Question: What do you get when you cross an American icon such as Academy-award-winning director and former kid actor Ron Howard with the continent of Europe – and shake with double doses of celebrity idiocy?

Answer: A baguette-eating Celebutard.

Oh, Opie! From Mayberry to Hollywood. How did you stray?

Back when he went by the name Ronny Howard, the star gained fame and adoration by playing the ultimate American rural tyke, Opie Taylor. He was a kid so obnoxiously clean, he’d agree to go to bed without supper before he’d ever denigrate his country. (more…)

Jackie Kennedy did it graciously.

Hillary Clinton did it grudgingly.

First Ladies have reinvented themselves into softer, gentler, more user-friendly versions of their former ornery selves since the dawn of TV. But none has done it so radically and dramatically – and quickly – as Michelle Obama, relaxing the arches of her disturbingly angry eyebrows, covering her naked upper arms, and putting a figurative muzzle across her disapproving lips. She has emerged, butterfly-like, as vacuous and silly as any chick you’d meet in a shopping mall. And she’s performed this metamorphosis with the expert encouragement of your friendly neighborhood celebutard, Oprah Winfrey. (more…)

After winning the Oscar for Shakespeare in Love, Gwyneth Paltrow has been shamefully idle (Shallow Hal, anyone?) Even her latest film, Two Lovers, co-starring Joaquin Phoenix, premiered, depressingly unnoticed, at the Sunshine Cinema on New York’s Lower East Side.

But Gwyneth, who moved to London after declaring, “We’re all going to die when George Bush has his way,’’ is far from allergic to taking home our money. Nor is the lady bred in an exclusive Manhattan private school opposed to reinventing herself in a curiously American kind of career:  lifestyle guru.

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Can a country get so caught up in lunatic political correctness that it ceases to respect human values and dignity? Can an entire land drink the Kool-Aid of enforced Islamofascism, to the point where every man, woman and child within its borders earns the cursed title “Celebutard?”

How about a continent? (more…)

He’s the gift who just keeps on giving.

This week’s featured Celebutard already figures like an incurable disease in my new book, “Celebutards: The Hollywood Hacks, Limousine Liberals and Pandering Politicians Who Are Destroying America” (Kensington). He is Sean Penn – the A-list actor who brazenly broke bread with America-hating Hugo Chavez of Venezuela. He also traveled to Iran where he heard 10,000 people shouting in unison, “Death to America’’ and “Death to Israel’’ – and decided they didn’t really mean it. Let’s give ‘em all a hug. (more…)

FOREWORD: WHAT IS A CELEBUTARD?

ce – leb – u – tard (suh – LEB – yu – tard) noun:

1. A famous person with a grandiose notion of his own importance and contribution to the known universe.
2. A human being of sub-par intellect, oversized ego and colossal bank account, whose existence represents a drag on the food chain, waste of oxygen and severe annoyance.
3. An egregious moron. (Origin: from the Latin celebutardus Paris Hiltonus maximum Baldwinus

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