The oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico is drawing a lot of attention from Americans right now, particularly the residents of the Gulf Coast who will have to absorb the brunt of the spill’s economic and ecological impact. Consequently, every cable news outlet in the country is hosting guest after guest to talk about the spill and how its ramifications might be curtailed.

Earlier this week, CNN’s Anderson Cooper, host of Anderson Cooper 360, had actor Robert Redford on his show to talk about the spill. Not surprisingly, what viewers heard from Redford was how the spill demonstrated that big oil companies are bad, that it was George W. Bush’s fault (more accurately, Dick Cheney’s), and that Obama has done his level best to handle this mess in a Presidential manner.

Cooper began the interview by asking Redford what he thought of BP’s response to the spill thus far, and Redford answered by saying we were seeing the fruits of “a failed energy policy” that was “the consequence of the collusion between government, Congress and big oil companies.” Redford went on to say that it was our “terrible energy policy” had “allowed this [spill] to happen” in the first place. (more…)

FROM: POTUS

TO:  All White House Staff,  Ms. O.W., Rev. W., Mr. W.A. 

CC: MSNBC, NBC, CNBC, CBS, ABC, CNN, NPR, COMEDY CENTRAL.

RULE #1: 

Beginning this Friday, we are eliminating all references to, either verbally or physically; the notion of ‘problems’ of any sort.

No admittance of, or complaint about, a ‘problem’ whether previous or present shall be verbalized, text-ed, emailed, noted, teleprompted, signed, mimed, smoke signaled, transferred, dreamt about, slept with, interpretively danced, pig called, semaphored, channeled, Morse coded or telepathed in any language known now or that may be discovered or created by men, aliens or Canadians in perpetuity forever and ever, amen. (more…)