Daily Gut: Pop Goes The Nukes
by Greg GutfeldSo if there`s one thing we learned recently, it`s that it`s not nuclear war that can wipe everything off the map. It`s the death of a pop star. Think about the things that mattered back in June: Iran, Afghanistan, Pakistan, cap and trade, that insipid health care infomercial – and ask yourself what happened in regard to any of those issues in the last few weeks.
A. Nothing?
B. Anything?
C. A lot?
The answer is C, but we just didn`t see it.
We know that some of our brave troops died fighting for freedom. Protestors in Iran were violently silenced too, fighting for a glimmer of what we have. You can also be certain that the opportunity to actively undermine fascism in Iran has passed – our President choosing “wait and see” over “hope and change.” He also snuck a few hundred pages of climate-bill baloney past us in the dead of night.
No biggie, right?
But I`m not wagging my stubby, sausage-shaped finger. In that same span of time, I probably purchased about 50 bucks worth of music on iTunes. I saw a pile of movies (including “Up,” and “Zoo.” One is about tracking a rare bird; the other sleeping with a horse – please don`t confuse the two when making plans with the kids). I caught up on “Daisy of Love,” “Charm School,” and the clumsy replacement for “Project Runway,” “The Fashion Show.” I now know that Izrah could never replace Heidi.
Not to belittle the coverage of the passing of “the world`s greatest entertainer,” in fact I`m in awe of it. But while Jackson took over the news, Obama made a deal with Russia – signing an agreement to reduce nuclear stockpiles by as much as a third.
Is this good or bad? Who cares? You can`t download nukes or fast forward to their best parts, so what good are they? Never mind that the whole point of having nuclear deterrents is HAVING them. And that by HAVING them, they are effectively a nuclear deterrent, whether or not the shrink wrap is removed.
In a way, nuclear weapons are like Stephen Hawking books. I have one on my coffee table. It`s never been opened, but it serves its purpose (it`s where I place the stromboli).
But here`s what do I know. if we are going reduce our nuclear warheads, let`s at least replace them with something we know can obliterate a city. I`m talking a years worth of “The Hills,” a million “Transformer” DVDs, and of course, the entire Michael Jackson catalogue. I`m thinking the only way to effectively beat our enemies is by making them as aimless and satisfied as we are.
GWAR!!!
Kimberly Guilfoyle!
Andrew WK!
Alison Rosen!
Me!
Email this to a friend | Print |
Share on Facebook
| Tweet this
| 
Follow Us on Twitter
Subscribe via RSS
Tips & Feedback
39 Comments
another 'Gut' buster…
It does indeed seem fortuitous for the Current Occupant and assorted acolytes on Capitol Hill that the unfortunate demise of Mr Jackson came at a time that cap and trade (energy surrender to the third world) is followed by nuclear surrender to the Russians (makes them more powerful) and, of course the surrender of our health care to government bureacracy debate went on as well…
As Roger Waters said- 'we are Comfortably Numb…'
Where was Hussein Obama when MJ died ?
Do we need to start a BHO bodycount like we had for the Clintons ?
/sarc
Wow, reducing our nuclear arsenal is like me signing an agreement with the FBI that if I were to become a bank robber I would now pledge to rob 30% fewer banks.
I can't wait for the 2012 Presidnetial campaign when the economy is still in the dumps and unemployment is still above 7% and Obama's campaign message is "Re-Elect me America and together we can Wait and See".
"Should President Barack Obama declare a Michael Jackson national holiday? "
If that happens I might have to go postal
/
They are already ssaying he needs more than 4 years to fix Bush's mess
/spit
You forgot the 1 in front of the 7%.
POSTAL is not the word!!!!
great points and greater "Caddyshack" visuals +!
"Unilateral disarmament under the guise of a bi-lateral agreement is cool"!…."ya I'm IN!"….."look at my abs"…"and my jump shot"….."NOT THE PAPERWORK! GUARDS!!! TAKE THESE INFIDELS AWAY!!!!"
Since you posted last night's Gregalogue, we'll have something new to look forward to tonight. Obama has learned the lessons of Rome very well (all the wrong ones). Although he didn't produce the bread-and-circuses Jackson spectacle, he certainly knew it was the perfect opportunity to slip major destructive legislation past the public. Who cares if the economy is being driven straight to hell when we can view a sold gold casket?
It's CYA time for the media; just like when Rosa Parks died. If they don't go into fits and conniptions and panegyrics, black activists (white-baiters) will gripe, "You're just not interested in the death of a black mega-mega-mega-superstar." You know — like Kanye West after Katrina.
So they play it safe, and try to appease the race-baiting industry. Fat chance!
That will only prove to them that we are Evil and somehow deserved to be obliterated. Hello, did you learn nothing from 9-11!
[...] Daily Gut: Pop Goes The Nukes by Greg Gutfeld [...]
I guess that would make Obama the character of Carl, who in his own blissful ignorance happily eats s*!t while telling us "it's not so bad".
It was a very shiny casket Lawhawk?
Greg get your priorities straight man, there are things simply more important than Nukes and silly Iranian revolutions like, Michael Jackson?
Never accuse Obama of failing to take advantage of a situation to sneak his agenda through.
It probably didn't occur to him that people didn't vote for his AGENDA. They voted for him because he wasn't Bush.
He's a pretty-talking dark-skinned guy who put himself out there as the "anti-Bush" and that was good enough for a little under 53% of the population.
53% of the voters – not the population. I know it's always that way – but this time around it makes me feel a teeeensy bit better that 53% of the X% that voted voted for him – not an actual 53% of the population.
sigh.
The day after MJ died, a thought occurred to me. "I wonder if I could start an internet rumor that Iran assassinated Michael Jackson to distract our media from their protester crackdown?" Then I shook myself, and realized that, the internet being what it is, the rumor was probably out there before the body was cold.
Still, I bet the Mullahs are kicking themselves for not thinking of it earlier. They're probably polishing up a list of drug-addled celebutards now, so they'll be ready for the next time they want to crack down on some protesters.
Except I don't think Obama eats the same garbage that he expects the American people to wolf down.
StanH: Indeed it was. I assume they'll be digging it up later to pay off some of the debts.
How about the part where it costs millions of dollars to maintain these nukes every year; a 1/3 reduction we can still blow up the whole world with ease. So the real question is why not?
90% of the above comments are some the the weakest arguments I have ever heard. The story is mediocre, but the Obama bashing is baseless, try again using actually real-world logic please.
you mean like the kind of insurance manufactured by "Austrian speaking" gunsmiths?
I will buy this reasoning. But don't try and tell us that this arms reduction agreement with Russia makes us safer. All it means is that I will be annihilated 100 times over instead of 300 times.
You assume that they actually buried it.
Personally, I would not be surprised to see him alive and claim to have resurrected from the dead.
Sorry, I have been out in the sun watching SEIU picketers.
Obama bashing is baseless
It has yet to match the Bush bashing level.
Wait a POP star died last week? by what I have heard he was the one that started the tide for equal rights for everyone and he should be held as a ICON for the blacks only.. not a american icon and the list goes on… now this
Should President Barack Obama declare a Michael Jackson national holiday?
Read more: <a href=”http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0709/24703.h…” target=”_blank”>http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0709/24703.h…
I gather all the other news in the WORLD has little bearing when a POP star dies…..
CHANGE WE CAN BELIEVE IN!!!!!
'1984' was written as a warning, not a handbook of instructions. And yet it seems to have become a guidebook for the left. Obama's Orwellian administration has been very effective in the last seven months by using a tidal wave approach to overwhelm the American public. It sometimes seems that we can only hope to tread water against the onslaught.
There are evil people in DC. True, there have always been, but seemingly never before so overt, proud, and in such large numbers. If the nation's capitol were a swimming pool, you could walk on water from the number of "floaters" present.
So now we've diminished our Nuclear Stockpile down by a third . That means That Our Pals the Russkis and the Chinese together out number us in Nuclear weapons. The Only time these Craven Lolly-Pop Liberals will believe there's Evil in the World is when One of Our Cities is Smoked at 35,000 Degree's Celsius and then they'll think it's due to Global Warming. These people make me sick.
Define word!
So are you saying that the administration orchestrated MJ;s death in a clever ruse to have the tail wag the dog!
Yep it's been posted on the internet people let the conspiracies begin……..
I'm so Bad! You Know it! …….bunch a lyrics I can't remember anyways Who cares ….. Who's Bad!
Obama is a fascist who has applied the Corporatist Thirdwayer policies of Benito Musolini.
Piebold Beauregard the 44th in his post on that Other White Meat blog has stated that according to the ghost of Shireley McClain that Obama is in fact the reincarnated spirit of Benito Musolini. So it must be true!
I'm sorry I should probably retype this is TrollSpake for you!
Yo Post is Lamo! You really SuXXhors! Why don;t you learn What HUMOR is! You ST1N5.
ClaXXorRibbleKnees out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
I'll tell you what I learned.What I learned from the Tough School Yards of Brooklyn, from 18 months in the Mekong Delta and from Helping to dig out the survivors of 9-11. Be Prepared at All Times and Be Ready to Go All the Way If Necessary. When Evil Knows It Can Get Really Hurt It's Not So Chesty. It's O.K. to Talk High Minded Universals when your nice and safe But when it's nose to nose time it's a different ball game Believe Me . You know what don't Believe Me go live your life the way you see it and Gods Speed to You… and Make Sure You Have Insurance.
You can keep on pretending that none of this is really happening; you can keep ignoring all the signs. You can continue to believe what you read and hear from the MSM, but you will have to face the music one day. And I feel bad for your side when that happens, cause while we all feel let down by our representatives and government, your side is going to be absolutely decimated by the undeniable failures of this man. I obviously didn't vote for Obama but I am just stunned that he has the audacity to push his agenda like this in this poor economy. He's doing too much too fast. I honestly didn't see this happening until the start of his second term.
You're right about the story, it is mediocre, but it’s a Gregologue so it's meant to be a bit of tongue and cheek humor. The Obama bashing is dead on and well deserved and you should be thankful that we haven't reached the degree of vitriol that was heaved upon the Bush administration. I fear that it is coming and it is going to be ugly.
That was Joe Jackson’s plan all along, they’ll just switch Michael over to a pine box and take that sucker and hock it, or maybe e-Bay.
I think that it's the higher quality bread and condiments they use to make the ahem, sandwiches. "Pardon me, can you pass the Grey Poupon"?
I'd buy a Steyr Aug, but they're still fabulously overpriced. I'm not a big Glock fan any more – but I would consider a nice Sig Sauer.
Typical troll post. Sniffs at the quality of the comments/arguments we make, but doesn't advance any of its own. When you do, maybe we'll elaborate on our arguments or counter yours. Where are your actual arguments again? Bueller? Bueller?
You must be logged in to post a comment.