Matt Patterson is a National Review Institute Washington Fellow and the author of Union of Hearts: The Abraham Lincoln & Ann Rutledge Story. His email is mpatterson.column@gmail.com.
Matt Patterson
Obama: The Woody Boyd Candidate
by Matt PattersonEarlier this year, I rented and re-watched the entire series run of Cheers. Towards the end of the series, the hayseed junior bartender Woody Boyd (Woody Harrelson) decides to run for city council. He is encouraged in this endeavor by psychiatrist Fraser Crane (Kelsey Grammer), the bar’s resident elite, who acts as Woody’s campaign manager.
Fraser masterminds Woody’s campaign as a social experiment: He is convinced that anyone, even a bumpkin, can get elected, simply by spouting vague cliches. His advice to Woody? Don’t be specific on the campaign trail – just repeat empty slogans like “change.”
When I saw this, I burst out laughing – perhaps this is where Axelrod & Co. received their inspiration for Barack Obama’s 2008 campaign theme, I surmised. (more…)
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Oh, The Horror!
by Matt PattersonWhat is horror?
The word comes down to us from the Old Roman, horrere, which means literally “to stand on end” (as in hair) or “to shiver,” whether from fear or cold – Ovid refers to the “chill-bearing breath” of the North Wind (Metamorphosis, I.65).
Halloween is a unique holiday, marked for the celebration of the chill bearing, when demons and witches are allowed to come out to play and scare the bejezzus out of us – or at least, that’s how it used to be.
Over the last decade or so, Halloween has become less about creep and more about camp; Dracula and Frankenstein costumes replaced by Octomom and Obama masks (OK, those are more scary). What I want to do here is help those who would like go old school this year, and have a truly frightful All Hallows’ Eve.
(First suggestion – avoid bars. Like St. Patrick’s Day and New Year’s, Halloween brings out the amateur drinkers, a more loathsome species than any undead thing you may encounter. No, Halloween is best spent alone with someone special to snack on in the dark, with something scary to read, listen to, or watch.) (more…)
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‘It Might Get Loud’: The Redemption of Jimmy Page
by Matt PattersonWhat happens to an artist whose creative peak has long past? That is the question which looms like a sustained E chord over the new documentary It Might Get Loud, a strange and wonderful cinematic ode to the electric guitar by director Davis Guggenheim. whose previous credits include An Inconvenient Truth (don’t hold that against him).
It Might Get Loud’s central conceit is simple and elegant in principle, but surprisingly messy and complex on screen: Take three eminent guitarists of differing styles and generations, interview them individually, get them to open up about their relationship with their instrument and then, for the film’s climax, throw them together on a sound-stage surrounded by guitars and see what happens.
Guggenheim’s choice of guitarists is a surprising one that somehow makes sense; Jack White of The White Stripes and The Raconteurs (in his 30’s), The Edge of U2 (in his 40’s), and Jimmy Page of The Yardbirds and Led Zeppelin (in his 60’s). (more…)
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Review: U2 360° — Great Music, Bi-Partisan Politics
by Matt PattersonOK, first things first: U2 put on a great show in FedEx Field in Washington D.C. on Tuesday, September 29, 2009.
This was a relief, because the previous Saturday they had turned in a dismal, oddly disjointed performance on “Saturday Night Live.” But three days later the boys were back in fighting shape; it was, in fact, one of the hardest rocking shows I’ve ever seen them give — and I have seen my share of U2 shows (my lifetime total is now somewhere in the double digits).
The show opened with several numbers from the woefully under-appreciated new album No Line On The Horizon; the thrilling and unique “Breathe,” segued into “Magnificent,” a tune which doesn’t quite soar as as high as it wants to, but comes closer live than on record. The lackluster “Get On Your Boots” was followed by Zoo-era favorite “Mysterious Ways,” bringing the stadium down and prompting Bono to remark, “Well, it’s a warm night after all!” He then gave a preview of the rest of the set: “We have old songs; we have new songs; we have songs we can barely play!” (more…)
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The Vault: An Exploration of the Gothic
by Matt PattersonPart 2 – In The Beginning
1965. Cafe Bizarre. Greenwich Village, New York City.
An unknown band takes the stage and begins to play. The electric viola weeps an unearthly, hypnotic lament, as the singer chants: “Not a ghost-bloodied country, all covered with sleep, where the black angel did weep…’”
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Perhaps The Black Angel’s Death Song was just a little too bizarre for Cafe Bizarre. Perhaps the song’s rumored anti-communist message did no go down well in deep-red lower Manhattan. For whatever reason, The Velvet Underground are promptly fired from their first regular gig for playing the strange and dissonant tune they had been warned not to play.
But the Velvets had secured their future nonetheless: Andy Warhol was at Cafe Bizarre that night. He described the audience as “dazed and damaged” after the performance – Warhol loved it. He took them into his fold and became their manager, producer and sponsor. He helped them secure their first record contract; he painted the cover for the first album, The Velvet Underground & Nico. (more…)
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‘Shark Week’ Has Seized Me In Its Gaping Maw
by Matt PattersonAh, August.
Hot. Muggy. Sluggish. School approaches; summer vacations are over or nearly so. The new television season is weeks away. And even in a good movie year – which 2009 has decidedly not been – all the best blockbusters have come and gone by now.
What to do? You could watch that stupid cat video on YouTube for the 1,000th time, or…you could watch a surfer get a major bite down from a giant man-eating fish. Sweet!
Yes friends, The Discovery Channel has the answer for our late-summer, entertainment withdrawal doldrums. For twenty-two years now, Discovery has devoted an entire week of August or July programming to real life sea monsters: They called it Shark Week, and lo, it was good.
Shark Week is always fun, but this year’s installment has been especially tasty. ”Blood In The Water” kicked it off, a terrific two-hour documentary about the real-life happenings that inspired Peter Benchley’s Jaws – the 1916 New Jersey shark massacre. (more…)
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The Vault: An Exploration of the Gothic
by Matt PattersonPart 1 – Introduction
The bats have left the bell tower, the victims have been bled… - Bauhaus, “Bela Lugosi’s Dead”
Goth is dead.
Well, OK, maybe not. But if it is not dead, exactly, Goth certainly isn’t what it once was. In this, Goth is rather like conservatism – with which it shares much (more on that later) – a glorious 1980’s heyday, followed by a confused 1990’s…and a disastrous 2000’s.
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True, some elements of Goth limp along in the new millennium, having been cannibalized by, and absorbed into, mainstream culture. In some instances, co-opted bits of Goth have been so deracinated as to seem entirely anomalous – witness the black hair, black eyeliner, and black nail polish of the latest American Idol runner up; like claws on a cow, once dangerous and distinct trappings draped on an entirely neutered and non threatening pop singer. (more…)
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‘The Dark Knight’: Year One
by Matt PattersonWhat is the difference between art and entertainment?
There is, obviously, some overlap: Not all art entertains (though some does); not all entertainment is art (though some is). At bottom, it seems, the difference is one of intent – the artist seeks to connect us with larger meanings, larger truths about the world, about ourselves. The primary focus of art is therefore to illuminate, with any entertainment had in the process merely a bonus.
The goal of the entertainer, on the other hand, is perhaps less sublime, though no less worthy – to distract, to tickle, to stimulate the fancy. Entertainment is at bottom diversion, and I say this without a trace of disdain – often it is the quality and quantity of our diversions which makes the difference between a joyful life and a merely bearable one.
One year ago this weekend, a beating black heart pulsed in summer’s midst: The Dark Knight. It was big-budget, comic book based franchise movie, made for popcorn eaters seeking suitable summer diversion. And It delivered beyond the filmmakers wildest expectations – the masses were so entertained that they lifted it up into the box office stratosphere in grateful recompense. (more…)
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Moonwalker: The Difference Between Achievement and Artifice
by Matt Patterson
This month marks the 40th anniversary of Apollo 11 and Neil Armstrong’s giant leap for mankind.
Mr. Armstrong is still alive, and, as far as I know, in good health. But alas, one day, like all of us, Armstrong will shuffle off this mortal coil. When he does, his passing will no doubt be news – it will lead on all of the broadcast and cable news programs, and decorate the front pages of the daily papers. He might even for a brief moment replace The Chosen One’s smiling visage on the covers of the etiolated news weeklies which grow thinner in size and substance with each passing week.
But will millions tune in to watch the funeral proceedings from across the globe? Will thousands descend into the streets in tears, inconsolable at the loss? Will there be a sports arena filled with famous and non famous mourners, gathered to celebrate his life? Will models and preachers and sports stars proclaim his heroism? (more…)
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Album Review: Chickenfoot
by Matt PattersonJoe Satriani lives.
On the self-titled debut album Chickenfoot, Satch sounds better and looser than he has in years – it’s easily his best work since 1993’s Time Machine. With his bald pate, shades encased face, and the sleek and shiny Ibanez hovering effortless in his hands, Satriani has morphed into the spitting image of the Marvel Comics character who graced the cover of 1987’s Surfing with the Alien. Unlike the Silver Surfer, however (always a rather glum chap in the comics) Satriani seems to be having a blast.
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And why not? He’s in a great band who’ve just made a great record, a rollicking stomp of riff and chorus. To the surprise of many, instrumental virtuoso Satriani flourishes as co-writer and supporting player, keeping his trademark pyrotechnics on slow burn, never overpowering vocalist Sammy Hagar during the verses, and all while adding perfect surface sheen to the tight grooves laid down by bassist Michael Anthony (formerly of Van Halen) and drummer Chad Smith (Red Hot Chili Peppers). When it’s time for him to solo, however, Satch lets the fire loose in some surprising ways – check out the Faith No More like mid-section of the otherwise classic stadium fare “Oh Yeah.” (more…)
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A Conservative Journey Through Literary America – Part 8: The Way Forward
by Matt PattersonThis series of essays was not intended to be a laundry list of conservative literary authors – laundry lists are always boring and never helpful. Instead, they were intended to be an investigation only, examining the dearth of conservatives in literature with an eye toward discovering the reason for this curious state of affairs and formulating a course for its possible correction.
As to the first, we have reached a tentative answer: A combination of temperament and values in the conservative mind combine to make the writing life both less suitable for, and less attractive to, conservatives. The question remains: What is to be done?
Let us state the obvious first – conservatives who are so inclined must write, write often, and write well. But that is not enough. They must submit their work to literary magazines, publishing houses and agencies, large and small, again and again if need be. Getting your work to market is a long, disappointing slog, with no guarantee of success for even the best of work. Liberal writers know this and engage the process nonetheless; conservatives must do likewise. (more…)
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A Conservative Journey Through Literary America – Part 7: A Question of Temperament
by Matt PattersonIn our interview, Michael Blowhard had this to say about conservatives and their temperament: “Conservatives are often practical, non-theoretical people with an aversion to flossiness and silliness. And the American literary world as it’s currently constituted is pretty damn pretentious and silly.”
My musician friend Martin has similar thoughts. He feels a vast gulf separates the liberal and conservative mind. He describes conservatives (again, generally) as serious in thought, and more apt to value personal responsibility and spiritual-based morality, while artists, he says, tend to have, and maybe even need to have, more lax work and personal ethics. Creative people, he tells me, want to push the envelope, move beyond the status quo, an attitude which they tend to apply to all aspects of life. Again, it comes down to messiness. Conservatives don’t like a mess; liberals love ‘em.
The lifestyle of Bohemia is a prefect example – late nights, sundry substances, many partners; these and other staples are less likely to tempt the conservative temperament by definition.
But even granting that conservatives are temperamentally less inclined to participate in the Bohemian lifestyle, it is a vile (and destructive) myth that Bohemia and artistry necessarily go hand in hand. Many writers and artists, many great writers and artists, have lived stable, relatively tranquil lives consistent with the conservative temperament. (more…)
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Johnny Cash: Fade to Black
by Matt PattersonLast night, I dreamed of Johnny Cash. He was sitting at the edge of my bed with a guitar, strumming and humming no tune in particular. Then he stopped, looked at me and said, “You got to play, son.” I woke with a start.
I remember when Cash died in September, 2003. It was strange that it hit me so hard. He had, after all, been ill for quite some time. I remember him being diagnosed with Shy-Drager Syndrome, a mysterious, degenerative nervous ailment. That turned out to have been a misdiagnosis, though he was still plagued with diabetes, and bouts of pneumonia which hospitalized him for long stretches. And, of course, the massive drug and alcohol abuse which characterized his early life had taken their toll as Johnny slid from middle into old age.
In the spring of 2003, his wife of over three decades, June Carter Cash (who wrote his most famous song, Ring Of Fire about their tempestuous romance) passed from the earth, leaving Johnny without his best friend and closest companion. It is a cliched truism that, when one lifelong partner dies, the other often follows in rapid succession. When two hearts beat together for so long, they can no longer beat independently, and so it proved for Mr. and Mrs. Cash.
I was raised in rural Colorado, with naught but country music to grace my ears through my early youth. I detested it so, the sad sameness of it all, the poverty of its vision. Country musicians made music seem so small. Then I heard Johnny. (more…)
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A Conservative Journey Through Literary America – Part 6: Mamet of Tarsus
by Matt PattersonIn March 2008, Pulitzer Prize winning playwright David Mamet, author of “Glengary Glen Ross” and the man many consider America’s greatest living dramatist, wrote an essay for The Village Voice titled “Why I am No Longer A Brain Dead Liberal.” This essay was a thunder clap in the arts community, leaving, as Dinesh D’Souza put it, the “left-leaning literary and cultural intelligentsia…in shock.”
The Saul-like conversion of Mamet has produced reams of commentary from both the left and the right, but it is the reaction of the left that is especially interesting. Many in the liberal “intelligentsia” have greeted the news by openly wondering whether such a political shift will result in the loss of Mamet’s famous creative powers. A “depressed” Michael Billington, for one, writing in The Guardian, is fearful of what Mamet’s conversion portends for his work because, “the precedents for a shift to the right on the part of creative artists are not exactly encouraging.” (more…)
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A Conservative Journey Through Literary America – Part 5: A Conversation With John Derbyshire
by Matt PattersonJohn Derbyshire, columnist, essayist, critic, raconteur, has an opinion. On everything, it seems. Thankfully, he is not shy about sharing them, and was kind enough to speak with me by phone one afternoon.
In addition to wearing the above listed hats, Derbyshire has also written a strange and wonderful little novel called Seeing Calvin Coolidge in a Dream, a book described in the New York Times as, “a bouncy, Capraesque tale of midlife crisis, romantic confusion and spiritual regeneration.” (The Times review was so favorable that it puts the conceit that conservative authors can’t get a fair shake from the liberal media in a good bit of jeopardy).
I asked Derbyshire about Coolidge, the writing of which he recounts with both fondness and exasperation, with decided emphasis on the former. He claims that writing fiction puts one in a state of “aesthetic bliss” (to paraphrase Nabachov), the prime virtue of which is an expansion of perspective that “…separates you from the everyday world.” He tells me that writing a good novel gives one a pleasure many times that of reading a good novel, which, if true, must be a high state of bliss indeed. (more…)
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A Conservative Journey Through Literary America – Part 4: The New Formalism
by Matt PattersonIn the beginning there was the word, and it had form.
Homer wrote his two great works, The Iliad and The Odyssey, in dactylic hexameter. Not for arbitrary reasons was it so organized – in pre-literate Greek society, epic poetry was sung, and the fixed metrical structure allowed for ease of memorization for the poet while simultaneously lending a pleasing musicality for the listener. This relationship between music and words, a relationship both practical and aesthetic, continued to be enshrined in poetic structural forms for millennia.
Until Whitman.
That beautiful, bearded, destructive bastard knocked poetic form hard to the ground with his free, expansive, structureless verse. The fact that it was also thrilling and brilliant and original had the unfortunate effect of encouraging lesser poets to write in a likewise fashion, and what Whitman had floored in the 19th century was thoroughly killed in the 20th. Music and verse became decoupled; form and structure became increasingly ridiculed as backwards, stifling, archaic, not unlike bourgeoisie society itself.
Until… (more…)
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A Conservative Journey through Literary America – Part 3: To Write or Not to Write
by Matt PattersonMr. Blowhard gives us several juicy bones upon which to gnaw.
First, the point about closet conservatives. They come in one of two breeds: 1) those who hold conservative views but keep them quiet, preferring to avoid discussing politics altogether for fear of being sniffed out, and 2) those who not only hide their political views, but openly and falsely profess liberal views.
My good friend Martin, a professional musician, admits to me that he is among the former. “When I’m at social events, or any gathering of entertainers, and they start talking about Bush is evil, blah, blah, blah, I just bite my tongue, because I know that even if I say something, I’m not going to have time to correct all their stupid errors and assumptions, and even if I did, there’s no damn way they’re gonna listen to me anyway.” It sounds like you think artists are dumb, I say. “They are,” he answers with a sigh. “Incredibly.”
For Martin, and those of his breed, I have genuine sympathy. An artist in his position is surrounded constantly by people with whom he must work, with whom he must get along for work to both keep coming and run smoothly. Many of these co-workers are personal friends. This last is no small matter – artists are intensely clannish, and form tight personal bonds. So in my friend’s case, why jeopardize friendships? Why jeopardize income? Perfectly understandable, it seems to me, that he lets his friends and co-workers prattle on.
The latter breed, however, the ones who affect a liberal bias, projecting a false beard to the world, are a different matter. This is truly insidious, because the aim here is not just to protect one’s income by muting beliefs, but to gain income (and friends, I suppose) under false pretense. (more…)
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Dennis Miller: Capitalist Hero
by Matt Patterson
Dennis Miller started out on the political left and, as he matured (helped along considerably by the shock of 9/11), he migrated to the political right.
In this wayward sojourn, he is in fine intellectual company: To name but a few, David Horowitz (former campus radical), Irving Kristol (one time Trotskyite), and Ronald Reagan (early FDR-New Dealer). And as is usually the case with someone who has viewed the world through both left and right prisms, Miller possesses exceptional insight into the relative strengths and weaknesses of both ideologies. (more…)
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A Conservative Journey Through Literary America — Part 2: A Conversation With Michael Blowhard
by Matt PattersonMichael Blowhard, of 2Blowhards.com fame, describes himself as “…. a blogger who has lived and worked in the NYC arts and media worlds for 30 years, and who worked in and around the NYC trade book publishing world for 15 years.” Surely, I surmised, this is someone who may have some answers. Mr. Blowhard was gracious enough to answer at length a series questions via email.
Do you think that there are fewer conservatives (artistic, political, or both) in the arts generally, and literature in particular?
A two-part answer.
Part one is that I have a super-inclusive view of “culture.” We’re all immersed in culture whether we know it or not, and whether we want to be or not. We clothe ourselves, we watch TV and movies and flip through magazines, we eat, we listen to stories and jokes, we drive cars and have opinions about airports and restaurants … That’s all culture. So from that point of view we’re *all* “in the arts.” (more…)
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A Conservative Journey Through Literary America — Part 1: Introduction
by Matt PattersonBig Hollywood is a unique and long needed institution – a place where conservatives can gather and talk about pop culture and entertainment, the ultimate goal being, as I understand it, to encourage conservatives to engage in the culture war through the arts.
While the best tactics to achieve this goal are open to debate, its ultimate worth and necessity are indisputable – for too long, conservatives have ceded the most influential segments of society, from academia to Hollywood, to the Left with nary a fight. The current sorry state of our movement is in no small measure the result of this refusal to engage the battle of ideas where it impacts people the most- the culture that they absorb every day through radio, Internet, television, and movies.
The piece which will appear in eight installments, one chapter each Saturday and Sunday, over the next four weeks, however, will deal more specifically with the literary world, and the conservative’s place therein. For contemporary literature (by which I mean drama, poetry, and written fiction) is also more or less the exclusive province of left-wing thinkers and practitioners.
Some may argue that literature these days is not nearly as influential as movies, say, or television, and therefore perhaps not as worthy of conservative efforts to engage. On the face this is true – far more people watch Sex and the City, for example, than read The Kenyon Review. But in a larger sense, this argument misses the point and dangerously underestimates the influence of literature as a vehicle for poisonous ideas to enter the cultural mainstream. (more…)
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Bob Dylan and the Haunting of America
by Matt PattersonThe new Bob Dylan CD Together Through Life comes in a bright, plastic jewel case, but it may as well be cuneiform scratched on a baked clay tablet. Sure enough, though the shrink-wrap crackles and snaps at the unwrapping, the dust of a century and half of American music blows up into your face:
“Beyond Here Lies Nothing” shambles to life like a dusty corpse shuffling to a slow and sloppy rumba. Dylan oversees the proceedings: part funeral director, part carnival barker, commanding ancient instruments and sentiments with a wink and a throaty growl.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, tonally, musically, lyrically, is “I Feel A Change Comin’ On”- imagine a sunny spring stroll down a country lane with your heart subsumed with thoughts of a new and tender love, and you have an idea of what this tune will do to you.
That Dylan can command these two diametrically opposite songs (on the same album, no less) is testimony to his expansive talent – he is large, he contains multitudes, and is frighteningly comfortable with all the sides of his protean and encompassing nature. (more…)
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Wolverine: Are Critics on Crack?
by Matt PattersonJust before seeing ”X-Men Origins: Wolverine,” I checked the Tomatometer, hoping against hope that there had been a sudden surge since I had last checked it a half hour previously. No such luck: The ”Wolverine” TM still stood at a dismal 38%. I glumly trucked over to the theater, fairly certain it would suck, just hoping it wouldn’t ”Fantastic Four” suck.
Having now seen it, I have just one question: What are these critics smoking, and where can I get some (ok, that’s two questions)?
To be sure, the first installment of the proposed “X-Men” prequels has its share of flaws, and some of the criticism is more than fair. So let’s get the bad out of way first: (more…)
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‘Red Eye’ at 500
by Matt PattersonIs there a stranger show on television than “Red Eye w/ Greg Gutfeld“?
Careening between train wreck and brilliance (often within the same five minute segment), “Red Eye” has been providing necrophilia jokes and toilet humor alongside serious political commentary and biting social satire for over two years now. In fact, “Red Eye,” which airs nightly at 3:00 am on Fox News, recently celebrated its 500th show. In honor of this momentous occasion, I would like to address those poor unfortunate viewers who have yet to tune in, and inform them why they need to start warming up their TiVos like, NOW! people.
The ringleader is Greg Gutfeld, former editor of Maxim U.K and Men’s Health magazines. His cohorts include Bill Schulz (the best side-kick since Andy Richter) and droll and dreary ombudsman Andy Levy. This crew is rounded out nightly by a rotating rogue’s gallery of bloggers, comedians, news anchors, beauty queens, medical examiners, rockers, freaks, and former C.I.A. agents. Oh, and Gutfeld’s mom.
The beauty of this ever simmering stew is you never know how it’s going to go down – sometimes it warms the belly, and sometimes you gag on the mix (Nutmeg?! In stew?!). You find ostensibly serious people being unexpectedly hilarious (Michigan Congressman Thaddeus McCotter’s fierce, young-Mr. Burns-visage belies a devastating Don Rickles wit), and ostensibly funny people addressing serious subjects – all with wildly varying success. (more…)
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Digital Killed the Radio Star
by Matt PattersonNever before has music been so easy to create, distribute, and obtain. And never before has it been less inspired and inspiring; never before has it been so inconsequential to human affairs. The villain behind this terrible irony? Ones and zeros.
The digitization of music, while in some ways advantageous (and in any case inevitable), has nonetheless resulted in profoundly deleterious effects from which all of the music industry’s current woes emanate. Let us count the ways.
Digitization has democratized the processes of musical composition and recording, beckoning the masses to participate in once rarefied and expensive art forms.
To be an artist was once to be elite by definition. Artistic mastery which the public revered (and, if you were lucky, payed for), was obtainable only through years of sacrifice, study, and struggle. This arduous and uncertain life had the glorious effect of weeding out all but the most dedicated and talented from the artistic professions. (more…)
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U2 & Me
by Matt PattersonI anticipated the new U2 album, “No Line on the Horizon,” with something approaching dread – the kind of dread only a longtime fan can muster.
I stuck with U2 virtually my whole life – from their sophomore album October (the first record I ever bought with my own money), through the ambient experiments of “The Unforgettable Fire,” to their earthy and earnest “Joshua Tree” phase, all the way through the avant-garde “Zooropa” wackiness. God help me, I even loved “Pop.”
Through it all, it had been easy for me to tune out the political pontificating for which the band was known, drowned out as at was by so much wonderful music. But by the time of 2004’s “How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb,” that ratio had begun to shift. The band’s musical output declined in both quantity and consistency, while at the same time Bono’s political activism went into overdrive. (more…)
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