The following article contains spoilers. You’ve been warned.

Hey everyone! I can’t tell you how much I’ve wanted to write this review for y’all. Do you know why? Because teenage sex! And homosexual sex! And does it get any more controversial than teenage homosexual sex?

If it does, then I don’t want to know about it.

Anyway, this week’s episode of “Glee” was set to the music of “West Side Story,” which emulates perfectly the forbidden love of Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet.” Seriously, who doesn’t love a good Pyramus and Thisbe story?

As was dramatized in previews and therefore on the Internet… this week was a week of firsts. First time to shock us? No. First time to push the barriers? No.

But it was the first time that two of the couples on the show had sex. (more…)

You know the problem with the arts these days? In case you didn’t know, Philip Kennicott will be happy to tell you. The problem with the arts, he says, is that they’re homophobic.

Quit laughing.

In a recent Washington Post column, Kennicott takes issue with “a litany of shameful events and grievances” committed against homosexuals in the arts, from “the ‘super-macho’ ethos of the American abstract expressionists” to the recent removal of an explicit exhibit from the Smithsonian Museum. Basically, he believes that despite the disproportionate contributions of homosexuals to the arts world, the arts world has failed to honor them appropriately. And he believes that the only way to do this is to make sure that museums are upfront about (1) the sexual proclivities of artists and their subjects, and (2) the subjects’ role, if any, “the iconography of same-sex eroticism.”

For instance, since Saint Sebastian has been appropriated as a homosexual icon, museums are supposed to mention this wherever they display paintings of him. Never mind that he was not himself homosexual.

And if all this openness makes museums seem a little less “family friendly” to some, well, they just need to get with the times. “‘Family’ is now understood to include gay parents, married gay couples and people with gay children, and the absence of basic information about the role of same-sex desire in art history has become an overt sin of omission,” Kennicott explains. Because society is now more accepting of various forms of sexuality, clearly, kids need more sexual information shoved in their faces! (Since, you know, they’re not getting enough of it already from the culture around them.) (more…)

College drop-out know-it-all, do-it-all Gwyneth Paltrow is the epitome of a spoiled Hollywood brat who was raised in privilege, never told no, and made to believe her every thought was brilliant. The Paltrows must have been the type of liberal parents who handed out trophies to the losing soccer team, because daughter Gwyneth is a hopeless victim of undeserved “Good job-ism” gone wild.

An average kid with moderate talent, since her late teens, between acting, mothering, cooking, and singing, Gwyneth Paltrow has subjected America to incessant rounds of painful “No wait…let me start again,” off-tempo renditions of Für Elise followed by impromptu tap-dancing exhibitions by a grown woman who might as well be dressed in a tight pink tutu.

Gwynie (I like to call her Gwynie) is an attractive woman with a superior gift of imitating British accents.  Ms. Paltrow started her career in Hollywood when her mother, actress Blythe Danner, and her father, the late director Bruce Paltrow, together with family friend Steven Spielberg brokered a deal and got her a starring gig in the movies at 19 years of age.

An unabashed recipient of Hollywood nepotism, after winning an Academy Award for Shakespeare in Love Gwyneth was crowned the “Muse” of Miramax studios by film producer Harvey Weinstein.  Since that day, Gwyneth has been nothing short of unbearable.

Raised in Massachusetts, Gwynie moved back to Los Angeles where her career and love life with Brad Pitt took off. Paltrow traveled the world, and now speaks British-style English, French, Spanish, and a little Italian. Gwen even married a temperamental British rock star – Chris Martin of Coldplay – who she’d never have met without the benefit of a VIP backstage pass.

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That chill wind Hollywood liberal Tim Robbins warned about is indeed blowing and every stand-up comic and performance artist should be worried. However, it isn’t coming from some frustrated, prudish Christian right winger. It’s coming from the open-minded, diversity embracing, tolerant other side of the aisle. Free speech is just a concept that was rejected at the pitch meeting. Artistic expression isn’t for the less enlightened. Tracy Morgan is now officially under reeducation by the Hollywood left.

In case you missed it, here is the back story: Tracy Morgan, stand-up comic and one of the stars of the NBC hit sit-com “30 Rock” was busted doing a stand-up routine at the Ryman Theater in Nashville. Unlike back when St. Lenny was being busted the cops didn’t rush the stage and drag Mr. Morgan off. No, a single audience member got offended and reported Mr. Morgan to “the authorities” through Facebook.

The verboten topic was lack of empathy for homosexuality. The “authorities” are the liberal media. A gay man in the audience, Kevin Rogers took offence and wound up on CNN chatting about how horrible the show was.

I wasn’t there and I doubt there is a recording or transcript but from reports the “bit” was pretty raw. What I have read and seen on the Internet is that Mr. Morgan was doing a rant where he imagined his son came home and announced he was gay. Mr. Morgan said if that happened he would stab him.

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I’ve always been a little wary about indie superstar Sufjan Stevens. I first heard his music at an informational meeting for the philosophy club at my Baptist school (turns out it was a hangout for all the self-superior leftists with beards on campus). His albums-about-the-states projects have seemed too calculated, inorganic, self-congratulating-ly clever. In his “The Great Sufjan Song Xmas Xchange!” contest, he picked the lamest possible song as the winner (full disclosure:  I entered and am a bad loser). Recently, in a notorious interview (where he was the interviewer), Stevens delivered a bizarre, “poor-me” monologue hinting towards retiring from music because albums—nay, the very concept of songs!—were dying, if not already dead.

Cover art by Royal Roberts

Yet at the end of the day, Stevens always redeems himself.  The holier-than-thou social gospel-ers at my school were right to put him on because he’s one of the only Christians in the music world who isn’t a total embarrassment. His work, however immense and lofty it gets, sounds so meticulous because he’s agonized over and found the best possible way to arrange and express his ideas. Regardless of his inexplicably lame choice, his “Song Xchange” contest was an unprecedented event, connecting artist and fans in a way that never would have been possible before the Internet.  And, most importantly, he hasn’t retired from music or tried to redefine albums or whatever he was getting at.

After numerous side projects, he’s following up the universally-acclaimed Illinois with his first proper album since 2005– The Age of Adz– and he’s surpassed his previous work by light years. I came into Adz fully expecting to be the cynical contrarian I was to The Suburbs, but within one playthrough I knew I was listening to an inspired masterwork by a supremely gifted artist. (more…)

So the other night I announced plans to build a gay bar catering to Islamic men, near the proposed mosque site near Ground Zero.

The goal? To echo the mosque’s own website, which says it’s trying to promote integration and tolerance. I figured, I could return the favor, by opening a gay bar.

After all, Islam despises homosexuality – and this Muslim-friendly gay bar would help mend fences.

Right now the working name of the bar is Heaven and Halal. It will be two floors – one serving Hallel food, and other other serving cocktails. There will be 72 of them. And they will be virgin.

So here’s an update, since last night. (more…)

When I first started contributing to Big Hollywood, one of the rules I set for myself was to never discuss non-political figures, specifically folks in Hollywood.  There is plenty to write about without insulting members of the industry you are trying to work in.  So, in writing today about Roman Polanski, my purpose is not to malign the child-raping son-of-a-bitch himself, but to discuss the broader cultural ramifications of Hollywood’s support for his vile, child-raping son-of-a-bitchery.

The Founders of this nation understood full-well that a nation of liberty could not long survive without a strong moral foundation.  If government exists to control people, then limited government naturally would control them very little.  The potential upside was tremendous.  If allowed to live free, a human being might pursue their own interests to the betterment of all of society.  Freedom means a man might strive, risk, and fail, but it also meant that he might strive, risk, and succeed.  As this process played out over time, it might well become the single greatest engine for innovation and wealth creation in all of human history.  (more…)

Director Ang Lee’s films tackle a wide variety of ostensible subjects and genres, but they’re consistent in conveying antinomian-individualist platitudes.

After his big international success with the superb martial arts saga “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon,” Chinese-born film director Ang Lee continued in the eclectic manner indicated by his earlier films, jumping from genre to genre and style to style. Over the years he has directed the genial “Sense and Sensibility,” the thoughtful historical film “Ride with the Devil,” the gloomy family drama “The Ice Storm,” the homosexual love story “Brokeback Mountain,” and the inept superhero action film Hulk, among others.

This eclecticism and the tendency toward a rather downbeat style have kept Lee from developing a large following among U.S. moviegoers, as has the fact that he tends not to work with the top stars or in popular genres. Thus it was perhaps to be expected that his latest, the historical comedy “Taking Woodstock,” didn’t do much business at U.S. movie theaters in its opening weekend, taking in only $3.7 million and finishing ninth in the box office standings. (more…)

Proving once again its claim to the hotly contested title of Stupidest Television Network, ABC has canceled “The Goode Family” and “Surviving Suburbia,” continuing their business strategy of desperately trying new things and failing to give them a chance to succeed.

No wonder the cab/sat USA Network actually beat ABC (and the CW network) in the national ratings last week. USA’s formula of original series with unusual but likable characters and sound values carries consistently impressive audience appeal.

Although the ABC cancellations were expected–given the fact that the network had brilliantly moved both series to Friday night, a network television Dead Zone, thus guaranteeing that the shows would not be able to generate an audience over time–they nonetheless prove that ABC hates anything with decent values and ideas and cannot appreciate good, solid entertainment with real sense (Castle being the rare exception). (more…)

As the Most Powerful Community Organizer in the world pushes through his vision for your future healthcare, his minions are hard at work. Myriad press outlets are blaming fat folks for the rise in healthcare costs. In Obamaland, fat is the new smoking! How and what you eat is the next evil behavior to be controlled by law!

Here is the reason: in the future if you do not conform to the health police’s standards you will be denied access to healthcare. You smokers and drinkers, you fatties and stoners, you are a drag on the system. Your behavior is making you cost too much so go to the end of the government rationing line and hope we get to you. You oldsters and people with chronic conditions take a pain pill. You are a bad risk for successful treatment. In fact, why don’t you do us all a favor and take the whole bottle of pills and check out! (more…)

I’m sure that I’ll get some heat for this, but I feel it is timely to say… Folks, it’s okay to find flamboyant homosexuality funny. Somewhere along the “common sense line,” people have started to equate the ability to find the humor in life with hate speech. Does the idea (note: I didn’t say content) of a movie like “Bruno” offend you? Do you feel that the idea of somebody chuckling over a flamingly over-the-top gay man to be so repulsive that it borders on hatred? To you I say “Nay”! Read on to find out why.

Let me be the first to say it. My name is Steven Crowder and I happen to find blatant gayness funny. I mean really funny. I can remember my first “gay encounter” as a child. I was watching the Macy’s parade on Thanksgiving morning. Al Roker was interviewing Richard Simmons. As nothing more than a wide-eyed four-year-old, I was completely vexed. Here was a man on my television set, complete with chest-hair and quadriceps fuzz. He was just…“off” to me for some reason. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it until the light bulb in my underdeveloped noggin turned on. “Hey Dad,” I asked. “Why does that man act like a woman?”

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If you haven’t heard of Adam Lambert, you will soon.  He is the flamboyant rocker who recently came in second on “American Idol” in a stunning upset by boy-next-door Kris Allen.  Adam, the judges’ obvious favorite throughout the show, is a 27-year-old actor-singer who was struggling to make it in the music business until “Idol” came along.  A former cast-member of “Wicked,” Adam worked in various Broadway touring groups and avant garde shows in order to pay his rent.  But his real dream was to become a pop-rock star.

Adam has an amazing vocal range and a falsetto so rich in quality that it is imperceptibly different from his chest voice.  His incredible ability to control his vocals enables him to hold his high notes seemingly forever.  His versatility is unmatched in “Idol” history.  With the arguable exception of country music (his rendition of “Ring of Fire” received strong emotional reactions both pro and con, as it was more like Johnny Cash doing Goth music with Middle Eastern undertones), Adam excels in every genre of music.  He sings soulful ballads to pop to heavy metal and glam rock, all with ease, style, and pitch-perfect tone. (more…)

This week’s Washington Times column:

Here we go again. The latest poster conservative for political-correctness-run-amok in a country careening downhill on left-wing, Democratic cruise control is Republican congresswoman Virginia Foxx.

Mrs. Foxx’s impropriety: The thought crime of arguing against “hate crime” laws by pointing out that Matthew Shepard – the tragic icon attached to the legislation – represents a salient argument against enacting them.

Mr. Shepard, the gay Wyoming teenager robbed and savagely beaten to death by drug-addled thugs in 1998, is the emotionally charged posthumous force behind the movement to pass hate crime laws. He got that way after a relentless, decade long mainstream media, Madison Avenue and Hollywood propaganda campaign to make his death a symbol of just-beneath-the-surface sadistic intolerance toward homosexuals. (more…)