Mr. President, Please Don’t Bogart the Blunt
by Leigh ScottAfter a long day at work on a commercial shoot, I decided to unwind with a little internet and cable television. Politics and punditry are my hobby, not my main source of income, so I indulge in a little cable news and internet sites as time permits. I’ve always felt it important to see the world outside the “echo chamber” of like-minded folks, so my television sits for far too many hours on MSNBC and the Huffington Post is bookmarked on my browser.
What struck me from a few hours of watching leftist television and reading leftist gobbledygook is how far detached from reality these people are. It’s not a simple case of them having a few points wrong, or looking at things from a bizarrely biased perspective; they truly make statements and cling to ideas that have no basis in reality. As conservatives struggle to find apt metaphors to explain their opponent’s mindsets and delusions, I think I may have figured it out.
The left in our country is high. Completely stoned out of their minds.
Living and working in L.A., one encounters more stoners on the average day than they do illegal immigrants. I’ve worked with stoners. I’ve dated stoners. I’ve lived with stoners. I know stoners inside and out and I can tell you, without a doubt, that the Democrat Party is completely crunked.
Stoners always think that they are smarter than they really are. Copious amounts of THC trick the brain into thinking that the most banal thought is somehow a stroke of genius. Just watch a bunch of stoners debate philosophy and metaphysics. The most ridiculous comments take on the gravitas of a Stephen Hawking thesis. Morons think that they are Michio Kaku after a towering bong hit.
Stoners live for the moment. They are all about feelings, not facts. They possess a detached sense of cause and effect. I recall one specific episode when I came home and tore into my stoner roommate for not having his share of the rent. His solution to his lack of rent was simple. See, the real problem wasn’t his lack of money, but my reaction to it. I was far too stressed about the situation. What we should do, to solve the rent problem, was grab a couple of drinks at the Cafe Formosa on Santa Monica and then head over to Crazy Girls, a local gentleman’s club. After that excursion, I would calm down and stop harshing his gig over the unpaid rent.
Six Coronas and two lap dances later, I wasn’t as furious. We both felt better. To the stoner, everything was fixed. Problem solved! Unfortunately, the rent was still unpaid. My loser roommate still didn’t have a job
Stoners never emerge from their stupor. Part of being a true “wake and bake” stoner is the ability to remain faded. True stoners never snap out of it. I’ve dealt with coke heads and alcoholics, but stoners are a different breed. The alkie and the base head will go on their binge, then apologize profusely for their conduct; until, of course, the next time they go on a bender. The pot head always exists in a dream like world of cannabis induced euphoria. They do not see their drug addiction as a problem, but instead, as a heightened sense of being and awareness.
Lastly, stoners never have their own money. Remember those Chili’s leftovers you were planning on eating? How about those delicious Red Baron frozen pizzas? Chances are good that your stoner roommate ate your food while you were at work. Sure, they promise to “hook you up” as soon as they get a chance to go to Ralph’s, but it never happens. Stoners have a bizarre, communal logic that dictates that everything exists for the collective. Your pizza, your stash, your girlfriend all exist for the greater stoner good. To demand private ownership of anything is an offense to the “stoner code.”
With this in mind, how can one not see the recent doings in Washington as anything but massive cannabis abuse? Cash for clunkers? Stoner logic. Stimulus package? Stoner logic. Government run health care? Stoner logic. Cap and trade? Stoner logic.
I can picture Nancy Pelosi and Steny Hoyer lying on a bean bag, listening to Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon and watching The Little Mermaid, dreaming up domestic and foreign policy. ”You know who those town hall protesters remind me of? Nazis, man. They’re freakin Nazis.” (Cough. Cough. Giggle. Giggle). “What if we give money to people to buy new cars and we smash their old cars?” ”Dude, that’s totally awesome, because we just watched Dude, Where’s My Car?”
You’d be hard pressed to find any other rational explanation for a large group of people who discard decades of historical evidence, common sense, and basic moral decency other than massive amounts of reefer.
I think the whole Socialist, Communist, Nazi analogy is stretching it a bit. Michael Moore wishes he had the self discipline of a Joseph Goebbels. Nancy Pelosi wishes that she was as dynamic as a Heinrich Himmler. Barack Obama would love to have the focus of a Kim Jong Il, but man, it’s tough to stay on track when the Discovery Channel is running Shark Week and Doritos just unleashed that new buffalo wing sauce flavored tortilla chip. Have you guys tried those yet? They’re the bomb.
Conservatives are gearing up to do battle with an army of statist fascists, but we are really up against Cheech and Chong.
Obama is no Stalin, or even FDR. Face it, he’s Jeff Spicoli.
“It’s our time, Mr. Hand.” Hey, wasn’t that one of his campaign slogans?
Sadly for us, we live in a world where stoner nonsense is taken as gospel by the media and a large segment of the population. I think it’s fair to say that Obama captured the stoner vote in 2008, but few of us expected him to govern from inside a giant ganja cloud.
The best way to deal with stoners is to simply let them go about their business, but don’t trust them with anything important. Ever. My stoner roommate was a source of endless entertainment, but we were smart enough to never trust him to pay the cable bill. We need to get these Crunkensteins out of power as quickly as possible.
If we don’t, everything goes up in smoke.
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764 Comments
LOL…..LOL…..I love it, now the problem is they're still in control until next year.
"crunkensteins" hehe. dude, you are harshing their high.
LMFAO! "Don't trust them with anything." So true, deadbeats!
Leigh writes: " Conservatives are gearing up to do battle with an army of statist fascists, but we are really up against Cheech and Chong. ". OK…now that was funny. The whole piece was funny and I don't even know any stoners.
That crowd has always been around, the problem is that now there are more of them than there are of us, more people recieve government checks or the equalivant than not.
As a former stoner, I say:
Dude.
They can lay around and shoot bull all they want…now if we can just keep them high enough to actually not DO anything…
I was thinking crack, and considering their mania I'm sure some of them are on that, but your weed theory does explain a lot…
"Stoners always think that they are smarter than they really are. Copious amounts of THC trick the brain into thinking that the most banal thought is somehow a stroke of genius." "Stoners never emerge from their stupor. Part of being a true “wake and bake” stoner is the ability to remain faded. True stoners never snap out of it." "(S)toners never have their own money…Your pizza, your stash, your girlfriend all exist for the greater stoner good. To demand private ownership of anything is an offense to the “stoner code.”
NAILED IT. I know some chronic stoners very well, and you have their mentality pegged.
I bet BHO is smoking reefer in the White House.
No, you're completely wrong. That crowd is VASTLY outnumbered by non-drug-addled and rational people. I don't think there are more people getting federal benefits than not, but I can't lay hands on the stats right now to back that up. It's a gut calculation only.
Stoners need to vote on November 20th. DUDE!!
What a hilarious but semi-true article!! Funny, funny, funny. I don't think it's reefer, though, I think they all got a hold of a large quantity of blond Lebanese hash (with a touch of heroin in it) a few years ago. Their stash will eventually run out.
Great! Obama is Jeff Spicoli!
The Dem's pass cap and trade in the house and claim it will 'create jobs' and lower costs, because, you know wind ids free…
The Department of Energy has released a report, and wouldn't you know it… It raises costs, will further contract our economy and will destroy jobs…
http://motorcitytimes.com/mct/the-energy-departme...
The article is humorous, but it is tempered heavily with the reality that the 'stoners' are trying their absolute damnedest to force unworkable ideas on the rest of us simply for self-agrandizment and power.
We need to get them into rehab as quickly as possible for our sakes, not theirs.
"Men fight for liberty and win it with hard knocks. Their children, brought up easy, let it slip away again, poor fools. And their grandchildren are once more slaves." ~~D.H. Lawrence, Classical American Literature, 1922
That is what Glenn Beck said on Friday, they are intoxicated…
I think you paint with too broad a brush. There are plenty of stoners who are fully functional members of society without all the baggage you insist they carry. I know many people who smoke daily yet are 1) able to hold down good, high paying jobs; 2) very generous and never reliant on the charity of others; 3) conservative in their political beliefs.
So don't tarnish the image of stoners everywhere simply because of your own poor experiences. It's unfair, uncouth and unwarranted.
Interesting analogy. "Under the new plan, man, you know you can keep your insurance, dude" No, if it fails to conform to the insurance exchange guidelines. "No, dude, I said you can keep it." Not if the government disapproves of the coverage. "But no, man, I said you could, because you can and it is….let's get White Castle, I got a dollar, man. I'm soooooo hungry."
One thing wrong about the analogy. In the end, Mr. Hand visit Spicoli at home, and Jeff at least learns a little history, unlike this stoner.
Next time, maybe we can convince them to enlighten themselves on election day, spending the entire day on the couch, contemplating their navels.
What a laugh, and right on too!
Stoners have done a pretty good job tarnishing their own reputations, without Scott's help. I attended CU-Boulder, where they issue bongs with dorm room keys. I've known a few stoners in my day. Most were terribly nice people. They couldn't be trusted to do much beyond making sure the little jingly silver bells on their ankle bracelets were hanging straight, though.
If the people you know are THAT amazing and fabulous whilst maintaining a daily smoking habit, imagine what they could do with 100% full presence of mind. I guess it all comes down to what one needs to cope with all that success.
These a-holes give stoners a bad name.
There are, as H2U said, plenty of fully functioning stoners out there who take care of their business.
The jerks you're talking about are the kind of stoners who can't maintain.
Uuuuhhhh. WOW. Dude…
What was I going to say?
Dude, everyone knows this is a bogus article, Twinkies are the preferred munchies, man. You conservative squares are always going on about this work thing …man, just peace out and have a doobie …chill man, and when in doubt, “everybody must get stoned!”
A thousand page, Healthcare Bill unlikely stoners, my guess is Coke?
Great article. I grew up with plenty of stoners and lived in Isla Vista. I wouldn’t trust these people with my car let alone my healthcare, social security, national security or anything with greater consequence than running to Subway for a sandwich. Now they’ve been entrusted with running the nation. Half this country is mentally defective. The reason Obama got elected is because most democrats are on drugs; whether it be prozac, vicodin, oxycotin, cocaine, pot, etc. they’re high and delusional.
These leftwing dolts treated the election as an American Idol competition and their liberal guilt compelled them to vote the black guy not the qualified guy to show what tolerant imbeciles they are. Now we’re paying the price for these backward regressives foolishness.
[...] Read it. What struck me from a few hours of watching leftist television and reading leftist gobbledygook is how far detached from reality these people are. It’s not a simple case of them having a few points wrong, or looking at things from a bizarrely biased perspective; they truly make statements and cling to ideas that have no basis in reality. As conservatives struggle to find apt metaphors to explain their opponent’s mindsets and delusions, I think I may have figured it out. [...]
[...] any foreign power, Ahmedinejad has said they should be prosecuted for crimes against the state. Mr. President, Please Don’t Bogart the Blunt – bighollywood.breitbart.com 08/30/2009 After a long day at work on a commercial shoot, I decided [...]
Amusing but I'm sticking with the evil communists theory. Reading suggestions: "Witness" by Whittaker Chambers and "Blacklisted by History" by Stan Evans.
I don't know what these folks are on but it sure reminds me of a bad acid trip. Delusional, self absorbed, and having a hard time grasping reality.
In Rumsfeldian terms, stoners are more aware of the known unknowns.
This is the most bullshit piece of writing I've read in a LONG time, and that's pretty impressive considering how many articles I've read on this blog site.
You've managed to somehow squeeze ad hominem and straw man into the same conglomerated logical fallacy.
The credibility of this site as anything even approaching 'a blog site to be taken seriously' just plummeted.
Wht do you keep reading the blog?
Why do you keep reading the blog?
I just randomly found you on Breitbart. Now that I've been duly exposed to your exquisite logic, no one can blunt my desire to read more of your stuff. Write on, dude.
LOL! clever post. i have linked it to my blog.
[...] Scott at Big Hollywood has a new and original theory: The nation is being governed by people stoned out of their gourds: Stoners have a bizarre, [...]
stoner…
I've always thought this. Thanks for spreading the word in a very funny article.
Good stuff.
I don't know whether "energizing the stoner base" is actually an oxymoron or not, but an old axiom of politics is that the party who can summon the most righteous indignation and energize the base wins given the relative close split of the electorate. Last couple of elections, Republicans paid for not practicing what they preached. Hope and Change was particularly well suited to the stoner world view. Now, those positions are reversed, so I'm hoping the stoners sleep through 2010 and 2012 because the rest of us sure as hell won't.
Dude, I am starting to get enlightened now. I starting to understand what All Wee-Weed Up means. Thanks
lol to the red baron pizza. I miss those days.
As a libertarian who smoked a lot of weed when I was younger, doesn't especially regret it (my dumbest altered state moments came from alcohol), and still favors de-criminalizing marijuana (not hard drugs), I can say your characterization of pot-heads is spot-on.
Speaking from personal experience, I can tell you that pot does not make anyone smarter or more artistic; it makes you think eating a jar or Miracle Whip while watching a "Beavis and Butthead" marathon was a good use of a Thursday night. (True story.) I quit smoking weed because it makes you lazy and dumb–I never succumbed to liberal stoner political thought, though.
I still believe pot should be legalized and regulated much as alcohol is done now, subject to the wishes of the voters on a state-by-state basis. Yes, it makes people lazy and stupid, but being lazy and stupid does not harm anyone else, and if an adult wishes to be lazy and stupid it is their right. Save the law enforcement budget now used for busting pot-heads for prosecuting more serious crimes.
As for the stupid stoner liberal politics, vote 'em out–sensible people will see through them.
Generalising quite enough there?
"plenty of stoners who are fully functional"
That would be an impossibility to be fully functional and to be stoned by definition.
"plenty of stoners who are fully functional"
That would be an impossibility to be fully functional and to be stoned by definition.
Uncouth? Hardly. I grew up with three stoner brothers. Leigh's commentary seems entirely accurate to me. This comment seems to be the justification of a stoner who's feeling a bit martyred right now.
Tony Hawk treating the White House as a skate park pretty much seals the deal.
"Your pizza, your stash, your girlfriend all exist for the greater stoner good."
Classic! …and sadly too true.
As a reformed Leftist Loady, I must concur wholeheartedly with Mr. Scott. I know intimately of this 'stoner logic'. As a college student and a few years hence, I was S&S (stoned and stupid) pretty much daily. But I thought I was so smart…so aware…so brilliant…and of course so very cool. And it was all rubbish — culminating in my supporting Jimmy Carter for Prez.! (Ha! — I can't believe I just admitted to that!) My Damascus Road moment was in the form of Ronald Reagan radio broadcasts. It took three months of absorbing conservative philosophy before the haze of dope smoke lifted.
Leigh, you're right — Liberalism makes sense — if you're toasted.
"Faaaaarrrrrrr out, man!!"
This is exactly the type of Ideological Blather that we have had too much of. You just repeat and repeat and repeat the line that democrats are Stoner's…
This is just like democrats calling us Racists.
Lets stop with this stupid shit which no one politically relevant really cares about and talk about things which are actually wrong with the Left, and then back them up with fact.
I bet you watch Glenn Beck and Oreilly too…
I love all these people who spend hours and hours of Time watching or reading the oppositions media.
C'mon folks, even those of you objecting to this KNOW deep down how spot on it is. Think about it, how many times have you said to yourself when you hear the latest foolishness from these maroons, "what are they smoking?"
Perfect!
At one point, it was my intention to smoke hashish and listen to Jimi Hendrix for the rest of my life, but ya have to respect sobriety and done in a responsible way, can be a very enlightening experience.
Make a movie based on this premise — hilarious!!!
Dude, like I had one of them high paying jobs at Pizza Hut, dude. You are so righteous about the doobie.
From my brief stoner experience in the early 70's, I must admit Leigh's posit has some validity. The Obama administration is definitely detatched from reality
However, the history of totalitarian takeovers predates the stoner era by several decades, and there is a definite single-mindedness about this administration's mayhem, and the speed with which they are attempting to re-direct the nation that bespeaks way more harsh than mellow.
Whatever Obama is, he's not venal like Bill Clinton. He's not "cool" but cold, like an ice cube.
I will be VERY generous to the author here and take his lame accusation seriously for a moment: Yes, we should not have stoners at the helm of government.
Solution? Simple. Implement required drug testing for Govenors, Representatives, Senators, Presidents and Cabinent members.
Is my suggestion rediculous? Perhaps it is. Perhaps it is rediculous on the same token of this laugable blog archive.
These guys are currently *in charge* we have a Delta House Congress…fun at party time BAD at woking time…
Dean Vernon Wormer: Mr. Kroger: two C's, two D's and an F. That's a 1.2. Congratulations, Kroger. You're at the top of the Delta pledge class. Mr. Dorfman?
Flounder: Hello!
Dean Vernon Wormer: Zero point two… Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son. Mr. Hoover, president of Delta house? One point six; four C's and an F. A fine example you set! Daniel Simpson Day… HAS no grade point average. All courses incomplete. Mr. Blu – MR. BLUTARSKY… ZERO POINT ZERO.
These guys are currently *in charge* …we have a Delta House Congress…fun at party time, BAD at woking time…
Dean Vernon Wormer: Mr. Kroger: two C's, two D's and an F. That's a 1.2. Congratulations, Kroger. You're at the top of the Delta pledge class. Mr. Dorfman?
Flounder: Hello!
Dean Vernon Wormer: Zero point two… Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son. Mr. Hoover, president of Delta house? One point six; four C's and an F. A fine example you set! Daniel Simpson Day… HAS no grade point average. All courses incomplete. Mr. Blu – MR. BLUTARSKY… ZERO POINT ZERO.
They're using that very same report *clean their stash*… 'cause stems and seeds are bogus dude….
"keep them high enough to actually not DO anything"
Waitaminute isn't this exactly what politicians and victim studies academicians do already?
I was always of the belief that after doobage only had short term effects. But it may have done some permanent damage to an entire generation.
Now that harshes my mellow!
[...] Leigh Scott from Big Hollywood makes an important observation that appears to answer the chicken or the egg question about liberal stupidity. Mr. President, Please Don’t Bogart the Blunt [...]
"Completely crunked" LOL
Ya know, I smoked my first joint in 1973 and quit by 1983 but remaimed *in touch* with the drug culture through bands I played in and living in the pot corridor of El Paso, Texas and Austin, Texas, and I hear all these mythical stories of !functional stoners~ who solve the worlds problems and discover cures for Guinea Pig herpes and all types of great things…but I've never really met one…I've know a few people that held down jobs and made the house payments, but their Mrs. made 'em smoke in the garage, on Sunday's….
*functional* stoner=pink unicorn in my experience…just saying…and I've been there done that and a hell of a lot more..
the future-ex did a two year stint in the Fed B.O.P. for trafficking POT, long stupid story, not for this forum…
see below, I garantee that…
mahvelous, simply mahvelous..that observation is mahvelous…and DEAD ON!
Dude, why are you harshing Mr. Scott's gig?
I was a Wallace Democrat then a Reagan Republican and consider Rush and a joint to be as good as it gets.
[...] here: Mr. President, Please Don’t Bogart the Blunt This entry is filed under America – Blogs, Big Hollywood. You can follow any responses to this [...]
I agree with your proposal and will amend it with "…and anyone taking any kind of un-earned government subsidy shall too."
its about the addiction. the addiction to power, control, fame. the federal government is addicted and is joining the two classes of people bent on stealing the working classes money! the executive class of the right with the banks and the elitist lefties with these so called moral social engineering beauracracies… so the right and left will continue to destroy the american culture of individualism. the individual state control is the only way to remove the debt capitalist of the right and the lefts progressive idiology of collectivism and beauracracy!
economic power must come back to the states!!!!
The curse of affluence and wealth is that it removes people from the consequences of their stupid beliefs. And once people are free to believe stupid things without worrying about the consequences of those beliefs, then they will do so. This is why money seems to make people stupid.
Ive been trying to figure out the completely whacked Left too and this hits the nail on the head. I just wish it were as easy to blow them off and relegate them to entertainment. They have locked themselves inside the control room and its gonna be bad. Theyre gonna take us down with them.
not cool, but an ice cube. That is a memorable and true statement.
Note, tho, that ice cracks. It has not flexibility.
The people you are referring to aren't stoners, they're normal people that relax after a long day of responsibility with a casual high. Just like someone that kicks back with a beer at the end of the day isn't an alcoholic. My friend Larry comes home from work everyday, lights up a joint, and it never effects his job, or responsibilities as a parent or homeowner. He's one of those people your referring to. My friend Tony, that's 41 and still sleeps on Larry's couch, with no job for over a year, yet still manages to get high, is a stoner.
Mr Scott, this is one of the most delightful essays I've ever read! Dude.
It looks to me like you're the only one here taking this blog site seriously.
It was a humor piece. Can you say, "hyperbole"? Probably not. The "e" on the end is not silent.
Also for people who can't spell "governor" or "cabinet". Or "ridiculous". Twice.
An interesting and amusing piece. However, "stoner logic" is basically no different than that of my four-year-old granddaughter, who hasn't yet learned things like personal boundaries and delayed gratification.
She's not a "stoner", she's just immature.
Well, Gordy, I can certainly see where you are coming from…and concur.
However, I was thinking more along the lines of my own stonedness…lounging in raggy sweatpants, ingesting copious amounts of pizza whilst zoning to Zep and coming up with fantastical theories that not only would have entailed me getting up off the couch to implement but were also promptly forgotten once the smoke cleared.
(I was never one of those functional stoners. And forget about riding around in a car. I thought that every vehicle behind the one I was in was my dad.)
ANYway, f we can just find some good Panama Red and have a WH brownie party every week where everyone just lays about and doesn't ACT on anything, maybe we'll have a country left in another 3 years.
paolo, how about we go grab a couple of drinks at the local cafe and then head over to a strip joint and talk things over? : )
[...] sxc.hu) Tags: August , boomers , monthly round-up , small business , Small Business Boomers Mr. President, Please Don’t Bogart the Blunt – bighollywood.breitbart.com 08/30/2009 After a long day at work on a commercial shoot, I decided [...]
What about if someone smokes, say a joint every 1 or 2 weeks, on the weekend, relaxing. Goes to work like everyone else, pays his taxes etc., but likes to smoke the occasional joint. Does that make him a stoner or do you have to be ripped all the time?
Sorry,
Deltas would be WAY more entertaining (and less destructive) than these guys.
Duuude…genius! Maybe we should start appealing to their inner-paranoid.
"*functional* stoner = pink unicorn in my experience…just saying…and I've been there done that and a hell of a lot more.. "
So there are unicorns, just not pink ones?[[ /playingdumb]]
Anyways, this article was pretty funny.
Or their inner-munchie?
I'm thinking:
A Bag of Doritos in Every Pantry!
Mountain Dew for ALL!
Conservatives have always provided the money and logic, the Liberals continue to provide levity and the entertainment. Unfortunately it is time to pay the piper.
Heh. Agreed. I just hope the munchies snack run costs us less than 9 trillion!
I've stated at length the decades I spent stoned so I'm not in the mood to rehash it all. I did the everyday thing and the weekend only thing. It takes at least a month for THC to get out of your system. Then there is the exposure to reality. It takes a while to adjust to seeing things totally straight for a while. You also have to be in an environment with other straight people as well. Hanging around with your stoner buds (if that is possible and not imbibe) you are still around the thought process. I didn't document anything but it took months to become rational instead of thinking I was rational. being stoned all of the time also stunts the maturation process. You tend to be in suspended maturity level. When I quit at 40, I was probably at the maturity level of a 18 – 19 year old (when I started). Thankfully, after eight years of sobriety I'm probably in my late 30's.
Thank you so much for that laugh! I think H2U and GaryEaton are not seeing the abundance of credit you give stoners in this article.
Of course! anyone who doesn't agree with you MUST be a stoner! lol! And anyone who shows Christ-like compassion for their fellow man must be high! you crack me up , pass me on over some of Bush's cocaine!
and socialized post office and socialized libraries and socialized military….damn socialists
[...] Big Hollywood: [...]
because its easier to resort to name calling than to debate rationally. knee jerk reactions from both the far left and far right cloud the real issues.
Christ-like compassion? Egads, you actually believe the press releases? A Chicago hardball politician throws "hope and change" around and you fall at his feet?
Well, yeah – because grinding on the desk in the Oval Office is just so cool.
"They can't do that to our pledges!"
"Right – only WE can do that to our pledges!"
"Dude…remember the bitchin' weed we had in the sixties? Take a hit of this stuff…it's called government power…you've never been THIS high before…"
"Ohmigawd, dude…you just turned into…Nancy Pelosi…"
We're becoming one giant "enbabler" society, making sure the stoners and others whose concept of personal responsibility vanished after a year or so of daily loafing get food and shelter regardless of their behavior. A solution to the problem would be to offer them free trips abroad, kind of a "Marielista Boat Lift," ostensibly so they can broaden their mystical horizons. After they've blown through their dough, gotten thrown into the various crap hole jusgados abroad, sold their passports for drug money, and been subjected to the vagaries of what passes for justice in most of the world, those who come to their senses may find their way back here chastened and ready to become productive members of society. The rest, who have permanently lost the ability to think straight can just stay overseas.
One hitch: We'll have to pass a law forbidding American Citizen Services at our Embassies and Consulates from using our tax dollars to grant them temporary passports and fund one-way tickets back to the States.
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