“Music was my salvation really, and always has been.” – Joey Ramone

Years ago, a young woman sat across from me on a near-empty train. She looked like she had been crying. Pulling her sweatshirt sleeves down over her hands, she leaned her head against the window, a distant look on her swollen and scarlet countenance.

I was listening to the Ramones at the time, and took a chance. I moved over to the seat next to her and said hello. She seemed shocked by the abrupt intrusion, but very quickly recovered and managed to make some small talk with me. After a few moments, I offered my headphones:

“You wanna hear something?” I asked.

She took my measure for a long moment before, against what was surely her better judgment, slipping the headphones on. I pressed play and Cretin Hop poured into her head. After a second she put her hands over the phones, drawing the music further in. Beat on the Brat followed; she listened for a minute, then, mirabile dictu, her lips unfolded like tiny wings and a smile took flight on her face.

“I’ve never heard this,” she said, too loud.

“I know,” said I.

“Who is it?”

“The Ramones.”

“What are you, their agent?”

(more…)

This is the story of how I got kicked out of Hollywood…and how I hope to kick myself back in again. 

From the late 70’s to early 90s I made my living as a Hollywood screenwriter. I’m best known as co-writer of cult film Rock ‘n’ Roll High School, which features the seminal punk band The Ramones. 

My writing partner and I worked every day on the set of the film, and we spent a lot of time with the band, including a 22-hour marathon Ramones concert at the Roxy on the Sunset Strip. As a souvenir of that day, I still carry around a 40% hearing loss and white-noise tinnitus in both ears. 

Over the years, I’ve been approached by many Ramones fans wanting to know what it was like to work with band members Joey, Johnny, Dee Dee and Ringo. Of the four, the most interesting, approachable and, yes, intelligent glue-sniffer was Johnny Ramone, and my partner and I would often spend time talking with him about his film collection and our shared affection for Buster Keaton movies.  (more…)