Rodney Lee is some slob living in Sherman Oaks. He sits around pissing and moaning all day, but now has an outlet. Thanks Breitbart, you're okay.
Want to know more about Rodney Lee Conover? I doubt it, but here you go: www.bachelorman.com
Rodney Lee Conover
The Oscars are Important
by Rodney Lee Conover
While watching the Academy Awards last night, I got to thinking about what an important role the Oscars play in our global community. And of course, there’s no more blatant case in point of Hollywood’s positive impact on society than Al Gore’s 2007 Oscar win for his documentary, “An Inconvenient Truth.” What a speech too, huh? Just listen: “My fellow Americans, people all over the world, we need to solve the climate crisis. It’s not a political issue; it’s a moral issue…”
And solve it he did! Just look at what’s happened since that magical evening: (more…)
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Mickey Rourke
by Rodney Lee ConoverHe needs a Shamwow for that hair
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please please no
by Rodney Lee ConoverPlease, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway; Please, not Anne Hathaway;
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Heath Ledger’s family
by Rodney Lee Conoverlittle late with the intervention, don’t you think folks?
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Curious Case
by Rodney Lee ConoverMeryl Streep is definitely aging forward
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Technical award II
by Rodney Lee ConoverSarah Jessica Parker just won Best in Show.
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Jack was bored?
by Rodney Lee ConoverHe was standing next to Jennifer Anniston. Had his hand on her back. He wasn’t bored, he was in teststeronical shock. What a babe. She should date me. I could make her happy.
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Bollywood
by Rodney Lee ConoverThe tune-in for the Oscars telecast in India is so huge that if you call to book a flight tonight, an American answers the phone.
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technical award
by Rodney Lee ConoverMarissa Tomei’s bra just won for Best Supporting
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Anne Hathaway
by Rodney Lee ConoverHer eyes are following me around the room again. But seriously, do people REALLY think she’s good looking? I simply do not get it. She’s a bag of antlers. When are we going to stop this skinny/skank look? Take a close look and ask yourself if you’d believe it if she came out as a transvestite? Maybe I’m just still pissed that she dared to get into Barbara Feldon’s pumps.
Kate Winslett rules. Mmm…
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Akmed’s Heroes
by Rodney Lee ConoverSo I’m having lunch with my buddy Sandy Frank, and we’re laughing about his idea to update ‘Hogan’s Heroes,’ but have the series set in Guantanamo Bay Prison. You know, a guy pulls back his prayer rug, revealing a tunnel that goes to Raul Castro’s rape room; the fat lovable guard who “knows nada!” and of course the foreign guy who kisses everybody… wait – I fused the wrong Richard Dawson in there for a second…
… Anywhoozer, I’m thinking later how crazy it was that they even got Hogan’s Heroes on the air, but at least the fascists were the bad guys and the Americans were the good guys. CUT TO: Any given night this week, no less than three contemporary movies are running on cable where the fascists are the good guys and the Americans are the bad guys… wow, talk about crazy. (more…)
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The Obama Hollywood Fallout
by Rodney Lee ConoverGood news for anyone connected to President Obama: Hollywood may soon be calling.
That’s right, not just the rich, famous or politically connected; but your average, everyday working person with some sort of connection to the newly installed First Family could very well be on their way to big-time celebrity.
Because according to The Hollywood Reporter, a company called, ‘44 Blue Productions’ is pitching a reality show to cable networks, starring one Johnny Wright — who has been Michelle Obama’s hairstylist for the past year. I figure this is good news for lots of folks. (more…)
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Tomorrow’s Inauguration and Comedians
by Rodney Lee ConoverTalk show writers and hosts, including “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” and “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart,” have been lamenting how they would love to bust President-elect Barack Obama’s chops more, but he just doesn’t do anything to make fun of. No matter what he says at the coronation tomorrow, there’s no material here… move along.
Let’s be honest.
#1: They love Barack Obama.
#2: He’s African-American.
That’s the bottom line and everybody knows it. The facts are, Barack Obama is a gaffe machine and has done more flip-flopping in the last two months than Jimmy Buffet in Grand Cayman. But do you think for a minute David Letterman would do a “Great Moments in Presidential Speeches,” with Obama saying; “I’ve already visited 57 states”…? (more…)
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Dead, Divorced, Married, Pregnant, Or In Jail
by Rodney Lee ConoverI saw “Gran Torino” finally and it put me in a mood. I see where Paris Hilton says she’s only slept with “a couple of people;” but I’m guessing it’s because the rest of them told her to leave right after.
My only 2009 resolution is to lose weight, so I ordered the paperback version of “The Best Life Diet,” which is by Oprah Winfrey’s trainer Bob Greene. The bad news is the shipping weight was somewhere between 140 and 320 pounds. (more…)
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Obama Tax Cut Plan Is Genius
by Rodney Lee ConoverRemember the first time Barack Obama went on TV and said he was going to cut taxes for 95% of all Americans and we all kind of snickered – even Democrats? I thought to myself, ‘boy, he’s done now — nobody’s that stupid.’ Then 52% Americans went out and proved how much I know, right?
Stay with me on this: On one of the TV shows the other night, the guy on the left repeats the claim that Obama is going to cut taxes for 95% of all Americans, and the conservative guest says, (the obvious); “That’s ridiculous – 40% of Americans don’t even pay taxes, so if Obama sends them a check, that’s not a tax cut – that’s welfare!”
The guy on the left says; “It’s not welfare. They may not pay federal income tax, but they pay sales tax, local taxes, gas tax, and property taxes. You didn’t complain when George W. Bush cut taxes for the rich, but now you don’t want Obama to cut taxes for everyone else?” Silence. Everybody on the show stammered and rolled their eyes; but for a minute there, they were kind of stifled by that one. They were staring like they had seen an alien. And it wasn’t just Colmes’ hair this time.
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Anne Hathaway Demands Explanation For Rick Warren
by Rodney Lee ConoverI’m not one of these guys that say actors, celebrities, talented musicians or The Dixie Chicks should shut up and not chime in on political issues. Trust me, when I become rich and famous this fall, I’m gonna be screaming like Chuck Noland making fire about everything political. So I think it’s great Anne Hathaway’s speaking out. By the way, is it me, or do her eyes follow you around the room when you walk by?
Now imagine Obama’s schedule when he finally becomes president: He’s gotta talk to Hamas, he’s gotta talk to that dude in Iran, he’s got the bench press challenge with Putin…Don’t you love saying that guy’s name? They should hire Ed McMahon to announce him whenever he enters the parliament building: “HEEEEEEERE’S PUTIN!” (And Ed could use the rubles too – it’s a win-win).
Anywhoozer, before any of that happens, Barack Obama MUST have a sit down with Anne Hathaway and, as she said in Palm Springs recently; “Explain that choice of Rick Warren!” That is bold, Ms. Hathaway – but it doesn’t surprise me because this is the same person who dared to fill the pumps of the great Barbara Feldon. Wow! Now there’s a woman! Do I love Barbara Feldon, or what?
I pick up a paper once in a while and I’m reading all the time about the trouble in the Middle East - and I have the solution: Barbara Feldon. That’s right, if we send 99 over there and get her in between everybody those hostilities will stop faster than payment on a Raffaello Follieri personal check.
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Opie Taylor — Go To Your Room
by Rodney Lee ConoverWhen I was a kid, I was watching TV with my father after he got home from work one night and he boldly proclaimed, “You watch, Nixon is gonna quit.” And sure enough, he did. I was amazed. My dad actually predicted our president was going to resign!
It wasn’t until many years later that I found out just about everyone knew that was going to happen, but still, I was pretty impressed. I still am. My dad had two jobs, a third on the weekends and managed to make every wrestling match or swim meet me or my sisters were ever in. Honestly – I don’t know how he did it – I just went to the Starbucks and I’m exhausted.
But anywhoozer, that was then, back about the time I started watching, “The Andy Griffith Show.” A thoughtful, incredibly written program the entire family watched and still can. It holds up today as anyone knows who sits around watching TV all morning after they go to the Starbucks. It’s sweet, it has social commentary, tons of laughs, a chick named “Crump,” – come on, what’s not to love?
It also featured young Ronnie Howard, no older than myself at the time. Remember the one where the older kid was stealing Opie’s milk money and Andy had to teach him how to confront a bully? I cried. I’m not kidding. Ronnie Howard made me cry. Every time I see it.
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