor.

Audiences the world over might wish they were emotionally adrift if this is the result.

Her real healing begins when she visits India, where she embarks on a rigorous lifestyle of yoga, meditation and kibitzing with colorful supporting players. Richard Jenkins pilfers an entire swath of the film as a fellow lost traveler, a long, tall Texan with his own emotional scars. The character actor broke through the mainstream with his Oscar-nominated turn in “The Visitor.” Here, he reminds us just how potent he can be with only a few scenes with which to work. (more…)

Pop quiz: what do the following movies have in common?

Gone with the Wind (1939), Star Wars (1977), The Sound of Music (1965), E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial (1982), The Ten Commandments (1956), Titanic (1997), Jaws (1975), Doctor Zhivago (1965), The Exorcist (1973), Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1939), 101 Dalmatians (1961), The Empire Strikes Back (1980), Ben-Hur (1959), Avatar (2009), Return of the Jedi (1983), The Sting (1973), Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981), Jurassic Park (1993), The Graduate (1967), Star Wars: Episode I — The Phantom Menace (1999), Fantasia (1941), The Godfather (1972), Forrest Gump (1994), Mary Poppins (1964), The Lion King (1994)

If you said they all made scads of money, bravo — they are the top twenty-five domestic box-office champions of all time (adjusted for inflation, of course).

But consider another similarity: surprisingly few of them relied on established A-list movie stars — the most famous, the highest paid — for their moneymaking prospects. Gone with the Wind had Gable, yes. The Sting had Newman and Redford. The Godfather, Brando.

As for most of the rest, they either featured no A-listers at all, or used them before they became bonafide movie stars. In fact, many of those pictures can take credit for sending now-famous actors into the celestial Hollywood firmament in the first place. Gone with the Wind made Vivian Leigh known to the world. The Ten Commandments did it for Charlton Heston. The Graduate, Dustin Hoffman. The Godfather, Al Pacino. Star Wars, Harrison Ford. Mary Poppins, Julie Andrews. (more…)

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Finally, the remake of “Under the Tuscan Sun” America’s been clamoring for.

A few years ago one of the most culturally significant cities in the United States ended up under water and millions of Americans rushed to her aid. A lot of conservatives and liberals joined church and civic groups and headed to The Big Easy to help rebuild the city. The Hollywood elites got in front of the cameras and opened their checkbooks, which was great. They also opened their mouths and unloaded on President Bush about his lack of action which I found a bit pompous and hypocritical. Now their hypocrisy has resurfaced. As a friend of mine in Nashville might say, “They have showed their ass.”

Nashville is drowning and Hollywood is nowhere to be found. Country singer Julie Roberts has lost her home and yet Julia Roberts has yet to send help. Julie Roberts wrote my wife’s favorite country song  which goes, ”…men and mascara, always run…” Where are Brad Pitt and the rest of the Hollywood liberal elite who rightfully rushed into New Orleans now that culturally significant sites like The Grand Ole Opry and The Country Music Hall of Fame are under water?

When will Bono write a song? (more…)

I have yet to see a show business person give the acceptance speech they should at the Oscars. Instead, some turn the moment into a narcissistic stunt of protest, global outrage or badge of honor for whatever social injustice they have chosen that year. Rarely do they get it right.

Peachiness is nothing new to Oscar; it has been going on as far back as when those in Tinseltown hid in a Red closet while whispering “Government borscht for all.” The only thing that’s changed is the lack of awareness the winners have to the people who pay for their product, the product being they and their films, and the level of daftness that some accepting the award go to in an effort to feel more powerful than the money and fame they already have. Speaking out can be a good thing, especially when the speakers motive is to lift the awareness of all. Yet in Hollywood, a self-important attitude is hard for most to drop, as is the party line.

Last year, Sean Penn, a man with numerous felony charges including charges of violence against woman, and one who panders to tyrants the world over, preached to Americans after his win of the horrible and hateful state of mind that has fallen upon those who do not see the world as he does. The people of California came to their decision on gay marriage freely by vote, twice. Nevertheless, to Sean Penn the will of the people is only ever served when it slants in his favor or gives way to a photo op of him in a New Orleans boat shotgun in hand. Even his recent Haiti trip ultimately became just a reason for him to have face time on Larry King while hitting “Wiffle Ball” questions out of the park in the hopes of improving his public image, which is limited.

More often winners become so emotional that they lose it on stage like a Springer Spaniel wetting the carpet of its Masters home. Then becoming unable to articulate an awareness needed to give an educated speech in regards to the character they portrayed and how that role may be transferred to a larger audience for greater exposure. The speech they should have given gets lost in the moment of the self. (more…)

Perhaps more than any other holiday, Valentine’s Day is a love-it-or-hate-it proposition. Unfortunately for prospective moviegoers, the new movie “Valentine’s Day” will provoke a universal sense of disappointment and dread.

Packing 19 name actors from diverse age groups (high schoolers through grandparents are followed) into a series of intertwining vignettes set on the titular day, and topping it all with direction by the legendary rom-com master Garry Marshall (“Pretty Woman,” “Runaway Bride”), “VD” (an acronym that sadly reflects how unpleasant the viewing experience winds up being) should be an instant classic along the lines of 2003’s vastly superior “Love Actually.” Unfortunately, the filmmakers spent so much time negotiating with actors that they forgot to find a script with characters worth giving a hoot about. (more…)

One day … ONE day after gushing over how exciting the recession is now that those forced to work jobs they hate or who have lost them entirely can focus on their passions, Natalie Portman bought herself a $3 million castle-like estate.

Natalie, whoever’s advising you … fire them. If no one’s advising you, find someone who doesn’t carry a small dog in their purse or dates someone who does. Look to the real world for help. Look to someone who’s spent a few years in a land where the zip codes don’t start with “9-0.” Someone who cares enough about you and your career to say (without any “Honey, babys”):

“Nat, past the gates of your community and away from the hills of Hollywood losing your job doesn’t fuel passion, it fuels despair, and working a job you hate is almost as bad because of the big black  permanent ball of dread it plants in your gut. I know you dig Barack, I did too before he targeted my children and health care, but you can’t flak for his recession. That’s what the mainstream media is for. You have to empathize with your audience, build goodwill. Besides, you’re closing on that castle tomorrow, so today wouldn’t be a good time to get all gushy over how exciting Barack’s recession is. And if you do, I quit.” (more…)

She has a hit TV show on the Disney Channel, a pair of albums that have debuted at #1 on the Billboard charts, a concert tour with 69 sold-out arenas in North America, and now a second #1 movie in as many years. Miley Cyrus is the biggest teen star in the world.

With most of Hollywood (including myself) expecting an opening in the mid-$20M’s for Hannah Montana The Movie (Disney), Miley has surprised “grown-ups” with her box office clout once again. The picture opened with a heavily front-loaded $17.39M on Good Friday then dropped 40% on Saturday to an estimated $10.34M, and it will reach an estimated $34M by the end of Easter weekend, making it the all-time #2 opening for the bunny holiday weekend. My Friday night early 3-day projection was for $33.6M, but then I raised my number to $39M on Saturday. As it turns out, I should have stuck with my first pass. These young skewing movies are tricky to project, and the Easter Weekend, where Saturday traditionally drops from Friday, makes it even more complicated.

(more…)

Easter weekend 2009 will almost certainly be an all-time record-breaker for Hollywood with a pair of new releases that could be among the top six bunny holiday openings of all time. Although neither Hannah Montana: The Movie (Disney) or the new R-rated comedy Observe & Report (Warner Bros) will challenge 2006’s all-time Easter weekend opening champion Scary Movie 4 ($40.2M), both new offerings look very solid in pre-release industry tracking, and they will be joined by some strong holdovers.

Universal’s Fast & Furious is likely to cross the finish line first for a second consecutive weekend, following up last weekend’s almost $71M with about $30M, which would mark a 58% drop. Still, it must be considered a triumph that the re-teaming of Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jordana Brewster and Michelle Rodriguez may have $120M in US sales after just 10 days. That will mean that Fast & Furious will have almost doubled the domestic gross of The Fast & The Furious: Tokyo Drift (the last film in the franchise), and this souped-up thrill ride could be headed for $160M US.

(more…)

I was head of the film and broadcast department for a talent agency in the Detroit Metro area. As a casting agent my job was to get the character breakdowns, hold auditions and cast roles for film, TV and radio. My staff and I cast Zebrahead, Hoffa, Renaissance Man to name a few and many award winning commercials. I left the casting biz to coach voice-over artists and produce their CD’s, along with doing free-lance talent coordination for ad-agencies, where I negotiate celebrity talent.

I recently read Apocalypse Near? Liberal Actresses Line Up to Star in ‘Atlas Shrugged’  by Pam Meister and wanted to offer the perspective of someone who has experience in casting. The post told of Julia Roberts and Angelina Jolie having an interest in the role of Dagny Taggert. It was offered up, and several commenter’s mentioned that they feared Julia Roberts might change the script to reflect her liberal viewpoint. I don’t really think that should be a concern because many times certain actors are mentioned only to create buzz for a project, or to get their name out there, or both. I believe such is the case with Julia Roberts in this story. (more…)

With 400,000 Americans showing up every year at the Indy 500 and 200,000 more buying tickets to see NASCAR’s premiere event The Daytona 500, you would think that the most creative minds in Hollywood would be looking for a way to cash in with more movies about car racing and car culture. NASCAR has an estimated 75 million fans, and it is second only to the National Football League in terms of television ratings, so where are all the good racing movies?

Jordana Brewster is reunited with Vin, Paul and Michelle in FAST & FURIOUS

Universal seems to have answered that question by getting its successful street racing franchise back into the fast lane this weekend with Fast & Furious. The movie, which reunites Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Jordana Brewster and Michelle Rodriguez for the first time since 2001’s original surprise blockbuster, has exploded to a high octane $30.11M or so on Friday and that could mean a $70M opening weekend. That would make it the all-time #1 opening for a car racing movie.

(more…)

First off, let me ask the question: in today’s PC, non-sexualized world, am I allowed to use the word “actress?” I guess I’ll chance it.

My friend Kitty sent me this link to an article about the ongoing saga of turning the 1,100 page book “Atlas Shrugged,” by Ayn Rand, into a feature film:

Rand’s popular but polarizing book — it’s derided by many literary critics but has a huge public following — tells the story of Dagny Taggart, a railroad executive trying to keep her corporation competitive in the face of what she perceives as a lack of innovation and individual responsibility. (more…)