A Few Watchmen-Eve Predictions
by Bill Willingham
Prepare for the ‘Gunga Diner’ lawsuit.
I’m not certain I have anything of worth to say about “Watchmen,” prior to actually seeing it tomorrow, when the rest of the world also gets its chance, but since I was very politely asked (as a comics books industry insider, albeit one who doesn’t rate an invitation to one of the six thousand, or so, advance screenings) to post something on Watchmen Eve, and since, as a professional writer, waiting until I actually had something of worth to share would be career suicide, I’ll venture a few predictions about the movie and how it will alter the American entertainment world in its wake.
1. It will be quite successful, financially, and will not, as many have predicted, suffer a sudden drop-off once the hardest of the hard core geek contingent all see it on opening weekend. This is just a gut feeling. I have no evidence or inside information to support it.
2. This success will inspire those who currently run Hollywood to do other “Watchmen”-like projects, only to be dismayed when they discover there aren’t any similar properties available.
3. “Watchmen’s” success will not then inspire those same those-who-currently-run-Hollywood to take the next most obvious step towards producing original “dark” superhero projects, not based on previous material. I suspect I know just enough about how Hollywood works right now to know that the twin fetishes of “Does this already have a built-in following?” and “I’m not going to consider any superhero movie, without seeing the graphic novel in my cold meaty hand first,” still pertain.
4. Therefore, adding to the silly lesson learned from the success of the “The Dark Knight,” about two dozen dark (oh, how I am growing to loathe that word) versions of previously not-dark (light?) superhero properties will go into production. Basically Hollywood is about to embark on the “grim and gritty” era of superhero movies that the actual funnybook business is just beginning to crawl out of. Get ready for “Dark Superman Returns Yet Again,” “Dark Captain America,” “Dark Fantastic Four III,” and so on.
5. Serious discussions about “Watchmen Two” will begin inside two weeks, but nothing will ever come of it, other than causing a huge and impassioned ruckus inside the funnybook business.
6. Despite all of the above, “Watchmen” will further strengthen the comics-make-viable-movies Renaissance we are currently enjoying.
7. About twenty minutes into the film, about half of the audience will realize this isn’t a superhero movie, even though it was marketed as such. They will be shocked to discover that it is in fact something quite the opposite in superhero drag. This will be a glorious revelation to the kids who were brought by their parents, thinking this was the superhero film they were promised, and a horrifying revelation to those parents (at least those who don’t simply drop their kids off to fend for themselves). A small degree of public outrage, and at least one lawsuit, will ensue.
8. At least one self-appointed victims group will express its indignation that the presence of Gunga Diners in the city scenes are an intentional slight against (East) Indians, and probably the Muslim world to boot.
9. Alan Moore, who wanted nothing to do with the film, will never see it.
10. The character Rorschach will enter the greater public consciousness as an icon of the left’s view of extreme right wingers — which, of course, includes all conservatives.
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46 Comments
I screened it last night. If it definitely a super hero movie. The fight scenes are awesome. The special effects are awesome. You can tell when it was written. Gives you that cold war feel that nuclear conflict was inevitable.
I love Rorschach was amazing. There was only one moment (i was counting) that bashed the Right when one of the Watchmen is talking about 'free energy' and Lee Iacocca said 'free . . . sounds like socialism.' that ticked me off. Plus the concept of renewable energy leading to all the worlds trouble. That was a bit heavy handed.
And at the very very end they bash Bush. I feel they bash the Leftist view that control is the way to peace. That was supposed to be the message in V for Vendetta. I would say the movie is the most politically balanced of any 'political' film. The end is actually very open and will leave you thinking about what you would've done.
A must see. Aside from everything, it's an enjoyable, well structured movie. And Rorschach is this Conservatives hero.
next halloween i want to see 100 punks in rorshach costumes get into fight with the 100 punks in joker costumes.
The release of this film has more of a Beowulf feel to it rather than The Dark Knight. I predict a big opening weekend and then a sharp drop-off from there.
Why not movie versions of Rick Veitch's Brat Pack, Warren Ellis's Planetary or one of Ellis' series such as The Authority, Stormwatch or Transmetroplitan? Wouldn't that shake-up the comic-book movie genre?
I don't know about all this dark stuff. Iron Man, Spiderman, Superman, and Fantastic Four all made decent money very recently. Hancock was a little dark, but ultimately fluffy, and made a mint. Furthermore, the "R" rating is prohibitive.
Can't ignore The Dark Knight's "biggest hit of the last decade" status, however I predict the studios will continue to support lighter fare.
Toddes — color me embarrassed. I was trying to think of any comics property that would be both A) available, and B) fit into the Watchmen niche. I could think of two things that fit the B requirement, but none that might be available. But of course The Authority and Brat Pack may indeed fit the bill. I'm confident all of my other predictions will be spot on though. I am a professional, after all.
If nothing else, this film will cause intensive debate, and both sides will love/hate the movie. I guarantee you Moore will see the film, albeit by a side entrance. A word of warning: while culturally significant, the film's value most likely will end there… many will be tilting at imaginary windmills after viewing it. Much of Moore's work is provocative for the sake of itself, and not terribly deep. But as anyone who would have a character named 'Rorsarch', he understands the viewer's projections… and their fears. So, for that he will be hailed as brilliant. Perhaps the Jonathan
Swift of our time.
Then again, maybe not…
The reviews are fairly positive. Only the left wing loon critics hate it, which means I will love it.
I think some other properties that could get the Watchmen-esque treatment:
Preacher, Sandman, Death, and ESPECIALLY Jhonen Vasquez' seminal work: Johnny the Homicidal Maniac.
Man – if Watchmen is making Debbie Schlussel's head explode, I can't imagine what Johnny would do to her.
Sure, Klute, but none of those are superhero-indictment stories, masquerading as superhero stories, which is that very specific niche I was referencing. Toddess quite fairly got me on Brat Pack and Authority though.
I hope it does well. However, I don't like my super heroes to be criminals wearing badges. I won't go into the plot so I don't spoil it for anyone.
Ah, true enough. How 'bout an adaptation of Superman: Red Son. I can't imagine the scrum that would develop over that one…
"Superman… Stalin's heir apparent?!?!? [ach] Can't… breathe… [gasp] thud."
JTHM could never, ever, ever get produced. Invader Zim was as close as it gets. JTHM is wayyyyy too out there. A whole lot more disturbing than Watchmen. It'd be cool if they did the Sandman stuff. Gaiman's work translates well (Coraline, Stardust) and they have a built in demographic (haha, goth kids everywhere would arrive in droves… like it was a Cure concert.)
Hey, they said Watchmen couldn't be made. Although, knowing Hollywood, they'd turn the disintegration of Johnny's house into some sort of epic battle between the Doughboys and Johnny set to the music of Fall Out Boy while Tess and Devi make out in the background.
I agree wit Bill about everything, except the last one. I think Rorschach will do in the general population exactly what he did in the comics community. He'll seem to be disturbed at first, but actually come away unintentionally by the creators, as the hero of the piece. Seeing how Alan Moore is a self-proclaimed servant of the dark arts I have no doubt that he intended the villain of the piece, Ozymandias, to be the hero. But darn it! things just got out of his control. For some reason, the unwashed masses, still admire people that say "it's not ok to kill millions of people just cause" And believe me, in our post-9/1 world "just cause" is exactly how Ozymandias's plot will read. We all know that any peace will be temporary at best. Rorschach will emerge as the hero of the film , as he did the hero of the comic, and will perhaps be embraced by conservatives. Keep in mind that for all his lack of personal hygiene, Rorschach is right about everything. There is a conspiracy, there is a mask killer, and there is something terrible about to happen. The only thing he missed was where to look.
I will add one prediction of my own. One or more idiot 9/11 self-proclaimed "truthers" will take Watchmen as evidence that 9/11 was caused by the Bush administration.
I think this film will resonate like John Le Carre's "A Small Town in Germany."
As a monumental exercise in someone's fantasy that is 100% wrong. It's not the Cold War. Nostalgia for the certainties (Liberals arguing for extreme measures to stilfe nationalism, conservatism, and producing a trans-national elite that would control everything, aka Ozymandias and Dr. Manhattan) does not jibe with a reality of the collapse of those institituions and a world of chaos akin to the Joker.
It's why Dark Knight did so much money, and why (sorry Mr. Willingham) this movie will do so little, after the opener.
People want and need films that reflect the social, moral, political, economic, and physical reality they themselves experience. Loss of power. Collapsing institutions and legitimacy (not the least of which is Bush's collapse and now Obama's collapse, no matter how much the press tries to prop up the former). Threats multiplying like Dragon's teeth, and seemingly unstoppable.
Indeed, the grim-n-gritty stuff has been peddled in straight movie form for a long time: the Bourne Films, Parallax View, the Conversation, Three Days of the Condor, Michael Clayton. It is tired, boring, conformist orthodoxy. Like Moore's work himself, the product of a world view forty years out of date.
Just like Carre's prediction of a neo-Nazi movement in the 1950's, this projection of the Cold War (long over) will have the same impact: something so spectacularly wrong in guessing that it's laughable.
The only thing that is really revolutionary and money making is straight up no chaser superheroes, battling thinly disguised AQ type villains.
You are quite right that Hollywood, chained by orthodoxy, will produce tired, and money-losing "dark" stuff, like the Liberal Wet Dream of Superheroes imposing SWPL PC and multiculti orthodoxy on the "stupid" people who are un-hip enough to live in flyover states.
Well, Debbie Schlussel hated it, and she isn't left-wing. Roger Ebert, who is ridiculously liberal, loved it — in part because of the foreboding Cold War/imminent apocalypse feel, which, as everyone knows, was exactly what the 1980s were like.
I'm looking forward to seeing it tomorrow, critics be damned.
I would pay twenty bucks to watch that. My money is on the Rorschachs.
I was going to say that Debbie Schlussel was already going strong on #7
It's frustrating to me that Americans persist in this idea that the medium determines the audience. Animated? Obviously kid stuff! Capes and tights? Kid stuff! Computer game? Kid Stuff!!!
I *get* that she had a very specific expectation and outlook going into the movie… I'm watching kid stuff! So when she got what she got, it was traumatic beyond measure.
I just wish she'd take responsibility for that.
I enjoyed Red Son quite a bit except for the last page or so, with time traveling infants and what not.
I think that could be an intersting movie if they don't try and change it too much.
"Why don't you put the whole world in a bottle?"
I shudder to even mention it, but they could make Kingdom Come. Its dark, but the Heroes end up being heroes (even though they give up their masks). I doubt (and hope) that hollywood won't touch it, I like the graphic novel too much to see it ruined by Hollywood.
I'm planning to write some sort of respose to Schlussel's two posts (and counting!) at http://www.infinitemonkeysblog.com. I think she's out of her depth on this one. I agree that parents who take their young kids to R-rated fare are fools — I'll never forget the family I saw at Kill Bill Vol. 1. But then she starts calling people sick morons and all the rest of it and comes off as a hysterical hack.
I'm looking forward to seeing it tomorrow and hope it does well at the box office, not just this weekend but overall.
I too fear that a successful "Watchmen" movie coupled with the success of "The Dark Knight" will touch off a wave of darkity dark dark superhero movies just as the original comic book series and "Batman: The Dark Knight Returns" did in the comics world 20 years ago. Should "Dark 'Mazing Man" get made I may have to hurt someone.
I think both liberals and conservatives will find something to like about this movie. The comic series seemed to be something of a Rorschach test for its readers with people projecting their own beliefs onto the characters and story. For example, I know plenty of liberals who will argue that Ozymandius is clearly a conservative because he runs a giant corporation while conservatives will claim he's a liberal because of the ultimate motivation for what he does.
I think I just had a geekgasm.
Schlussel's reaction to Watchmen reads like "Ed Anger." I'm looking forward to your response, Ben.
As did I – and it's obviously a strong anti-Communist message.
Which would get lost on people who only see: Superman! Hammer and Sickle!
Which would then lead to people like Debbie Schlussel shouting: HOW DARE THEY MESS WITH AN AMERICAN ICON!!! THIS IS LEADING THE SOCIALISTIZATION OF AMERICA!!! ARGH!
- "not the least of which is Bush's collapse and now Obama's collapse, no matter how much the press tries to prop up the former"
What press are you reading that props up Bush? National Review?
in the first ten seconds the joker will discover that the pencil trick is a lot harder than it looks. and then the rorschach will discover that the aerosol can flame thrower works a lot better than he ever imagined.
there is something new here. for the first time in memory, the cool menacing character that the sullen adolescents will identify with is a right winger. can rorschach imagery possibly cut into che t-shiirt sales?
i don't wish ill on the movie. the economic consequences of flops ripple across this town. but no way i'm going opening weekend.
I'd love to see Preacher brought to the big screen.
Having read one of the Sandman scripts out there, that doesn't interest me as much.
JTHM done in stop motion could be AMAZING.
[...] not. I’m sure she speaks for conservatives everywhe— I love Rorschach was amazing . . . [a]nd Rorschach is this Conservative’s [...]
Pour me another shot of whiskey. Well done.
I don't know if you're waiting for someone else to bring it up, Mr. Willingham, but i thinky our own (if you still own it) Elementals kinda fits the bill, yes?
So. Is anyone gonna post a link to that Schlussel post. Or am I gonna have to slog around and find it?
Rorschach is the sane man in an insane world. Unfortunately since there is nothing sane, he grabs the closest representation he can find, which is the "rightwing" magazine he requires everyday, and he isn't motivated by them, but rather, they are the closest thing to sanity he can find in between his use of face to prove the propriety of the world.
Also, the only other character as significant (in fact more significant) as rorschach is The Comedian who made the same observations. The Comedian accepted the nihilism of ignorance, Rorschach fights against it.
Were the Rorshachs one of the gangs in the 80's flick "The Warriors"? ….Whaw-i-errs, come out to pla-ya!
[...] (it is less a review and more of a preview/ramble – but I paint with a broad brush) is by famed comics writer Bill Willingham (Fables) over at Big Hollywood: The character Rorschach will enter the greater public consciousness [...]
I don't feel one bit of sympathy for those who won't like its intensity and/or bring there kids to see it
Newsflash movies get R ratings for a reason
There is no way truthers can twist the movie around. The government had nothing to do with the outcome. I won't spoil it for those who haven't seen it or read the book.
Rorschach refers to Ozy as a Liberal Intellectual.
regarding the R rating, yes its violent but there is also a long sex scene and for some reason they show Dr. Manhatten's penis about a hundred times.
Lord, I hope not. These particular loons aren't just nuts, but a corrosive on an honest society. They'll find obscure evidence in 'tower 2' and CIA-Mossad conspiracies, but completely ignore Bin Laden or Zawahiri taking proud credit for the deed… one hoped that with the arrival of 'The One' at least those nutburgers would give it a rest…
"10. The character Rorschach will enter the greater public consciousness as an icon of the left’s view of extreme right wingers — which, of course, includes all conservatives."
We should be so lucky.
Give me an American Gods movie.. and I'll be a happy camper…. (This from a guy who didn't get into Gaiman until his late 30's).
If the rights weren't so bleeped up, how about Miracleman/Marvelman? There's your dark side to the Captain Marvel/Superman type of character.
"I am a professional, after all."
Does this mean we shouldn't try this at home?
As far as mainstream characters go, they could try and use "Batman:The Ultimate Evil" based on the novel by Andrew Vachs. For those of you unfamiliar with the story, it's Batman versus a worldwide Child Pornography/sex slave ring. Personally, I'd hate to see this for the simple fact you KNOW that kids would see it because it's Batman.
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