For one thing, I can’t sleep because I absent-mindedly forgot to include three of my favorite Freedom Fighters in my Truth Tellers list, Levin, Malkin and Coulter. I love them.  If they ever find out that I forgot to mention them in my last blog, they will forever not know how much I respect/honor them.  This is giving me a headache, and making me chew off all of my new fake fingernails.  I can’t even enjoy my rented DVD Season Two Compilation of “Mad Men.”  Oh, and I love Stossel, Gallagher, Stein and Morris too! 

Okay, then I find out Gingrich is pal-ing up with Pelosi about Global Warming!  Eww!  Defector!  Oh man!  Strike him off my list.  Now!  He’s off!    

Picking leaders is painful. Voting.  If you put their name up on your car, or in your yard or tattoo it to your face, you are suddenly responsible for every move they make and every word they say.  Too much pressure. 

Thirdly, I cannot bear the hatred of the Left.  Their comments.  The look on their faces in my rear view mirror when I see them noticing my “Fox News: Truth” bumper sticker, or my “Glenn Beck” bumper sticker, or my “Okay, joke’s over.  Bring back the Constitution” bumper sticker.  Their snide glances and snaps of disgust.  I can’t take it anymore.  Hatred hurts. 

Fourthly, I start college tomorrow.  It’s my last class.  Science 101.  I need to focus.  I started my college degree, a Bachelor of Arts in Theatre, in 1976.  I had to stop and work, you know, to pay for it. College tuition is expensive.  Then, there was the six-year “Saturday Night Live” distraction in NY, and the 15 years of raising a family in Miami distraction.  But now, I’m back and ready to finish my degree.  I took all the fun classes first and left the “vegetables” for last.  So, I just finished Math, and now Science.  How timely though, because now I can become an expert on Climate Change and explain to Gore, Pelosi and Obama how ridiculous their hoax is, if I can catch them between their fuel-guzzling, earth killing, private jet trips. I mean, really. (Nancy’s private jet costs taxpayers $60,000 one way for the trip she takes weekly to D.C. where she is working hard to take our freedoms away!)

FACT:   More greenhouse gases are emitted from one volcano than all the automobiles ever made of all time.  (”Deb and Seby’s Real Deal on Global Warming” by Al Sonja Schmidt.)  So, humans are not  responsible for the weather.  Whatever Communist replaces Van Jones, the Green Jobs Czar should read that book and the book, “Heaven and Earth” by Ian Plimer, and see the movie, “Not Evil, Just Wrong.” But the Obama Administration doesn’t care about the FACTS!  They are using this Green Scam to continue the economic destruction of America.  It’s so obvious!  The Stimulus Package did not create jobs, it paid back O’s friends for voting for him.  Free Enterprise and Capitalism create jobs.  Capitalism would save our economy.  But no, Obama can’t do that!  He’s a Marxist!  Spread the Wealth!  Kill production!  Obamacare/Socialized Medicine and Cap N Trade/Tax are huge boulders that will crash our economy.  The Government controlled Health Care would cripple small businesses that couldn’t compete with the “public option” (hurts my mouth to say it), and the Cap N Trade/Tax would do the same.  Jobs would go overseas where they have no energy limitations.  Can’t somebody stop this?! 

OBAMA IS TRYING TO DESTROY AMERICA!!!! 

Obama’s plan is so obvious, people don’t see it.  It’s under their noses. 

Once our economy is dead, we will have to lean on the government for everything and his evil plan will be complete.  He’ll probably rename our country Obamica.  He’ll make a law that says his presidential term is limitless, like his friends Chavez, Castro, Stalin, Lenin, Mao, etc.  He’ll rule with his oligarchy, Jarrett, Reid, Pelosi, Frank and Soros, etc.  They’ll all be fat and happy, smoking and playing basketball, and we’ll all be sad, poor, depressed Communists. 

I will not let that happen to my free country!!   

Can I fight for freedom without being involved in icky politics? 

(Side Note:  Speaking of humans affecting the climate, there was an “X Files Episode” called “The Rain King” where I got to play a woman whose emotions affected the weather!  When I cried, it rained !  My character also had to kiss David Duchovny on the mouth!  But, I digress.)

 Back to why I am quitting politics; 

Fifthly, politics is boring.  Super boring. 

Sixthly, politics is mean.  Everyone’s so mean to each other. 

But, politics can’t be ignored even if you try to ignore it.  It overlaps every part of our lives.  Have you seen the new video of the British Lord who is warning us about the upcoming Climate Change Summit where the world leaders will use the Global Warming scam to get money from the U.S. (middle class taxpayers again) AND use it, the Green Scam as an excuse to create a ONE WORLD GOVERNMENT?!  

– 

I have heard this Biblical Prophecy in church  since I was 6 years old!  (Revelation by the Apostle John dated A.D. 81-96 and Matthew 24, Mark 13 and ”When The World Will Be As One” by Tal Brooke copyright 1989).  Who knew it would be a Green Scam that would initiate this prophecy’s fulfillment?  Green sounds so harmless.  Who doesn’t love the Earth?!  With all these “end times” signs becoming reality; Famine, War, The Breakup of the Family Unit, Earthquakes, Christians hated/tortured, (the Organization of the Islamic Conference (OIC), comprised of 57 Muslim nations, is vigorously pushing the U.N. to vote yet again on a cleverly worded ”tolerance” resolution, which would criminalize the proclamation of the Gospel!), False Prophets, Gospel Preached around the world, and now One World Government….  

…The Question Becomes:  If this is the end…what should we do?  Get involved politically and fight for our freedom or just sit at home, watch “Mad Men” and wait for Jesus to return? 

Gary Shandling said on Joy Behar’s show the other day, (sarcastically) “Isn’t Jesus supposed to be here by now?”  I said to the TV, “He’s waiting for you Gary.”  (”It is appointed onto man once to die, after this the judgement.” Hebrews 9:27)  

I would rather talk about God than politics.  

But, I can’t talk about God if I don’t have Freedom of Speech!! 

So…I guess… I really can’t quit politics. 

And, neither can you!  Get Involved! 

Patrick Henry would want you to:

I’m getting my fake fingernails put on and I’m thinking of you. I have a pitch meeting at Pie Town tomorrow and I chewed all my real fingernails off last night watching Anita Dunn express her admiration for Mao Tse Tung.  Thank you for exposing yet another enemy of our freedom.  You are so passionate and curious and smart and real.  Sigh.  I look at my Vietnamese manicurist and pedicurist and smile.  I ask them their names.  Katie.  Kathy.  Hmm.  I glance around the nail salon.  The decor is Greek columns with 1920’s lamps in between. There is a 1970’s Disco Bar in the middle of the room with a 1930’s Art Deco Chandelier in the center.  There is a Faux Greek Mural and then Post Modern New Age Sterile Minimalist Lights sprinkled in between.  It’s “Psychedelic International.”  Just like the New America.  I ask Katie and Kathy what their real names are.  They look at me suspiciously. Hang and Gnoc.  Okay. 

The woman next to me is speaking Armenian into her cell phone.  I can’t really discuss politics with Katie and Kathy, language barrier, so I glance at the TIME magazine next to my arm.  Some liberal, Joe Klein is trying to tell the truth about ObamaCare, but not quite pulling it off.  Then, he attacks my Rush and my Beck and my heart speeds up. My cheeks turn red.  He writes, “…it is also possible that the Limbaugh and Glenn Beck – inspired poison will spread from right-wing nutters to moderates and independents…”  Poison?  Poison? 

Truth… is Poison to the guilty.  It stings. 

Glenn Beck, I must confess I love the other Truth Tellers too; Breitbart, Giles, O’Keefe, Hannity, Ziegler, Rush, Rove, Crowley, Ingraham, Hewitt, Huckabee, Jindal, Miller, Palin, Prager, Pawlenty, Weaver, Gingrich, Keyes, and of course, Jesus, the Ultimate Truth. (John 14:6) 

But I must especially thank you Glenn Beck for your blackboard.  I love your blackboard!  And your thorough research. Your facts. Your diagrams. Your teaching.  Finally, someone is clearly explaining to us, the taxpayers, exactly what is happening inside that mysterious, gigantic, corrupt political system we have.  We, the working middle class, have always been afraid of the machine, and I think the politicians/criminals wanted it that way.  With their pompous, pious faces and sneaky hands, they have been stealing and lying.  We were too busy raising children, working and going to church to have time to research them.  Now, finally, one man has done it. Cracked the Code.  Exposed the Fraud. Shone the Light on the Basement Rats! Now, the rats are all scurrying around, all nervous.  They are calling The Man With The Flashlight names.  Mean names.  Squeak!  Squeak! 

Glenn Beck, thank you for answering my questions.  One day I was wondering who those “czars” were who had slipped into the White House, under the radar…I flipped your show on, and you told me!  It’s like you read my mind!  One day I was wondering what real doctors think of ObamaCare, not the fake doctors Obama rigged for his photo shoot, but real ones.  I popped on your show, and there you all were…debating, having a real discussion, like grown ups.  Obama’s speeches are all fake and they say nothing. Cotton candy for stupid people.  But, you Glenn Beck, you are a thinker.  Like me. You are unbiased.  Like me.  You are simply seeking Truth, just like me. 

If one day, Glenn Beck, you become embroiled in a scandal, and you turn out to be imperfect as all heroes put up on pedestals turn out to be, I will forgive you and forever be grateful for one thing…the elegant way you introduced the Green Jobs Czar, Mr. Van Jones to the public and then ushered him silently out the door.  That was awesome! ( It also helps me prove the fact that Obama is a Communist.  A Capitalist would not appoint a Communist as an advisor! )  It was as exciting as watching Giles/O’Keefe/Breitbart bring down the corrupt Acorn.  This is great stuff!  To you heroes, we thank you.  We really, really, really love you.  You’re cool.  You’re  brave.  You’re smart.  And, you tell the truth! 

The truth has a beautiful ring to it.  It pours smoothly through the ears and forms a golden, peaceful puddle in the heart.  It reassures one that there is still a drop of good in the world.  Truth is Beautiful.  

I took my beautiful fake nails out to my car and drove to the car wash.  Hard working, friendly Mexicans made it shiny. I don’t know if they were legal or illegal.  I love everyone, but I think rules should be followed.  Why can’t they be legal?  Is it difficult?  You’ll probably explain Amnesty to me tomorrow on TV, because you always know what I’m thinking.  I did those minimum wage jobs for years, working my way up the Capitalist ladder.  I did it with a happy heart looking forward to the day when I could have a great job!  But, while Obama romances the racial minorities; defending Professor Gates, picking Sotomayor, having Latin dance parties, and hinting at Amnesty,  don’t the minorities realize that if Obama continues to destroy Capitalism they will always be stuck on the bottom rung?  There will be no Capitalist ladder. 

Glenn Beck, I like your solution, “Replace the corrupt Congress.”  Good plan.  I’m studying the candidates right now.  Jindal is good.  Handstands for Huckabee.  Palin for President. 

Glenn Beck, thank you for 9/12.  I went to the Westwood, CA  9/12.  See my handmade poster, behind my handstand? 

I went to the sign making place today.  I designed a Glenn Beck bumper sticker  because you don’t sell one on your website. Humility is sexy!  It’s so rare these days. 

If that new “Diversity Czar,” Mark Lloyd or his evil boss ever try to take away my Fox News, my Hannity, my Radio Shows, or my Glenn Beck, they are in big trouble, because I won’t let you go.  I won’t let you go. 

Love always, 
Victoria Jackson  xxoo 

P.S. Joy Behar hates you, so you must be doing something right!

(Applause. The air is titillating.  The mood rambunctious.  The atmosphere tense.  Over the loud speaker we hear, “3, 2, 1 and …”) 

Joy:  Hello, Victoria.  So, I hear you’re a Tea Partier!  (Sarcastic smile.  Eyes roll.)

Victoria:  Oh, well… 

Joy:  I suppose you like Sarah Palin!  (Sarcastic smile.  Eyes roll.) 

Victoria:  Oh, well, I love her, she is so… 

Joy:  She is so dumb!  (Sarcastic smile.  Eyes roll.) 

Victoria:  No, I don’t think that… 

Joy:  Just like George Bush.  He was an idiot!  (Sarcastic smile.  Eyes roll.) 

Victoria:  Oh, no…he protected… 

Joy:  Ha, ha!  So, I suppose you aren’t a big fan of President Obama! 

Victoria:  Uh, …Tort Reform. 

Joy:  Because he is so charismatic, and well spoken and sexy… 

Victoria:  Tort Reform?! 

Joy:  And his wife’s arms!!  So you don’t like his Health Care Plan because you are a racist?! 

Victoria:  Tort Reform. 

Joy:  See?  You are.  You didn’t vote for him, did you?! 

Victoria: Um… huge tax increase, insured illegals, rationed and low quality health care, lack of doctors, tax funded abortions, collapse of the middle class, death of freedom,  Cap ‘n Trade/Tax – Bad, Marxist agenda… 

Joy: You don’t just play a ditz on TV!  You are a ditz!  We’ll be right back after this commercial. 

(Hair and Makeup come to the set and tidy up the middle aged faces.) 

Joy:  So, we’re back with Victoria who does not have a show, and I do!  So…why do you hate Obama?! 

Victoria:  Well, I don’t hate anyone, I’m just concerned about our country becoming… 

Joy:  He is such a good speaker! 

Victoria:  … Communist.  Van Jones was not an accident.  The safe schools’ czar, Kevin Jennings has a gay agenda for our innocent children.  Socialized medicine does not work… 

Joy:  (To camera) You see?  I can’t even have one conservative on my show until they start yelling, and cursing, and bitching!  What is it with you people?!  You are so full of HATE!  Remind me, never to have these stupid A–holes on my show again!  (To producer off stage)  Get me Janeane Garofalo!  She is a genius!  Jesus! 

Victoria:  How can you take Jesus’ name in vain if you are Catholic?

 Joy:  What?  Oi Vey!  I’m not even Jewish!  I’m gonna puke!  Take me to a commercial!  Save me! 

(Applause and fade to commercial)

1)  People jumping from burning buildings.
2)  Congress standing outside, humbly bowing their heads, and praying.
This was a shocking sight.
3)  The pews of my church completely full of people…and for several months after.

It’s human nature to remember God when we’re in big trouble.  Even agnostics offered up a prayer that day.  We needed super human help from a higher power to defeat the Enemy Without.

God answered our prayers, and along with the excellent leadership of Bush, Cheney, our fantastic military, and superb FBI and CIA, we have been safe for eight years.  Thank you. 

Now we need that Divine help to defeat the Enemy Within.

Strangely, our present White House and Capitol seem to be crawling with sneaky subversives who are intent on destroying capitalism, freedom and the American Way as we know it. They have lots of different labels and labels that keep changing.  They are like a cancer that slowly eats it’s way across the healthy host until it is fat enough to kill it.

When I was 12 years old,  I was warned of Communism and required to read “1984″ by George Orwell.  I hated the dark, sinister story of a free country that turned bad.  I wanted to think about The Carpenters, and Bread, and how to get my hair to look like Farrah Fawcett.  My high school was Christian, so we were aware of spiritual warfare, invisible enemies.  We were taught that the 2nd Amendment, the right to “bear arms” would prevent a military takeover. Instead, they said, the Communists would try to destroy us “from within” by encouraging sin in our youth.  Promiscuous Sex, Drugs, Rock ‘n Roll, and a disrespect for authority would render our citizens helpless and weak. (Rap and it’s profanity hadn’t been invented yet.)  This subtle, invisible, inward takeover was more powerful.  Apathy, lack of education, lack of a family unit…lack of God.

II Chronicles 7:14 says, “If my people who are called by my name will humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”  We had to memorize that Bible verse and I still know it by heart today.  I graduated in 1976, the Bicentennial of our country, so we were wearing red, white, and blue bell bottoms when we recited that verse at graduation.

Now, every day, minute by minute, I have been watching the prophetic fiction of “1984″ become reality.  My voice is irritating, but I’ve been squawking like a rooster, to my fellow Americans, “Wake Up!  Wake Up!”  I think it’s starting to work.

There is a painting of our first Congress humbly praying to God.

When I see Obama brag ”I have a gift,”  “I just wanna spread the wealth,” or ”The police acted stupidly” or  lie “My health plan will not add one dime to the deficit.  It will not fund abortions or insure illegals.”  When I see Pelosi sneer ”un-American, Astro-turf,” or ex-Czar Van Jones say, “Republicans are A–holes,” I replace those images with the image of our leaders humbly praying to God for help.  This is my dream.

Then, I roll out of bed, humbly get on my knees and pray.  “Help!”

“A rose by any other name is still a rose.”

Liz is driving me to the 9-12 Westwood Tea Party.  I’m biting my fake fingernails because I’m one of the speakers and I don’t have a speech yet.

Liz: Do you have your speech all ready?

Me: No…I’m kinda nervous.  I mean, where do I start? Should I talk about:

1)  Obama’s last speech where he lied 13 times? Not even little sneaky lies you have to research, but big, bold, blatant lies!  ”My plan will not fund abortions, or insure illegals!”  Lie, lie, lie.

2)  The former Liberally-Biased Mainstream Media that is now a completed, fully-functioning Progressive Propaganda Machine?  Ignoring the Acorn tapes, and the Van Jones story! That’s called the lie of omission!

3)  Or, …hey, you know what I read?  I was flipping around in the Bible and since it’s 9 -12 I just flipped to Psalm 12 and it said the most perfect thing…about lying in the government!

Liz: Really?  Did you see Glenn Beck today?

Me: The protest sign in the Washinton D.C. crowd that said Ephesians 6:12?

Liz: Yeah!

Me: I looked it up!  And, right while I was reading it, Glenn Beck said, kind of apologizing, “I don’t usually do this…ya know, read the Bible on the air…but..

Liz: I know!  He read it!

Me: He read the Bible on the air!

“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”

Ephesians 6:12
King James Version

Me: I wish I had a Bible.  I should read that Psalm 12 thing in my speech.

Liz: I think I have a Bible in the car…(she looks around and finds one in the glove compartment!)

Me: You do!

She has one!

I flip to Psalm 12 and read it out loud to her and my bored teenager in the back seat.

“Everyone talks in lie language;
Lies slide off their oily lips.
They doubletalk with forked tongues.

I’m tired of hearing, “We can talk anyone into anything!
Our lips manage the world.”

God, keep us safe from their lies,
From the wicked who stalk us with lies,
From the wicked who collect honors
For their wonderful lies.”

Psalm 12
The Message Version

Liz: You definitely have to read that!  It’s perfect!

We get to the Federal Building.  It is a beautiful California day.  Lots of American flags are flapping against the blue sky.  I do a couple handstands on the platform for my handstand photo collection.  I bump into my freedom fighting buddies.  We hug and admire each other’s signs.  I love the one where George Washington has the cartoon bubble over his head that says, “WTF?”

I have Liz’s Bible stuck in the waistband of my jeans because my hands are holding two protest signs.

I start thinking about whether or not to read the Bible in my speech.  Why am I afraid to?

This is not a Liberal crowd.  Liberals would not approve of Bibles being read in public.  They took them out of the schools and are trying to get “In God We Trust” and “One Nation Under God” taken off of our money, and out of the Pledge of Allegiance.  Speaking of The Pledge…What about that YouTube video?

–

If that doesn’t reek of Daniel 3:6 and Revelation 13:15 I don’t know what does!

Communists do not allow Bibles.  When I was a child, my Dad was writing a check to an organization that smuggled Bibles into Russia.   I said, “Why do they have to sneak Bibles?”  Dad said, “They’re Communist.”

Atheists do not like Bibles.

All decisions and most political issues all come down to whether you are FOR GOD or AGAINST GOD.

The reason Liberals-Communists-Atheists don’t like Bibles is because they do not want the competition.  “No man can serve two masters…” Matthew 6:24  You cannot worship God and the State.  You must choose one.

Very interesting that Obama has a new web site called serve.gov.  Or, Serve Government.
Reminds me of the Bob Dylan song, “You Gotta Serve Somebody/It might be the devil, and it might be the Lord/but you’re gonna have to serve somebody.”

As I stood in front of the sea of faces, flags, and signs, I opened my mouth and let my heart speak.  I saw myself digging the Bible out of my waistband and holding it up in the air.  I heard my mouth saying, “I always took my freedom for granted.  My freedom to worship.  This is the next thing Obama is going to try to take away from us.  Newly appointed Mark Lloyd and Cass Sunstein’s agenda is to stop conservative/Christian talk radio and TV and Internet….”

At the end of my speech I said, “Psalm 12 says…”  Right then, I was given the “Wrap It Up” sign.  I paused for a second. I mumbled something about hoping in God and not a man.  Then, I left the podium.

I did not read it out loud.  I don’t know why.

He says, “Public Option.  No one will have to change, if they like their present situation.”  LIE.
He says, “My plan will not add one dime to the deficit.”  LIE.
    (Congressional Budget Committee speak up!)
He says that if we don’t act now, the country will fall apart.  LIE.
He says that quality of health care won’t suffer.  LIE
He says that there won’t be rationing and those that say there will be are liars.  LIE.
He says that the Republicans have no solutions to offer up.  LIE
   (Several of them lift papers into the air.)
He says that this is not socialism.  LIE
He says this is the “moral” thing to do!  LIE
    (Take money from the middle class and give it to the non-taxpayers and illegals?!)
He says this won’t insure the illegals!  LIE…. 

And then, wait, I choke on my caffeine-free Diet Coke… Like a voice from above, I think I just heard someone shout out, just what I was thinking, ”LIE!”  

I can’t believe it!  Someone used the real word, not the politically correct word, “Disingenuous!”  Nancy Pelosi’s big, arrogant smile suddenly drops and she looks over to the Republican side of the room with the mean glare of a stern librarian!  This is fantastic theatre! 

Biden isn’t listening to a word of this speech.  He’s trying to decide whether to wear a serious face, or a happy face, or a concerned face, or a mad face.  So his expression results in a combination of all of the above.  

I’m new to politics.  Is it always like this?! 

It’s gotten so bad that I’ve divided my friends into two categories:

1)  Those who “Drank the Kool-Aid.”
2)  Those who “Get It.”

Or, the stupid and the smart.  I just can’t respect people who are buying this charade, this sham, this takeover.  I stare at them buggy eyed, with my mouth hanging open!  Are they blind?  Are they deaf?  It’s driving me crazy!  It doesn’t take a, well, a “bimbo” to realize what is happening! 

The President continues, “I don’t have all the specific details ironed out yet!”  Laughter!  People laugh out loud!  The President finally told the truth!!!  

Then, he continues with his lies.  FREE STUFF FOR EVERYONE!!  YAY!!  I’M THE MAGIC MAN!!! 

I think of those Funnel Cakes I saw at the L.A. County Fair the other day.  What is a Funnel Cake?  I think it’s a deeply fried and refried glob of dough that’s covered with sugar and syrup and whipped cream.  The President should say, “Free Funnel Cakes for everyone and there are NO CALORIES!!” 

I turn the TV off, shut my eyes, and start to pray for the blind and deaf people in our country. 

My friend calls me.  She is a Hollywood director, not a conservative, not into politics.  She whispers into the phone, “Hey Vic, what can I do to help the cause?  This guy is making me feel scuzzy.  He’s lying.”  I flip her over from the “Kool-Aid” side to the “Get-It” side. 

P.S.  Joe Wilson is my hero.

The people auditioning me will all be liberals.  Should I hide my recent, passionate Tea-Bagging activities, if the topic comes up?  Why should they hate me?  I only want the best for everyone.  My beliefs in the Bible, and freedom and capitalism are only ideals that bless people.  And, they worked real good from 1776 to 2008…with a hitch in the 60s where immorality, free love, the pill, drugs, divorce, and the breakup of the family started the thread of morality unraveling.  You can’t have a great country without the spirit of The Ten Commandments hovering in the hearts of its citizens.  

This execution squad has probably already labeled me.  But, the labels, they are a’changing.  Republicans have moved left.  Liberals have moved left.  I guess it’s The Second Law of Thermodynamics, “the world is in a state of entropy,” or decay, or left-moving.  Now the word “radical” is in the mix.  It’s a swirl of words that represent belief systems, or “world-views” as Chuck Colson put it in his book, “How Now Shall We Live?”  

One must watch the news all day to keep up with the swiftly changing currents.  Dennis Prager had the author of “Heaven and Earth” on his radio show today, and I sighed with relief.  Finally, someone is addressing the global warming hoax with a real scientist.  But, suddenly KGIL has canceled all of it’s conservative talk radio programs and replaced them with music.  The hairs on my arms pop up.  Has the Fairness Doctrine begun?  And we didn’t even get to fight it?  

I saw a real fat girl once, slowly walking down the middle of an empty street in a “poor” neighborhood.  She was eating from a bag of Cheetos.  I was in my car at a stop light, watching her.  I thought maybe no one told her that Cheetos make you fat, or maybe her life is so sad that that bag of Cheetos is the highlight of her day.  Sometimes, Cheetos is the highlight of my day.  I said a little prayer for her.  Then, she dropped the empty bag in the middle of the street. 

My empathy dissipated. 

Statistics confirm the fact that most “poor” people have no fathers.  My father told me that Cheetos makes you fat.  He also built a gym in our backyard.  We lived in a very “poor” neighborhood.  Our house cost $10,000 when he bought it in the 50’s.  The neighborhood then got worse.  All of our neighbors’ houses began to look dirty and have five broken cars and beer cans in their front yards.  Our house was always immaculate and our front yard always had freshly mown grass.  My father took us to church 3 times a week.  He read the Bible out loud to Grandma and Grandpa every Sunday night, at Grandma’s house, because Grandpa was an agnostic and wouldn’t go to church.  My father taught me how to read when I was 5, so that when I started first grade I was the best reader.  I skipped second grade. My father played the piano every night and taught us show tunes, and how to harmonize.  My father taught us how to water ski.  My father was a gymnastics coach, so he taught me a “flip flop” and I was the only cheerleader who could do that.  My father protected us. He bought a bee bee gun that looked like a real gun, to scare burglars away.  We were robbed four times.  He said, “I could never kill anyone.”  My father made us feel safe.  He gave us confidence and a history and a future. 

That Cheetos girl probably doesn’t have a father.  And, no amount of government assistance, housing, food stamps, free college, or ObamaCare can give her that.  She needs a father. 

Obama didn’t have a father.  Maybe that’s why he sees the government as Daddy.  

My auditioning/execution squad enters the room and all my thoughts start to swirl away.  The only thought that remains is that I must tell the truth.  I only want the best for everyone.

I’m sitting in the parking lot, a poster board and black Sharpie in hand, the radio on Frank Pastori,  99.5 FM.  He’s passionately discussing the very current, very urgent Obamacare catastrophe with callers.  I am creating my protest poster, trying to zero in on the exact name of this, his latest attempt at World Domination…Nationalized-Universal-Single-Payer-Socialized-Government-Controlled-Health-Care-Insurance-Reform-Thing.  I settle on “Obamacare.”  I call in to the radio show.  My voice is higher than usual and a bit shaky.  It takes a lot of energy to protest.  All my endorphins are zinging.  “Hi Frank…I’m here at the…”

I have a flashback to SNL…adrenaline rushing through my veins, and Steven Tyler just down the hall.  My Madonna poster on the wall…I looked at her attitude for inspiration. I told her that once and she said, “…Really?”   On a scale of 1 to 10, her exhibitionism is a 150 and mine is a 5. I would have never predicted that in 17 years, I would be sitting in a Honda Civic, head full of super-boring health care facts, watching old people walk by, while squeaking this out on a poster,

“What’s the Rush?” (afraid we’ll read the bill?).

Then, on the other side:

“We Read It & We Say NO OBAMACARE.”

(Then I scribble a little “fishy” on one side referring to the new White House Snitching Program, and I scribble a little “John 16:33” on the other side.  Ya gotta have hope.)

What you write on your protest poster is important.  It’s like wearing your heart on your sleeve.

As I walk into the gathering crowd, I notice that all the signs are polite, intelligent. No swastikas! Well, there was one poster of Obama with a Hitler mustache that was quickly taken down, but that poster seems appropriate since the two have so many similar qualities; the most recent being Obama purposefully stirring up racial conflict with the Gates-Crowley affair. Hitler did that…stirred up racial conflict. Obama’s current attitude toward Israel is in question. Hitler did not support Jews. Obama is forming a volunteer/mandatory Youth Army.  Hitler did that. Obama is trying to have government control everything, the media, cars, banks, houses, health. Hitler did that. Obama appointed 44 people (czars) that we didn’t get to vote for. Hitler did that. Obama started a Snitch Program. Hitler did that. Obama wants the government to control who dies and when they die. Hitler did that. So did Stalin, Lenin and Castro.

This whole thing isn’t about health care – it’s about CONTROL.

When I left the house, Obama was on TV strutting and laughing, “Ha, ha, ha.  There is no death panel. This will not cost more. There will be no lines.” I looked at the TV and said out loud, “How stupid do you think we are?”

A big black man approaches me and hands me a booklet with a picture of Hitler and Obama on the front.  I ask him, “Are you on our side or their side?”  He walks away.  Later I realize it’s from the political cult, the LaRouche organization.

I walk over to the conservative area.  My friend Kathy is wearing a surgical mask with “Free Speech” written on it. She hands me one that says, “Fishy.”  The conservatives smile, laugh, hug and admire each other’s homemade signs and original, clever sayings. We take pictures of each other with our signs. We are shy.  This is a new thing.  Conservatives never protest.  We converse and then shake our heads in concern and look at the grass.  We are “well dressed.”  Many of us carry American flags.  After chanting, ”Freedom Yes!, Obamacare No!,” we start singing, “God Bless America,” and “My Country ‘Tis of Thee…sweet land of liberty…”

The liberals are carrying three signs that have been mass-produced and handed out.  Craigslist had an ad offering $15 an hour to people who would hold ObamaCare signs. (Maybe they get a bonus if they look like they mean it.)  One of their mass-produced signs says, “Thank You Obama.”  The others say “Reform Now,” and “Standing Together: Health.”  Most of the fake protesters are lifeless, or sitting in the grass bored out of their minds. They don’t smile. Not one of them holds a flag. None sing.

A middle aged business man with no sign approaches me and I smile.  He looks at my sign with disgust and says, “You want that forever?”  I’m confused but quickly realize he’s an Obamunist.

“I..uh…what?

He says, “You don’t want change?”

I say, “I don’t want communism!”  He quickly walks away before we can have a conversation.

That was weird.

We conservatives keep singing. Now we are singing, “You’re a Grand Old Flag.” Then we chant the Pledge of Allegiance. The O’ers continue to slump, lifeless.  A few standing O’ers try to start a conversation, their protest posters facing our protest posters.  One of them talks to me, “Millions of people have no health insurance.”

How do you respond to that? I want to say, “Um…maybe they don’t work, or they spent their paycheck on booze instead! Or, maybe they don’t plan ahead. Or, are they illegal aliens? Are we, the middle class supposed to financially support the whole world who moves here?” But, I say, “Socialism is bad.”

A movie-star lookin’ guy wearing sunglasses has a poster that says,”Karl Marx Loves Obamacare.” I ask him,”What’s the difference between Marxism and Communism?” He says, “Communism happens suddenly and violently to a country. Marxism is more of a creeping thing that slowly leads to Communism.”

A 60 year old woman with no sign, no flag, and wearing no bra, walks up to me and says, ”My insurance is $2000 a month.”

While I’m trying to process that, mine is $100 a month, she says, “I’m dying of cancer and I have no insurance and I don’t know what to do.”  She looks healthy.

While my brain is figuring out that she has just lied to me, she walks away.

I say, “Why don’t you go where the illegal aliens go.  They get free health care.”

She glances back, the devil in her eye.

Creepy.

This whole protest thing is too much for me. It feels icky. And then, an attractive young couple approaches, “Are you her?  You are so brave. Thank you.  I’ll pray for you.” The bond of strangers in ‘a time such as this’ is rich and deep and unforgettable. I think of the movie “Reds” but the opposite.

The meeting begins, and with 1000+ people attending, there isn’t a microphone FOR THE PEOPLE. Schiff and a panel of liberals only answer one question from the hundreds of cards we filled out. There is not a balanced discussion where opposing viewpoints are represented. It reeks of  ’propaganda.’ People start leaving in frustration because questions about the 1017 page, intentionally confusing bill are not being answered. No one answered my question, “Why the rush?”

So I answer it myself.  Either a) The liberals fear they will be replaced in the mid term elections and Obama’s power will wither. Or, b) The Obamunists are trying to pass it before anyone can read it, like they did before with the Spendulus Bill…but us citizens are on to them now, and we read it.

When I walk to my car with my poster, flag and camera, traffic is at a stand still around the block. An old woman leans out of her car window and shouts to me, “You’re stupid.”

My head swings to the right, ”I read the bill. It’s terrible.”

She screams, “No you didn’t or you wouldn’t be…that.”

I shout back, sturdy and strong, “Did you read it?”  I’m not afraid anymore.

“…be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.”   John 16:33

5 pm.  Sepulveda and Santa Monica, Feinstein’s Office  August 14, 2009

I attend the Westside Protest at Feinstein’s office. The conservatives are outnumbered. We stand on the street corner and passing cars honk loudly. I turn to the Obamunist next to me, “Why do you want socialized medicine?”

He arrogantly replies, “I lived in Germany.  It worked there.”

I say, “Then why aren’t you there?”

He’s tall and proud. ”I want to be here.”

A few minutes later, I say, “What do you do?”

He says, “I’m a professor.”

I say knowingly, “Oh, no wonder. You know Harvard used to be Christian. So were all the other Ivy League schools. So was our country.”

He says, “Jefferson wasn’t a Christian.”

I say, “I know.  He was a Deist. He didn’t believe Jesus was God, but he loved the Bible and thought our country should be based on Jesus’ teachings.”

I say, “What do you teach?”

“History.”

I laugh, “Oh! Didn’t you learn from history that communism/socialism doesn’t work??!!”

He’s silent.

I say, “What about the death panel/euthanasia clause? (Dr. Ezekiel Emanuel, Obama’s health advisor)”

He says, “That’s a lie. Did you read the bill?”

I say, “Yes.  And, they will have to ration care…it’s inevitable.”

My friend walks by and says, “Hey Vicki, did you hear, Obama deleted the death panel clause today?!”

I smugly look at my German-loving Obamunist professor and say, “How could they delete it, if it never existed?!”

He walked away.

And, the war goes on.

As I share the shocking information that our Freedom of Speech is being attacked, the radio host across from me, his face, it looks like he just ate a lemon. It’s all scrunched up like…he hates me. He abruptly cuts me off and ends my interview. I’m stupefied at the reaction of people who “just can’t handle the truth.” My driver Shelley is a liberal. She doesn’t say anything. As we get in the car I try to apologize, “Well, he asked me why I was a new political activist.  I guess I should just tell jokes.” I mean I have been hired basically to sell tickets to a bar where people will spend lots of money on alcohol. And, I do need to make some money. My husband is a cop.

And don’t get me started on the Obama Gates Crowley Beer Summit. I wrote 15 articles about racism and tore them up. My husband kept chiding me, “White people can’t discuss race.”

But, I must say. Sgt. Crowley is a first class act. A shout out to you, Sgt.  I love cops, as you can see by the above photo.

Anyway, my next stop is the rock station. It’s ironic for me to be there since I have never owned a stereo or a rock n’ roll record and went to a Baptist high school where in the late 70’s we were actually told to burn/break our rock records–I didn’t have any to burn/break.  I am telling my Kurt Cobain story about how I hooked up Weird Al with Kurt so he could get permission to write the parody “Smells Like Teen Sweat,” when I am pleasantly surprised by a cell phone call from Jessica Hahn.  Yes, the Jessica Hahn. What great radio, right?  I ask her if she’ll be in my “on-air” interview and she agrees. She understands “the business.” Jessica and I have recently struck up a friendship finding we live in the same LA area.  I had met her briefly fifteen years ago on the set of “Unhappily Ever After.”  I had apologized for parody-ing her with my “I Am Not a Bimbo” song on SNL. She was gracious and sweet. We share a background in the church and we both still study the Bible! Anyway, I knock out the rock station interview thanks to Jessica Hahn and go back to my hotel.

I scour the internet and find that the conservative big shots are now fully engaged in this battle against our government.  I send in two emails to flag@whitehouse.gov. I figure I’m already on their “list.” One of my emails says, “Is this a joke?”  One says, “How dare you attack our Freedom of Speech!  Stop the Snitch Program!  It’s illegal!” So, you see, I’m really, really on their “list.”   I’m wondering what will happen to the people on “the list.”  Audit? Jail? Death?  I’m starting to feel exactly the same as the Soviets and the Cubans.  I now understand perfectly why they risked their lives heading to Miami on rafts. The fear is palpable.  The invisible oppression of being watched.  The White House is trying to intimidate my fellow Americans from speaking out, from asking questions about this Socialized Medicine.  Nancy Pelosi is on TV saying we wear swastikas! What planet is she from?  It’s all a jumble of anger and fear and lies. My country.

My hope rises as I read Cornyn and Sekulow’s letters to the President.  They know the legal lingo.  They are representing me. Whew. And of course, there is God.  And, I pray.

My next radio interview is a “phoner.”  I gaze out the window at the beautiful Denver mountains as I sink luxuriously into this interview with a fellow conservative.  He gets it.  He is surprised that I am in the fight along with him, to save our country. My next few interviews are frivolous.  I try to accentuate the ditz in me, to sell tickets, to make Wende, the club owner like me and have me back.

Onstage, I try out a new song, “White Men,” dedicated to Sonja Sotomayer.  One audience loves it.  One is completely silent.  I decide to skip the song for the rest of the shows.  After the show, one lady comes up to me and grasps my hand in both of hers.  She whispers, “Thank you so much for speaking up, about our country.”  Her eyes look deep into mine. I feel like we have both scratched the fish symbol into the sand, during the Roman Empire times. The fall of the Roman Empire.

At my Bible study group this week I was sitting between Mavis and her Chihuahua named Pedro, and Sonia, an Iranian who lived five years in Russia, where she waited to receive her legal U.S. citizenship.  I asked Pastor Joel “Why does the Bible say Jesus was from the lineage of King David, if he had no blood from his father in him, since he was born of a virgin?  Pastor Joel excitedly replied, “Oh, well turn to Matthew 1 and Luke 3!  Mary and Joseph were both descendants of David as you can see by these genealogies.  So, the Old Testament prophecy was fulfilled that said the Messiah would be from the priestly (through Nathan) and kingly (through Solomon) lineage of David.  The blood of Mary which was from David ran through Jesus.  Oh. I always wondered about that.  

As we were leaving, Sonia and I started talking about the 48 pages of “Hate Speech” I received on The Huffington Post after my last Big Hollywood article.  Sonia said, “When people can’t defend their position on an issue, they attack you personally.”  

“Yeah,” I said.  “I would love someone to talk me into being a liberal.  But they can’t give me one good reason.  Take socialized medicine for instance, the ‘Health Care Reform’ that the President is trying to shove through the Senate as quickly as possible. They can’t give me one good reason I should want it.   I mean, they say it will be cheaper, but that’s not true, because our taxes will go up to pay for it.”  

Sonia told me that when she lived in Communist Russia, her friend had appendicitis and was sent to the hospital.  She told Sonia that cockroaches crawled over her chest at night.  Sonia then went on to explain that with socialized medicine, desperate patients resort to an “underground” system.  Deals are made “under the table.”  Deals involving your life!  She compared it to the police force there.  She said that when you are pulled over for speeding, the police expect you to slip them a folded up bill under your driver’s license.  Sonia said, “Did you hear the story about the professor and the classroom?  It explains communism so well.  The professor told the class that after every test,  all the students’ grades would be averaged and all would receive the same grade.  So, after the first test, the A students who studied all night and the F students who partied all night, all received a C.  As the semester went on, the A students quit studying, and all received an F.” 

With no competition, humans reach the lowest common denominator.  If capitalism dies, and there is no competition for patients let’s say, doctors will all study and work as little and as poorly as possible…as will hospital maintenance workers. Thus, the cockroaches. 

I walked to my car in the parking lot humming the theme from Camelot.  At least I got to live at the tail end of a magical place called America.  I’m an eyewitness who can tell my grandchildren about a faraway land of freedom where the people who worked the hardest were rewarded.  And everyone tried to out perform each other and so, everything was top quality.  Houses and cars and pools and food.  They were all the biggest and best in the world.  And people respected God and humbly thanked Him for their blessings.  But gradually, the people started taking their blessings for granted.  They started to expect rewards without working for them. They felt entitled.  Even the strangers who moved into the land felt entitled. No one thanked God.  They even started to mock Him.  Bible studies started to be referred to as “Hate Speech” gatherings…Leviticus 26 was a crumpled, yellowed page blowing in the wind… 

I put my dog-eared Bible in the back seat of my car and stared at it.  Someday soon we both might be “underground.” 

My friend Liz called me today, “I think there needs to be a call-to-action rather than just resolving that this is our fate.  Obama, who shouldn’t be President in the first place, is systematically destroying this country.  It used to be called TREASON.  He’s NOT upholding the constitution — that’s treasonous!  And we’re just watching as though it’s all right!”  

“Okay,” I sighed, ”I’ll stay in the fight.”