Natalie Portman’s Castle and Why the Movie Star is Dead

One day … ONE day after gushing over how exciting the recession is now that those forced to work jobs they hate or who have lost them entirely can focus on their passions, Natalie Portman bought herself a $3 million castle-like estate.

Natalie, whoever’s advising you … fire them. If no one’s advising you, find someone who doesn’t carry a small dog in their purse or dates someone who does. Look to the real world for help. Look to someone who’s spent a few years in a land where the zip codes don’t start with “9-0.” Someone who cares enough about you and your career to say (without any “Honey, babys”):

“Nat, past the gates of your community and away from the hills of Hollywood losing your job doesn’t fuel passion, it fuels despair, and working a job you hate is almost as bad because of the big black  permanent ball of dread it plants in your gut. I know you dig Barack, I did too before he targeted my children and health care, but you can’t flak for his recession. That’s what the mainstream media is for. You have to empathize with your audience, build goodwill. Besides, you’re closing on that castle tomorrow, so today wouldn’t be a good time to get all gushy over how exciting Barack’s recession is. And if you do, I quit.” (more…)

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Tags: "District 9”, "Twitter Effect", academy awards, Castle, Christian Bale
Posted Sep 5th 2009 at 9:52 am in Celebrity News, Classic Hollywood, Featured Story, Politics | 218402194 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/09/05/update-natalie-exciting-recession-portman-buys-castle-like-estate/Natalie+Portman%27s+Castle+and+Why+the+Movie+Star+is+Dead2009-09-05+16%3A52%3A07John+Nolte

Lonewolf Diaries: Hollywood Men, Grow a Pair and Marry the Dame!

“Marriage is just a title,” “It’s a prejudice institution,” or my personal favorite, “I don’t need a piece of paper to prove my love.” We hear these nice little soundbytes from the cowardly men of Hollywood time and time again. Even more sadly, is that all too often, their leading ladies are conned into going along with it. Women, what are you thinking?! Don’t you realize that these chumps are playing you like a fiddle?

I was a groomsman at one of my best friend’s wedding this weekend. As I gazed across at the Bridesmaids all teary-eyed with an air of longing, I couldn’t help but think to myself, “Man, Johnny Depp’s a douche.” The truth is that behind every anti-marriage sermon given from a Hollywood hubby, there’s an incredibly disappointed lady. I don’t care how much of a “strong, independent woman” you are; all little girls dream of their perfect wedding day. Before the feminists get upset, let me tell you that none of this comes from a place of sexism. It comes from an endeared heart. It’s why little boys would rather play “Space Aliens” and little girls would rather play “House.” Your inherent ability for compassion and nurturing is what makes you the best among us. (more…)

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Tags: Brad Pitts, feminism, Johnny Depp, kurt russell, marriage
Posted Aug 25th 2009 at 5:28 pm in Culture, Lone Wolf Diaries | 211550274 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/scrowder/2009/08/25/lonewolf-diaries-hollywood-men-grow-a-pair-and-marry-the-dame/Lonewolf+Diaries%3A+Hollywood+Men%2C+Grow+a+Pair+and+Marry+the+Dame%212009-08-26+00%3A28%3A09Steven+Crowder

Daily Gut: The Prince of Darkness is Dead

Otherwise known as Robert Novak, this gnome-like figure dominated the political talk show landscape throughout the late 80’s and 90’s – as a panelist for “The McLaughlin Group,” and later the “Capital Gang.”

So, was Robert Novak the coolest man on the planet?

Of course not. But in my opinion, he deserves to be in the top 100.
Or, at least, ahead of anyone in Green Day. See, Robert Novak epitomized cool because he never cared about what people thought. Instead he stole the left’s stereotype of conservatism, and made it his own delightful persona. If being a fan of free markets, a strong defense and limited government made him evil, then evil he was.

And so he became the “Prince of Darkness.” And like the devil – he never changed. Novak never moved with the trends: he looked like Novak for a solid five decades short, round, dark, joyfully evil: for all we knew, he could have been an alien marble that survived on puppy souls. (more…)

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Tags: "Capital Gang", "The McLaughlin Group", Green Day, Hunter S. Thompson, Johnny Depp
Posted Aug 18th 2009 at 11:14 am in Daily Gut, News, Politics | 20743052 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/ggutfeld/2009/08/18/daily-gut-the-prince-of-darkness-is-dead/Daily+Gut%3A+The+Prince+of+Darkness+is+Dead2009-08-18+18%3A14%3A58Greg+Gutfeld

Reporting From Comic-Con: Lou Ferrigno Beats Arnold After All

Today I got to meet the grown son of the man who gave me my first entertainment job in 1991. He said he was a big fan of Earthworm Jim and I told him there would be a very good chance my most famous character wouldn’t have existed without his dad.

Twenty years ago a retired lady bumped into me while I was in line to see “Who Framed Roger Rabbit?” when she said, “Oh, you like to draw? You should come to the San Diego Comic Con. Here’s two free passes.” She came to my booth today and I gave her a big hug.

I had over ten young industry professionals who work in comics, animation and video games and tell me that they decided to learn to draw because they liked my work. An incredible 25-year-old Russian kid said that he was raised on a pirate version of my game, “The Neverhood,” I did with Dreamworks in the mid ’90s. I looked at his comic pages and he could draw better than I could. I drew a character for him and he gave up a tear. (more…)

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Tags: "Alice In Wonderland", "Chumble Spuzz", "Pumping Iron", "The Neverhood", Arnold Schwarzenegger
Posted Jul 24th 2009 at 1:56 pm in Art, Entertainment | 19102220 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/dtennapel/2009/07/24/reporting-from-comic-con-lou-ferrigno-beats-arnold-after-all/Reporting+From+Comic-Con%3A+Lou+Ferrigno+Beats+Arnold+After+All2009-07-24+20%3A56%3A45Doug+TenNapel

‘Public Enemies’ Deserves a Second Look

Michael Mann’s Public Enemies was one of the most anticipated films of the year (Read my Parcbench review here, John Nolte’s slightly opposing view here). However, it seems that many critics are drastically underrating this film. This is unfortunate because even though the film may not be the gangster movie we are used to; it sure has hints of perfection throughout. After reading many reviews panning this film, I decided to give it a second look.

There were still some obvious flaws. There are a couple of choppy edits as well as questionable music in the scene where Dillinger walks into the cop shop. But the flaws most people discuss don’t seem to be a true flaw at all. I’ve heard and read many people say the film has no depth and the characters are shallow. This is simply not a fair assertion.

The film may appear shallow to some, but it doesn’t give us anything we don’t need to know. That is exactly what makes this film enjoyable; there is no abundance of useless information. It is about Dillinger’s short time as public enemy number one, nothing more. (more…)

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Tags: "Public Enemies", Dillinger, gangster movies, Johnny Depp, Michael Mann
Posted Jul 23rd 2009 at 4:28 pm in Classic Hollywood, Film | 18843022 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/cyogerst/2009/07/23/why-some-may-be-wrong-about-public-enemies/%27Public+Enemies%27+Deserves+a+Second+Look2009-07-23+23%3A28%3A10Chris+Yogerst

Review: ‘Public Enemies’

Striving for cinematic greatness is always a risky proposition. The risk is that when you fall short there’s no mistaking the swing-and-a-miss. To his credit, this is the position Director Michael Mann loves to put himself in. He always strives, always puts himself out there and the result is a number of unforgettable films but also a few obvious and glaring misses. “Public Enemies” misses. Not as badly as “Miami Vice” or “Ali,” but other than a couple of sequences, “Enemies” never gels, grabs, bites or takes hold. Instead, the narrative just kind of rolls along hitting insistent beats en-route to the inevitable.

Johnny Depp is John Dillinger, a criminal before crime was organized who specializes in bank robberies and jail breaks. His dash, audacity and refusal to steal from the common folk has made him something of a folk hero to Depression-weary America, but J. Edgar Hoover (Billy Crudup) sees an opportunity to use Dillinger’s exploits as a way to firm up his fledgling national police force (the F.B.I.), but first he’ll have to prove his modern, centralized methods work. (more…)

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Tags: "Public Enemies", Baby Face Nelson, Christian Bale, Frank Nitti, John Dillinger
Posted Jul 1st 2009 at 6:18 pm in Featured Story, Reviews | 17531425 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/07/01/review-public-enemies/Review%3A+%27Public+Enemies%272009-07-02+01%3A18%3A37John+Nolte

‘Taken’: The World’s Oldest Profession is Father

He is a man with a gun. He is a killer, a slayer. Patient and gentle as he is, he is a slayer. Self-effacing, self-forgetting, still he is a killer. . . All the other stuff, the love, the democracy, the floundering into lust, is a sort of by-play. The essential American soul is hard, isolate, stoic, and a killer. It has never yet melted. — D. H. Lawrence, Studies in Classic American Literature (1923)

Every once in awhile an action film comes along that revives. That proves that — no matter how strong the political correctness of an age, no matter how pale and pathetic its notions of masculinity, no matter how much Ritalin is force-fed to little boys, no matter how many toy guns, xylophone mallets, and Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots get banned from stores and playgrounds — there are certain aspects of the male soul that are inviolate, and certain primal yearnings that are evergreen. Taken (2008) is one of those films, and its release last week on DVD and Blu-ray should be heralded by lovers of all things red-blooded, hairy-chested, and morally sound.

When this movie appeared in the doldrums of Hollywood’s off-season, it was expected to die a quick death in a marketplace filled with audiences either too sophisticated or too sophomoric to respond. Modern theatergoers, the theory goes, increasingly want their “heroes” to be either brooding Abercrombie & Fitch nymphets like Leonardo DiCaprio and Matt Damon, feckless stumblebums like Ben Stiller and Paul Blart: Mall Cop’s Kevin James, quirky class cut-ups like Robert Downey Jr. and Johnny Depp, or silly video-game tough guys like Jason Statham, Vin Diesel, and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. When an actor does put some honest testosterone in his performance — Daniel Craig in Munich (2005), Clint Eastwood in Gran Torino (2008) — it’s inevitably to make a much larger point about violence breeding only more violence, all of it equally reprehensible, a product of way too many pesky males wreaking havoc in primitive bursts of knuckle-dragging temper. (more…)

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Tags: ben stiller, Claudia Barlow, Clint Eastwood, D. H. Lawrence, daniel craig
Posted May 20th 2009 at 8:04 am in Entertainment, Featured Story | 138886One Commenthttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/lgrin/2009/05/20/the-worlds-oldest-profession/%27Taken%27%3A+The+World%27s+Oldest+Profession+is+Father2009-05-20+15%3A04%3A02Leo+Grin

Killing Hollywood Pirates One by One

They plunder. They kidnap. They ransom. They steal. They kill. They are destroying the fabric of world civilization.

They are pirates, and piracy must be stopped.

Yes, Hollywood is filled with terrible individuals that must be reigned in.

Sure, I could blame Somalia for the problem, but they are starving. I blame Hollywood for glorifying pirates everywhere.

Therefore, the solution is to crack down on piracy at the source. (more…)

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Tags: gitmo, Hollywood pirates, Jack Nicholson, Johnny Depp, Obama
Posted Apr 16th 2009 at 6:39 am in Political Humor | 106614No Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/egolub/2009/04/16/killing-hollywood-pirates-one-by-one/Killing+Hollywood+Pirates+One+by+One2009-04-16+13%3A39%3A09Eric+Golub

Trailer: Public Enemies

That is one outstanding trailer and the first footage I’ve seen.

This era’s always proved difficult for present-day filmmakers to credibly recreate.  One major exception is “L.A. Confidential” (1997), but the rest, most notably Scorsese’s ridiculously over-praised “The Aviator“ (2004), overtax your suspension of disbelief with a sense that everyone’s play-acting with clothes found in grandma’s attic. Director Michael Mann appears to have figured out that stylizing the hell out of it is the way to go. The music and atmosphere make you want to dive right in. (more…)

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Tags: "Public Enemies", Christian Bale, J. Edgar Hoover, Johnny Depp, l.a. confidential
Posted Apr 10th 2009 at 11:26 am in Entertainment, Video | 102806No Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/04/10/trailer-public-enemies/Trailer%3A+Public+Enemies2009-04-10+18%3A26%3A17John+Nolte

Summer Movie Season: The Good, the Bad and the Maybe

No matter how frustrated, disappointed, or outright disgusted Hollywood makes me, all is forgiven during that brief moment just after the trailers finish and just before the film begins. When those lights dim the chip dissolves from my shoulder and all the filmmaker need do to win me forever is tell one helluva story.

Politics shmolitics… Just take me away.

For we hopeless movie lovers, each year hope (if you’ll pardon the expression) springs eternal with a fresh offering of pull-out-the-stops-studio-balance-sheet-in-the-crosshairs slate of tent poles. And for that reason, this is my favorite part of the movie year because all I want for my ten bucks is to get lost for a couple hours, and from May 1st through the end of August filmdom at least attempts to put the political nonsense on hold to do just that. (more…)

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Tags: 3, Bruno, Christian Bale, Denzel Washington, george clooney
Posted Apr 9th 2009 at 1:09 pm in Entertainment | 1017142 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/04/09/summer-movie-season-the-good-the-bad-and-the-maybe/Summer+Movie+Season%3A+The+Good%2C+the+Bad+and+the+Maybe2009-04-09+20%3A09%3A31John+Nolte

The All-Time Top 10 Movie Posters (one man’s opinion) – #1 JAWS, #2 CHINATOWN, #3 THE DARK KNIGHT

Over the weekend, I was pondering why the low budget, standard genre pic The Haunting in Connecticut (Lionsgate) has become a nifty little box office hit. The film added almost $9.5M over the weekend for a new 10-day cume of $37M, and the only conclusion I have been able to reach is that it’s all about the poster.

Creepy, right? I have not seen Haunting and will probably wait for DVD or pay cable, but that is a weird, startling, attention-grabbing image. As a movie junkie, I love good movie art. The best movie posters are evocative. They capture what a movie is all about without giving away the mystery. There are certain movie posters that instantly put me back in that theatre experiencing the film for the very first time. The best movie posters are not just promotional tools. They stand as a work of art on their own. These are my favorites, buit it is by no means a definitive list. Feel free to add your favorites (and subtract any of mine).

(more…)

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Tags: 2001: a space odyssey, a clockwork orange, academy award, alan ball, alfred hitchcock
Posted Apr 6th 2009 at 8:27 pm in Entertainment, Featured Story, Steve Mason's Box Office | 9912237 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/smason/2009/04/06/posters/The+All-Time+Top+10+Movie+Posters+%28one+man%27s+opinion%29+-+%231+JAWS%2C+%232+CHINATOWN%2C+%233+THE+DARK+KNIGHT2009-04-07+03%3A27%3A28Steve+Mason

Guess Who’s the Third Most Popular Movie Star in America Today?

No, it’s not any of those celebrities we’re told are stars. DiCaprio and George Clooney didn’t even make the top 10. Neither did Ashton Kutcher, Sean Penn, Brad Pitt, Seth Rogen, Matt Damon, Will Farrell, or Tom Cruise.

Every year for about 15 years now, Harris Interactive has conducted a nationwide poll and asked a very simple question: “Who is your favorite movie star?” And every year since the taking of the poll one particular individual has placed in the top ten — 13 of those years in the top 3.

This year, 2,388 U.S. adults were surveyed and this star rose three places to tie Will Smith for third. Only Denzel Washington and Clint Eastwood rank as more popular.

One last hint before the reveal: This star is the only actor in the history of the poll to rank posthumously: (more…)

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Tags: Harris Interactive, Harris Movie Star Poll, Harris Poll, Harris Poll John Wayne, john wayne
Posted Mar 18th 2009 at 2:16 pm in Entertainment, Politics | 83554180 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jjmnolte/2009/03/18/guess-whos-the-third-most-popular-movie-star-in-america-today/Guess+Who%27s+the+Third+Most+Popular+Movie+Star+in+America+Today%3F2009-03-18+21%3A16%3A50John+Nolte