Universities Could Do Worse Than Have Snookie as a Guest Speaker … And Have!
by Greg GutfeldSo the pint-sized pasta-pooper known as Snookie was paid 32 grand by Rutgers University to speak at New Jersey’s largest college.
And yes, they have colleges.
The inverse candy corn was booked by a student-run group, using money from the mandatory student activity fee.
Now, some might find this outrageous. How dare you pay that sum of cash to a pumpkin full of sherbert when you could get someone like…. Toni Morrison!
I disagree.
I believe the Snook is an inspired choice – once you consider the pablum students have endured in the past.
Like Paul Krugman, a miserable wretch possessing the humor of sheet rock. Or that mad-tingler Chris Matthews.
Then there’s Alec Baldwin, Christiane Amanpour, Face the Nation moderator Bob Schieffer, U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission chair Mary Schapiro, and Rachel Maddow.
My fave: Gustavo Esteva-who once spoke at the University of Vermont. He’s a self-described Marxist, which means he really spoke truth to power that day. I bet the air was filled with spirited debate!
Anyway, I’d much rather hear Snookie’s laundry tips and tanning tricks than how Rachel Maddow got her gig (my guess: be yourself!).
And out of all the names I rattled off, Snookie truly is an American tale of rags to riches. She had no idea her life would take this turn, and she seems to absorb the fame and its accompanying silliness with a certain level of charm that you just don’t see in self-satisfied smirkers like Maddow.
And I like Snookie’s philosophy: “Study hard, but party harder.”
Although I hate people who use “party” as a verb, I’ll give her a pass because we both wear the same bra size.
And if you disagree with me, you’re a racist homophobe.
Jill Dobson!
Terry Schappert!
newcomer, Dan Soder!
and some other junk!
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85 Comments
Now this is the way to make cultural lemonade from the sour lemons of our slouching society.
I must confess that, with the exception of continually hearing the name on TV and seeing it on the tabloids, I have no idea who Snooki is. I surmise that she is on the (un)reality show "Jersey Shore" based on those tabloids and TV mentions, but that's about it. Why are we paying attention to her? Is there something I'm missing (you know beyond the stuff I normally miss like why Obama garnered more than 20 votes nationwide)?
I can think of an awful lot of people to whom I'd rather listen than Snooki.
Toni Morrison ain't one of 'em.
Greg brings up an excellent point. Given the lowlife criminals who TEACH in America's universities, having Snooki come in to speak really isn't a big deal.
Snooke? That's one of 'dem Blankets with sleeves that here so much about on late night t.v.-Right?
“Study hard, but party harder.”
Snooki
We need to internalize this idea of excellence. Not many folks spend a lot of time trying to be excellent.
Barack Obama
Now which statement has more depth of meaning? Snooki gets the prize, as far as I'm concerned.
Lazy Jack
http://www.thanksforthelaughs.wordpress.com
I was actually a freshman at Kent State (I know, but I got out of there soon) when Louis Farrakhan spoke there — and the university paid for it. And at the height of the "Bush lied, people died" years, the Golden Fascists paid Michael Moore to speak.
Snookie …? That's a step in the right direction for universities.
Now the profs. will have someone they have mutual mentality with. They can really understand Snookie because they and her are on the same mental levels. The profs. you know still believe Gore invented the internet and in global warming. Snooke is the best for this guest speaker job, only at Rutgers, ra, ra, ra, !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
O come pon now Greg…….
Yes I know the kids deserve a serious commenttator on the news and events like Snookie but hey Rachel Maddow is good for the comic relief. Can't you give her any credit.
I mean after all two minutes of listening to her rattle on and I am having a good laugh.
I don't want to hear any bitching about tuition increases at Rutgers.
A Snook??? Wasn't that Hillary's internal explosive weapon of mass destruction?
Snookie's remark was certainly more succinct.
Snookie ?? I thought that was what Monica called Bill's….ah… nevermind.
It sounded like Snookie was gracious which is more than I can say for a lot of recent college grads. She could have gone "Charlie Sheen" on those Rutgers grads: "I don't have a college degree – and I make more money than you."
My friend heard Toni Morrison speak at Princeton and reported that she's "weird," which anyone who's ever read any of her books could tell you.
And by "weird," I don't mean weird as in Weird, Keep Austin. If I want to read a story about a dysfunctional family, African-American or otherwise… well, I don't, because it's a waste of time. Paying Ms. Morrison to speak at commencement is a waste of money. Honestly, what's she going to talk about? How to make money by being mediocre (and kinda creepy)?
I don't believe that was her first college gig. She probably takes it seriously since 30 grand
a pop will buy a lot of tanning fluid and push up bra's. Students would probably
prefer Snooki to a Conservative like Ann Coulter where they have to duck spraying fire hoses
to get into the auditorium.
We had to sit through Nelson Mandela. As a college kid, I would've appreciated Snookie much more!
I would take Snookie over the wookie…
Did they hand out Purple Hearts with your diplomas? If not, they should have, for cruel and unusual punishment.
so greg, are you saying msnbc, or cnn should hire snooki for a talking head?
You're a better man than I am, Gunga Din.
FOR SHAME! FOR SHAME! FOR SHAME!
So when will UNLV have Old Man Harrison speak at commencement, telling the young buzzards DON'T BE LIKE CHUMLEE!
What ??? what ???, oh alright, it was wrong.
Did you never hear of the time Hunter Thompson was paid $10,000 in the late 70s (that was real money back then) to speak to UCSD students? LOL He showed up with a bottle of whiskey and ranted for 45 mins. He then looks at his watch and says that he must leave to catch his flight out. LOL
Ah, the good doctor…
We are paying attention to her because Greg Gutfeld wrote an article about her speech at Rutgers, HH. Any other questions?
I think you have insulted a lot of lowlife criminals.
Although I hate people who use “party” as a verb, I’ll give her a pass because we both wear the same bra size.
And if you disagree with me, you’re a racist homophobe.
Well, if that's the case, I'll just have to concede that you and Snooki can share bras without discomfort.
Nice to see a Kent State alumni. I'm a freshman Music Education major here. I already see the liberal bias everywhere. Our daily newspaper(Kent Stater) is nothing more than a liberal rag. Any tips on getting through?
All you have to do is watch South Park – Its a Jersey thing, And they will tell you what a Snooki is!! Now were is that Cream Fraiche!!!
Toni Morrison–the one who named Bill Clinton as the nation's "first black president." Whatever.
Years ago a friend went to see Alan Ginsburg speak at Arizona State. The place was packed, and he couldn't get in. Dejected, he went and sat in the building's courtyard, where he could faintly hear the speech through the glass doors. Suddenly, he heard a voice holler something like "It sucks in here! Let's go outside!" The doors flew open, Ginsburg bounded out into the courtyard directly in front of my astonished friend, and proceeded to recite some of his work. My friend and the rest of the fans probably didn't care how much it had cost. That was one appearance where the speaker actually delivered, and then some.
Very good, but the overarching question remains, why is Snooki worthy of Greg's attention? For that matter, why is she attention worthy to any of us? Why does society in general care about her and her friends' exploits? I've never seen her show so for all I know it is filled with brilliant commentary and serves as a valuable educational tool for the public. Somehow I doubt it, but anything is possible.
Please realize that I understand the point Greg is making in the article and it is an excellent point. This oddity we know as Snooki has more value as a speaker than do many big name, supposedly intelligent lefties. I really do get that point from the article. My question is why is Snooki famous and considered news worthy?
She is not "news worthy" but she is Greg worthy for a very good reason (I think.) Here is why I say this; Snooki is an Iconic representation of our, depth of a Dixie plate, reality TV culture. The .000001 value that this prurient-centric "oddity" has, makes an invaluable juxtaposition / contrast to the toxic anti-value of the progressives, and flat-out Marxists listed by Greg. The very fact that Snooki has next to zero redeeming value but is still preferable. Sharpens to an extreme sarcastic point that the liberals he mentioned are beyond despicable.
Plus the fact that she is "Iconic' or famous only helps Greg connect his point with that many more people. Since she has become such a recognizable reference point for his lampooning the left.
And if Snooki can be used to lampoon the Left, then her identity value has just skyrocketed.
Schaffer, Maddow, Mathews, Amanpour, Krugman, Baldwin, and Morrison.
How in the world can you leave out the world's leading expert in the art of goat play?
The four foot three inch wonder: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.
It's a joyzee thing me thinks. Pablum for the retarded masses. Wake me in 2013.
You insult Snooki, she's much smarter, well-rounded and nicer than the average prof.
HH, are you being deliberately obtuse?
I don't think he is. If you go read a random sampling of the posts on his comment stream, HH is a pretty solid, straight shooter.
If this lineup of speakers doesn't scream for school vouchers nothing will…
Sculls full of mush being preached to by skulls full of s*it…
The Snookie escapade serves as a reminder there is still plenty of pork in New Jersey's state budget. Go Christie Go.
I believe that I made that observation when I wrote:
"…I understand the point Greg is making in the article and it is an excellent point. This oddity we know as Snooki has more value as a speaker than do many big name, supposedly intelligent lefties."
I'm never deliberately obtuse; it comes naturally. Call it a talent.
No I was merely responding in kind to your post. I asked a simple question which is why is Snooki worthy of our attention and you essentially gave the answer that she is worthy of our attention because we are giving her our attention. This is circular reasoning and confusing.
I understand that we are posting in the comments section of an article that was written about Snooki and her relative value as a speaker compared to lefty types. You pointed out that we were commenting on her because the article was about her. My point was why even write about her? I even answered that question in my response to you and SavetheRepublic did an even better job of answering it.
My first post was merely intended as wonderings on why some people become worth paying attention to in the first place.
Bravo!
I'd pay to see that commencement address.
I appreciate the kind words. Unfortunately I do occasionally misfire as I may have in my response to Pol_Potsie. When this happens I just remember the old adage "if you can't dazzle 'em with your brilliance, baffle them with your BS."
As a resident of NJ which is probably the worst place anyone could wind up living, unless of course you love shopping malls and annoying "keeping up with the Jones's" middle class suburbanites, I would say Rutgers got the speaker they deserved.
Don't blame New Jersey. You sound like the sort of pathetic, unsuccessful soul who'd be unhappy anywhere.
I suppose when you tally up past speakers, this Snookie person is probably among the top tier. I know from one of my universities they used to regularly bring in idiots that whined incessantly about Israel. If they were trying to improve education, the administration should have spent the money on more parking instead.
I was completely confused by the placement of the comment streams. Forgive me. I thought I was in a spitting match when in fact I never was. You have attempted to be gracious the whole time. HH you are the better person.
Wow, that's a lot of assumption. Do you live in NJ or something and feel the need to defend the toxic waste dump that is NJ? I've lived in NYC, San Francisco, and LA and NJ definitely ranks last.
"Better person?" Moi? Nah, right now I'm not so much writing as I am taking dictation from Jim Beam. I just wish he would slow down so I could keep up.
You wouldn't want to be around me during a spitting contest anyway. I spit like Sylvester the cat, shotgun style, hitting everyone in the room I'm in and a few folks out in the hallway to boot. When I'm done it looks like they've been hit by a fire hose. I may not win but they never want to challenge me again.
LOL, this sounds more like a safety tip then a heads-up.
They could do a lot worse than Snookie, like anyone associated with the current regime…
So you're trying to compare New Jersey to two great American cities and LA? It's rather obvious that suburbia tormented you so you sought refuge in places that have a critical mass of weirdos. I've lived in NYC mostly with a stint in Chicago in between, but I grew up happily in NJ and people like yourself with your stale and witless critiques of suburbia are just a bad cliche.
It could have been Charlie Sheen – at $300 a pop.
There you have it, you grew up in NJ. I grew up in Long Island but don't feel any need to defend it like a football team I love nor derive any sense of identity from it. If people want to dump on the place I grew up in I'll join them.
Has anyone ever told you there is sort of, oh I don't know, prickishness to your demeanor? I'm sure they have so I would imagine that's no surprise to you. And no I wasn't some tortured freak living in suburbia who had to join a clan of freaks and bohemians in NYC. I'd say you have some witless critiques of your own too.
HH, I read some of your comments, expecting to find the paranoid, bitter ramblings of some old codger who quit following pop culture in 1965. Y'know like father_moray or amanuensis. Heheh. I keed. Or do I? Instead, you're intelligent and articulate. Hell, I lol'd at your Earth-movers, scorched-Earth and Earth Vs the Spider comment. So I am mildly puzzled by your current discombobulation. Whatever. Spring is finally here. Springtime. For Snooki. And Germany. Deutschland is happy and gay! I am, once again, rambling.
Create a curriculum to be used for elementary aged children. That focuses on… "music as a medium to facilitate the psychological vectoring for aspiring citizens to achieve a communal sense of purpose."
Then step back and be amazed at the honors and accolades that will be heaped upon you.
I wouldn't be surprised if they offered you a tenured chair position in the music dept.
Maybe I'm just spit-ballin here, but I hope that helps.
:^ )
I've lived in New Jersey. It was a fine place. Of course I didn't base my assumptions on the stale jokes of late night comedians, or some college sophomore "I'm cooler than you because I hate the middle class" stance.
You don't like New Jersey?
So, move.
I have to be honest; I am paranoid and bitter, but I'm only middle age and didn't stop following pop culture until the mid 80s when Michael Jackson became too weird for me to keep listening to. I am also frequently confused so don't let that bother you. Enjoy the new season.
WOW !!! I think you just stumbled on to another winning commencement speaker…CHUMLEE. Jackpot O.D. you nailed it. Someone needs to get Chumlee into the speaking circuit.
HA! You hit it on the head CharlieSays. The leftist default snark towards the middle class. Poor AnarcoSocPuppet bitterly clinging to his little red book, and secular collectivism.
Be prepared for a slew of non sequitur snot shots, what else do they ever do?
Yeah, I know, and this troll has always been a sad little thing.
Also, the one who won a Nobel Prize, for literature…like a winning Nobel really means anything anymore.
I agree, it ain't that big of a deal.
Count me in as one of those old codgers who quit paying the slightest attention to so-called "pop culture" in the 60's (though I wasn't an old codger then.) I found the rise of the "hippies" to be, at least, distasteful if not disgraceful. Whatever the "attraction" of hirsute, unwashed people was escaped me entirely. And, I could never understand a "sexual revolution" in which participants smelled like months-old, overripe cheese. It was at about that point that I simply threw up my hands and metaphorically "dropped out." The "fame" of someone like Snooki baffles me even more–just as I can't get my head around the idea of people like the Kardashians being famous for….being famous.
alumnus
"You sound like the sort of pathetic, unsuccessful soul who'd be unhappy anywhere."
direct hit, torpedo 1, Abe.
We are paying attention to this because it's an excuse to use "pint-sized pasta-pooper" in a sentence. It's not every day you can do that.
HAHAHA, you have cut away all the crap, and left us with that nugget of truth to the whole matter.
Hey, at least Snooki knows people will no longer using tanning booths if you tax them!
JBevel:
Here's how I got through: I transfered to Youngstown State. It's nothing against Kent State, but YSU was a better place for me.
My friends, however, stayed at Kent, and they just fought the good fight — the lefties will always surrender. Be yourself, be informed, and stand up for what you believe. You'll be fine.
Rags to Riches? Sounds like she personifies the traditional American dream — ironic, given academia's opposition to same.
With Snooki, listening to the unintentional humor in her verbage is really funny. I also like to watch her antics as it's like a morbid fascination with a train wreck. Snooki's headpopping philosophy fits right in at Rudgers, that bastion of narcissistic liberalism! How appropriate!
"Anyway, I’d much rather hear Snookie’s laundry tips and tanning tricks than how Rachel Maddow got her gig (my guess: be yourself!)."
Please – Bronzer! Remember Obama's tanning tax.
"I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked, dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn"
Now that would be something…
Well said. I guess that what you wrote was the point I was trying to make in my clumsy fashion. Whether it's Snooki, the Kardashians, Paris Hilton or any of the others, I just don't get it. Why do we know who these people are?
People used to have to do something (even if they did it poorly) to be famous; sing, dance, act, whatever. Now they just get reality shows and then we can't escape them on TV or at the checkout lane.
I'm old enough to remember the hippies and I have to say you nailed them. How they could copulate while stinking like possums is beyond me. I just assume that the cocaine they snorted killed their olfactory system.
Ok, that I can understand.
So, I quote from Ginzberg's howl, and that gets deleted by admin. I point out the irony of that, and that get's deleted too. I'm not impressed.
I've had a few comments disappear completely the last couple days. This has happened before, and it's pretty random. Software glitch, I suppose.
I hear ya. When my friend told the story, even though it was years afterward, he still couldn't believe it.
You have a way with words!
pint-sized pasta-pooper
The inverse candy corn
a pumpkin full of sherbert
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