There’s a lot to like about “The Rebound,” available on DVD and Blu- ray tomorrow, but it ends up too much like typical rom-com fare than it needs to be. Director Bart Freundlich (who has directed some great episodes of Showtime’s “Californication”) talks about how he was inspired by the New York set films about relationships by Woody Allen in an interview on the DVD, but “The Rebound” never lives up to that kind of potential. It’s tame when it needs to be excessive and excessive when it needs to be tame.

Sandy (Catherine Zeta-Jones) is living a typical suburban life with her two kids and husband when she stumbles across a tape of her husband cheating on her with a neighbor. After packing up the kids and heading to the city, she meets Aram (Justin Bartha), a young coffee shop employee living in the apartment beneath hers who agrees to start babysitting for her as she works late and goes on disappointing dates. As Aram becomes more and more responsible for the children, Sandy realizes she enjoys spending her late nights at home with the mature-beyond-his-years nanny than spending them with dates who have a bad habit of talking to her while they utilize a porter potty (Eh, it’s the city. Who can judge?).

Sandy and Aram begin seeing each other but have to face a world that scoffs at the idea of their 15-year age difference. Sandy’s friends see Aram as nothing but a rebound, and she becomes confused as to whether he is or isn’t. Thus, “The Rebound” presses forward trying desperately to be the next Woody Allen pic; the problem is there’s none of the subtlety or depth of Allen’s work.

“The Rebound” had great potential. Both Zeta-Jones and Bartha are talented actors and inhabit their characters well. The attraction between them is believable, but the film never delves into the relationship or that attraction enough for us to take it seriously when it wants to be taken seriously. The script should’ve taken us into Aram and Sandy’s relationship further and not been so tame as to why each wants the other. The films isn’t afraid to show a party they attend with excessive drinking and some drug use, but it’s afraid to delve into the mental complexes which must be drawing them to one another.

The character of Sandy is also pretty underdeveloped. Her love of sports is never really fully understood or realized by the script. It never becomes anything more than a quirk. And her ex-husband has about one scene that is ruined by horrible dialogue and unrealistic actions. “The Rebound” seems to want to get down and dirty when it comes to relationships and New York City, but the relationship between Sandy and Aram is treated so tamely, like a lesser romantic comedy with lower sights would’ve treated it, and the only time New York City is given much of a thought is when the film feels like it’s ready for a gag (usually literally). Freundlich does photograph the city quite well, but we know from his work on “Californication” that he is capable of much more.

“The Rebound” also loses what little footing it had towards the end when it throws a too-long montage towards us and tries way to hard to dig into the “meaning of it all.”

The only special features included are a series of interviews with everyone from Freundlich (who gives some great bits about the making of and the inspiration for the film) to the kids in the movie.

Overall, “The Rebound” is much better than most romantic comedies that get released these days, which is why it’s a bit of a surprise that it skipped theaters entirely (though that is not the same curse it was years ago). But ultimately, it can’t live up to its high goals. Zeta-Jones and Bartha are both great actors (as are the supporting cast) and Freundlich is one of the most underrated directors working today, but the film can’t overcome its fear of being exactly what I’m sure it originally set out to be: an intelligent and very funny take on how the right person will always show up even if we are not ready for them (especially then) and that the end of some things only mean the beginning of many others.

“The Rebound” is worth renting or streaming if you and your spouse (especially if he/she is fifteen years younger) are looking for a cutesy tale to pass the night that isn’t entirely trash, but hopefully everyone involved will give us something better in the years to come.

Sucker Punches: None.

“House of Lies,” debuting at 10 p.m. EST, follows a team of management consultants led by lethal-in-a-board-room Marty (Don Cheadle). The supporting characters, however, simply fill out stereotypes. The two other men on Marty’s team exist for little more than to give some cheap, sitcom like laughs, and Kristen Bell exists as a foil for Marty. There’s supposed to be a sexual tension or, at least, tension between the two, but the script never sells the chemistry and neither do the two actors (mainly Bell, who still looks like she belongs in high school).

The show begins by thrusting us into the hectic mess that is Marty’s life. We are introduced to his ex-wife, whose management consultant team is number one (Marty’s is number two). We are introduced to Marty’s shrink father, his son who’s going through a very strange gender crisis, and Marty’s clients. Once we enter the business world Marty inhabits, the writing gets wooden and the politics go left… way left.

Marty’s team points out no more than three or four times how evil the people they work for are. They mention again and again that these people are responsible for the financial crisis and for people living on the street. The dialogue feels ripped right out of a Huffington Post piece and feels very disjointed and out of place. Right after these sucker punches, the characters go back to inhabiting their slimy evil selves. This is the other point the show wants us to understand: these characters are bad or, at least, doing bad things. Because Marty exploits the financial crisis towards the end of the show and states that he doesn’t care about the mortgage crisis, we are supposed to understand that he is selfish and needs to wake up. But these points feel way too heavily pushed and not entirely fleshed out in the script by Matthew Carnahan.

The show gives no mention or thought to the government ripping off the American taxpayer. It simply goes in with the preconceived notion that these men who own these companies are solely responsible and people like Marty only encourage them, but Cheadle plays Marty so we are supposed to hope that he wakes up pretty soon. Politics aside, the show is still pretty typical stuff and disjointed in many parts.

The pilot to “House of Lies” provides us with exactly what we have come to expect from Showtime: nudity, endless sex between strangers and enough cursing to make your Grandma Jones wish it was Sunday already so we could all repent. And there’s nothing wrong with any of this as long as it is organic to the show, but in “House of Lies” you sense that the producers are having a grand old time throwing in strip clubs, lesbian sex scenes and the like just because they’re on Showtime. Actually, when I go back and read that out loud it doesn’t sound too bad. Chalk up a point for this show!

The first episode also doesn’t give us much reason to want to follow these characters. A pilot is supposed to tell you just enough to reel you in and make you desperate to know what will happen to the main character. Showtime’s “Californication” has what could be considered a perfect pilot and it feels almost opposite to “House of Lies.” In that show, we were given laughs and we cared for Hank Moody (David Duchovny), while also despising him. When that final pensive moment came (they always do, even in this show) we desperately wanted to know more. “House of Lies” doesn’t leave us with that sensation.

“House of Lies” is not without merit. Cheadle does what he can with the character and makes some moments rather charming (especially ones where he breaks the fourth wall and talks directly to the audience) and the pilot is shot incredibly well. But, there’s no surprise there. Stephen Hopkins has proven himself as an efficient television director before (he directed the previously mentioned and brilliant “Californication” pilot). Besides that, there’s not much here to justify a long-running series. The show could get better, and one hopes it does because of the talent involved, but based on the pilot alone the show is an ambitious effort that lets partisan politics and a disjointed narrative and all too typical moments get in the way of it being great.

Then, when on my Stairmaster one day listening to the song, I heard a phrase that could have been written by the Capitalist philosopher, Joseph Schumpeter. I replayed the song and then also picked up the same spiritual sense I got from the Robert’s novel. Now, when the endorphins get going in exercise, many strange thoughts come to mind. But I needed to take a closer look at the song.

Given my belief that the economic and political philosophy of the real California is responsible, not only for its own bankrupt and corrupt condition, but for a good percentage of America’s current condition, I wondered what RHCP lead singer and lyricist Anthony Kiedis saw about California back in 1999—right at the height of its power and wealth during the technology boom. Upon reading the lyrics, (really, listening to the song) one is brought into a dark world. The escape hatch is hard to see, but it is there. While its diagnosis is damning, it also provides a spiritual message of hope. And yes, it can relate to everyday decisions about many things, including even politics. Thus, I decided the best way to work it into a blog was simply to “interpret” it and see what happens. In doing so, I also get to have fun with it like the other, uh, geeks on SongMeanings.

The “portmanteau” word, Californication, could be replaced with “Californification” (or Californization). This would be the equivalent of saying “beautification” in discussing “beautifying” the world. But the coincidence of California’s spelling produces the delightful extra feature of putting the word “fornication” inside this blend word. In other words, the “Californification” of the world can equally be re-written as the “Californication” of the world. Pretty clever by Kiedis. “Californication,” for RHCP, represents the false “premise” and false “promise” offered by a decadent and amoral culture. It is not just California, but it definitely is also California.

Interpretation of poetry or song lyrics is of necessity subjective. Great lyrics have such a clean structure, they permit great interpretive latitude. Not that “anything goes,” because it doesn’t. However, a well structured and dense “metaphorical” lyric provides room for the reader/listener to fill in some of their own content. While I do not know what Anthony Kiedis exactly had in mind, I believe my “interpretation” is consistent with the song’s prose and structure. So here goes my full exposition.

First, here’s a link to a recording of the song with lyrics embedded in the YouTube video:

–

The following are the lyrics in full.

Psychic spies from China
Try to steal your mind’s elation
Little girls from Sweden
Dream of silver screen quotations
And if you want these kind of dreams
It’s Californication

It’s the edge of the world
And all of western civilization
The sun may rise in the East
At least it settles in the final location
It’s understood that Hollywood
sells Californication

Pay your surgeon very well
To break the spell of aging
Celebrity skin is this your chin
Or is that war your waging

[Chorus]:

First born unicorn
Hard core soft porn
Dream of Californication
Dream of Californication

Marry me girl be my fairy to the world
Be my very own constellation
A teenage bride with a baby inside
Getting high on information
And buy me a star on the boulevard
It’s Californication

Space may be the final frontier
But it’s made in a Hollywood basement
Cobain can you hear the spheres
Singing songs off station to station
And Alderon’s not far away
It’s Californication

Born and raised by those who praise
Control of population everybody’s been there
and
I don’t mean on vacation

[Chorus]:

Destruction leads to a very rough road
But it also breeds creation
And earthquakes are to a girl’s guitar
They’re just another good vibration
And tidal waves couldn’t save the world
From Californication

Pay your surgeon very well
To break the spell of aging
Sicker than the rest
There is no test
But this is what you’re craving  

I will approach this interpretation by verse by verse initially, then conclude with a summary.

Psychic spies from China
Try to steal your mind’s elation
Little girls from Sweden
Dream of silver screen quotations
And if you want these kind of dreams
It’s Californication

We are introduced to our Californication world without too much fanfare. One can imagine walking down the streets of any big city and seeing the various tarot card readers, “Eastern” mystics, and fortune tellers. These “psychic spies” prey on the naive who willingly give up their freedom, for cash of course, to find out their fake destiny. There is also the classic fantasy going back 90 years of heading for Hollywood to become a “big star.” But these “little girls” from Sweden (or Detroit, Des Moines, New York) will likely get a dose of Californication for their trouble instead.

It’s the edge of the world
And all of western civilization
The sun may rise in the East
At least it settles in the final location
It’s understood that Hollywood
sells Californication

Dual meanings here as Kiedis starts increasing his complexity. The literal meaning is simple. The “West” is generally considered to be Europe and North America (although to be accurate it culturally includes New Zealand and Australia). The (almost) most western part of “Western Civilization” is California. The “East” is Asia. In our world of time, the first morning sunlight happens just west of the international date line in the Pacific Ocean. More metaphorically, however, it is understood that Civilization began in China 5000 years ago. He now introduces his first hint—more to come– that Civilization’s final location “in time” may occur in “California.” The “edge” of the world is also the edge of time, not just a physical location.

Pay your surgeon very well
To break the spell of aging
Celebrity skin is this your chin
Or is that war your waging [Chorus:]
First born unicorn
Hard core soft porn
Dream of Californication
Dream of Californication

He now begins to personalize and it is clear that the initial tone of sadness has now changed to mockery. He taunts the purveyors of Californication as desperate beings try to deny time in a vain and futile attempt for immortality (“Celebrity Skin” was a Grammy-winning hit on the same topic of plastic surgery released in 1998 by Courtney Love’s group, Hole. Her late husband Kurt Cobain is referenced later in the song). The “chorus” is, I think, pretty clear. The “unicorn” is an ancient fictional beast and appears throughout literary history. The one that seems to fit here is as a symbol of purity. The unicorn was often represented as being tameable only by a virgin maiden. In Catholic mythology, from late Antiquity (300-600 AD), it represented Christ being incarnated. It was depicted in art having its head on the Virgin Mary’s lap. Later, in a non-religious framework, it represented chaste love and faithful marriage. So we are born to have love in a relationship, monogamous love—but our culture drives us to Californication’s “hard core/soft porn.”

Marry me girl be my fairy to the world
Be my very own constellation
A teenage bride with a baby inside
Getting high on information
And buy me a star on the boulevard
It’s Californication 

This verse, which at first does reveal an island of hope in a world of despair, also describes the fatal attraction of Californication. It is impossible to know whether this verse is really “first person” or just a representation of two people. I chose the latter. He depicts a presumably young couple. The man/boy promises devotion as his teenage bride discovers all she can about pregnancy, “getting high on the information”. But Kiedis describes the groom getting distracted and will do anything—what could be more despairing than “buying” recognition?— to get his “star on the boulevard”. That’s Californication.

Space may be the final frontier
But it’s made in a Hollywood basement
Cobain can you hear the spheres
Singing songs off station to station
And Alderon’s not far away
It’s Californication

This verse’s overall meaning is clear, although the specifics have multiple interpretations (maybe by design) and have too many “degrees of separation” to go into all the details. The overall meaning is that Californication threatens the existence (spiritually, if not physically) of our civilization. The first two lines refer to the media’s ability to create illusions and distort reality. Cobain is Kurt Cobain, Kiedis’ friend. “Spheres singing songs off Station to Station” is difficult to get precise. David Bowie had a hit album in 1976 called “Station to Station.”Nirvana (and their spin-off band “Foo Fighters” after Cobain’s death) often appeared together with Bowie. Nirvana covered a Bowie song The Man Who Sold The World. But that song was not on the Station to Station album, but an earlier album. Who and what are the “spheres”? Pythagoras was the first to link music, math and the universe into a “mystical” image called the “music of the spheres”. This is the most plausible meaning as the next line, “Alderon’s not far away” clearly refers to the home planet of “Princess Leia” in Star Wars which was destroyed by a “Death Star”—(its “Californication”).

In World War II, Allied pilots would often see strange fiery sphere like objects in the sky which they could not shoot down. This happened throughout 1944. This, by the way, is a phenomenon that has never been explained. Pilots and their command originally thought these were new German weapons so they called them “kraut-fireballs”. When they realized the UFOs were unlikely to be of German origin they were then called “foo-fighters.” So are “the spheres” the Foo Fighters? Maybe, but they never sang songs “from Station to Station.” In any event, the main character in “The Man Who Sold The World” is a timeless demonic figure “who sold the world”. The main character in the song “Station to Station” is the “Thin White Duke”, a character who “makes “white” stain”. These “characters” were dark, mysterious and seemingly demonic—of the Californication world.

So where do we stand? The lyricist seems to be missing his deceased friend. Cobain is likely one who shared his vision of the world, as did, presumably, Bowie. But the bottom line of this verse is “Alderon’s not far away” i.e., the “destruction” of the earth. (The original sheet music apparently uses the spelling “Alderon.” But the planet in Star Wars is spelled “Alderaan”).

Born and raised by those who praise
Control of population everybody’s been there
and I don’t mean on vacation

Kiedis is unambiguously criticizing our culture’s obsession with  birth control and/or abortion. It could also mean a critique of those in power. But “those who praise” are all of us to some extent. “Those who praise” are also the the purveyors of the values of Californication. We have all been to “California” and “I don’t mean on vacation.” We cannot just point fingers at others but we need to look in the mirror.

Destruction leads to a very rough road
But it also breeds creation
And earthquakes are to a girl’s guitar
They’re just another good vibration
And tidal waves couldn’t save the world
From Californication 

This verse lead me to this insane attempt to “interpret” this song. The first two lines make the point made by many philosophers and artists, but made most famous by Joseph Schumpeter’s phrase “creative destruction”. The term, in economics, means progress happens through the destruction of old industries/businesses/technologies to make way for better use of man’s creative talents. (There are no more buggy whip makers, as they say). What is the author getting at? The second two lines are a representation in specifics what is meant by the first two lines. It also is an image of “infinity,” “perspective,” and “relativity.” The “single fact” of a plucked guitar string (or any “fact” or “set of observations” of life) should be viewed from many different angles. At the level of the infinitesmally small, in this case, the vibration of the guitar, we have catastrophe. At the level of the Universe (“music of the spheres”) it is just another “good vibration”–ha. This is not related at all to the concept that all values are “relative.” Quite the opposite. Its just that “things” are more complex than they may at first appear. One constantly is required to step back and view life from different “relative” angles to see the full truth. These first four lines are timeless and represent one of the two strands of “hope” in the song.

The last two lines of the verse are a biblical reminder and warning. Even Noah’s Flood (which cleansed the world to start anew), or “tidal waves” cannot save the world from Californication. Now that is harsh.

Pay your surgeon very well
To break the spell of aging
Sicker than the rest
There is no test
But this is what you’re craving 

We close out with a final sarcastic burst. You better pay up a lot to stop time (already known to be impossible). He seems to be goading the “Californicators” to just do it, “this is what you’re craving.” But why, he asks, “There is no test” and you cannot break the “spell of aging.”

Lets put it all together. We know this “Californication” thing is “bad” but what is it? Californication is libertinism, crass materialism, solipsistic interactions and spiritual emptiness. It is our modern secular world, in short. Who knew RHCP shared something in common with cultural conservatives? What is the “better way”? The “unicorn” and “teenage girl with the baby inside” point the way. This is the first strand of the message. It is natural and beautiful to have a loving monogamous relationship between a man and a woman. Not exactly new “news” but in a Californication world it almost seems radical. The second strand of the message, the “earthquake in the girl’s guitar”, provides clues on how we should view the world. It is mysterious and beautiful and we have lost sight of the “wonder” that is really omnipresent. The song is trying to reintroduce a sense of wonder, awe, humility, “simple” complexity and mystery into our world. It is all around us—-but we do not see it at all. We may as well be Alderaan. It’s Californication.