“Objection, your honor.” - Jack McCoy

Law & Order devotees have subconsciously felt this moment coming for some time, but now that the axe has finally fallen, many of us are grappling with television-induced heartache.

NBC confirmed Friday that it had canceled the original “Law & Order,” bringing an end to a 20-year-old television drama that jump-started an era of television production in New York City.

“Law & Order” was on the verge of becoming the longest-running drama in prime-time television history, surpassing “Gunsmoke.” But it appears that the “Law & Order” executive producer, Dick Wolf, has settled for a tie. The final episode of the series will be shown on May 24, NBC confirmed in a news release Friday.

As I ponder the unwelcome reality that one of my favorite shows is, well, done-done,  I’m struggling to get past the unsatisfying fact that one of television’s longest running programs was unceremoniously dropped–with neither fanfare nor closure.   As the process shook out, the final episode ended up being shot before NBC decided to pull the plug.  The end result: What was initially written and produced as a season finale (which was excellent, especially S. Epatha Merkerson’s moving performance and Sam Waterson’s epic rant) became the de facto series finale.  Law & Order’s cast, crew, and fans deserve better. (more…)

NBC’s venerable crime procedural, “Law & Order,” has endured a fair amount of deserved criticism around here lately.  Big Hollywood’s thoughtful critiques of the show’s leftward slide and irksome predictability are, sadly, valid.  Like many L&O fans, I’ve been forced to admit that recent seasons have been quite disappointing.   The word “cancellation” has cropped up in my mind more than once.

That being said, this season has been refreshingly solid.  Aside from the atrocious “Let’s prosecute Cheney!” season premiere, each successive episode has been vintage “Law & Order.”  The most recent episode (“Dignity,” October 23) bordered on spectacular.  *Spoiler alert*

It did not begin auspiciously.  The opening sequence set the stage for yet another warmed-over episode wherein an abortionist is murdered, and the rest of the program consists of detectives trying to determine which anti-abortion nutter did the deed.  The show’s writers usually permit one character to utter a single token pro-life line (“Just because you might disagree with abortion doesn’t justify this violence!”), while the oh-so-reasonable pro-choice characters get the last word.  Having seen this template before, I almost flipped channels.  It seems as though at least one of the L&O spinoff series airs a “new” abortion-doctor-murder episode every year.  One wonders if more abortionists have been slain on this fictional television franchise over the past 20 years than in real life. (more…)

We’re about midway through the current season of Top Chef, and in case you’ve missed it, here’s all you need to know:  There are four clear favorites and two potential dark horses.  Everyone else is dead weight, as far as I’m concerned.

The leaders of the pack:

-Jennifer Carroll.  Very strong and consistent.  By far the most talented of the female contestants.

-Kevin Gillespie (aka Red Santa).  Seems like a genuinely nice guy with terrific culinary instincts.

-Bryan and Michael Voltaggio. These brothers seem to trade wins every other week.  Bryan is more conservative, straightforward, and thoughtful.  Michael is somewhat of a punk, but an excellent chef in his own right.  Bravo is a bit too enamored with this brother-vs-brother storyline, but the fact that they could both make it to the finals on their own merits breathes life into the drama–which the show’s producers have nearly beaten to death. (more…)

As Big Hollywood’s self-proclaimed Arrested Development Superfan, it is my sacred obligation to make fellow enthusiasts aware of The Arrested Development Documentary Project, which just recently came to my attention.  The film’s website is a bit confusing, especially when it comes to ascertaining where and when one might actually see it, but the trailer seems promising (be forewarned, Keith Olbermann makes an appearance):

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Hopefully the finished product will explore subjects beyond the (understandable) bellyaching about Fox’s shabby treatment of the show, abysmal ratings, regrettable lack of audience, etc. 

Note to readers: This documentary is not to be confused with the Arrested Development feature film, reportedly in production. (more…)

Big news for Top Chef enthusiasts: Bravo’s spin-off series featuring celebrity chefs competing for charity debuts Wednesday night at 10pm ET.  I still have a bad taste in my mouth from last season, largely due to Hosea’s undeserving triumph, so I’m eager to see if the cooking franchise will redeem itself.

Here’s the skinny on Top Chef Masters, courtesy of the LA Times:

The cooking competition spinoff — this one featuring “world-renowned chefs” — has recruited a star-studded lineup of guest judges.

They include Neil Patrick Harris, Zooey Deschanel, Morgan Spurlock, “Lost” writers Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof, “Flipping Out’s” Jeff Lewis, and all of the previous “Top Chef” winners. Tom Colicchio, Padma Lakshmi and Gail Simmons will also appear. (more…)

Is your TiVo programmed to record such timeless TV classics as: The Hills, America’s Next Top Model, For the Love of Ray-J, Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Denise Richards: It’s Complicated, Rock of Love, Charm School, Daisy of Love, Bad Girls Club, The Tyra Banks Show, I Love Money 2,  The Real World, Dancing With the Stars, The Celebrity Apprentice, From G’s to Gents, The Girls of Hedsor Hall, Judge Judy, or the fourth hour of the Today Show? 

Neither is mine.

Fortunately Joel McHale & Co. monitor all of these fine programs-and countless others-on my behalf, identify their most absurd moments, then mock them mercilessly in an easy-to-swallow half hour of weekly television fun.  Welcome to The Soup, which airs Friday nights at 10pm ET on E! 

The show, which has existed in various iterations for years, has reached new comedic heights on McHale’s watch.  In a nutshell, it features 22 minutes of distilled television trash; the very worst of what American culture has to offer.  Degenerate attention-seekers looking for “true love?”  Check.  Startlingly self-absorbed celebrities padding their inflated egos?  Indeed.  Washed-up/cashed-strapped stars demeaning themselves for a paycheck?  Oh yes.  The Soup peddles in the lowest- common-denominator programming that’s beamed to cable boxes and satellite dishes from coast to coast every day.  (more…)

I caught a media screening of the new Russell Crowe flick, State of Play, in Chicago this week.  It did not disappoint.  The film’s trailers promise a taut, political thriller with a number of dramatic plot twists–and the movie delivers a pretty solid pay-off.  I’ll admit in advance that I was predisposed to enjoy this film, so take my analysis with a few grains of salt: 

1. I love this genre, and since many of these types of movies end up being terribly disappointing, a fairly well-executed thriller with a decent plot is more than enough to satisfy this customer. (more…)

According to the Wall Street Journal (and linked in the headlines), actor Kal Penn–known best as Kumar, a pot-smoking, fun-loving, trouble-seeking character in the profoundly stupid Harold and Kumar series–is leaving Hollywood to work in the Obama administration:

Penn, best known for his roles as Kumar Patel in the “Harold & Kumar” movies and most recently as Dr. Lawrence Kutner on the television series “House” told EW.com that he will be associate director in the White House office of public liaison.

“They do outreach with the American public and with different organizations. They’re basically the front door of the White House,” Penn said. “They take out all of the red tape that falls between the general public and the White House. It’s similar to what I was doing on the campaign.” (more…)

Yes, I’m a fan of “Top Chef.”  No, I won’t apologize.  Season four—based here in Chicago—was outstanding, transforming Wednesday nights into ‘Padma night’ at my apartment.  Sadly, the recently concluded fifth season left quite a bit to be desired.  After last week’s awful reunion show concluded, my roommate and I tried to identify the reasons why the popular series’ most recent installment was so unsatisfying.  We settled on five major reasons:

 1) The contestants were lame:

This season’s contestants generally fell into two categories: Utterly forgettable (Remember Jill?  Me neither!) and cartoonish caricatures of real people. Precious few competitors combined true cooking proficiency with compelling personality.  Most were one-dimensional: Stefan was an excellent chef who, despite being typecast as the villain, never moved me to the point of unadulterated loathing like Lisa did last year.  Pretty boy Jeff cooked creative and interesting food, but could not have been less interesting.  One got the sense that Jeff could literally burst into flames, and it wouldn’t evoke more than a shrug from him.  Fan favorite Fabio (you born, you be rais-ed, and you die) was extremely charming and funny, but he hardly won any challenges and was frequently on the chopping block. His Italian accent alone punched his ticket to the final four.  Even finalist Carla, who I was rooting for, frequently pushed the bounds of my patience with her food “love” philosophy and her over-the-top reactions to pretty much everything.  (more…)

A few weeks ago, I offered my thoughts on the new season of 24, aiming to quell concerns that the show had ‘gone soft’ in the age of Obama.  The piece highlighted the contemptible pansiness of a Lefty senator (Kurtwood Smith) who was on the war path against Jack Bauer, seeking to hold him ”accountable” for his countless life-saving acts of patrioterrorism: (more…)

It’s creeping ever closer.  I’m turning in for the night.  Thanks, all.  This was fun…aside from, you know, most of the actual ceremony.

His favorite actor takes home the statue.

Did anyone else catch the “joy” Anne Hathaway feigned when it was announced that Kate Winslet had beaten her for best actress?  She actually mouthed an enthusiastic “yes!” upon discovering that she had lost.

I think it’s classy to be genuinely happy for someone else’s success, but I just cannot believe that Hathaway could truly be overjoyed by losing.  Not sure why that bothered me so much.  I’m sure it happens all the time.

Yikes.  Remember my comment about Frieda Pinto?  Not applicable.

I know it’s trite to complain about the length of the Oscars, but I’m fidgety and bored.  This entire production is far, far too long.  The Academy Awards can (and should) be a delight to watch.  Instead, I’ve been stifling yawns for about an hour.

Christopher Nolan must be thinking, “what the hell does a guy have to do?”

She is simply stunning.

I saw the film yesterday, and really enjoyed it.  That said, it’s getting a bit too much love tonight.  I’m beginning to suspect that my NYU film student brother is right: It’s an undeserving lock for the top prize.

ABC cut out here in DC for about a minute.  I knew the recession was affecting advertising, but wow…

Perhaps the greatest youtube epic fail evah.