The Perfect Gift
by Endre BaloghPresident and Michelle Obama have just visited the Queen of England. Of course, such a State visit demands a gift befitting her royal status and our First Couple has deftly fulfilled that lofty obligation with something that so exemplifies the greatness of America, it surely made Her Royal Highness swoon with delight. Yes, the Obama messianic magnanimity is not fettered by mere earthly limitations and the gift he presented her rivals in grandeur and thoughtfulness to the finest Faberge Egg. It is exactly what the Queen has been dreaming of possessing from the moment she saw candidate Obama deliver his blindingly brilliant speech to the massed multitudes in Berlin.
Ah yes… I can see it now… bedtime at Buckingham Palace… The Queen emerges from her powder room after her nightly ablutions and gently pads across the oriental carpet in her pink, fuzzy slippers to the edge of her royal bed. She calls to her maidservant, “Fatima, my dear, before I retire would you fetch me my video iPod? Not the old one, but the new one I just got from Barry and Michelle.” “Of course, your Highness,” she replies, quickly exiting the Royal Suite. Moments later Fatima returns, reverently cradling the radiant object in her hands. Tenderly taking it from her, the Queen puts in the royal iPod ear buds. Then, Fatima helps her out of her slippers and into the massive bed, making sure that the goose-down pillows are properly fluffed. Finally, Fatima places the Royal night-cap on the Queen’s head, and, as the Queen snuggles further into her down comforter, Fatima bids her a pleasant “Good night.”
Alone now, and with the lights dimmed, the Queen – trembling with anticipation – switches on the iPod and begins to watch the previously loaded photos of the magnificent spectacle of President Obama’s Inauguration. Her eyes wide with delight, she gasps in wonder as Senator Obama places his hand on the Bible and is transformed into President Obama. Then, warm and cozy in her palace bed, a smile of enchantment on her royal face, the magnificent words of President Obama’s Inauguration speech lull the Queen into a blissful and untroubled sleep. “Change… Hope… Change… Change…change….”





Subscribe via RSS
44 Comments
Fatima! Bring my purge pot, and be quick about it!
Who is Endre Balogh? Guess he's another Breithack who spends waaaay too much time trying to cut down our new world-loved president…in fact, this site — WHICH RARELY HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH HOLLYWOOD — is becoming a contest fro the GOP losers to see who can say the nastiest, trivial stuff about the new regime that is leading our country out of its GOP-lead 30 year , 'Reaganomics' globalization disaster.
Didja see the stocks today, GOP losers? Make jokes about the rebound – and tell everyone who is the next Celebutard…when it fact, it is YOU!
Remember how everyone couldn't wait to hear what Boy George Bush had on his i-pod…no doubt, he lulled himself to sleep with the endless lies of Karl Rove , DICK Cheyney and all those great liars Spain is going to prosecute for war crimes.
Everyone is gonna be singing when they get on the stand for the war crimes trial – get them some ipods —
but, of course no Dixie Chicks!
LOL!
…switches on the iPod and begins to watch…
(after 20 minutes of looking in vain for an on/off switch)
Endre –
The "Change" that's soon coming to Islamified Great Britain, is that ' Fatima ' (daughter of Mohammed), switches places with Her Highness !
P.S. Visited your website and was awed by the beauty of your photography. Such HARMONY.
I shouldn't be embarrassed by his gifts, but I am. I could do better, and I'm a guy that has a heck of a time buying for his wife.
The gift of an iPod is so, so commercial, therefore very American. The Queen couldn't possibly have been surprised ("Better than a batch of bloody DVDs," she must have thought). The real question we'll never know the answer to is, How much did Apple pay Team Obama for the exposure?
Our president gave the QUEEN OF ENGLAND the same thing I gave my girlfriend of six months as a gift. It really is the 21st century version of a mix tape. And it had a crappy play list
That's why I always tell my wife to tell me EXACTLY what she wants (or buy it herself with my money)
I may be male, but I ain't stupid
Another bad gift. [groan]
Between DVD's that don't work, an Ipod that she could purchase in any electronic store, and a button that says the wrong thing this administration SUCKS at giving gifts…I hope they don't get my name in Secret Santa this year…it may result in me paying for the bailouts I asked not to get…oh wait…nevermind…Happy Early Christmas everyone!
Between DVD's that don't work, an Ipod that anyone could purchase in an electronic store, and a button that says the wrong thing this administration SUCKS at giving gifts…I hope they don't get my name in Secret Santa this year…it may result in me paying for the bailouts I asked not to get…oh wait…nevermind…Happy Early Christmas everyone!
I guess she wanted something that she knew would work?
lol
Nice
I'd vote for a Bob Ross original paining.
Happy little trees and such.
… And then she plugs the new iPod into her computer, and all the files get deleted, because they were purchased on Obama's account, of which she is an unauthorized user.
I confess. I stole another line from someone and modified it. When Joan Rivers first got a gander at Boy George she remarked "Just what England needs. Another queen who doesn't know how to dress."
LOL…..I am so stealin' this pic.
What flavor is that koolaid anyway?
It's called "Blue Bile Ignorance." It's kind of like strawberry mixed with sewage.
I can't look at that photo without hearing U2's "Magnificent" in my head. I wonder what they'll give Bono when he shows up at the White House?
The stock market rebounded today because of FASB's decision to relax mark-to-market accounting standards.
I suggest you at least attempt to be informed before you make similar statements in the future. (For example, if you don't know what FASB is, then you shouldn't talk about stock market rebounds).
Barack Obama's administration has only done damage to our economy.
Ohhhh, I remember the happy trees — they were the best. HIs voice would put me to sleep, tho, before the painting was done!
As for the "Gift" — I don't really mind, but it does seem like when your Aunt Edna and Uncle Fred gave you $10 for your high school graduation, inside a card that looked like it was for your third birthday.
Kind of like, "thanks — yeah, no, really — uh, thanks."
Picture of the Queen that she just gave to them, silly!! Regifting all the way!!
He may just as well have given her an autographed copy of his own book.
Protocol is that you give a head of state a UNIQUE or RARE gift. Even the song book can be found at places like Amazon and EBay for about $40.
The DVD gaffe pales in comparison with this. An iPod? With 2 of your OWN speeches loaded on it, plus pictures of yourself?
How………narcissistic.
Uh … in English please………….
[...] Oh, and the situation is not at all the same as the Queen giving Obama a portrait of herself. The Queen, to an extent, is the custodian of the nation. She is not a temporary figure but someone who serves until death. More at Big Hollywood. [...]
an ipod loaded with show tunes and pictures of the queen…
was he in such a hurry that he just grabbed it off rahm emmanuel's desk and put a ribbon on it?
d-bag.
I'd vote for a Bob Ross original paining.
Happy little trees and such.
I thought that the Obamas were supposed to be classy. At least they could have gotten one with rhinestones on it.
Good grief, what's in store for the next head of state? A monogrammed Snugglie?!
I think Obama gave an iPod because the "Shamwow" he ordered didn't arrive in time. Maybe next time he can pick up a nice Hickory Farms assortment pack in the mall next to the Apple store.
I'm waiting for Obama to give an Easter ham to Israel as a token gift for the holiday.
"FOX News reported that, in fact, the Queen requested the gift."
Link please
I think Obama should have given the Queen a Sham-Wow. Have you seen how much liquid those things can soak up? Plus, it's made in Germany and you know the Germans make good stuff.
I am trying to imagine the reaction to George Bush giving the Queen of England an iPod containing videos of his speeches.
Brilliant man!
I have been hearing the NEW cover story that they have come out with, supposedly the Queen asked for the Ipod to be brought to her as a gift by the Obama's. Now this was never mentioned before they went over there so I doubt its validity but I can see the british press going along with it to save his reputation.
It's too bad Steven Crowder's "The Obama Song! (Official Version)" didn't make it onto the queen's iPod.
It's too bad Steven Crowder's "The Obama Song! (Official Version)" video didn't make it onto the queen's iPod.
Probably monogrammed B.H.O.
I doubt it too. A queen, who's been taught about protocol and manners since she was born, suddenly classless enough to specify a gift? Riiiight.
I have to admit, this one made me laugh, and I love George Bush, too. But then again, I know he'd laugh, too. Actually, I'll wager he's already told this joke.
But seriously, Bush did have a few good speeches. Just that they were only shown on C-SPAN or Fox, maybe.
Yeah, but they picked their oodles, remember. Take a look at the Daily Mail. They highlight how the FIrst Lady violated protocol with a hug. Jackie O would never have done that.
Even more aggravating are Obama´s constant apologies for America and denunciations of his predecessor. Wherever he goes it´s "Folks, I´m not Bush! America made many mistakes in the past but now that I´m here, everything is gonna be different."
That is not how you represent your country abroad. It is unprofessional, if not downright unpatriotic. It also points to great hubris and lack of reverence for the office of President. He is supposed to serve the country and not aggrandize himself. A mature man would understand deep inside that he is just a future ex-president. But that´s not Obama, obviously.
I mean, is that how he plans to sell GM cars, by bashing last year´s models? Naah, he´s always just selling himself.
You must be logged in to post a comment.