On Teabagging and Other Oral Servitudes

This past April 15, as a half-million Tea Partiers hit the streets of America to protest the insane tax-and-spend policies of the Obama administration, a new epithet entered the American lexicon, and it was a beauty: “teabagger.” It was both an epithet and a double entendre you just couldn’t top, given the tea bag’s symbolism of the old Boston Tea Party and the anti-tax movement of today. In one fell swoop, a passionate movement was reduced to a perversion of passion: the dunking of one person’s scrotum into another person’s mouth. They got us. Big Time. And it’s everywhere now. Can’t get away from it. Even ABC’s George Stephanopoulos is using it now.

Credit where credit is due, and let’s face it. We Americans, right, left or center, take a churlish pride in a good slam dunk epithet. Not the hardcore racial third rail stuff, mind you. Just the playful sort. You know. Moonbat. Libtard. Tinfoil hat. In fact, tinfoil hat kind of backfired on Righties. Originally used to denigrate Lefties who adhered to psychotic conspiracy theories like 9/11 Truth, the term was embraced in full by the far Left as demonstrated by Markos Moulitsas’ Tinfoil Hat KOS conventions, smashing successes which attracted major left-leaning LibDem politicians over the past few years. (more…)

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Tags: "teabagging", amnesty, Arlen Specter, Chris Matthews, conservative
Posted Oct 29th 2009 at 6:51 am in Politics | 251926149 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jtsimpson/2009/10/29/on-teabagging-and-other-oral-servitudes/On+Teabagging+and+Other+Oral+Servitudes2009-10-29+13%3A51%3A14John+T.+Simpson

Unnatural Selection

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Tags: gop, NRCC, Republican Party, RINO, rino's
Posted Oct 18th 2009 at 12:18 pm in Political Humor | 24882632 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/cmuir/2009/10/18/unnatural-selection/Unnatural+Selection2009-10-18+19%3A18%3A53Chris+Muir

The Cult of Iconography

You know, the one thing that I learned from this last election is that if you have a young, hip, likable, historic candidate, and you promote him through CBS, ABC, NBC, CNN, MSNBC and all the rest, not to mention stand-up and late night comedy, the entire music industry, university, high school and even elementary school teachers, just about every major movie and television star… and run against the oldest candidate in the history of the Republic, despised by the base of his own party, a man unwilling to take the fight to the only fields in which he can win, and representing the incumbent party responsible for two unpopular wars, a two-term President with historic disapproval ratings, in the middle of the “worst economy since the Depression…”

[click image to play]

…Well, you put all of those forces in harness and you, sir, will attain 53% of the vote!

Just think about that for a second. Think about how many things have to go perfectly for Liberals to eke out a bare majority.

This leads me to think that their entire edifice doesn’t need a whole lot of demolition to swing the tide. One or two planks ought to do nicely and then the rest of it will collapse under its own weight.  (more…)

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Tags: abc, cbs, CNN, gop, Iconography
Posted Aug 20th 2009 at 5:05 am in Culture, Featured Story, Politics | 20782682 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/bwhittle/2009/08/20/the-cult-of-iconography/The+Cult+of+Iconography2009-08-20+12%3A05%3A16Bill+Whittle

My Secret Life as a Conservative Republican

I’m tired of hiding it. Everybody knows anyway. So it’s time to come clean, just like the Klan hoods I’ve got spinning in the dryer as we speak. It’s time for the Neanderthal knuckle-dragging, open mouth-breathing, racist, sexist, Klan and Timothy McVeigh-loving Montana militia member gun nut conservative Republican religious zealot in me to be set free. Repression is a bitch, and so am I.

I go to bed full of hate and wake up the same.  I hate blacks, Hispanics, gays, women, abortion doctors, liberals, Lefties, Democrats, you name ‘em, I hate ‘em if they’re not like me. I especially hate President Obama for being black. Just ask Janeane Garofalo, although being a Stalinist Socialist doesn’t help Obama’s cause any with me. Fact is, Obama could be a GOP Michael Steele Uncle Tom, and I’d still hate him even more than liberals hate Steele. Skin color trumps all. Thank God I was born the right color, or I’d probably kill myself. Wait, the hoods are dry! Be right back. (more…)

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Tags: "teabagging", 9/11, abortion, Adolf Hitler, AIPAC
Posted Jul 15th 2009 at 2:36 pm in Politics | 182706188 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jtsimpson/2009/07/15/my-secret-life-as-a-conservative-republican/My+Secret+Life+as+a+Conservative+Republican2009-07-15+21%3A36%3A48John+T.+Simpson

Wanted: A Vaccine for Liberalism

Whenever I have suggested that left-wingers aren’t normal human beings, and have wondered if perhaps they’re some weird interplanetary life form like the pods in “Invasion of the Body Snatchers,” the liberals accuse me of indulging in ad hominem attacks, and I suppose I am.  But I am honestly bewildered.  It just doesn’t seem plausible that Americans could find good things to say about tyrants like Castro, Chavez and Ahmadinejad, while at the same time reviling the likes of Dick Cheney, Rush Limbaugh and General Petraeus.

Left-wingers side with the so-called Palestinians and insist that their country was stolen from them by the Jews, but when you ask them just exactly where the country was located, what their flag looked like and who their president was, they huff and they puff and they denounce you as a tool of the Jewish lobby. (more…)

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Tags: Ahmadinejad, Barbara Boxer, Castro, chavez, CIA
Posted May 21st 2009 at 9:42 am in Politics | 137590One Commenthttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/bprelutsky/2009/05/21/wanted-a-vaccine-for-liberalism/Wanted%3A+A+Vaccine+for+Liberalism2009-05-21+16%3A42%3A45Burt+Prelutsky

Resuscitating the GOP 2: The Brand

“And if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand.” — Mark 3:25

It is both reasonable and fair to ask reformers of the Republican Party – those suggesting that we jettison the right wing and seek the gooey center of American politics — exactly how many of their convictions they are willing to compromise in pursuit of electoral success. It is also fair and reasonable to ask whether the people can truly admire or trust any public servant that is willing to sacrifice their convictions upon the altar of political power.

Party reformers are quick to point to the Democratic Party model that has proved successful, to whit: silencing the far left of their party and supporting centrist or blue dog candidates. Or so they say. The list of pro-life, pro-family, pro-second amendment, Global warming skeptic democrats in party leadership positions is very short indeed. (more…)

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Tags: 2010, 2012, bush, gop, GOP the Brand
Posted May 18th 2009 at 11:44 am in Politics | 137706One Commenthttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jphillips/2009/05/18/resuscitating-the-gop-2-the-brand/Resuscitating+the+GOP+2%3A+The+Brand2009-05-18+18%3A44%3A14Joseph+C.+Phillips

‘NewsBusted’ 5/15/09 — Fake News from the Right

In this episode, “NewsBusted” covers: Obama’s Egypt speech, Massachussetts welfare, conservatives, Republicans, GOP, Michelle Obama, Sesame Street, Barbara Walters, Anderson Cooper, Rosie O’Donnell, Kelly McGillis, and Simon Cowell.

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Tags: Anderson Cooper, Barack Obama, Barbara Walters, Conservatives, gop
Posted May 15th 2009 at 5:54 pm in Celebrity News, Media Criticism, Political Humor | 135654No Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/newsbusters/2009/05/15/%e2%80%98newsbusted%e2%80%99-51509-%e2%80%94-fake-news-from-the-right/%E2%80%98NewsBusted%E2%80%99+5%2F15%2F09+%E2%80%94+Fake+News+from+the+Right+2009-05-16+00%3A54%3A13NewsBusters

Conservative Marketing: Part Deux

In honor of Hollywood’s current trend, I offer you not a new blog entry but instead a sequel to my last post.  My little entry had some legs and even garnered a response on the extremist and out of touch web site the Huffington Post.  That author, some washed up corporate record executive who clings to the notion that he is “cool” and “hip,” actually called me a “sociopath winger.” Imagine that, rather than debate the merits of my ideas, he called me a name.  Based on my resume and personal history, I can only assume that his reference was to my unabashed fandom of the rock band Winger and its leader, hair band maestro, Kip Winger.

I read through all of the comments on this site and on others that linked to the article, and rather than jump in, I thought I would address some of the consistent themes here.

To clarify, the overall idea is that Conservatism needs to be packaged and sold on an overriding concept:  freedom and personal liberty.  The secondary attribute of this concept is the natural extension that government should be small, unobtrusive, and focused on state leadership opposed to the consolidation of federal power.  (more…)

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Tags: conservative marketing, gop, hollywood, Obama, Republican Party
Posted May 13th 2009 at 6:37 am in Entertainment, Politics | 1331545 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/lscott/2009/05/13/conservative-marketing-part-deux/Conservative+Marketing%3A+Part+Deux2009-05-13+13%3A37%3A40Leigh+Scott

Resuscitating the GOP

A popular topic of conversation these days is what ails the Republican Party. Everyone from barbershop pundits and opinion writers to former Bush administration officials have waded in with opinions and cures.

More than a few have proffered that the problem with the Republican Party is that it has moved too far from the political center and given too much sway to the fringe right. They hold that in order to survive and become vibrant again the Grand Old Party must jettison (or at least silence) the far right and must begin appealing to the moderate wing of the party. In other words the party must become even more like Democrats. I suspect this brilliant advice was dreamed up by Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid while doing shots of Tequila in some smart bar in Georgetown. They never dreamed Republicans would be so daft as to actually consider it.

Giving voice to a version of this madness, former Secretary of State Colin Powell, spoke to a group of corporate security executives and warned that the ills of the party could be traced to the repeating of the far right mantra. Powell went on to say, “Americans do want to pay taxes for services,” he continued, “Americans are looking for more government in their life, not less.” (more…)

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Tags: 2010, 2012, Colin Powell, gop, Harry Reid
Posted May 11th 2009 at 1:52 pm in Featured Story, Politics | 132362One Commenthttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jphillips/2009/05/11/resuscitating-the-gop/Resuscitating+the+GOP2009-05-11+20%3A52%3A23Joseph+C.+Phillips

A Republican Platform For The 21st Century

I have been a proud conservative Republican my entire life. My father and Jimmy Carter saw to that. My first vote ever was for Ronald Reagan in 1980, and I have never voted for a Democrat. Ever. Even today, the reasons for my being so have not changed, despite the media’s and liberal Democrats’ tireless efforts to discredit my belief system. Though the times may change, core principles never do. I have also served this nation proudly in uniform for six years, and don’t regret a minute of it.

In the early 1980s, my military service brought me to some of the darker corners of the world. I spent time in South Korea and Marcos’ Philippines when both countries were under martial law. Knowing I could be shot just for being in the wrong place at the wrong time really woke me up to what exactly it is we have here in America. Seeing a thousand Vietnamese Boat People pulled out of the South China Sea in one day only reinforced my belief in America, Sweet Land of Liberty.

Today, the Party of Lincoln and Reagan appears to be in political disarray, which is why I am writing this OpEd now. Yet many promising developments, along with some huge mistakes by Congress and the Obama Administration, have opened many new doors for us. If only we will enter. (more…)

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Tags: abortion, Africa, Al Franken, amnesty, apology tour
Posted May 2nd 2009 at 3:13 pm in Featured Story, Politics | 12196215 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jtsimpson/2009/05/02/a-republican-platform-for-the-21st-century/A+Republican+Platform+For+The+21st+Century2009-05-02+22%3A13%3A08John+T.+Simpson

What if President Obama Were a Republican?

In my Big Hollywood post of April 27th, I decried the media’s acting as a cheerleading fourth branch of government, in which the MSM has not only assumed a Dear Leader-like reverence and awe for our new president, but attacks any and all critics with slander, ridicule, and even intimidation, and discounts any real concerns by the public as right wing extremist rabble-rousing and racism.

Given my love of true reporting and Woodward and Bernstein-like investigative journalism, which is really nowhere to be found in this Messianic Media Age of Obama, it was a very depressing piece to write. But after the recent flyover of New York City by Air Force One and F-16 fighter jets, which sent half of the Big Apple fleeing for their lives, it occurred to me.

How would the Left report the news if Obama were a Republican, i.e. an Uncle Tom, as many on the Left call now-GOP Chairman Michael Steele? Eureka! That’s it! See, it’s one thing for me to point out the obvious, as I did in my media slam yesterday. But what if we walked GOP President Obama’s media coverage through the mirror darkly, as was SOP for President Bush?

NOW we’re gonna have some fun! (more…)

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Tags: abc, Air America, Al Franken, assassination, bush
Posted Apr 29th 2009 at 4:07 pm in Celebrity News, Politics | 11890614 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/jtsimpson/2009/04/29/what-if-president-obama-were-a-republican/What+if+President+Obama+Were+a+Republican%3F2009-04-29+23%3A07%3A47John+T.+Simpson

No Magic Internet Button for GOP

This week’s Washington Times column:

After the 2004 election, much was made of Joe Trippi, Howard Dean’s campaign manager and Internet guru. Mr. Trippi is credited with using social networking tools to hook up supporters and to drum up excitement and campaign cash for Vermont’s then-little-known former governor.

His book “The Revolution Will Not Be Televised: Democracy, the Internet, and the Overthrow of Everything” capitalized on Mr. Dean’s meteoric yet short-term rise at the hands of a previously competent yet little-known Democrat apparatchik who became an Internet legend for almost getting the dark horse over the primary finish line.

(more…)

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Tags: gop, Howard Dean, internet
Posted Jan 18th 2009 at 5:38 pm in News, Politics | 23845102 Commentshttp://bighollywood.breitbart.com/abreitbart/2009/01/18/no-magic-internet-button-for-gop/No+Magic+Internet+Button+for+GOP2009-01-19+01%3A38%3A46Andrew+Breitbart