To the ‘Magnificent’ Guys
by Doug TenNapelIt’s hard to put into words what my father means to me. He’s old school. So writing some emotional, eloquent, diatribe to his greatness would likely embarrass him more than it would pay tribute. There is an art form to the minimalist compliment among men that I’m still trying to master. My favorite scene in “It’s A Wonderful Life” is when George Bailey sits at the table with his father and can’t put into words how he feels about his old man, “You want a shock, Pop? I think you’re a great guy.”
Part of what I love about my father is how he is a vessel that carries the good things from the past into the future. His generation may have brought some bad things along with them too, but we don’t mourn or fear the passing of bad things. It’s the good things that I fear are leaving us, and our society no longer produces men like Lincoln, Johnny Cash or even my dad. That’s what a father is, a vessel that ushers greatness into the next generation. Dads bring great things from the old school to the new school.
The only DVD my dad owns is “The Magnificent Seven.” The only video tape he owned before that was… “The Magnificent Seven.” There will come a time when Dad’s voice will be silenced by mortality and I’ll watch “The Magnificent Seven” with even greater meaning.
So here goes: Dad, when I was a teen I thought you were the worst son of a bitch to walk the planet. You want a shock, Pop? Now I think you’re the greatest man I’ve ever known.
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25 Comments
It's Amazing to me How smart my Father Became the older I got. The Greatest Generation Indeed.
I envy you Doug, wish I could say the same about my father.
You are very blessed to have our dad. And I'm glad that you know it.
That was supposed to be "your" dad, of course.
I was fortunate to have a father who believed that boys had to be prepared to be men at any time in their lives. Without overburdening me, he taught me true survival skills (and I don't just mean hunting and fishing). When he died suddenly when I was fifteen, it didn't seem strange that my brother-in-law said "take care of your mom, you're the head of your family now." I cried a boy's tears, then did what my dad had taught me, and that my brother-in-law reminded me I had to do. My mom was a strong woman, but I saw over the years how much she missed my dad, and how much she appreciated me taking up as much of the slack as I could.
I see the "moderation black hole" is back.
Dern you, you almost made me cry a little. Just had a great Father's Day, thank you God for letting me have one more with the old man. He's a crusty old Airborne guy and boy, he gave us some miserable moments growing up. Which in turn spared us so many much more miserable moments in our adult lives. Thank you Pop. And thank you sir, for one heck of a Father's Day article.
the reason your dad is so great is he is Dutch! He was not perfect but neither was I. I know our grandfather was a very stern man so be glad you have what you have. I lost my father when he was 74, his father died when he was 72.
Well, here's yet another post I can't comment on. Sheesh. I'm starting to get a complex.
Mark Twain: "When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could not stand to have the man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in 7 short years."
Mr. TenNapel, you have been blessed by God – you have a father you both love and admire.
Doug,
That was special. It resonated so much with me. My Dad sounds a lot like your Dad. Old School. A tough Italian firefighter, from Boston. Loves all kinds of Westerns. Growing up it seems like that's all we ever watched. Much like you, as a teenager, I couldn't stand to be in the same room with the guy.
As I grew up and had a family and kids of my own…I found out for myself, what it means to be a father. Not so easy at times.
I am so grateful for my Dad. I had a really nice talk with him this morning on the phone. I told him I felt bad about not getting a card in the mail but he said, "No problem." He was just happy I called.
I'm going to print a copy of your post and send it to him first thing tomorrow with a little note on it saying, 'I Love You Dad'
He'll love it.
Thanks Doug…
Happy Father's Day.
I'm only 30 and my dad's been gone a long time. I hope everyone enjoys their father's voice while it lasts, alas I can no longer hear my father's(literally, even a context no longer allows me to hear him). Even when they're gone, they seem like Einsteins.
Nice article, very timely.
Peter, I lost my Dad when I was 12. That was 39 years ago and I don't really remember him except for the good parts. I guess that's how time heals wounds. I turned out a lot different from him, but hope I didn't disgrace him too much.
On a side note, I heard the theme music from Magnificent Seven this weekend and I still think of Marlboro cigarettes. Does that make me old or a successful Madison Ave brainwashee?
My dad was 50 when I was born. We didn't have a lot in common, and since he was a career military man I naturally rebelled when I was a teenager. Did a lot of bad and stupid things.
I was caught smoking a joint when I was in highschool. I got suspended and I dreaded what my dad was going to do to me (keeping in mind that my dad never laid a hand on me in anger). He came and spoke with the vice principal and then escorted me to the car.
Instead of driving us home so he could diabolically torture me for smoking pot, he drove to a sporting goods store and bought me a weight set. "Instead of doing that stuff, do this son…."
He passed away in 1994, I never told him how much that moment changed me. I hope he's looking down and approves of the man that his son turned out to be.
Growing up, I envied my friends whose fathers were younger and more healthy than my own dad. My father was old when I was born–old in body, old in mind, old in spirit. He had served in two wars and already lost one wife by the time I came along. He had a bad back and a bad heart, so he never played catch with me. I felt neglected.
It was only much, much later, when I myself was becoming old, that I began to appreciate all that my father had done. He sacrificed much to raise his children, and did it all on his own when my mother died. He was sick and sad much of his life, but he was also brave and honorable. Now, looking back, I don't miss the games of catch so much.
The thing to wonder is if this modern generation of Perez Hilton's would ante up like those people in "The Magnificent Seven" or even enlist to do their part as in "Saving Private Ryan". When we lost the ability to realize that not going was NOT an option, we lost our ability to be considered a nation of men who wou stand up for principle. John Wayne, where are you when we need you?
I could snag parts of each comment here to describe my dad. I believe everyone could. Mine's 90 and feeble today. He was 42 when I was born in 1961 and was still a raw-boned force of nature when I was a young boy. There was a lot of old school stuff that I did not understand in the AgeS of Aquarius and Disco. I thought he was a narrow minded grouch.
But there was a lot that I did absorb, in spite of myself. Now, I am grateful that I was raised by a man who lived through the great depression and WW2.
Dad was stricken by Huntingtons Chorea when I was a young teen, losing his motor skills, then his higher brain function gradually over a ten year period. I doubted I ever pleased him, he saw kids then as weak,. I took over the family bills by the time I was 19, working to replace his income as his pension was tiny.
He went into the VA his last few years. The last time he still knew me, was in 1980.
I had enlisted during the first Irainian crisis, and he hadn't been told, … I had come home on leave, going to see him, to make my amends as we had many issues between us. I stood before him, in uniform, and just said
"hi Dad."
He couldn't speak anymore, but he shone, a smile so broad, I knew he had been pleased, proud of me.
That was the last time he knew me, last time, and I'm only glad that in that last visit to the man who was my father, he had been pleased by his son.
We made our own peace then.
What is up with that? I've had about 4 comments deleted upon posting!
What is up with that? I've had about 4 comments deleted upon posting!
Thorien, Shadrach from the Glenn Beck 912 Project. We are having problems here, everything goes to the Admin. and is not posted. Happened about four hours ago. Thought I'd post a comment here and see if you got it??
My Dad was born in 1940, about 20 years before me.
I remember watching the 'Sunday Morning Westerns'
with him. I see a lot of John Wayne in Dad's expressions and manner of speaking.
My 17 year old Son has been dealing us fits this year , and is overcoming some serious problems,( nuff said).
He is still at the "Dad's an S.O.B. age".
He gave me 'Gran Torino' for Father's Day.
We saw it a few months ago in the theatre, and my Wife said they had to go all over town
at the Boy's insistance to find a copy.
Eastwood's character had flaws, and I won't write any spoilers here,
but Walt Kowalski was one of those vessels you wrote of that ushered
good things from the past into his present and future
I hope my son sees that piece of Clint Eastwood in me.
He made my Day.
Well, I got it! Things seem to be working today.
How lovely — and meaningful to so many of us.
ReaderRedux, formerly Reader
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