Factually-Challenged Bill Maher to Conservatives: Leave the Oscars Alone!
by John NolteUPDATE: Welcome Farkers! Be sure to leave your snark-doesn’t-equal-intellect comments below, and we’ll forward them to the editor’s at Gawker who are always on the lookout for snark-doesn’t-equal-intellect talent. End Update
At least Bill Maher didn’t wish rectal cancer upon us. But The Least Self-Deprecating Man On The Planet does use his unlimited supply of smarmy circular logic to suggest we conservatives stop criticizing Hollywood, especially during the Oscars. His reasoning? Well, in his mind, it has something to do with liberals being smarter than us because they don’t elect unqualified celebrities to national office…or something. And how he manages to summon enough denial to spend a few hundred words on the subject of unqualified celebrities holding elected office without mentioning the words “Barack” or “Obama” is beyond me.
In order to hold tight to this theory, Maher has to dismiss Ronald Reagan as “Bonzo’s buddy” and Sarah Palin as “Miss Wasilla.” Someone might want to remind the former comedian that in order for jokes to be funny they should illuminate truth not attempt to hide it. But here are a couple of my favorite lines from his Variety article, the ones that reveal so much about their author:
Politics has become the safety school for show business washouts who are just looking for a way to stay in front of the camera[.]
Maher thinks he’s talking about people like Ronald Reagan and Arnold Schwarzenegger who seek elected office. What he’s really doing, though, is engaging in the art of projection. Unfortunately, Bill Maher doesn’t have a fraction of the self-awareness necessary to realize how well that statement describes him and his. After all, where would Maher be if he hadn’t turned into a nasty leftist politico — if the show business washout hadn’t become just another Hollywood Frat Boy who turned to politics in order to — how did he phrase it? — oh, yes: stay in front of the camera.
Whether it’s Harrison Ford waxing his chest, Janeane Garofalo and Rosie O’Donnell spewing as much stupid as they can summon, or any number of pathetic celeb-wannabes spouting off on issues-n-stuff, at least Reagan, Schwarzenegger, Fred Thompson, George Murphy, and Sonny Bono showed some real courage by choosing to step into the battle arena of elective politics where they would no longer be comfortably and forever surrounded by what one might call a trained-seal audience.
Whether it’s Al Franken or Fred Grandy, jumping into elective politics is a personal risk that requires grit and courage. On the other hand, the Maher Way of spouting off BusHitler jokes in the Happy Bubble of Tinseltown is not only the laziest most conformist way to hold on to some scrap of relevance, it’s also about as courageous as, say, taking Hollywood’s side against conservatives in Variety.
Moving on…. Check out Maher’s Epic Whopper concerning the film industry and government handouts:
Last year, Hollywood set a box office record: $10.6 billion. Sixteen billion worldwide. Not bad for a bunch of socialists. You never see Hollywood begging Washington for a handout, like corn farmers, or the auto industry, or the entire state of Alaska.
I know it’s hard to read a newspaper in the grotto but maybe someone should consider replacing just one Yes Man with a fact checker:
- Hollywood may benefit from U.S. bailout: LA Times
- Arnold Schwarzenegger gives Hollywood tax incentives
- Pork for Hollywood? Obama Stimulus Package Includes Film Tax Write-Off
- Build It With Tax Incentives, and Hollywood Will Come
- Hooray for Hollywood tax breaks
- March 4, 2010: Tax Credits For Hollywood
- Hollywood Tax Credits? The Shows Are On The Road
You can’t blame Maher for not being aware of Google. It’s a tool created for those who are capable of feeling embarrassment and want to be saved from it.
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135 Comments
Guess what Bill… you sell in Hollywood but you dont sell in Peoria.
Leave the Oscars alone? Guess what, you anus, we don't really care.
Last week on Hollywood Boulevard, a monkey offered me tickets to Real Time along with free bags of poo.
True story.
Leave the Oscars alone?
Bash Christianity all you want, trash traditional American values with impunity, but make a negative remark about some bloated showbiz wankfest and suddenly we need blasphemy laws.
Liberals like Bill are like eunuchs in a harem:
They're there every night,
they see it done every night,
they see how it *should* be done every night,
but they can't do it themselves.
Note: not calling Bill a eunuch, as that would presume he ever *had* a pair.
Ann Coulter I will forgive you anything you may have done or possibly will do that requires forgiveness.
With the exception of your relationship (Business) with this sorry______________!
Maher is the one example that gives evolution an argument that is hard to refute.
He isn't a descendent from a monkey he was ousted.
I forgot that I have to listen to a ELITIST, like Bill Maher…"ROLLS EYES"
Bill Maher's mind – debilitated by years of drug abuse – is as ugly as his mug… a face only his blind, reptilian mother could love.
Bill is good friends with Ann Coulter. Just think about that. I saw Ann Coulter on Red Eye and when Mr. Gut made a crack about Bill Mahr, Ann defended Bill and did not want that kind of crack about her buddy Mahr the slime ball. I have always been a fan of Coulter, but I think she may be just a phony only in it to sell books. I think Ann is a phony and Bill Mahr is just an idiot moron.
Will not buy Ann Coulter's book anymore, maybe will take it out of the library in the future. Phonies not allowed.
Bill Maher has jumped the shark – Lenny Bruce is more hip and relevant today and he's been dead 40 years…
Even if his erroneous statement on Hollywood's fabulous business as of late weren't false, it wouldn't mean a thing. Hollywood thrives on capitalism the same way other businesses do, and people are always going to want their escapist entertainment, even when stuff is going south in the real world.
Is it just me or does Maher look a little like Babs Streisand?
bashing americas #1 export: hollywood. well done guys. (don't use the canard freedom is our number 1 export)
Perfect Mr. Nolte. Lock, load, site, fire. You got him dead on.
Facts have a funny way of doing that to modern liberalism.
This guy is the epitome of a punk.
Evan Sayet used to write for this guy??? Thank God one of 'em got their head out of their behind.
So being a succesful comedian is cowardice, but whining about actors' poltitics on a right-wing website is somehow the soul of courage? You're a big, brave boy all right.
Excellent analogy, my friend.
Maybe they have the same face sculptor??
Maher is really saying "Leave all of us self identified elites alone, we who know better than you low life conservatives. Let us implement our part of the Grand Plan to bring long needed transformative change to the lives of all Americans, even as we don't entirely know what's going on and just how much we are being played as pawns by the Liberal / Progressive machine."
Back when Maher had his Politically Incorrect. Maher was a tool then, but nowhere near the degree he has become. I don't know what it is about lefties. The older and more irrelevent they become, the nastier they get. It's like they're bitter about their own insignificance, and have to abuse the rest of us for retribution.
Is your name really Susan Sarandon? I'm doubting it, and am having a hard time deciding if you are trying to be cooly ironic. If so, you failed. If that's your real name, you should have changed it a hella long time ago.
Maher twists the truth into something he can make fun of.
He's funny until you realize that he is all wrong.
Actually one of the few laughs I get now in the grim gray age of Obi is listening to Mahr tell the world how superior he thinks he and his self obsorbed, elitist buffoon friends are. Know one can really be as loathsome as
this guy seems.
hey it must be the TeabaggingForChrist guy, you must had to shorten your name!? to TeaChrist!??? I missed yah bud… and your snarky attempt at embarrassing Christians and all! Pretty cool!
But you are right, Freedom is not our #1 export… I mean, most of the world is in utter communist or islamic tyranny right!? Good job!!! We Christians are impressed with the ability of you and others to destroy freedom around the world. I mean, whose business is it of ours to DARE export freedom, democracy or notions of liberty!!! THANK GOD the Bible is banned in China, N.Korea, Burma, Cuba, the Middle East… THANK GOD!!!
Bill has never been with a women that he didn't have to pay for.
MechaMaher?
there's nothing American about Hollywood anymore sweety.
Shades of Brendan Behan!
Re:
Politics has become the safety school for show business washouts who are just looking for a way to stay in front of the camera[.]
So what office will Bill Maher be running for?
It is a shame because Maher did used to be moderately interesting about a decade ago.
Wrong but not simply a panderer to his audience's prejudices.
Dose anybody watch Bill Maher? Really how many a week tune into that BS show of his and his HBO special's. Looks like a looser to me. But I would still like to treat him in the same manner the hero on the left treated the Polish Officers.
Why do so many actors think they know so much about government and governing when so many of them don't even have high school degrees? Barbara Streisand and Sean Penn come to mind. Maher, despite growing up in a dysfunctional family does have a high school degree and a bachelors from Cornell. Whoopty doo, Obama supposedly graduated from Columbia and Harvard and his education hasn't shown me he knows much of anything, except excuse making. The Nation of Islam should ask him for refund.
Maher sure is ugly and short. No wonder he is pissed at the world.
Poster boy for small man's disease. Not much to learn from former Class Clowns.
And tonight Maher is having Sean Penn on his show. Now I have two reasons not to watch.
I think Maher needs to move back to the butt cave with Spicoli. Osama's got a great welcome home gift for Billy, too.
By "successful, you mean a sycophantic, Obama ass-kissing leftist Useful Idiot socialist stand-up comedian…
If there's a 'liberal' political 'pundit' in America dumber than Bill Maher, I can't think who it might be. A few actors, yes – Woody Harrelson, Alec Baldwin, and one or two more – but no one who has made discussing politics and American culture his career. If there's any point or principle on which he has ever been correct, I can't recall it.
Who is Bill Maher? Someone who is not as important as he thnks he is. Much like most of Hollywood.
I assume you kept the poo. It, after all, has some value.
Bill Maher has F**KED the shark. And lost.
Well, I suppose Maher can look on the bright side. He's only three "pull the skin up from the top of my scalp" facelifts away from having his nose turn up like Henry Wax-off!
And we both know what (*little!*) we think about HIM.
This motorhead has more cranial foreskin than Paul Begala.
If Hollywood is Americas number one export we should burn this country to the ground tonight. And I live and work in Hollywood.
What is more sad is your illogical assuption that movies is the best thing American can produce. Clearly you have never heard of NASA, Open Heart Surgery, the artificial heart, weapons, aircraft, US Marine Corps, medicine or a little thing called clean healthy food. If I had the space to list all we make it would fill up pages and stun your stupidity into silence.
I'm sure if you interviewed every illegal alien they would tell you they crossed the border because they wanted to be in movies right? You are an uneducated idiot if you think Avatar is the best this country has to offer. When Haiti got rocked I don't remember people asking to see a movie. They asked for the US Marines, Civil Engineers, Food, Medicine and Money.
Please just do society a favor and off yourself for being to stupid for our own good.
You never see Bill Mar <sick> and Freddy Krueger at the same time. Why is this?? Hmm hmm hmm.
Mar<sick> is not just ugly, he's the fact of pure evil. He also resembles Andy Stern. In fact all these National Socialists look alike, as if they had a common father. Satan anyone?? Pond scum is as pond scum does.
You should have kept the poo and refused the tickets.
Depends on the definition of success… if being sued by your butt-ugly common-law wife, hanging with the Ameri-trash at Hef's Place and continuing to hoover ginormous quantities of controlled substances at the tender age of 54 is considered "success" in your neck of the pig pen, then by all means, Maher is a HUGE success.
Sorry John, but you're examples at the end don't even come close the level of the bank/auto bailouts. States offer tax breaks to film studios because they want them to film in their state. Whether or not it's worth it to do that is an arugment for another time, but it has nothign to dow ith "bailing out" the studios. The fact is Maher is right on the money when he says that the film industry is an American success story.
Sorry for misspellings. Line 4 should read: nothing to do with…
Thanks
Last week, he said that the "disease" of sex addiction is bullshit, so at least give him that one for every 137 times he's WRONG!
Of course I'll leave the Oscars alone, Bill. Why would I want to watch a bunch of smug, self-congratulatory elitists grandstand in front of the camera? You get enough of that watching two minutes of CSPAN.
The poo was worth more, no doubt…
Yeah, namely flinging it at that unevolved being unfortunately pictured above!
I don't know who should be insulted more re. that comment, Shille Maher or Baba Strident…
Well, I don't know about that. Hollywood will give an abhorrant product and have your $10. The product may suck, but you have no recourse to get your money back! How many films would have flopped if held to the standard of consumer satisfaction and money back gaurantees?
We'll never know….
New Rule: No pictures of untalented, arrogant, wimpy males that look like The Fly.
Hard to give tax breaks to Hollywood when more and more of the industry is fleeing Cal. with many other businesses. Of course it's high taxes and business costs forcing them out. And our export of pure suck in entertainment is better than what most other countries produce. Lastly, box office is not profit. Many films lose or make very little money.
I won't watch the ceremonies, but I heard there is a "rumor" that a certain Mr. Hughs will receive a tribute.
Ugly, short and confused.
That was NO Monkey, That was Bill ! I know that because I had the same kind of encounter.
Years ago I had a friend that would tape shows on HBO for me because I didn’t have cable. She loved Bill Maher and would often tape his specials and “Politically Incorrect”, even though all I wanted taped was South Park.
I watched a few of the Bill Maher shows and quickly got disgusted as it seemed that all of his “jokes” were based on misstatements, distortions, half-truths, or out right lies regarding anything that was not suitably left-wing enough for him. I asked her to stop taping his shows for me and she couldn’t understand why I didn’t appreciate his “humor”. So I had us sit down and watch one of his shows together and I explained all of his distortions and lies.
She still thought he was funny and kept watching Maher, but she stopped taping the shows for me.
Moral: You can lead someone to knowledge, but you can’t make them think.
i am serious. If you wish to believe Bill Mahr is a good guy, then so believe it. Coulter may not be who she seems being pals with such a creep of a human being.
Maher is the Charles Shyster of comedy. Just as funny as the Senator too.
Holly-weird is the domestic source of Marxist scum fund raising for corrupt pro communist political candidates.
Stop buying Holly-weird's propaganda films!
While you are at it don't buy the DVD releases of their movies new OR used!
Take away their money, take away their fight!
now just look at that photo and tell me that self absorbed, platypus faced, jerk off has any sense whatsoever. If anyone takes him seriously they need mental help.
Successful comedian… sure. He thinks he is the George Carlin of today but Carlin had more talent doing talk shows in the 60s than Maher does with his own little pisshole of a show.
Oh, what a rebel he is! Mocking Republicans even though they're the minority in all parts of government and mocking the big, bad Catholics and Christians! No wonder he is so popular among people my age (I'm 19) because he curses, spews liberal talking points, and takes shots at easy targets.
Ah, Billy Maher. Somehow having a bachelor's degree in English makes him the premier liberal pundit when it comes to talking about politics.
I cannot believe he gets paid to say what some baked Berkeley hippie says everyday on campus. His show is so poorly written, you almost think he's improvising.
Truth be told, I am an aspiring comedian myself and while I certainly can enjoy people who differ from me religiously and politically (Kevin Smith and George Carlin come to mind), Bill just isn't funny. Hell, I can make jokes about myself and my positions, but Bill can't. That and Bush and Palin IQ jokes are about as stale a year old dog crap.
I agree. Even though I am currently a college student myself, a bachelor's degree from any institution is no sign of intellect, especially if you go to one of the so-called "elites" which are just brain-dead liberal factories.
There are few people who turn my stomach, but Bill Maher is one of them. Such a smug, sycophantic ingoramous.
For the record, 2009 worldwide box office — the total for the world — was $26 billion. It was international box office that approached $16b. Point is, you'd think that Variety would fact check the guy for at least that much accuracy. More evidence of the degree of liberal disinterest in facts?
Oscar ? Oscar who ?
Bill Maher is one of the reasons I cancelled my HBO.
Hey, Darkwolf!
The only way any advertiser for that self-satisfied (double entendre intended) smirking, arrogant jerk will EVER make any money from me is if they film a couple of those guys he loves to demean as red neck imbeciles beating the crap out of him. I would pay to see that smirk knocked off his ugly puss.
The only way any advertiser for that self-satisfied (double entendre intended) smirking, arrogant jerk will EVER make any money from me is if they film a couple of those guys he loves to demean as red neck imbeciles beating the crap out of him. I would pay to see that smirk knocked off his ugly puss.
Other than that, they're wasting their money.
Bill Maher is a semi-intellgent golem fashioned from smegma. It has only one misson: spread disgust and revulsion where ever it may go. So far, 100% success rate. Better than those enviro-Marxist climatologists, I must say. When not pontificating about wacko conspiracy theories rewgarding vaccines, it likes to spend it's time licking the inside of Sandra Burnheart's toilet bowl and deficating in front of school children.
I cancelled my HBO a couple of months ago. I really dont miss it. I finally got a DVR and now avidly watch Red Eye. Better TV viewing and I put no money in his wallet. Gotta say it's a win win.
I am often perplexed as to how people like Maher and Garaofalo and Rosie O' can spew such incredibly nasty things about people they disagree with, while at the same time calling them "haters." I don't understand how they can be so blind to their own hatred. I guess it is a simple matter of projection, by people who are really insecure.
Ouch!!! I don't know anybody who does it better than John Nolte, except for maybe Ann Coulter. But that's about it.
I've always suspected there was some forbidden romance between the two of them. Earth to Ann: You have plenty of much more qualified suitors out there, myself included.
You're exactly right, Missy! My do-not-watch list grows longer and longer by the day. I detest these people and they will not get another dime from me. I wish everyone thought like you.
Hmmm, have you ever seen them in the same picture? You might be on to something!
Cornell may explain the "friendship" with Ann Coulter. She went there too. "Youthful indiscretion" and nostalgia can make occasional idiots of us all.
that was perfect!
is that what he is??? ohhhhhhhhhh
I caught a few minutes of him flipping through the channels on Larry King. He proceeded to comment on the stupidity of the "people" and how they didn't really care about the issues (healthcare) they just wanted politicians to have a spine…pick something and stick with it….do something. He's speaking about his very audience…calling them 'stupid." Then you have Rahm calling his constituents "Effing Re….,ds…..and Obama talking to the people as if they are idiots…."let me explain it again." You'd think their "fans" would get a clue, be offended. My mom used to say there is the kind of person you could 'sh_t' in their face and it wouldn't embarrass them. Apparently so.
If you listed everything we make and excel at here in the U.S. he would just find the one word you mispelled and point it out. It's how trolls work.
The ignorance displayed in these comments amazes me. A few comments above I read that someone believes the liberals are simply projecting their hatred towards the conservatives. I think you guys are projecting your own incapacity to know the truth and see past the lies that you are spoon fed by people with an agenda.
Oscar, Oscar, isn't that the dirty green puppet on Sesame Street? Yeah. I loved that guy as a kid. He still around? /sarcasm
Billy boy wants conservatives to leave the Oscars alone?
Someone needs to remind him that we left the Oscars a long time ago. I'd rather watch "Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death" again…look that one up on IMDB- one of Maher's "better" productions…
Yet, sex addiction is real. People always say sex addiciton and eating disorders are true addictions, but they are.
I would not be surprised if her supposed "friendly" relationship with him is all a ruse. Remember, keep you friends close and your enemies closer. That's my theory and I'm sticking to it.
In my world, Maher is only successful at suckering fools and imbeciles to watch his crap. He serves no real function in society except as an entertainer and to that end, he only appeals to a very small demographic. As a father of a 10 year old living in the Southeastern US, I do not teach her that he is successful. When she saw a picture of him dressed up as a dead "Steve Irwin" and was understandably confused by it, I proceeded to explain what good taste was and wasn't. He was an example of the latter. Why people think entertainers like him are successful I will never know. He has a job, he peforms it and gets paid for it, but successful, I can not agree.
That is why we have on and off buttons on TVs. I haven't watched oscar since the 70s when the trend began to reward the person or film that attacked America and all that it stands for. We need these leftist malcontent losers to tell us how bad America is when their lives are a train wreck
Maher hates the world because he never got laid in High School so this is pay back for all those girls that treated him as a geek loser.
Maher is proof that Satan had sex with animals
[...] Issues: Actor Hopes His Critics ‘Die Screaming of Rectal Cancer’ And the same to you, thanks Factually-Challenged Bill Maher to Conservatives: Leave the Oscars Alone! Don’t worry. His HBO show will probably have a higher viewership Britain’s grey exodus [...]
He's never had a woman. His dates are all eighteen or younger. That little tidbit of information was Sandra Bernhardt's addition to a bad night for Maher on his his old Politically Incorrect network show. He looked at her like how dare you expose my personal habits on television.
Maher ISN'T a successful comedian. He's never has been successful as a comic. He got a couple of D-list acting roles in the 80s that made him mildly famous. He's only still famous because of the political talk shows he's hosted for the last 20 years. Nolte correctly points out that Maher is ironically describing himself better than anyone else.
And by the way, if you're going to accuse people of being cowards, you might want to leave contact links instead of a black slate like wr2. Otherwise you've invalidated yourself from the conversation.
If I could name an Unholy Trinity of Political Prostitutes, I would start with Michael Moore, move down to Janeanne Garofalo and finish with Maher.
I have a hard time getting angry at the things these 3 say (although I did take exception to Garofalo attempting to malign the good name of Rednecks) precisely because with every word they speak they demonstrate a profound lack of knowledge about everything they believe. Each thinks of themselves as the sole voice of reason in the world, when the reality is everything they speak is so out of touch with reality that one must wonder if they get their information by wiring tin-foil hats to satellite dishes. A simple google search could disprove every single claim they've ever made, and yet they seem incapable of that.
I look at people like Jon Stewart and Kieth Olbermann and I get angry, because at least they have an audience (such as it is) that takes them seriously. Those people are dangerous because the mis-information they spread is arguably credible. Maher and company are not credible. They never have been.
I believe they think they know everything bc they research roles. In other words, if Matt Damon spends 3 days following a Quantum Physicist around, he believes that make him qualified to speak on the subject. If you're in Hollywood long enough, it will eventual suck any trace of reality from your life.
You know those movies where there's a particularly embarrassing moment for a character, one that causes you to wince in sympathetic shame?
Whenever Maher says something publicly, I feel the same twinge. The only difference is that Maher lacks the self-awareness to be embarrassed for himself. It's as if I've caught him badly singing ABBA songs in his underpants in front of his bathroom mirror.
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