This is an awkward way to begin, but I must start off with two apologies. First I apologize for being too long absent from this site, due to many deadlines, too much travel to wonderful places, and a protracted bout with that deadly killer flu thing that is the current deadly killer flu thing going around. I intend not to stay away so long from now on.

Next I must apologize to the non-geek contingent of our readership. The essay which follows might not be your cup of tea Klingon blood wine. It hinges too much on a presumed knowledge of obscure science fictiony things that only those with a truly Jonah Goldbergian depth of geek arcana can fully appreciate. Then again, I might be underestimating the level to which the fantastical subdivision of pop culture has permeated the mainstream. You might grok this if you know at least two Vulcans other than Spock, who Tim Drake is (as opposed to Dick Grayson), what the Kzinti are, and where the word ‘grok’ came from. If not, you’re excused without penalty. (more…)

Characters:
Possible: A well-spoken bit of biological material.
Mr. Patronus: Possible’s visitor.
The Setting: A warm, dark place.

(Curtain. Possible is alone on stage when Mr. Patronus enters.)

Possible: Who are you?

Patronus: My name is Mr. Pratronus. I’m sorry to suddenly intrude like this, but I’ve been assigned as your STO.

Possible: Stow?

Patronus: STO. Your Survival Training Officer. Your birth time is approaching and I’ve been sent in to train you in a few techniques that might increase your chances of surviving the next few days. (more…)

Prepare for the ‘Gunga Diner’ lawsuit.

I’m not certain I have anything of worth to say about “Watchmen,” prior to actually seeing it tomorrow, when the rest of the world also gets its chance, but since I was very politely asked (as a comics books industry insider, albeit one who doesn’t rate an invitation to one of the six thousand, or so, advance screenings) to post something on Watchmen Eve, and since, as a professional writer, waiting until I actually had something of worth to share would be career suicide, I’ll venture a few predictions about the movie and how it will alter the American entertainment world in its wake. (more…)

This exercise in running commentary made the Oscars at least halfway bearable. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen for the interesting near conversation. I’ve still got a page of funnybooks script to finish before I pack it in for the night, so I’ll bid you goodnight.

Look at that. We get shame against the right, pro gay marriage, and a thank you to Obama all in one speech.

I think her eyebrows are just fine. Always liked that look. Never could take a plucked eyebrow.

The reason you can’t recall who said that about Meryl Streep is that everyone has said it. She is considered a great actress because you can always see her acting. Lesser talents just seem to disappear into roles, which isn’t a way to get noticed.

Can we please stop using terms like courageous and fearless when describing an actor in a role? Or if not, what new words do we need to construct for what men and women are doing right now in Iraq and Afghanistan?

I like Queen Latifa too, but I don’t she did all that well with the song. It’s just the song I think is near perfect. The noticeable muting of applause during the Charleton Heston sequence was indeed deplorable, but considering this group, the fact that there was no active booing was the hight of class. And yes, it would have been nice to see the actors being honored rather than zooming in and out on their stage mounted TV sets.

I’ll be seeing you is just about a perfect song.

Okay, another confession. I’m also a fan of Bollywood production numbers. My sins are manifest.

Okay the orchestra medley was well done. Good transitions between the different scores and more than four bars of a score before they move on.

Have I just missed it (I’m trying to get some work done during this — two pages to go to meet my deadline for the night) or has there been no references to Obama so far?

Will Smith is actually a personable and likable guy, even on stage in this venue, where so much importance is being lectured into us by important people on this very important night. Good actor too.

Several shots of actors trying desperately to conjure tears during the Heath Ledger award.

Joel Grey and Alan Arkin sharing a stage. Life has its occasional rewards.

Oh, now it just turned into another life lecture. Never mind.

As a general rule I don’t like medleys in song and dance numbers. Pick a song and commit to it, and then wring every atom of entertainment you can out of it. But I think Jackman has more song and dance chops than most think.

The musical is back? I wish it were true, but I don’t think so.

Just saw the add for Nathan Fillion’s new TV series, Castle. I hope it does well. He’s too good to be in another failed series.

The second guy in a two-person Oscar acceptance always gets screwed out of his “thank you” time, so that the first guy can belatedly remember to thank his wife.

When I was seventeen, in the Sunnyside community theatre production of Hello Dolly. Fun time.