ObamaCare and the Post Office
by Bob HamerIn “The Last Undercover” I chronicle my three year infiltration of NAMBLA, the North American Man Boy Love Association. I allude to another undercover investigation but do not discuss it in detail because criminal prosecution is still pending. So while posing as a pedophile I also spent three years targeting a Chinese criminal syndicate. Since I only had one undercover cell phone, when it rang I didn’t know if I was supposed to be the lover of prepubescent boys or a macho international arms dealer. The FBI dubbed the investigation OPERATION SMOKING DRAGON and it was a great case. By the time we wrapped it up more than thirty federal indictments (with multiple defendants) were returned.
The investigation included charges of conspiring to sell surface-to-air missiles, the sale of counterfeit currency, clothing, and cigarettes. It also included counterfeit postage stamps…yep, the Chinese were counterfeiting our 37 cent postage stamp (I’m sure now they are doing the Forever Stamp but all my connections are in federal prison so I guess I’ll have to pay for them like everyone else). I obtained hundreds of thousands of the counterfeit flag stamps packaged 100 to a roll. One postal inspector told me it was one of their largest seizures ever. I say all that because last week I had an issue with the post office and my “celebrity” status apparently carried no weight.
I will be the first to admit I think the post office does a darn good job. I’m amazed most of the mail I send gets to its intended destination, but last week the USPS failed me.
My wife and I were back in the Midwest on a family emergency. On Wednesday while bouncing between three states I realized I left my car keys in one state, was driving in a borrowed car to a second state, and the next day would be in a third state. I was returning to Southern California on Friday and needed the keys to drive home from the airport. Our daughter went to the post office and explained the situation. The keys had to be overnighted. They had to arrive on Thursday since the flight was leaving Friday. The post office employee was very understanding, provided her a price, took delivery of the package containing the keys to my pick-up, affixed the postage, and promised they would arrive by noon the next day. All was right with the world.
When my wife and I arrived to the third state at five o’clock on Thursday no package awaited me. I called my daughter who provided a tracking number. We accessed the automated system and learned the post office attempted to deliver the package at 10:30 a.m. but no one was home to accept delivery. My father-in-law balked and said he had been home the entire day. Since he is a retired minister I accepted his word. We contacted the local post office and learned the package was still in state number one. The original postal employee quoted the wrong price to my daughter and affixed the incorrect amount of postage, therefore they would not deliver the package. The deliveryman went to my daughter’s house at 10:30 to get the additional postage but she wasn’t home so the package sat at the main post office in state number one, far from where I needed it to be.
I refrained from using language I learned in the Marine Corps but questioned why they delivered first class letters with postage due but would not deliver overnight mail when it “absolutely had to be there.” The explanation was…it’s against policy. So the keys remained in state number one, that post office was closed, and my daughter could not pick up the keys until the next day, Thursday. Of course the post office couldn’t mail the package Thursday night because there was still postage due even though I agreed to pay the postage at this end. The next day when my daughter went to the main post office to retrieve the keys she sought a well-deserved refund BUT no. She needed to return to the post office where she mailed the package which was never sent. Now granted “rules is rules” but any Costco or Target will take back anything they sell at any store, seems like the main post office could at least give a refund.
During this family emergency I also listened to people complain about the long lines at the unemployment office and the fact the FBI didn’t respond to their complaints in a timely fashion. I don’t doubt their heartfelt concerns but I did remind them the same people running the post office, working at the unemployment office, and answering phones at the FBI would be the same people deciding their medical treatment if the Democrats get their way.
I’m sure my story fell on deaf ears but I’m checking with Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner and his edition of Turbo Tax and maybe now I can deduct the entire cost of the trip as a business expense since Big Hollywood posted my story,
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63 Comments
You should have used UPS!
I saw this level of "efficiency" with the NHS in Britain. We have UPS (or FedEx) healthcare now, why do we want to go to USPS healthcare?
I'm pretty sure Geithner's Turbo Tax begins with "Are you a registered Democrat?" If you respond Yes, your taxes magically vanish.
it's only going to get worse. one day you'll look back on this story and use the words "the good old days".
and hey bh…how is it that you took my 69 point reputation and downgraded me to a 1? what have i ever done to you?!
I think the post office does a good job also, but for express packages I use The UPS Store. A little more expensive but their hours are better and the tracking system is first rate. And you're not dealing with Civil Servants whose employment is guaranteed unless they commit several felonies.
Unfortunately, Obamacare wants to tell us there's not enough competition for private insurance (metaphor to the UPS Store) and wants to make us beholden to the Post Office. Not sure that's the way I want to go.
The entire purpose of the postal service is to deliver packages. It is frustrating when they fail in that purpose.
I still think that 44 cents is a bargain to mail a letter
The USPS uses FedEx for international shipments. How's that for instilling consumer confidence?
Fedex rules. Paying extra for peace of mind is crucial, and they are every Kinko's now. No that this helps you now.
I get your point – that the gov't employee policy is to never volunteer information lest it be wrong, and only answer questions of you know exactly what to ask. No anticipation of need lest you the employee be required to deliver.
Next step will be, China introducing Counterfeit health care, mailed to the U.S, using counterfeit stamps and payed for with a wheelbarrow, full of counterfeit dollars
So basically you spend 2 paragraphs bragging about yourself in a way that has NO relevance to your experience at the post office, to say nothing of health care. Then you spend 4 paragraphs to basically explain the post office lost your package, then tie it to health care with one sentence.
Makes sense to me.
"now seeing number 7,823……………."
And yet we see the inefficiencies of Government EVERYDAY people STILL feel Government run health care (or insurance) is the best thing since sliced bread… are these seriously the same people whose mail gets lost? or would rather take anything OTHER than Amtrak to travel long distances? Or has to wade through so much red tape that you think someone died, in order to get unemployment, medicaid, medicare or any other social entitlment benefit?
Are these people just gluttons for punishment to think that because it "works" in France it will work for us too?
One word for these people: Morons.
Holy Shit! NAMBLA is real and Legal?! I thought the South Park guys made it up.
I remember what the Post Office was before they began a lot of their privatization initiatives, and it was a nightmare. Today, I actually like the post office very much. They seem to do great work. To bad Obama is intent on recreating our health care system along the lines of the old post office. He should look at what fixed the post office. Too bad, he's too much of a fool to figure that one out.
You forgot "full of melamine and/or lead".
a simple story from ages past…
at one point we worked for the Post Office. Before the military, we did a 90 day stint as a letter carrier. 90 days is key- after that you cannot be fired, like all purgatory assignments when you are in you're in for good (sorry, David Gilmour). Just harrassed continuously.
At the time there were returning Vietnam veterans who thought, Gee, walk around in the great outdoors, deliver mail and no one will bother you while you sort out the inner demons of VC hiding behind every outcropping.
Not bloody likely.
One we knew, a Marine who was at Khe Sanh, had also just started. But he became permanent. And if you are ONE minute late you can be written up. And they messed with this guy- we, callow 18 year old- knew this was not going to end well.
One day we walked in and he had the supervisor in a choke hold. This idiot literally soiled himself. We didn't make the cut- it was a mutual decision, went to school and later the service.
Several years later the first Vietnam vet went 'postal' in Boston… that's OUR USPS story…
China doesn't have to introduce counterfeit health care; it's what we'll be getting anyway if the counterfeit Congress has its way.
Yeah, bragging about how he's helping to take down child molesters and Chinese infiltrators. What a loser.
Idiot.
Yeah, they had a problem for years — hence the term "going postal." But that's passed.
In terms of economics, efficiencies, quality of service, etc., they are miles away from where they were in those days. And they did it by learning how the private sector works, not by becoming more "government." Obama is a fool.
I have always said if the government can't even get delivering the mail down to an art form then why are we trusting them with our healthcare?! (I have had absolute nightmares with my local post office.)
I was just given this article; 10 Things the Media won't tell you about health care. Very interesting read…
ditto-
That's why privitization works. Now the post office is the repository for hard working competent Asians-
and we are a better place for it!
LOL! Depending on where you live, very true.
Pretty easy, wasn't it, John? I for one enjoy reading stories about people who protect us. I am guessing you will find your kind over at Huffpo or Daily Kos.
And now we're being asked to report on anyone who disagrees with Dear Leader's Great Plan!
Sign up the email address for tons of spam. Or send something like this:
To: flag@whitehouse.gov
Subject: Misinformation about President Obama’s Health Care Plan
Sir,
I found the following website containing misinformation about President Obama’s Health Care Plan:
http://www.whitehouse.gov/blog/Facts-Are-Stubborn...
Have a great day!
Whoops, she complained and they came back, with one added. Obviously not DHS, they do not do "customer satisfaction."
A nice find, M.E.
They do that because it saves them a heck of a lot of money, which is why they're able to keep their prices relatively low, comparably.
Or graduates of the government run school system …
I have that one saved in my FB links. I plan to print it out before going to a couple of local Townhalls this month.
I'm an aquarium hobbyist, and for most of the rare fish, you have to order your fish online and get them shipped to you. I don't know of too many hobbyists or stores that rely on the USPS to get fish delivered overnight with no hitches. Just about every shipment I ever had that didn't come via direct airfreight came via Fedex.
Actually, John's analysis of the writing style seems quite accurate. You've got to admit that the first two paragraphs are pretty much self-aggrandizement, regardless of the content of the post.
"Since I only had one undercover cell phone, when it rang I didn’t know if I was supposed to be the lover of prepubescent boys or a macho international arms dealer. " – Always great to read a post from you, Bob!
For many years now we have been getting email spam for Chinese-made counterfeit Viagra and Prozac. So now what, spam for "discount" hips and knees? I wonder if they will try to slip in "slightly used" parts. Ah heck, the government might try that themselves to cut costs. "This hip was pre-owned by a little old lady in Wichita, she only used it for three months, we have certified it as good as new!"
[...] government records on its “cash-for-clunkers” rebate program that would substantiate—or ObamaCare and the Post Office – bighollywood.breitbart.com 08/04/2009 In “ The Last Undercover ” I chronicle my three year [...]
whoa….
DaJoker say………….
I won………….and DaJoker know best.
"Spread the wealth"
Bob —
Brother…if I had a nickel for every nightmare post office, unemployment office, or DMV office story….
Yep… Logic flies out the window with this new bunch who want to scrap the best health care system in the world because of a tiny percentage who have trouble paying their bills. (hint: They just want to CONTROL us.)
http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/ggraham/2009/07...
I'm an anachronism. For I dream of a time in our distant past when hacks, carpetbaggers and charletans were dealt with in a bit less tolerant and sensitive manner: they were run out of town on a rail.
I can't remember the last time I needed the post office: I buy stamps at one of those Mail Boxes and More places, the same place I send packages and letters requiring more than a stamp. All I remember from the post office are long lines and long faces. No thanks.
Sweet… Big Brother's email!
PS. clever post btw.
God bless my husband: after retiring from a 20-year career in the Navy….he was hired by the local post office. I kind of feel bad for him, because I tried to tell him it's a government agency that still can't make a profit, and he just replies, "Yeah? Well, UPS doesn't deliver to county addresses."
That's why they invented cars: so that the customer can go and pick up said parcels.
Thank God insurance companies have seamless organizations and always answer their phones quickly and courteously, and the person who answers the phone is always empowered to solve your problem immediately, no questions asked. I'm sure healthcare providers who hire (on average) one extra employee to handle insurance paperwork do so because they have all that extra money to throw around on superfluous staff–nothing to do with bureaucracies of for-profit companies who make money by declining coverage…
FYI a locksmith can make you a car key on the spot if you're desperate. It costs but it gets the job done.
Bob we mustn’t question our Barry it’ll be better cause he says so, Barry’s cool…
That’s good Sojourner, you beginning to see the light.
Perhaps Pattiann has celebrity status!
The post office I go to near my work is friendly, helpful, couldn't be better.
The mail delivery, tho, at times is kind of an adventure. I usually get lots of mail, and then all of a sudden one day I'll get one post card. That's it. Then for the next three days, I get loaded up. That's providing it's all in my mail box, intstead of in my neighbor's. (And we have regular size real mail boxes.) Thank goodness we're all friends, so we're good about trading our mail around.
"We're sorry, but your kidney was not delivered because our clerk wrote down the wrong invoice number. Have a nice day!"
Hi, Bob! Just finished reading "The Last Undercover." I can't decide whether you deserve a National Book Award or maybe an Oscar for all the times you had to "cry" on cue, but at any rate, it was an excellent read.
The only fly in the ointment was the disturbing degree to which I was able to "sympathize" in a way with the NAMBLers' feelings of belonging to a persecuted minority. This underscores what's so wrong about the new McCarthyism in Hollywood. Conservatives are not child molesters, and we shouldn't be made to feel that way by the powers that be in the industry.
Bob – you should have let UPS or FedEx do that – as to the post office one thing I always remember when the Unibomber struck at a man in a downtown office here I remember driving by there a few hours later and seeing a truck with a satellite dish extended (a post office truck not news) and thinking when they really WANT to investigate something they manage to do it. Otherwise to paraphrase Lily Tomlim in Laugh In, "We're the post office – we don't have to care!"
Infiltrating NAMBLA didn't you feel you had to shower at the end of the day (and couldn't scrub yourself enough)?
DHS took the points patti, you have to go file a request to get them back.
I wonder if the Consumer Protection bill will address the Post Office, Obamacare, and the language that Congress must use in the future on the bills they pass. Clear easy to understand terms and conditions?
I think I'll stick with UPS and FedX for important deliverables.
Bob; I have loved your posts at Big Hollywood and this is no exception. We simply can't let these people get hold of our health care. As much as I no longer watch Saturday Night Live, I do remember laughing at a character played by Maya Rudolph representing a stupid postal employee who enjoyed getting to bust the chops of all the people waiting in line. On the other hand, at the local Loudon post office, the folks are courteous, friendly, reasonably competent, and in all ways likable. I still wouldn't want them doing my health care, however.
Best thing I have heard about ObamaCare: "It will have the efficiency of the DMV with the compassion of the IRS"
So your best bet with health care will be to do everything online? Wow, that will put quite a wrinkle on an annual prostate exam.
When it comes to overnight mail, most people don't think of the USPS. Why, pray tell, was that your choice of conveyance? FedEx and UPS are the gold standard. I get what you are saying, but you got what your paid for. PS, I read your book.
Hmmm, either you don't understand sarcasm or you're unable to refute what I said and could not come up with anything resembling a witty comeback. Better luck next time.
Oh… you we’re being sarcastic, I’m sorry Sojourner better luck next time.
I live in the country and UPS delivers here in South Dakota to my 911 address.
[...] ObamaCare and the Post Office from Big Hollywood. [...]
Wait, so the point wasn't that YOU forgot your keys, it's that a post office employee screwed up? Why didn't you hire a private courier? Or, you know, have a spare?
And, btw, have you ever dealt with Blue Cross/Blue Shield? I'm thinking you got a better choice, and FTW. Am I close?
…more like, "Spread the pain."
Going to call b.s. on this story. As a 22 year postal veteran, I can tell you the odds of a USPS career window clerk affixing the wrong postage on an express mail envelope is near zero. One of the reasons the lines move so slow is that window clerks are expected to never make a mistake and they take the time to insure that they don't. A package that light would have been flat rate, so there would be no "quoting" of a price. Also, USPS policy is to deliver every overnight package that has postage on it. If the postage is not enough, it is attempted with postage due. It would never have been left at the mailing office. Sadly this is just another intellectually weak shot at the 500,000 dedicated postal workers, many of whom are Vietnam and Gulf war veterans, by someone looking for an easy target. Nice going, pal.
Hamer wants to avoid personal responsibility by scapegoating. Then he concludes by bragging that he'd like to expense the government for the whole mess. What a piece of work.
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